An architect, a scribe, and a prodigal drop out walked out of a house. Somehow they all fell in love, even tho they don't look like it when they're outside. (next)
As a local citizen in Sumeru City, you must have heard about that loud house in the higher levels.
Infamous for reasons already in the name, it had become a running gag, transcending the foundation of the structure to its well-known owners.
The loudness of that house wasn't anything new, but the occupants and its most recent addition made the legendary house ever so entertaining than annoying. Their names known far and wide, even touching the desert with gossip.
Out comes Alhaitham, the grand Scribe of the Akademiya holding himself to such high regard as both the lunatic and the savior of all of Sumeru.
Next leaves Kaveh with a bit more pep in his steps, so uncharacteristic of the Master Architect when he's frequently whining about his living conditions and roommate.
And last but never ever least exits you, gently closing and locking the door behind you unlike the first two to leave, rubbing at your eyes as you stumbled through the streets of the city with nothing but muscle memory guiding you.
No one knows how the relationship of that loud house came to be, only that one day, suddenly three people lived there. And those three people loved each other, expressed in some way that none of the Vahumana scholars can ever explain.
How you three came to be is a very... peculiar arrangement that people could only know if they asked. But out of your trio, only Kaveh is the approachable one, and even he didn't know the full story.
The true story of your relationship is privy to only you and Alhaitham, but the man would never entertain gossipers (for the sole reason of wanting them to overthink and hypothesize). And the two had made it very clear that they don't want you to be bothered by such trivial matters.
Foundation
No one would ever believe that Alhaitham started this complicated relationship, but he did. And no one but him and his clever brain would know how long he had planned for this.
"I see you're spacing out again," you pause in your walk as you silently watch the silver-haired Scribe make his way over. "Good morning."
"Good morning, Alhaitham." The scholar easily falls into step with you as you continued your leisurely walk, consciously adjusting your hair when you realized how well-kept next to your sleep-deprived self. "I'm fine, how about you?"
You've known the man even before he became a Scribe, even before he graduated and became your senior. How your closeness came to be is already a blur in your mind, but if there's one thing you're certain of, he at least enjoys your company.
You've bonded over collaborations for research before and after he graduated. Perhaps that's what draws him to you, he always liked and supported your ideas as much as he can even when no one does. Sadly, his work and your problems kept your interactions scarce.
"Wrong, it is actually already afternoon. Clearly, you are not fine and you can't deny it now." Oh my - you gently, slowly put your palm to your face, already so done with his antics for today.
It looks like you have a lot to catch up on since the last you talked. And Alhaitham, ever so smart, caught on with the impending long talk who proceeded to guide you to the tables outside Djafar Tavern.
When Eymen came over to take your orders, Alhaitham instead ordered for the two of you when you were about to refuse the service. Right, he's a rich guy now.
"How's your research been?" And at the sight of your sour face, he connected the dots almost immediately. "Same old?"
"Same old Akademiya. They won't fund anything that's not useful or groundbreaking, and I really liked this topic, too." And at his urging nods, you went on a tangent of the curiosities you've been hooked on for a while now, another idea he approves. "I don't understand why they are so heavily guarded with research regarding the history of the desert. I just want to learn more."
"Then leave the Akademiya." Stabbing into the Tandoori Roast Chicken a little too harshly, you looked at him with wide, incredulous eyes. "What? If the Akademiya is restricting you then you can continue your research without their laws applying to you."
Lunatic. That's just like him. Looking at you innocently with a raised brow as if he didn't just say something so out of pocket.
"You know I can't do that."
"Why not?" Bingo! That hesitant side glance confirmed his hypothesis easily, there's more than just the Akademiya that's putting circles under your eyes. Even as you occupied yourself with chewing the chicken, he kept his eyes on you like a hawk.
You sighed. "Research is my only income, unlike you, Scribe." He must be paid really well for his position, after all. "Rent in the City is also rising, I have to pay that next week, too. I'm so tired."
What is up with the people his close to and financial problems? He shakes his head. "Then drop out of the Akademiya and live with me." Unfortunately, this time he didn't care that you had chicken in your mouth. He continued while you're busy coughing your lungs out. "With my income, I'm more than glad to support your research. With this arrangement, you can focus on what you want and your health as we-"
HUH?! "Shu - fu - shut, shut up for a second." Eymen quickly came to your aid with a glass of water after seeing the commotion, but as he was about to pat your back, a stern look from your friend(?) made him think twice. "Do you even know what you're saying?"
"Yes. It's quite simple really," Alhaitham sat up straighter on his seat and uncrossed his arms. "I'll be your research support, I can even help you on them if need be, and living under my roof will remove you of financial burden.
"Deal." Eymen let out a loud 'huh?!' as he looks at you like you have a fungus head. "And I assume that you want something out of this, too?"
Nodding approvingly of your perceptive thinking, his next words both had you and Eymen reeling. "In exchange, date me and Kaveh."
... On second thought, it's not just you and Alhaitham that knows the true story.
But no one ever believes Eymen the bartender.
Surveying
Apparently, they were not in a relationship. Apparently, Kaveh doesn't even know about the terms and conditions of what transpired that day.
"Oh! Fancy meeting you here!" With the context, you awkwardly reciprocated the hug the architect greeted you with.
"You two know each other?" Alhaitham emerged from the guest room were your bags and items will be making home until this arrangement is over.
Kaveh, your Kshahrewar senior raised to the power of 2 was someone you had also collaborated with beforehand. Learning about the different periods Sumeru went through, as well as the civilizations of the other regions, the architect thought it was common sense to ask you for building inspirations.
The architecture was a part of your studies, right? Perhaps by seeing the different buildings all over Teyvat, he could infer his own design for his plates. You remember working on it for two days straight because you didn't want to disappoint him with a half-baked result, not when such a household name depended on you, a no name researcher.
"Well, that makes things easier then. They are staying with us from now on."
"They are?" The blond turns to you. "You are?!" You nod. "Oh, an angel descends from the skies to preserve my sanity in this house!"
You shake the hand offered to you, his smile brightening up more. "Let's get along, shall we?"
And get along you did. To be fair, it wasn't really that hard knowing Kaveh is Kaveh, and Alhaitham as his point of reference makes everyone look like saints.
However, being in the middle of these two also guarantees you to always be in the middle of their notorious arguing, even after you all settled into a genuine relationship.
"It's called a passion project, what is so hard to understand about that? Then again, knowing you, it wouldn't be too far fetched." Closing your eyes, the taste of the freshly cooked baklava became more apparent to your taste buds.
"It's not about whether this project is so important to you, it's the fact that it is missing a crucial factor: feasibility." Pulling the mug in your left hand, you washed down the sweetness of the pastry with slightly bitter coffee.
"What do you know about architecture to tell if it's feasible or not? You took one look at my plates and think you know better." Gulping your food, you let out a silent yawn as you tried to blink the sleepiness away.
"One look at it and I can see that you've put zero thought to the prices of the materials." What time is it? Maybe you can get some last minute nap before heading out.
"Why you -" Before you can register their morning argument subsiding, the feeling of hands on yours and your cheek jolted you awake.
