Dec 22, 2019
I met my boyfriend of two years in person for the first time thanksgiving week. A.k.a the best time of my life, (sorry I forgot to post for those of you who follow and know me)
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from Saudi Arabia
seen from United States
seen from Saudi Arabia
seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Netherlands
seen from South Korea
seen from China
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from Malaysia
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from Canada
seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from China
I met my boyfriend of two years in person for the first time thanksgiving week. A.k.a the best time of my life, (sorry I forgot to post for those of you who follow and know me)
I meet the love of my life for the first time
In 5 days
Things have gotten so much better...
It’s funny how life can just throw you abundance at the weirdestt times, isn’t it? I’ve always had a very rocky relationship with my mom and my dad and both have gotten so much better. My mom and I had a talk in which she apologized for everything and took full responsibility for my abusive upbringing and vowed to be a better mother because she didn’t want to lose me.
My father did the same a few months back and apologized for his absence in my life and said he was making it his goal to be more present for me as his daughter. It has been such an emotional few months but I can say I have never had a conversation like that with either parents, nor have I had such closure and clarity. It was an eye opener for me because we were mainly able to get on the topic because I was honest about my feelings and I released them when I was asked “how do you feel I treated you when you were growing up?” Usually I would hold onto that sort of thing in fear of making the other person feel bad, but this time I let it go and I just said it “abusive.”
If you’re anything like me and you struggle with being honest about how you feel, just remember, if there’s an open opportunity to talk about it, don’t deprive yourself of that. Ultimately holding onto everything does more harm than good. It’s feels good to start a fresh chapter with my family that I can build on, I feel very free, family was always one of my deepest wishes because I never felt like I belonged anywhere growing up.
It’s funny because...
I look at my old tumblr posts about this guy that I was stressing about and I look at my boyfriend now, and I see how clearly toxic and unhealthy the other guy was lol. Idk what the hell was up with my mindset back then but you did some pretty fucked up shit to me Zane. Thanks for fucking up my head though because without all of that I wouldn’t have found the angel I’m with today. I do hope you are well though if you are reading this at all lol.
I miss my boyfriend so much when he’s not around sigh...
I get a root canal in two hours EEEEEEEEEE
Oof
This guy that I used to be interested in came into my job yesterday so I had to help him.There has always been a crap ton of chemistry between us and he was really sweet and blushing and you know what It got me thinking because I’m in a relationship now LOL.
LDR aren’t easy but I do love my boyfriend. It’s my first serious relationship and that guy coming in.. AGH it truly tested me and opened my eyes to the fact that when you love one person, that’s just it, you love one person! lol no one else matters romantically.
I’m Back
And I’m better!!!!
I’m so much healthier and happier than I was. I love you all and hope you all have been well <3