the importance of sperm
knowing that things look good inside means that i now have some really fucking serious decisions to make. i have always wanted a coparent. for most of my childhood the idea was marriage and a husband and kids and just a neat little package. now that is unlikely to happen because the only romantic future i can imagine is really not feasible without something drastic happening. so instead i’m hoping to find a coparent in a completely different way.
the idea of finding a platonic coparent is only possible because of the folks in the 20th century who forced the world to acknowledge that there are an infinite number of ways to make a family. the neat little package isn’t for everyone. and because of the women who used turkey basters last century, i can now imagine making a family with someone that i have no romantic interest in. i remember watching Grey’s Anatomy and there was one episode with two women who were both pregnant and they turned out to be best friends who were planning on raising the babies together. unfortunately for me most of my friends are either spoken for or not interested in kids. the one friend i had who was also interested in having kids and willing to do it without a romantic partner lives in another state.
luckily it’s the 21st century so there’re websites and apps and such. unfortunately, the websites don’t seem to have a ton of people on them, as if i missed the boat by about 7 years. there’s an app that’s a couple years old. i’ve heard a couple of folks on the facebook group talking about meeting someone on it, so i am spending time on it this week.
the day after my RE appt i scheduled an emergency therapy session. she helped me talk through things. she helped me come up with a timeline. if i haven’t found a coparent by the end of 2020 i will go ahead and buy anonymous sperm. still so many things i haven’t even touched on.