"Why are you dozing off? Did you not sleep enough tonight?" As Alhaitham takes away the mug in your hand, Kaveh proceeds to wipe the pastry crumbs around your lips. Shaking your head, your blond lover moves to stand behind your chair.
"You told us you have an important errand today, you're gonna be late!" Then he starts to brush your hair back to style it as usual. Prying an eye open, you see a glimpse of Alhaitham cleaning up the table, as well as a hint of a subtle smile when his gaze caught sight of you and Kaveh.
Of course, if there's one thing that Kaveh and Alhaitham can agree on, it's their love for you. And that's honestly enough for them.
Structuring
Alhaitham viewed you as his responsibility in this symbiotic relationship, and when the time came that Kaveh settled into the arrangement, taking care of you became easier.
While it's not apparent, the Scribe hated seeing you stressed or down especially when you're susceptible to it than normal.
Things such as bills, needs, funding, rejected thesis can greatly affect your mental health greatly. And that in turn messes with the functionality of your brain, the same brain that he greatly adores. So with lesser jargon Alhaitham entrusted this information to Kaveh so that they both can look out for you when the other isn't there.
Unlike Alhaitham however, Kaveh's less used to your antics.
A shrill scream that can definitely be heard past the walls of the house made him jump and trip out of his bed, stumbling out of his room as he made a mad dash towards the room where the scream came from.
"(Y/N)?! What's wrong?!" Oh gosh, did you get hurt? Did someone break in?! Alhaitham is going to kill him for real this time!
Turning around from your spot in the middle of the living room, you pulled your hands out of your messy hair at the sight of your blond architect. "Kaveh? Oh shoot, I'm sorry did I wake you?" You thought you were alone in the house.
Shaking his head, his hands land on your shoulders to look for any signs of injuries. But no, based on the messiness of your hair, it seems more like an internal turmoil. "I heard your scream, tell me what's wrong, dear."
"Sorry, sorry, I was just really frustrated -" He needs to get you to clear your mind then, like what Alhaitham instructed- "Because of this stupid DIY miniature set."
"What?" Looking past you to the coffee table, there was the evidence of your frustrations. Cloth and wooden panels strewn about, and a mess of papers either discarded or needed littered the carpeted floor. "Why are you working on a DIY miniature house? Is that a house?"
"To destress." You raise your hands up in defense when Kaveh sent you a deadpan. "I think it's a Mondstadt style house."
"Why didn't you ask me to help then?" Forgetting his initial plan, he went on to seat on the floor and caught sight of the instructions page. Occupied with the interesting structure, you curiously sat next to him as he looked at the pieces. "I'm an architect, this is my forte!"
But... you're the one that's... trying to destress?
When Alhaitham came home, the house was suspiciously quiet despite having the lights open. Did one of you leave the main floor lights on by accident? Hanging his cape by the door, walking further into his shared home finally gave him the answer.
Cut up paper and trimmed fake plants scattered the area together with various small tools that he carefully picked up before anyone could step on it. There is a small model of what seems to be Mondstadt structure in the middle of the mess that could easily fit in his palm.
"This is what you two did the whole time?" But he expected the lack of response.
After all, as he turns towards the couch, there Kaveh laid stretched over the entire length of the long seat with his arm shielding his closed eyes. And there you lay on top, basically faceplanting the architect's chest.
Alhaitham could see the dried up clear glue on the tips of your fingertips.
His attention averts back to the miniature house. And that's when he sees it. Leaning down, the Scribe plucks up a copper wire with tiny bulbs jutting out here and there, with a switch at one end.
Oh. You two must have forgotten to add the wiring before assembling the piece and slept the frustration away.
Chuckling to himself, the man crossed his legs as he sat, picking up the discarded tweezer and glue. What would you two do without him really?
You were startled out of your shopping trip at the sound of someone screaming your name, followed by a person you've never met writing over to you. A mahamata personnel?
"We're sorry to bother you but Mr. Alhaitham and Kaveh -" Of course, it's about them.
It was a fallacy that everyone keeps committing at this point, believed in assumptions without evidence, but you followed the man to the destination to Treasures Street.
And when you stood in between the two quarreling scoundrels you call your lovers, the man who was hoping you'd stop the disturbance on peace looked confused. Of course he was.
After all, the arguments are part of the charm. Just because you came into the picture doesn't mean they'll stop in your presence, no, that's not your function in this relationship. However -
"I made progress."
"You did?! Thank goodness, I was worried you'll have to wait another day for dusk!" Kaveh flipped like a switch at the good news, eagerly suggesting to eat out for the occassion.
"Did you write it down? I wish to compare notes with my own hypothesis back home once we're done. When's the last time you hydrated?"
The public watched in confusion as the trio of lovers left the scene towards Lambad's Tavern, the argument turning into a conversation of jargons and lexicon that they can't follow.
It's always so eventful seeing the occupants of that loud house when they're together.
They just wish things were a little quieter.
Finally, the lesser organized poly series counterpart of CtM is here. Should have stuck to the headcanons format honestly but at least I know this isn't gonna be a one off thing lol
WARNING: NSFW 18+ MDNI. This fic contains smut between all three characters, and includes very heavy kaveh x alhaitham. All characters have consumed small amounts of alcohol, but not enough to impair judgement.
CW: m/m/f threesome, sex, penetrative sex (m and f receiving) heavy BDSM dynamics. Dom!alhaitham, sub/slight switch!Elirah, sub/slight switch!Kaveh. Cussing, Oral, squirting, teasing, fingering, consent is sexy, dirty talk, use of nicknames: little slut, pretty girl, little flower, baby. Anal sex (m receiving) creampie, cumming on ass, mild cum eating, Kaveh gets sex🚂’d (alhaitham inside him while he inside elirah)
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Kaveh’s gaze burned a hole into the side of Elirahs skull, and she couldn’t focus on what she was doing.
Granted, she couldn’t really focus anyways, Alhaitham was consuming her like she would disappear at any moment, his hands grabbing at the flesh of her hips like she was going to run away from him.
She very much planned to stay exactly where she was, but Kaveh watching her made her feel… squirmy.
Eli was no stranger to sex. In fact, she’d say that apart from her duties to her archon, casual sex was one of the things in life that she truly enjoyed without reservations. Well, without some reservations.
Did she go around sleeping with everyone? Certainly not. She was very picky, only sleeping with trusted friends, or people whom she knew were capable of being a lover without the expectation of tying her down to them.
That’s one thing she couldn’t have, a relationship that trapped her. Her freedom to come and go and do as she pleases while serving Lord Kusanali’s wishes was the most important thing to her.
The akademiya tried to pin her down, and she rebelled, causing a lot of problems for her archon, which was the only reason she decided to be nice and play ambassador for her god in Fontaine.
That had ended spectacularly for her self esteem, which is why she hadn’t had sex in the many months since the revolution that happened while she was off playing house with a harbinger. Well, a harbingers half-baked lackey.
Yeah. She was still a little sore about that one.
Alhaitham’s hands were the first hands that had touched her in many moons, his lips were the first she’d kissed in a long time that had made her feel so breathless, and yet her best friends heavy gaze was distracting her from what was shaping up to be one of the hottest encounters of her life.
