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@niceguyposes r u ready 2 die

‘ gai! ‘

he’s shaking. trembling. kakashi has thrown himself against countless enemies. he has stared death in the face, tasted it in the back of his throat, choked on it, and never been afraid through it all.

but he is afraid now.

loss is a heavy word against his tongue and the blood of those he’s cared for smear across his mind in distorted fractures of themselves until words rattle in his head. he feels gai’s passion more than he hears it, feels it like an icy chill has overtaken his chest.

‘ don’t tell me... ‘

kakashi is frozen. helpless. useless. the air is so thick with the wretched stench of burning flesh that he feels he can’t breath. vision doubled over. spinning. gai should be moving too fast to even keep track of, a blue, an afterimage --- a ghost. kakashi sees him in clarity. the way his muscles tear, tendons and fibers ripping apart by the sheer force of his efforts. how his skin burns away, flaking into ash, losing more and more of him. gai is a pyre, up in flames and brandishing his soul as his weapon to defend all that he loves ( lovelovelovelove ------ kakashi can’t THINK ). his life is forfeit, he is a blazing glory paving the future. he is hope.

he is fading.

the world shifts and tilts and kakashi can’t find his balance as he stumbles forward. too slow, he’s too fucking slow --- one more person, one more friend he CAN’T PROTECT. it’s always like this, isn’t it? there’s nothing he can do when it matters most except watch. gai had started this, chasing him, and now he’s being left behind.

it’s beautiful, in a way. there is a light which engulfs gai. he is passion. he is strength. determination. unwavering, unfaltering even in the face of death. absolution. this is finality and kakashi swears he catches a smile somewhere in the horrific rupture of being. that was just like gai, to smile at a time like this. but he’s falling. crashing. like a star ready to hit the earth, burning up.

‘gai! ‘

kakashi is reaching, trying to catch him. his hands clasp onto nothing and gai is on the ground and he is on his knees and the smell of ash is so strong it burns as if he’s breathing it in. gai is still burning, his blood sizzling where it tries to fall from wounds. limbs distorted. the gates all open, illuminated and SEARING. kakashi is too quick to grab for him and he starts to crumble. loss is a heavy, ugly word that has stained his existence and follow him wherever he’s gone. he thinks his dad had the right idea, sometimes. ‘ no, no, no, ‘ a repeat, he’s not even sure it’s his own voice. desperate hands seek purchase and gai falls away where they clumsily reach. it all turns to ash in his grasp, even as he tries to cup his face.

gai is still smiling, through it all.

a jolt. kakashi can’t breath. his tongue tastes like ash; his nose burns. he’s upright now and fighting the blankets, scrambling to get his mask off.coughing and heaving and sobbing as he is plagued by an unrelenting thought; gai is ash. gai is dust. gai is gone and you are here and you are alone.

#niceguyposes #ic.#poses aggressively