Nice Jewish Character Showdown 2023 -- Round One Eliminations
Well folks, the first round of the 2023 event has concluded, and 16 hopefuls have been taken out of the running for this year's crown. While we wait for the polls to go live for round two, let's take a second to debrief with those contenders, and break down what makes them such Nice Jewish Characters.
Match One Elimination: James Wilson, House MD
Apologies to the House MD fans who kept trying to push the vote in your guy's favor, I honestly did not expect 9 to have such a high turnout (I'll elaborate on his inclusion another time). I'm going to make my way around to watching this show eventually I promise, in the meantime all I can reference to validate his Judaism is the textual reference to his Judaism in dialogue, the enthusiasm from my Jewish mutuals, and his entry on Jew or Not Jew (which, although considerably dated, was a popular site for me and my Hebrew School peers to browse between classes).
Match Two Elimination: Susan Ivanova, Babylon 5
While I haven't watched Babylon 5, I was pleasantly surprised to discover just how Jewish this Trek-adjacent show is, at least, in terms of canonicity. The second in command of the titular ship, Ivanova is textually Ashkenazi, Russian specifically. I can't speak on specifics since I, again, haven't watched the show, but it sounds like her relationship with her ancestry is tied significantly into her personal plot arc, as she reconnects with it over the seasons.
Match Three Elimination: Avigdor, Yentl
Oh, Mandy Patinkin, the communal zeyde of the Jewish internet. While Avigdor may not be the Nicest of Jewish Characters, we gotta remember dramatic context! And yes, the absolute Gender of Yentl is no small factor in his popularity. I don't regret the picture I used, but I'm sure he would have had a bit of a swing vote if I used the picture of him wet and shirtless. Ah, well. Not like this is the first time Yentl's been snubbed for awards season.
Match Four Elimination: Samwise Gamgee, Lord of the Rings
Yes, the books have the unfortunate way they've reflected on antisemitic stereotypes with the portrayal of the dwarves. But when you look at the hobbits, don't they feel like citizens of a shtetl? Aren't you filled with the warmth of shabbos when you think about a hobbit hole? And when thinking about Samwise's unending hope for good, even in the darkest parts of the journey, are you not reminded of something?
Match Five Elimination: George Costanza, Seinfeld
Yeah I knew this one was going to infuriate some people. George Costanza, you textually Jewish in every way but literal prince, you are the perfect example of the transitive property of Jewish media (Jason Alexander has been quoted as saying that Costanza is Jewish because he's being played by a Jewish actor). Doing readings on invisible Jewish representation through the lens of Seinfeld (and the associated eras of television) is FASCINATING, btw.
Match Six Elimination: Schmidt, New Girl
A very Jewish cast and crew brought this 2010's icon to our screens, and while the humor might not have always been the kindest to his Jewish identity, it's no surprise that he has such a continuing popularity within the former viewing audience. Someone get him a cookie, please?
Match Seven Elimination: Cher Horowitz, Clueless
Written by a Jew, directed by a Jew, played by a Jew, Cher Horowitz is a great example of the transitive property of Jewish media. Plus, with a last name like Horowitz and a lawyer father, there are plenty of reasons to interpret the 90's darling as such. This Kveller article is full of fun facts about the Jewish background of the production!
Match Eight Elimination: Barbara Millicent Roberts, Barbie
Watch Tiny Shoulders if you don't think Barbie belonged in this showdown. Barbara Millicent Roberts, you've been so popularized and Americanized that we've forgotten your roots, my darling! Ruth Handler, Barbie's creator, comes from a distinctly Jewish background, and her family's Ellis Island history is a good way of looking at the way Barbie's been assimilated. Sure she's got her Christmas-y ties, but most Christmas media comes from us anyways, so I think she can get a pass.
Match Nine Elimination: The Baudelaires, A Series of Unfortunate Events
Okay, I'll admit it, I never read ASOUE. It freaked me out too much as a kid, and I've never circled back to it. But it's been on the back of my mind for a while, and now that I'm aware of just how Jewish the source material is, I'm this close to looking up the audiobooks on Libby. This is a step above the transitive property of Jewish media, this is textual. I guess it's characteristic for the Baudelaires to lose, but they can be comforted in how close the vote was.