She pulled away from Alhaitham, the acting grand sage chasing her lips in a needy way that made her grin. She leaned back, looking off to the side at Kaveh, who was perched on the same couch, watching the two of them like they were the finest entertainment money could buy.
“Kaveh,” she said, eyes fluttering as Alhaitham kissed up her throat, leaving little nibbles as he went. “I know you suggested that we don’t stop just because you got home, but I didn’t think you’d be sitting and watching us.”
Elirah felt Alhaitham grin against her skin, his nips growing harsher as she held back noises, watching Kavehs red eyes glimmer in the candlelight.
“Why wouldn’t I watch?” Kaveh said, leaning an arm against the back of the couch and resting his head there, tilting it playfully. “This little scene has been a long time coming, though I thought it would take you both much longer, being as stubborn as you are. I owe Tighnari money now.”
“Excuse me?” Elirah tried to sound offended, but it was so like the architect and the forest ranger to make bets on stupid, petty things like this.
Tighnari had once suggested a betting pool on when Alhaitham and Kaveh were finally going to break and become an item, but Elirah refused to take part in it, if not for anything but the sheer fact that the archer was way too greedy about his starting wagers.
Speaking of the two of them…
“Are you sure you’re not just jealous, Kaveh?” She tried to hide the whimper at the end of her question as Alhaitham licked and sucked on the sensitive skin beneath her ear, but her eyes fluttered back whether she wanted them to or not, and her question lacked the teasing tone she’d intended.
“Me, jealous?” Kaveh leaned forward, and she could smell the faint scent of wine on his breath. Not enough to make him drunk, but apparently enough to make him honest. “No, I can have him whenever I please, but seeing you like this is a rare treat, little flower.”
Elirah flushed despite herself. Kaveh called her little flower when she was younger, many years his junior and trailing after him with Padisarahs in her pockets, in her hair, clutched in her hands, only stuck together because their mothers were close once.
“S-so he finally admits to sleeping with the scribe?” Alhaitham continued to lick and kiss and paw at her as she tried to keep her cool. “I thought the light of Kshahrewar was so far above sleeping with his juniors?”
Kaveh lifted a lithe hand to her face, tucking a strand of her disheveled hair behind her ear as he smiled dreamily, though there was a heaviness behind it, a sort of mischief that Elirah rarely saw.
“There are a few exceptions, it would seem.”
Eli shuddered at the implication. She’d always found Kaveh very beautiful, very attractive, but she had never really entertained the idea that he would be interested in her in that way.
Alhaitham scoffed a bit, pulling away from Elirahs red and flushed skin, leaving little spots that she was sure were purpling as he spoke.
“Are you going to kiss her, or am I going to have to shut you up myself?” He looked at the architect pointedly, and Elirah squirmed in his lap at the thought.
“You should shut him up, I want to see that.” She whispered.
Alhaitham’s eyes thinned in mirth, and he promptly deposited Elirah beside him, rolling quickly onto Kaveh, pinning him against the back of the couch.
“Wha— hey!” Kaveh exclaimed. “I was enjoying the show!”
Alhaitham hummed against Kaveh’s lips. “Well now she can enjoy a little show as well.”
Alhaitham devoured Kaveh with the same ferocity she’d met when their own lips combined just moments ago. Kaveh seemed helpless, lost, completely unable to break free from the spell that Alhaithams tongue had on him, and with the moans and whimpers he released as the scribe carried on— it seemed like he was very much content with staying put.
The buzzing spot between Eli’s legs throbbed as she watched the two in front of her moan and kiss and grope at each other, her eyes trailing to where Alhaithams hand palmed over Kaveh’s groin and he squeezed, making Kaveh buck his hips and whine pitifully.
“Eli, come here.” Her eyes fluttered to where Alhaitham had broken the kiss, his eyes dark and expression teasing.
She obeyed, the gratification of seeing Kaveh get flustered when Alhaitham picked her up and sat her in the architect's lap was well worth obeying something Alhaitham told her to do. He persisted in his demanding role, pushing her head towards Kavehs’s as the scribe kneeled on the floor in front of them.
“You two can enjoy yourselves up there, I’ll be down here for a moment.”
Eli watched as Kaveh’s expression shifted, and she could feel movement behind her, but it wasn’t until she felt Alhaitham’s hair brushing against the backs of her thighs that she realized what the scribe was up to.
“Do you get the acting grand sage on his knees for you often, Kaveh?” She whispered, grinning as Kaveh moaned, his eyes squeezing shut as if he was trying to concentrate.
Kaveh just grabbed her by the back of her head, his long fingers tangling in her hair. He yanked her closer, so close that their noses touched, their breaths mingled.
“Just wait until he starts on you, you little minx.” Kaveh was breathless, his retort sounding far less menacing than she’s sure he meant, but it caught Alhaithams attention. He reached his hands up to palm at her bodysuit, fingers brushing along her breasts in search of her zipper.
He paused his mouthing of Kaveh’s cock to sit up and shuck her clothes down and off her once he pulled the zipper free. Kaveh’s eyes flickered to her chest as his face flushed, but he quickly averted them to the ceiling as Alhaitham managed the awkward task of removing her clothing while she was still on his lap.
“If you want this to continue in the direction it's going Kaveh, it's okay for you to look at me.” Eli smirked.
Alhaitham snaked his arms around Elirahs waist, warm hands grabbing at the skin there as he eyed Kaveh over her shoulder.
“Do you want to stop?” He asked, seeking out Kavehs gaze.
The architect’s eyes flickered from Eli’s chest to Alhaitham’s eyes and back, his fluster growing more evident.
“No, no, I want this, this is….” Kavehs hands rested just above Alhaithams, his eyes warmly tracing her bare skin, bared just for the two of them.
“This is perfect. I want to continue. I’m just…” Kaveh paused, his expression growing sheepish.
“Are you nervous because you’ve not been with a woman before, Kaveh?”
The blond tensed beneath her.
“You really don’t know the art of subtlety do you?!” Kaveh snapped, his brows furrowing.
“Hey,” Elirah cupped Kavehs cheeks in her small hands, tilting his face up to meet her gaze head on. “Everything’s okay. Do you want to take things slow? I’m okay with slow.”
His eyes shifted between hers, and for a moment, he looked a bit startled. But he must’ve realized who he was with, because he then hung his head a bit in shame, making her bear the weight of it in her hands.
“No, I’m… I’m amiable to the pace Alhaitham is setting. I just don’t want this to ruin anything between us. Like, what if I—“
“Kaveh.” She cut him off.
He looked up at her.
“Kiss me.”
He looked confused, but hesitantly wrapped his other hand around her head, pulling her just that much closer as their lips connected. He kissed her gently, but with passion, tongues lacking hesitancy as the heat of the moment overcame them.
It felt lovely, kissing Kaveh. Her chest warmed— he was so beautiful, his lips were so soft. She felt Alhaithams hands tighten on her waist, he must have thought them beautiful together as well.
She pulled back gently, feeling him lean and chase the feeling of her lips. She smiled. Looking at him with all the love and care she had held for him all these years.
“You’re still my best friend Kaveh, nothing will ever take that away. It might change, it might grow, but I’ll never stop caring for you.”
