#potatorants

[potato55fromspace]

Ok so this isnt what i usually post but im gonna admit something, i used to be on tik tok a lot(tbf i still kind of am js for doomscrolling purposes sadly) until my buddy suggested tumblr, and i wanna say the transition between tik tok to tumblr is INSANE because tik tok was just SUCH a surreal experience shit was so INSANE i couldnt believe these were real people sometimes i wanted to gaslight myself into believing they arent real. So no way in absolute hell did i just find someone being mad that they're getting called out for not knowing international history?? Specifically the HOLOCAUST. Just to clarify i live somewhere in asia the education system? You can guess it yourself, but im aware of how questionable it is and BECAUSE i CARE i try to educate myself and find things that matter, find things that schools dont seem to care enough to teach us about despite the importance it holds. Just a few days ago i was honestly spiralling i couldnt believe my friends not only didnt know who anne frank is but DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAT THE HOLOCAUST IS?? They just know "oh hitler stuff yea whatever" like??????? And i was telling them how could you not know this?? And they had the AUDACITY to say "well its not important" "if they didnt teach us that at school then its not important" INTERNATIONAL HISTORY. A FUCKING GENOCIDE THAT COSTED THE LIFES OF PEOPLE. And we arent children. We should be old enough to know. To REALISE by this time how horrible the education system is, and they have agreed with me before yet it seems they only ever acknowledge it when its to their own gain? To justify their ignorance it seems?? At this day of age if you care, you'll educate yourself and you'd know that. Im not saying im a genius id say i probably dont even know enough about the holocaust to have a full on debate so pls dont debate me in the comment, but i CARE and i do plan on watching a video abt it or read websites about it so also feel free to comment facts about it and shit if u want. You know what deeply disturbed me tho? While i was showing concern for the fact these people didnt know abt the holocaust they were LAUGHING AT ME like i was overreacting or like it was just like any other joke. Some people dont seem to take history seriously anymore. The very same friend im talking about once told me "why do we even learn history its in the past anyway why not move on" it really just.. its so surreal isnt it? Like shit does ur parents ever even like teach you anything? I get a lot of parents in my area dont sadly but you must know atleast SOMETHING? Arent you capable of thinking on your own if youre able to say all this shit to my face??? Anyways tumblr is js awesome i trust tumblr that this post isnt gonna go anywhere specifically to the people im talking abt in this rant, i mean i doubt people my age even know what tumblr is or is interested enough to even get on it and i doubt this rant will get that much attention either but to my educated lads out there tell me im not crazy.. tell me ITS THEM...

[potatorants]

There’s something that’s been on my mind lately… If gender is a construct, then being trans would be a result of social environment, no? I’ve heard arguments that there’s a genetic factor as well but I haven’t heard any studies to back it up. Personally, I don’t believe in altering your body to feel comfortable. Hair and clothes are one thing but getting surgery and physically destroying and rebuilding what you were born with feels wrong. You shouldn’t need to alter your body to feel comfortable. Just because I didn’t like my figure for a long time doesn’t mean I’m trans. I feel like a lot of people are seeking out a permanent solution to a temporary problem. There is something in our society called body dysmorphia and it is certainly not exclusive to trans people. I feel like if you’re feeling negative about your body- like you’re not comfortable in your own skin- then you should get the help you need. Therapy would probably be the first step. A therapist neutral on the subject would probably be best- that way you wouldn’t be swayed one way or the other. If, after attending therapy regularly for at least a year, then you should be informed enough to go through with any procedure you wish. My biggest concern about this whole ordeal is that CHILDREN are making these decisions and their parents are just LETTING them! If we can all agree that you must be a legal adult to do certain things (drive, drink, smoke, rent a car, get a house) then WHY are we left children make life-altering decisions? I’m 18 and I still don’t think I’m informed enough to make a decision like that. While, yes, adults can do as they please and they can ruin their bodies if they’d like, I am begging that the decision is an informed one!!! Some of these procedures and medications will make people infertile!!! This decision is often times irreversible and we’re just letting everyone do as they please! While I believe in supporting your children in their passions, I also believe in getting help when you need it. It is imperative to analyze every available option and course of action before diving into the most popular one that could potentially ruin your life. Thinking like this is what saved me from myself. People are not perfect. I am not perfect. No one is perfect!!! We are people and people are flawed. I want our next generation to be strong and independent, but I also don’t want them to feel like they have to change who they are to be happy. The world is a scary place right now and it’s only getting worse.

[potatomage]

tfw you accidentally were obnoxious all day and wish you’d just shut up

[potatomage]

i can't decide if i want to start posting some of my art on tumblr or not ug

[potatomage]

Rules: Tag 10 followers you’d like to get to know better

Tagged by: @crywol-f (you’ve tagged me in so mUCH STUFF AA)

Name: payton

Nicknames: paytron / paytato / paypay sometimes

Zodiac sign: scorpiooo

Favorite Color: purple and teal

Current Time: 1:14 p.m.