Match Ten Elimination: Tommy Pickles, Rugrats
So I grew up with public access television, and when I finally got cable it felt a bit like I'd missed the boat on Rugrats, age-group wise. But seeing the VHS cases on the library shelves of my synagogue, I always knew that show was a good case of Jewish representation. The Rugrats was revolutionary in their central Judaism in children's media: not just giving it to a side character for special episodes, but giving it to the main character and spending ample time discussing it. Consider putting the Passover or Hannukah specials into your holiday circulation.
Match Eleven Elimination: The Strilondes, Homestuck
Somewhat surprising to me, but not really since they lost round one last time, the Strilondes have been taken out of the running. What makes Dave Strider and Rose Lalonde Jewish? Siblings through manipulation of genetic cloning, we witness a Very Jewish Wedding in the Snapchat Credits Sequence to Homestuck, where Rose and her wife, Kanaya, are in the center of a horah dance, lifted above the crowd in chairs (here's the timestamp). Besides that, Homestuck can be interpreted through a very Jewish lens (at least to me, someone who has a John Egbert statuette on their bookshelf). Plus, Homestuck has an answer to the Great Frog Debate (their answer is the biggest frog possible).
Match Twelve Elimination: Frankenstein('s Monster), Frankenstein
Sorry Adam, I know losing twice in a row is hard, but to be fair you DID go up against werewolves last time. Why is Adam Frankenstein('s Monster) Jewish? He has a complicated relationship with the concept of a higher power (and in his case, a complicated familial relationship with his own creator). Plus, when I look at him, I see the most famous golem in pop culture. Jewish Frankenstein supremacy <3 (Oh, and while I'm thinking about it, a general plug for the book version of Monster High, published in 2010, which has a VERY Jew-coded interpretation of the titular monsters, imo.)
Match Thirteen Elimination: The Baker, Into The Woods
Musical theater is inherently Jewish, so is it any surprise that a Sondheim character made it to the showdown? Into the Woods is a masterpiece, and when you look at it through a Jewish lens it gets even more so -- especially in the second act. The Baker is one of several characters in the show that really become aware of the constraints of their fairy tale lives, and choose to circumvent them. I'm going to restrain myself from discussing it more since the entire original cast recording is available to watch here, and it's one of my favorite musicals ever so I'd just get incoherent in further analysis if you haven't seen the source material.
Match Fourteen Elimination: Will Byers, Stranger Things
I knew this was going to happen on the #CecilSweep website, but it still hurts a little bit to see Will Byers lose with such a sweep. Maybe it's the fact the Byers house has readily available Christmas lights. Why was he a contestant? Well, observing the transitive property of Jewish media (as discussed earlier), Noah Schnapp AND Winona Ryder's Judaism is more than enough to validate a Jewish reading of the Byers family -- in my mind, they're a mixed household, and kept celebrating Xmas after Lonnie left because the kids grew up with it (plus, they're in Indiana in the 80's, so...)
Match Fifteen Elimination: The Lorax, The Lorax
Did you go to Hebrew School in the United States if you didn't watch or read The Lorax for Tu B'ishvat? I mentioned the VHS library at my synagogue earlier, and this tape was a standard on the wheelie box tv set-up, often used to distract the younger kids who would get bored at the High Holy Days services. He's just a lil' man who loves the trees, that's a mensch to me.
Match Sixteen Elimination: Worf, Star Trek: The Next Generation
I feel like I have to apologize for putting the two Trek characters against each other up front. It's another place where my textual knowledge slips a bit, so when I found out just how Jewish Worf is I was pleasantly surprised. Trek has a very odd relationship with just how Jewish it has been since conception (thank you, Nimoy!) , so for Worf's parents to be all but declared to be Jewish is like. You could have just made them Jewish. Why didn't you make them Jewish (we know why).