His face grew incredibly red then, and he moved his hands to wrap around her shoulders, pulling her close and out of Alhaithams grasp to hold her in his arms.
He hugged her, holding her naked body close for quite some time before he spoke.
“Okay. Then let’s keep going. I want to keep going if you both want to.”
“I was perfectly fine without the theatrics, but as long as we’re all understanding of what’s going on here, I’d like to continue.” Alhaithams voice sounded like he was rolling his eyes, so Elirah gave him a playful smack on the arm behind her.
“Don’t you be like that, some of us need to talk things out before we pounce on each other, there’s nothing wrong with that, you brute.”
Alhaitham just hummed, pushing her upper body back down towards Kaveh, hoisting her ass a bit further into the air before mouthing across the round flesh. He nibbled as he came closer to her thighs, making her squeak and blush as Kaveh chuckled at her wide eyes.
Alhaitham then dove directly between her legs, licking up her core without warning, making her moan and squirm.
“Oh, fuck!” Her eyes clenched, and she gripped onto Kaveh’s sides, tugging on his shirt.
“I told you. That damned tongue is good for more than just talking shit, you know.” Kaveh snickered, eyeing her expressions with lust.
“I— I can see w-why you keep him around now.” Elijah stuttered out. Earning herself a playful smack on the ass from the scribe.
She jumped, whimpering at the sharp sting that accompanied the pleasure oozing from her core as Alhaitham licked and suckled at her clit.
He pulled away, and suddenly Kaveh tensed again, letting Eli know that he was right back to sucking him off.
Now that she could focus a bit more, she leaned in and mouthed her way across Kaveh’s jawline, suckling on the skin of his throat and leaving little love bites as she went.
The blond continued to squirm as she pulled at his shirt, and she could feel Alhaithams head bobbing just beneath her ass— his hair brushing against her thighs in quick motions. She could hear the slurping noises as she pulled Kaveh’s shirt up and off of him, her hands roaming his chest as he tossed his head back on the couch.
“Fuck!” Kaveh whined as Elirah raked her blunt nails down his chest, just hard enough to leave faint red lines in their wake.
She bent down to give his nipple a little kitten lick, delighted that he seemed particularly sensitive there, and she proceeded to lick and suck all across his chest until he was whimpering and pushing at her shoulders like he was about to burst.
“You— you both… I’m gonna—!” She stilled, watching him pant and whine as Alhaitham stopped as well, pulling away to rest his chin on Elirah’s shoulder.
Kaveh’s chest rose and fell rapidly, and he squirmed, bucking himself up so hard that his dripping cock brushed against Elirahs bare ass, and she grinned a bit, enjoying his shameless desperation.
“Don’t tell me you were expecting to cum so soon?” Alhaitham said, bringing his hands around to Eli’s chest, squeezing her breasts for the blond’s viewing pleasure. “And with such a beautiful woman in your lap, receiving absolutely zero attention. How selfish of you, Kaveh.”
Kaveh sputtered, his face red and hands gripping her hips as he continued shifting and bucking beneath her.
“Fffuck, please!” He whined. “You don’t always have to be so fucking mean, Alhaitham!”
“Hah.” Alhaitham huffed. “Mean? You don’t even know the definition of the word.”
The acting grand sage grabbed Elirah as if she weighed absolutely nothing to him, flipping her around and pushing her back against Kaveh’s chest, trapping his cock against her plush ass.
Kaveh hesitantly wrapped his arms around Elirah, avoiding her breasts but squeezing the flesh around her waist appreciatively.
Alhaitham lifted his hand, thrusting his fingers at Kaveh’s mouth with a firm demand to suck, and Kaveh obliged, licking and sucking at them rather provocatively, making Elirah’s core throb with the sight of it in her peripherals.
“Haitham,” she said, smaller than intended. “I don’t think that’s necessary, I’m plenty worked up, you shouldn’t need to…”
Her eyes trailed to where Alhaithams hand was fisting his cock, she hadn’t noticed before, but now that she was turned around it was evident that he’d been pleasuring himself this whole time.
“Oh.”
His cock was huge. Bigger than any she’d seen, bigger than any she’d taken. It was long and thick, the tip the prettiest shade of pink, oozing filthy amounts of precum as he fisted along his length.
“I’m not going anywhere near you until you’re thoroughly prepped, Elirah.” He said as he pulled his fingers free from Kaveh’s mouth.
“Yeah,” she stammered as she eyed the weapon between his legs. “Yeah, that’s… probably best.”
He started with one finger, hesitantly pushing it in, pulling back when he met no resistance and adding another, slowly pushing forward and crooking his fingers gently, making her keen.
His fingers were so long, she’d secretly admired his hands in the past, before she thought she hated him, and now they were inside her, poking and prodding deeper than her own could ever hope to reach.
He picked up the pace, crooking them so deliciously when he found the spot that made her squeak, made her thighs tense where they were spread, her feet planted on the couch on the outside of Kaveh’s legs.
She could feel Kaveh’s cock twitching against her backside, the length of it jumping, smearing wetness across her skin.
It was all so filthy, so hot, so incredibly gratifying that when Alhaitham crooked his fingers once more, she broke, and an extremely satisfying orgasm rocked through her.
Wave after wave, Alhaitham worked her through it, his fingers keeping a steady pace.
“Haitham,” she gasped, “haitham— please!”
He was relentless, pushing her past a pleasurable point into glorious overstimulation, and she keened, writhing in Kaveh’s grip.
Finally, finally, after what felt like ages of pleading with him, he pulled his fingers from within her, stroking his cock with the juices that still coated his fingers.
“Kaveh,” Alhaitham paused, pressing the heat of his cockhead just at her entrance, teasing her. “Remember when you told me I was being mean?”
She could feel Kaveh swallow behind her, shifting her weight a bit in his lap.
“You’re going to hold her while I fuck her, and if you can manage to not touch yourself, to not cum— then I’ll take good care of you afterwards,” he leaned, reaching past her to squeeze at his waist, looking over her shoulder with a stare that bordered on menacing, but oh so hungry. “Does that sound mean enough for you?”
“No,” Kaveh muttered. “That’s… that’s fair.”
“Good boy.” Alhaitham said simply.
His focus trained back to her, and he pushed forward, watching her eyes as he pressed the head of his cock within her tight walls.
She swore she could feel her eyes nearly pop out of her skull.
Her core throbbed, clamping down around him like a vice, just as relentless as his pursuit into the depths of her.
Inch after inch he pushed in, until about the halfway point, when he must have realized she was holding her breath to prevent any noises from escaping.
He watched her face return to a somewhat normal colour as she took a deep breath when he paused, her face scrunching up in what she was sure looked like discomfort, which was half the truth.
The other half was that she felt, to the deepest extent of the word: full. She felt like her stomach was bulging, like he was about to split her in half.
“Are you alright?” He said, and she let a weak laugh of disbelief punch through her chest.
“You— you’re kidding right?” She said, eyes wide, staring up at him. “You’re so…. So fucking huge. How is this even possible?”
“You're doing so good, ‘Lirah.” Kaveh’s soothing voice was an octave lower, whispering gently in her ear as his hands ran up and down her waist in soothing motions.
