living happy
Ok- I'm having a bad month, but it's NOT a bad life. Again, I have to remind myself that money can always be made and although it is super-tough being on my own with a mortgage to boot -- I will see through this, and many others. Just need to be in debt... but not too far in debt. It's just a timing thing which unfortunately- when it comes, comes in multiple whammies and everything, everything will be okay in the end. I am very tempted to hibernate and be anti-social and run away from my problems again, but really. What's the use of it? I am facing them head on, taking the bulls by the horns as they say and running free. I decided long ago (never to walk in anyone's shadowww.. ok, ok sorry couldn't resist!! ) that I am going to run happy. I let myself go by comparing again. I need to learn over and over to stop myself every time I do this. My life is mine, it's not to compare with everyone else. I am going to live MY best life. Do MY best work. And if there are no rewards, I can still pat myself on the back and say "hey, life, congratulations to meet you. Thank you for being my buddy, my mentor, my lover and letting me experience all these things. Thank you for teaching me to be kinder to myself, thank you for teaching me to love." And that, LOVE, is my right for living. And as much as I struggle with it- I will, I will, I must be happy and strong and get through this and many other obstacles in my way. It's character building and I can one day look back and say- I've done my best. So thank you life, for yet another lesson. May I have patience, gratitude and strength to go through this. And may I somehow manage to buy those Linkin Park tickets (plea for free tickets are out to the Universe... am willing to kiss the person who makes this happen very very passionately! ), manage to afford my mortgage/travels/life/running addiction, manage to live the best life I can ever hope for before my last breath. This is just a bad month, not a bad life. run.happy!