Average hours of sleep: 5-6 average / sometimes more, sometimes less

Googled: pokemon go tips

Current number of followers: 220

Dream job: something with art or chemistry, or maybe physics idk

Height: 5′3 

What do you post: art, sailor moon, memes, steven universe, etc

Why did you choose this user name: i like potatoes n mages idfk

im tagging @lemonween (u should do this joel) @trainernene @direbae20 @ambiguousintentions @imperfectly-unknowingly-insane and anyone else who wants to do it !!

[justalurkerpotato-blog]

I am full of rage right now. I’m cramping so bad that I cannot sleep, I can’t eat, I can barely stand up in the shower, I can’t sit down for very long because it hurts so much, I can’t stand up because I feel like I’m going to puke, and all I wanna do is write, but I can’t concentrate long enough to write because I end up having to walk around to try to alleviate some of this pressure in my lower abdomen.

The last time this got this bad, I had to go to the hospital, but I can’t afford to go now. I had a job back then. I don’t have one now. Thank god, I don’t because I swear to whatever that I’d end up fired because I literally cannot do shit right now.

I’m so angry. I just want to write. 

[justalurkerpotato-blog]

I am...really really fucking angry right now. My Gran thought it was okay to share some personal and intimate  details that I wasn’t not comfortable with other people knowing because A) it’s embarrassing to me and B) it’s personal.

So, when I tell her that I was mad that she said it, she immediately went on a tangent about how I’m not the only one that does this and that she does it too and that she doesn’t understand why I would be so upset about her sharing that detail with other people.

Then she called to attention about my hair and tattoos. “Why do you not want to be in the spotlight when you change your hair color and got a tattoo?” 

Because my hair and my skin are things people can physically see and it doesn’t bother me. My bedtime routine is something completely different and you have no right sharing anything about me that I don’t feel comfortable with.

Common fucking sense should tell you that bedtime routines are fucking personal and that my anxiety and depression are NOT for other people to know unless I’m comfortable with sharing it.

“Other people have depression and anxiety too. You just don’t think that other people have problems too and it’s just you.”

No, no, no, no and a thousand times fuck off. Don’t you dare compare my experience with other people because that it NOT helping me what’s so ever. If anything, it hinders my ability to come to terms with my mental health because “other people have it worse” and then I can’t go out and accept help because that tells me “you have nothing to be fucking upset about because x and x never happened to you.”

My boundaries ARE MY BOUNDARIES! Blabbing my personal life and details to other people aren’t helping me, Gran. I get that you never wanted to hurt me, but telling your church friends about what I do at bedtime or what I have in the same bed as me is none of their business.

It’s common fucking sense.

I get that you’re terrified of your surgery and that you’re terrified about losing your arm, but PLEASE for the love of your God, do NOT tell other people about my anxiety and depression and my personal details like they’re yours to share.

I am an adult. I am your granddaughter. I just need you to fucking accept it and not talk about personal details unless I tell them personally or I tell you that it’s okay to tell other people.

Just..stop, okay? Just please, stop. I can’t even talk to you because the conversation always turns to how you’re feeling and once again, I’m swept under the rug. It’s like I’m not important. 

Do you know much I struggled with realizing that I am important? That whenever someone tells me that I was important, I don’t believe them because hey, I’ve been lied to in the past.

Do you realize how much I still struggle with it?

Just......ugh. Telling me that you’re walking on eggshells because ‘everything you say seems to piss me off.’ No, everything you say doesn’t piss me off! Whenever you overstep my boundaries, and I try to tell you that you’re doing that, you scoff and roll your eyes and then start crying because “I’m mad at you.”

Whatthefuckever.

Been trying to get this story out for about a week now and I can’t even write it. All I want is to get it out and move on to my next fic. I get that I’m here to take care of you and I fucking accept that I don’t have any freetime for myself 24/7 because I’m taking care of you.

But, dammit, when I open myself up to you about what happened to me as a child, what I’m feeling now, and your immediate response is “You need to see a therapist.”

I will see a therapist when I’m ready. I’m not ready now because I still haven’t fully accepted that I’m not a functioning adult and that this isn’t something that I can fix by myself.

I am a fucking broken human being and I’m just....

I feel like I’m done. I need a break. I need my cat. I just need out of this house.

[potatomage]

tagged by @k-xroo

I. NAME / ALIAS: payton II. BIRTHDAY: october 24th III. ZODIAC SIGN: scorpio IV. HEIGHT: 5′3 yea VI. SLEEP: hhahahahaa depends; 4-8 hours if im lucky VII: FAVORITE BOOKS: looking for alaska, fallen, and eleanor and park VIII. FAVORITE ARTISTS: twenty one pilots, halsey, and the front bottoms man IX. LAST MOVIE I WATCHED: i watched madagascar with my sister yesterday  X. COLLEGE: not yet fam XI. DREAM JOB: something with art or chemistry idk XII. THE MEANING BEHIND YOUR URL: i like potatoes and mages what can i say

i tag @trainernene @direbae20 @tinylittleskeleton @imperfectly-unknowingly-insane n anyone else who wants to do it