In her pleasurable distress, she’d almost forgotten he was there, but was suddenly very grateful for his grounding presence.
Alhaitham moved in another inch, slow, before pausing for her again.
“Fuck!” She shouted into the charged air around them. “How— how do you even take this, Kaveh?”
“Should I be offended that you assumed I’m a bottom?” His lilting voice teased her ear as he nibbled on the lobe, hot breath making her shiver.
“She’s not entirely wrong, so there's no need for a fuss.” Alhaitham grabbed one of Kaveh’s hands, bringing his fingertips to her aching core.
“You see this right here? Feel it?” He swirls Kaveh’s fingertips over her clit, making her cunt clench and pulse around him, and she sees for a moment that it’s affecting him more than he’d like to let on. He composes himself and continues though, much to her displeasure.
“That is her clitoris. You should be able to infer what to do from here. Pay very close attention to her reactions, observe and readjust as needed. It will help her to take all of this.”
Kaveh nodded, for once, having no quips to Alhaitham ordering him around. She squirmed as he swirled his fingers around her pulsing bud, and Alhaitham was right, it did help ease the slight twinge of discomfort she was feeling.
She moaned, arching her back as Alhaitham pulled out ever so slightly to push back in, Kaveh’s fingers swirling around her clit diligently, so softly.
“Doesn’t that feel better, pretty girl?” Alhaitham murmured in her ear, sinking in a bit deeper, almost to the hilt now.
She felt like she was going to burst, but the ache in her clit was nearly mind numbing, making her body feel warm and fuzzy all over as Alhaitham pulled out and pushed back in, nearly there.
“Do you wanna take it all?” Kaveh whispered to her, his fingers swirling and swiping as she writhed in his grip. “Wanna take it all for us? It’ll be so good, I know you’ll love it, baby.”
Elirah keened, nodding as her back arched. “Please! Please Haitham—“ she gasped. “I can take it!”
“You can take it, huh?” He smirked. “You sure about that?”
She nodded, nearly delirious. “Uh huh, uh huh! Please!”
“You're so filthy, Elirah,” he teased, inching out of her slowly. “But maybe I should’ve expected that from you.”
She whined, but the noise was ripped from her throat as he pressed all the way inside of her, melding into a scream as the tip of his cock pressed into the deepest points of her body.
“Fuck!” Her back arched, her eyes nearly popped out of her skull as she came, Kaveh’s fingers pressing into her clit combined with the feeling of being so fucking full sending her completely over the edge, unexpected.
There wasn’t even that much of a buildup, it just wracked through her like an explosion, making her legs twitch and spasm as she came and came and came, Kaveh’s fingers keeping her going as he watched in awe.
Alhaitham took that moment to begin fucking her, working his monstrosity of a cock in and out of her core with an embarrassing wet sound that would have set her on fire if it weren’t for the immeasurable pleasure coursing its way through her body with each thrust.
She’d never felt so good in her life. Nothing compared to how overwhelmed she was in this moment, with Kaveh murmuring sweet nothings in her ear, his hands finally, finally toying hesitantly with her breasts, fingers twirling around her nipples.
Alhaithams grip on her hips was relentless, his thrusts brutal as he pounded against what she figured was her cervix. She’d never felt anything so deep, it tore broken little “ah,” noises from her throat with every thrust.
“Fuck,” Alhaitham hisses, his hands readjusting on her hips. “You’re going to come again, already?”
She was unsure what he meant, but then she realized she could feel herself clenching, twitching, her moans growing more desperate as the pleasure welled within her like a tidal wave. How he knew before she did— well Elirah figured that was just proof of how fucked dumb she was becoming, because when she came, it overtook her senses, her body contracting as she gasped in surprise, wailing as the pressure of her orgasm pushed Alhaitham completely out of her body with a torrential gush.
”Fuuuuck,” Kaveh groaned as he watched her squirt all over Alhaitham’s lower half, soaking their couch and Kaveh’s pants in her arousal.
Alhaitham stroked himself as he watched her core pulse and twitch as she came down from it, her chest heaving with each breath. Kaveh’s arms held her close, stroking over her sides and kissing along her cheek and neck in an attempt at comforting her.
“That was beautiful,” Kaveh whispered. “I’ve never seen something so fucking hot in my life.”
“I’ve never…” she panted, eyes fluttering up at the ceiling as she tried to catch her breath. “I’ve never done that before…”
She can feel Kaveh’s length twitching and leaking against her back, and she can hear the wet sounds of Alhaitham stroking himself to her image. She lolls her head to the side, resting on Kavehs shoulder, and her stomach flips at how lustful his gaze is.
His eyes are dark, gaze heavy, a bead of sweat runs down his face to the column of his throat and she feels the deepest desire to lick it off him.
“Oh yeah?” The scribe says. “Let’s see if you can do it again, on Kaveh this time.”
As if she weighed little more than a sack of rice, he picked her up and flipped her around, making her face Kaveh once more. She felt him shuck Kaveh’s pants off, throwing them into whatever void took her clothes as well.
“Are you still alright, Kaveh?” Alhaitham asked behind her, and she shimmied her hips, looking at Kaveh’s flushed cheeks.
“Y-yes!” He stammered, his hands hesitantly holding her hips. “But shouldn’t you be asking Eli as well?”
A firm smack cracked against the cheek of her ass, and Elirah moaned, long and filthy, her eyes nearly rolling back as she pushed her hips further back towards Alhaitham.
She could feel him spreading her, baring her to his heavy gaze. “If you could see the way this sluttly little hole is weeping and clenching, just begging to be filled up again, you would realize that the question would be obsolete.”
His voice was sending her, making her spine quake with shivers as she held onto Kaveh’s shoulders. Who knew the scribe would have such a filthy mouth? But she should have suspected, considering his darshan, that the man would have such a way with words within the bedroom as without.
Kaveh’s brows scrunched up with concern as he looked between the two in front of him, and Elirah couldn’t help but pant at the way his hands held her tighter. Protective. Possessive.
“H-haitham, you know as well as I do that verbal consent is extremely important.”
Eli was in such a haze, slipping further into a deep headspace she’d not encountered in a very long time, a headspace that she’d not slipped so easily into in the past.
For all his faults, all their past conflict and turmoil, she trusted Alhaitham in this moment, and wanted more.
“Well, little slut?” Alhaitham breathed, grasping her hair and pulling her back with a tug to speak directly into her ear, his breaths heating up the flesh. ”Are you still alright with the pace I'm setting? You want to keep going? Take Kaveh’s cock for me like a good girl?”
“Yes— yes, yes! By the archons, don’t stop.” She was rambling, wanting more and more of this addicting feeling. “Keep going, just like this, I love this, it's so good— ‘Haitham, don’t stop.” He hadn’t even done anything, was just holding her, but after those earth shattering orgasms, she was pliant and willing in his hands, wanting anything and everything he could give her.
A pleased hum rumbled from Alhaitham’s chest and into her spine, warming her even further.
“See?” He said to Kaveh, thrusting her back into his chest. “I can be nice.”
Kaveh grabbed her face, smoothing down her hair as she looked at him with heavy, hazy eyes. She squirmed in their hold, and whined when she felt Kaveh’s cock brush against her aching hole.
“Gods, Alhaitham. She’s so far gone,” Kaveh murmured, pressing gentle kisses to her lips. “She slips into it so fast, like she was made for it.”
“Mmhmm,” Elirah nods, heavy and dumb, wanting to be good. So, so good for them.
“She still lasted longer than you did the first time,” Alhaitham says, palming over her ass. The easy way they’re conversing about her as if she isn’t even there has her keening into his touch, wordlessly begging him for more.
“You were— ah!” Kaveh gasps as the head of his cock is pushed into her waiting cunt, sucking him in with no resistance as her juices roll down his shaft.
“K-Kaveh!” Eli cried out, her sensitive walls fluttering around his length. He wasn’t as big as Alhaitham, but he still had glorious length and a curve that had her curling her toes up as it pushed against her g-spot.
“Oh my gods,” Kaveh moaned, his hands squeezing her hips as he slowly but surely thrust himself within her, nestling himself deep inside until her throbbing little clit was pressed against the trimmed hairs at the base of his shaft. “H-How are you still so tight after he hollowed you out like that?”
“Filthy.” Alhaitham simply said as he ground her down onto Kaveh. The two beneath the scribe moaned as their bodies writhed together, losing themselves slowly in his guidance.
“Why don’t you ask Kaveh how his first pussy feels, hm?” Alhaitham whispers in her ear. “Don’t you feel so special being his first?”
Something in her quivered as she groaned, leaning her head back against Alhaitham’s shoulder as she continued to grind her hips down onto the blond beneath her.
“Yes, yes! Is it— is it g-good Kaveh?” She panted. “Do I feel good? Am I good for you?”
Her mind was in shambles as she looked down at him. He was so flushed, panting weakly as his eyes flitted across her body, across the beads of sweat she could faintly feel rolling down her skin.
“Yes, baby.” He whined, hands gripping her hips hard enough for his nails to leave little crescent moon indents in her plush skin. “You f-feel so good… better than anything— better than… fuck!”
Alhaitham had leaned forward to wrap a large hand around Kaveh’s throat, looking at him predatorily over Elirah’s shoulder.
“Should I be offended by that?” He said, fingers squeezing the sides of Kavehs throat. “I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve broken you into pieces while sitting on your cock. And you’re still going to say that in front of me?”
Even with his eyes rolling back with pleasure, Kaveh was still weakly rutting his hips into Elirah, matching the pace of her stuttering movements on his cock.
“You’re… you’re gonna deny the way she— she feels?” Kaveh choked out, his voice wavering with the overwhelming pleasure. “I wouldn’t… wouldn’t be upset if you said that she’s— fuck!— that she feels b-better than me. I’d believe it.”
Alhaitham seemed satisfied with that answer, loosening his hold on Kaveh in favor of guiding Elirah’s hips into a more punishing pace.
“It’s like comparing zaytun peaches to harra fruit.” He said, licking along the column of Eli’s throat. “Different, yet delicious. I’ll happily devour them both the same.”
That made the both of them shudder, and Eli felt herself clenching around Kaveh, making the architect cry out and squirm.
Suddenly, Alhaitham’s hot breath was in her ear. “Would you like to see him lose himself completely?”
She nodded, whining at the thought of seeing him even more wrecked than he already was.
Alhaitham dipped his fingers in between her folds as she rode, drenching them in her sticky arousal. A moment later Kaveh’s eyes bulged wide, and he keened, his hands gripping her hips hard enough to leave bruises.
He stopped meeting her pace, breathing heavily as if he was trying to focus.
“What’s wrong?” Eli rolled her hips, hungrily wanting him to keep going.
“He’s got… he’s got his—“ he gasped, eyes rolling for a second. “His fingers… in…”
Elirah groaned, her mind drenched in the most obscene delight as she realized what Alhaitham was about to do. She stilled her hips, leaning forward to kiss Kaveh as Alhaitham worked him open.
After a few torturous minutes, Alhaitham used his other hand to dip in between her legs again, and she could hear the sounds of him slicking up his cock with more of her juices. She leaned back, meeting his chest once more as they both looked down at Kaveh, who was blinking up at them both in nervous anticipation.
“I told you I’d take care of you, didn't I?” Alhaitham murmured down at him. “And you were such a good boy for us, wasn’t he Eli?”
Even though Elirah herself was still deep in the throes of subspace, the prospect of seeing Kaveh reach those heights as well was quickly sobering her up, making her grin maniacally down at the blond.
“Yes, such a good boy.” She said, light and breathy as she felt his cock twitch inside her. “So fucking perfect.”
Kaveh keened as Alhaitham pushed forward, and the architect's mind seemed to short circuit as the scribe simply pushed in all the way with a single, slow thrust.
Kaveh looked broken, his jaw hanging open but not a single sound leaving it as his wide eyes lay locked on the ceiling, his hands white knuckling in their hold over Eli’s hips.
She hissed, rolling them over his as she tried to fuck him out of his shock, and it pulled a very broken whine from his slender throat.
His cock throbbed inside her, and some movement from Alhaitham seemed to stir him up, making him cry out loud, full and needy from his chest.
“Please, please please please—“ he sobbed beneath them. “I’m not gonna— I’m not gonna last, please!”
Elirah moaned, letting Alhaitham move her hips once more as he rocked into Kaveh.
It was hot, sticky, incredibly messy. But oh so gratifying to watch as Kaveh truly lost himself.
He whined, pleading to Alhaitham to let him cum— he was so close, please, please let me cum!
After another torturous moment simply just to tease him, Alhaitham simply told him that he was asking the wrong person for permission.
“Eli!” He cried out, watery eyes pleading with her. “Can I cum, can I cum, please please please let me cum!”
Her pleasure was mounting, right on the precipice as well, but she drew it out just a moment longer to savor this moment.
“Where do you wanna cum, Kaveh?”
He whined, biting his lip as his face flushed even deeper, his brow pinching together as he held himself back before he released a deep breath, answering her.
“Inside— please inside, please let me cum inside!”
She smiled, feeling her orgasm reach its limit, choosing the last moment to gasp out a breathy “cum, Kaveh.”
And he did. It was oh so warm, and he writhed beneath her as he gasped, feeling his cock twitch and throb as he pumped her full. She rode out her own orgasm with the satisfying feeling of it oh so deep inside her.
Behind her, she heard Alhaitham curse out, pulling himself back until she felt hot ropes of his spend splatter all over her ass, dripping down her cheeks to land on Kaveh’s spread thighs.
Their hot and heavy breaths mingled in the charged air of the living room, the couch most likely ruined, but none of them made any moves to get up, to clean their mess.
“That was…” Kaveh huffed, his hands smoothing down Elirah’s hips in a soothing motion, whether to soothe her or himself, she wasn’t sure.
“Incredible.” Elirah breathed, letting herself fall forwards into Kaveh’s chest with a little groan. She felt his softening cock slip free, feeling his cum start to drip from her still clenching hole, but neither of them seemed bothered, so neither of them moved.
Alhaitham moved though, he simply spread her ass once more as if to get a better look at the mess, giving a satisfied hum.
“You’re on birth control, yes?” The scribe asked. “If not, I can run over and get some post-coital contraceptives, no problem.”
“I’m on birth control,” she said, turning her head to nuzzle in the crook of Kaveh’s neck affectionately. “And if you ever say the phrase post-coital ever again, I will stab you without hesitation.”
Kaveh snorted, weakly raising a hand in affirmation. “I second that.”
Alhaitham made a small contemplative noise, his hands squeezing Elirah’s ass once more. “And here I was going to offer to clean you both up, but it seems like you’d both rather do it yourselves, yes?”
Eli jumped, tensing a bit. “Well well, don’t be too hasty now, you’re the orchestrater of said mess, so I think it’s only fair if you clean it up!”
Alhaitham hummed once more, before Eli felt his hot tongue snaking across her folds, licking some of Kaveh’s cum from her in a firm stroke.
“What are you doing?!” Elirah exclaimed, feeling her cunt give a sensitive throb at the motion.
“Cleaning up the mess.” He simply said, licking across her ass.
Though she was thoroughly satiated, she had a sneaking suspicion the night was far from over, and when Kaveh’s cock gave an interested twitch beneath her, she realized she was well and truly screwed.
———————————————————————————————
AN: whatcha think? I really love dom haitham, its literally my favourite thing ever lol
That Loud House : Finances; Kaveh x Reader x Alhaitham poly
"We're broke."
"What?" Kaveh turned and leaned his arm over the back of the couch to look at Alhaitham.
"What?" Sitting up from Kaveh's lap, you peered over the couch to stare at the Scribe, too.
"Let me rephrase that," he would take his time to take off his cape from the coat rack by the door, before making his way into the living room to face his lovers. "We are dealing with a financial crisis."
Your confused stares became skeptical. "That's impossible!" When Alhaitham levels you with a gaze, Kaveh laughs and eases back on the couch.
"Oh please, this must be one of your ruse again. You're the Grand Scribe, you never run out of money."
You see Alhaitham cross his arms with a serious look on his face, and so, unlike your blond lover you began to ponder on the matter deeply.
"That would have been the case. However, recent spendings from the both of you had taken a toll on our (my) savings. For example," he gestures a hand towards the architect. "I just paid the growing tab under my name, you would think I'd remember to pay for my own drinks. Much less a whole crate of them."
At this, Kaveh would tense up on his seat, bashfully rubbing the back of his neck and refusing to look anyone in the eye. You were about to speak up before Alhaitham continued, now eyeing you.
"I also had to fund a major research project recently for equipment and manpower to deliver said equipment."
Now it was you averting his gaze, whistling a random tune from the guilt. With his points made, he shook his silver hair in exasperation. "My next paycheck is still a week away and we're down to 100 mora. Now that I've made myself clear, I need to head back to work."
That went smoothly, the Scribe thought as he swiftly made his exit before his expression could give away his scheming. This was a lesson and a test he devised to see what the next course of action his lovers would take under such circumstances.
No, they were not financially tanked - not with the intelligent man that he is in charge anyways. But it was true that his lovers' reckless spending under the illusion that they have infinite sources of mora isn't a healthy habit to cultivate, hence why he is doing this now.
To see how they would try to make ends meet under said crisis.
"A week..." Looking away from the door to gaze into his scarlet eyes, your eyes widened into saucers as the situation started to sink in. "We're gonna be mora-less for a week!" The drama queen jumped out of the couch and started spacing in the living room.
You mumbled to yourself, still glued to the couch. "Do you think he's angry at us? Disappointed even?"
"Oh please, he's always like that. To me, at least." Shaking his head, he stops in front of you with his hands on his hips, nose wrinkling in his brainstorming. "Do you think I should sell some of my inventions? The ones I demonstrate in the Bazaar?"
"No one likes those, it would be unstable income." Crossing your arms and legs, you hum too. "Should I sell the equipment I bought then? I can hold off the research until next week."
"I doubt the merchants would want to buy their own stock, nor would there be any researchers who'd have the same equipment needs as you."
This is going nowhere. Defeated, Kaveh dropped on the couch and flopped his head on your lap, sighing loudly.
"What is something we can sell that's easily acquired and enticing enough for customers..." Letting the inquiry linger in the room, you started brushing off the strands scattered over his face, pushing them away to give way to his beautiful face.
Even with his eyes closed, brows furrowed and forehead wrinkled, your man still looked as dashing as ever. Forming a square (rectangle) with your hands, you framed the man's face like a picture.
And when his eyes opened to your shenanigans, a gasp showed your bright idea. "Kaveh, get dressed and get the Kamera."
Work in the Akademiya was bearable, almost uneventful even. There weren't any meetings to transcribe or laws to write up today, and as such he only had to file in the newest thesis that had been approved, it was a normal day.
So normal in fact that he had almost forgotten the stunt he pulled that morning, almost. As he was nearing the street to their house, a flyer on the bulletin board of Puspa Café's Message Board caught his attention.
So effectively in fact that he almost dashed to it to tear the paper from the board. How could he not react so brashly when a picture of his Kaveh and (Y/N) was plastered on it? For an... advertisement?
'Limited edition photos of Kaveh, Kshahrewar star! With additional stock of (Y/N), Akademiya's infamous TOTGA, all sold by Dori for limited time only!'
He didn't need to read the rest of the details as he crumpled the paper in his hand, feet already rushing towards the famed merchant's spot to strike out an urgent deal.
When the next day came, Alhaitham groans awake at the sound of his bedroom door slamming open, courtesy of you and Kaveh barging in with happy exclamations.
"We're not broke anymore!" And you two looked genuinely proud of yourselves at the huge bag of mora in your hands.
Tired and done with the world, Alhaitham could only groan more as he hid his head under the pillow. He doesn't have the heart to tell of his supposedly clever plan, not when he lost half a million from paying Dori's overpriced photograph collections, which he bought the entire stock of to make sure no one in Sumeru had a copy.
Of all the people he ends up being with... Alhaitham squeezed his eyes shut from the impending headache.
Never again. And perhaps later on, he should refrain you two from pulling that business strategy ever again.
Alhaitham's kryptonite is his own lovers. They are stupid, your honor. Wrote this in under an hour while on the verge of dozing off just so I can post something, so if you see typos, uh no you don't.
Strike 3 on me getting a random writing idea while doing mundane stuff:
(Minors do not interact: you will be blocked)
What if the whole time Kaveh was away in the desert for his architectural project, you were there to accompany him?
What if all this time Alhaitham was scheming with the other heroes he had not seen a glimpse of you?
Even if the reunion after the whole shenanigan was disdainful and filled with arguments, Alhaitham was relieved to see you look well despite having to deal with Kaveh alone for weeks, something the blond smacks him on the arm for.
What if just this once, Kaveh let himself be bribed to not stay the night after seeing the longing and lingering glances Alhaitham had on you? That he dearly missed your presence that Kaveh had greedily kept to himself?
What if you do notice the absence of your other lover but kept your mouth shut at the way your Grand Scribe clings to you so desperately?
"Tell me," his ungloved fingers stroking your jaw coaxed you to open your eyes. "How many times did you two do it on your trip?"
Your eyes inadvertently look away from the sheer embarrassment the question brought, only for him to tilt your head to face him, to see his serious face. He is waiting.
You gulped. "F-Five -" you choked at your own moan at his unexpected thrust. "Seven!" You blurt out in a hurry knowing he had caught you.
"I see." He contemplates like the situation was like any other day. But you know your lover, and you know that when it comes to matters regarding your relationship, he was just as competitive as your architect.
"Then it seems we'll just have to keep going until we double that amount." His hands were already positioning your legs for a more comfortable access.
"Double?!" You were expecting at least one or two more than what was given.
"I think it is only fair." The way his eyes bore into yours confirms he wasn't kidding, and the first round started the moment you felt the need to grip the sheets.
By the fourth position change, you've already lost count.
It was only when the sunrays hit the whole stained glass window did Kaveh finally make his way back home, having hit the hay in an inn after using up the money Alhaitham bribed him with for a little wine party with his fellow Kshahrewars. Oh he's in desperate need of hangover food, or in other words, your home cooking.
But when he smelt nothing but coffee and saw Alhaitham in nothing but pants, his day was already ruined.
"You reek of alcohol, you'll wake them up with your stench." Yet he did not make any moves to stop Kaveh despite his warning.
They both knew you won't be waking up anytime soon.
"I cannot believe you exhausted them to this extent." Kaveh sighed at the sight of your bare self still curled up, knocked out under the covers, letting a smile creep to his face before shooting Alhaitham a glare.
"What?"
"How many times did you two do it?"
Pushing his slightly sweaty bangs back, Alhaitham pulls the coffee mug away from his lips to reveal a challenging smirk, a dangerous glint in his eyes.
Physically cannot write anything serious involving these two
Kaveh wasn't anticipating Alhaitham to open the door, immediately dropping his practiced puppy eyes to mirror his scowl.
"What in the world are you doing?"
"This is not about you."
The Grand Scribe couldn't help the scoff and roll of his eyes, but before he could berate him for his mistakes on the get-go, the feeling of someone behind him halts his words. Crisis not averted, as your head pops up to peek over his shoulder.
Your confused gaze suddenly turned to a cold glare at the sight of your blonde lover. Although there's still a hint of bewilderment at the sight of him dripping wet from head to toe.
Now that you look closely, it's raining. Only over his head.
"My (Y/N)," Alhaitham interjects with a deep grunt of our. At this point, the architect only had his eyes and focus on you. "I've lamented on my actions and truly, I am deeply sorry for what I have said." He sighs solemnly, pushing the wet strands away from his forehead.
Alhaitham scrutinized him greatly. "You called their cooking mid."
"Because I thought it was your cooking!"
"That changes nothing after the fact. More so, you simply made it worse."
Alhaitham, and you too consequently, took a step back from the doorway when Kaveh waved his hand in exasperation from the argument that spewed. The now revealed garden hose in his concealed hand almost splashing the inside of the house.
"What in the world - stop that!" And Kaveh immediately complies by throwing the tool away. So much for scenic sympathy, but if the entryway were to be messy, it would be more work for him.
Because he knows how stubborn Alhaitham would be to leave the slipping hazard there for him to clean after, and if none of them does it, you'd inevitably clean up his mess instead. And he doesn't want to burden you anymore than he already did.
Truly, the both of them is enough of a mess to deal with.
Sighing heavily, he bowed his head and placed a fist to his chest. A shared look with Alhaitham confirmed this isn't an act anymore.
"Please forgive my brashness, know it does not reflect my honest opinions. I only did it to provoke a certain someone." He chose to ignore the glare his other lover sent him. "I love you and everything that you do. I miss you dearly."
Alhaitham turns to the side to look at you properly, anticipating your response and most likely act accordingly. He had always been specially attentive of your feelings when it comes to your relationship. He boasts his emotional intelligence, or dare say lack thereof, to deal with Kaveh's shit everyday.
You're more easily affected by harsh words and fleeting glares in comparison to them. Or more like, as affected as a normal person is.
Although, you're pretty sure him kicking Kaveh out of the house after making an offhanded insult about your cooking was a bit too exaggerated.
Eh, he has much to learn.
"Okay, I forgive you." His red eyes brightened up instantly like a light switch. "But you gotta make up for it."
"Oh, thank you, my benevolent lover, my saint!"
Evading his leap for a hug, you and Alhaitham retreat back inside as Kaveh whined about the rejected hug, not at all understanding your refusal to hug him despite being drenched all over. And now he's leaving trails of water on his walk of shame to the bathroom.
"I don't have anything to wear for our date tonight."
Hearing the man you're using as a pillow scoff above you, you looked up from Alhaitham's lap to peak at Kaveh on the other end of the couch, your legs sprawled over his thighs as he was massaging it for the compensation.
Without his fancy garb of many colors, he was weird to look at with just a gray shirt and pants.
"Definitely your fault for pulling that rain stunt." The blonde whined. "Not like the sun or wind can dry your clothes any faster."
You felt his hands still, look faraway and brows furrowed in deep thought. You know that look.
Kaveh almost shoved you off the couch in his urgency to run to his room, throwing your legs up and off his lap to evade falling off. "Must have had a spark of idea." Alhaitham mumbled before turning to the next page of his book.
Alhaitham leaving love notes for you in different languages every time, making great use of his 20 (or was it 30) language knowledge even though you don't know jack shit but it's a win situation for him when you go to him to ask what it means
Kaveh showing you tiny buildings he designed while thinking of you (maybe even one day building a full size for you) ((just like a bird building nests as a mean of courting kekw)) then brutally reminded of the fact that he's still indebted to Dori after building the Palace of Alcazarzaray but he's back to his usual self when he finds you keep the tiny buildings he gave you
I'll be back when I think of more stupid shit like these
Oh my goodness, tying it into the headcanon that Alhaitham has gorgeous handwriting being a scribe and Haravatat graduate hhhhhh even if you don't understand what they mean, you'd still keep it or display it in a collection somewhere because they almost look like art! Sometimes he'll lie and translate it as a specific compliment, so that you'll one day try and say it back to him without even knowing it was I love you oh he's so indulgent
Kaveh could also be making dioramas for you, puzzle boxes, cool-looking useless contraptions. He loves to create and the challenge, he'll build anything pretty just for you. Maybe he creates a diorama of a beautiful setting that you don't think you've seen in Sumeru before but surprise it's actually his vision of what a beautiful wedding with you would be
Oh Cilly we are on a roll, we don't even know when we'll see him next HAHAHHAHHAHUHUuhuhuuhu
Alhaitham and Kaveh pining for the same junior scholar in the Akademiya even long after graduation and would try to one up each other everytime junior visits and the rivalry tension, sparks flying typa shit between them after junior leaves before eventually doing the cliche'd (but still lovable to a degree) "corner said person and ask who they like better" situation
Aight thx for listening to my brainrot
H GHNGJHGNNGNHNG BEING KAVEHDON'D BY THE TWO HOTTEST MEN IN ALL OF SUMERU? YES PLEASE
THANK YOU FOR THE FUCKING MEAL, HERE'S A SANDWICH
Funny thought, what if junior is a Rtawahist and asks if they could ask the stars for the answer instead and they vehemently say no (which is sad cuz the stars would have already said both)
