for @pramzzz
think of it as a continuation for this drabble
Elle est retrouvée.
Quoi ? - L'Eternité.
C'est la mer allée
Avec le soleil.
It’s found we see.
– What? – Eternity.
It’s the sun, mingled
With the sea.
- RIMBAUD, L'Eternité
"I..."
The afternoon light bathes the two of them, pouring from the huge windows, highlighting the softness of her shy smile. It feels like he's staring at sunsets when the golds seeps in between the dark curtain of her hair, spills over the blue waters of her eyes.
Marinette always comes to him in permanent shades of dusks and dawns in his life. Her fingers linger at the edge of a page, thumb flicking the worn paper-ear.
Her hushed whisper was hurried, 'well, this is awkward', as if wasn't meant for his ears. But when she puffed her cheeks and retracted her idle hand to curl it into a fist, he prepared himself to hear whatever she had to say.
Adrien had broken and built her heart too many times. Heard the way it confessed affection for him with each gentle glances, each kind act, silent but empathic. But this time, as she fully met his gaze, there are no roses blooming on her cheeks. No shining stars, no stuttering breaths.
"I had the hugest, most embarrassing crush on you." It was a self-depreciating laugh. She broke from his stare and looked at the point behind his shoulder. "You knew that. People knew it. And they - you endured it long enough."
It's okay, he wanted to say, Princess, it's okay. He knew of the excruciating pain of falling for someone who was far out of reach. And if he were a better man, he could have told her the truth that he can't return her heart. He could have told her that he loved a girl who wore masks so thick that it became his walls, painted in red and black spots, never seeing the world beyond his love for her. He could have told her that he is cursed to love in vain.
One recriminating truth rang true:
You will always love someone who can never love you.
"I'm sorry." He repeats it. He means it.
He really does. It's the only thing he could say.
Or, if he was be practical enough, he could have loved Marinette.
"Thank you." Her smile splits wider, a complete opposite when he had first said those heartfelt words before, like she had never been more free. "I needed that."
He was baffled. His sharp inhale gave away his surprise. Who on earth would thank the one who shattered you?
"I needed to wake up, because, I didn't know that..." She bowed her head, not seeing the way his brows furrowed and how he shuddered at the phantom pain in his chest. Why was he the one who felt the twisting agony? He was the one that rejected her. "I was in love with someone else."
This time, she saw the confusion on his face, as she added quickly. "I'm telling you this because you've been a great friend to me, Adrien. I wanted to be honest with you."
"I haven't even told this to Alya." She sheepishly grinned, with her happiness suffusing all through out her so rapidly that he felt it soak through him. The epiphany of her newly found love made her glow; it felt like a sudden, quick blow to his gut.
( how easily it is, to replace him. )
"And I know you, out of all people I know, wanted me to be happy. You don't want me hurting over you."
"I'm glad." He exhaled, more out of exhaustion than relief. He still gave her a half-hearted smile, and with great effort, he let a little of her cheer seep in to him as he asked. "Can I know the lucky guy?"
She froze, and her mouth clamped a bit. Her eyes nervously went side to side before she flushed in that familiar way that was almost painful to watch. "He...He goes to another school. I...I often meet him at night whenever I..I make deliveries."
He couldn't understand this suffocating weight in his chest. Was he so far gone being so desperate for any form of attachment that the loss of her affection made him sullen? Wasn't he worried about her before when he couldn't reciprocate her feelings? What's wrong with him when a small ball of resentment unravelled like a yarn, wrapping tight around his lungs?
The jade charm on his pocket feels heavy; an indescribable anchor attached to his chest.
( was he even breathing? )
"He likes to flirt with me." She giggles, before rolling her eyes. "Makes so much awful cat puns."
If Marinette had caught his attention before, now she had it in full scope.
"I didn't think he was so serious about me." She pouted in annoyance, her face was morphing into a myriad of expressions that he thought he would never see when she talked about this fortunate boy she probably would give herself wholly. "But it's already been two years, and I think it's a good time to give him a chance."
"A rebound." The tone was odd, as if he couldn't decide how to say them out.
"No. " The anger and intensity in that single word surprised him. Her red face lessened to pale pink when she rectified. "No, not like that. It's been a while. But I've always liked him, but I was unsure about him. I thought to give him...Us," she said firmly, then she smiles again as if the word gave her so much euphoria that she couldn’t contain it.
( a very familiar, satisfied smile, on a different face. it tickled his memory ).
"Give us a try."
Adrien never thought he could do this twice at the same moment.
"I'm happy for you, Marinette."
In response, he catches an armful of her, filled with laughs.
"I'm telling you this because you're going to help me!"
"What?"
"He thinks he's a great charmer," Her eyes slants mischievously, and the way her smile curves into a catty grin almost made him swallow that bitter, cloying thing stuck on his throat. He was a hypocrite. He should be happy for her. But he could not deny that it remained, this almost betrayal, a vise that held him tight.
"But I'm going to outsmart him."
Trust his luck to drop his heart into an all-encompassing ocean of her, just when she chose to look up, away, leaving him to sink to the bottom.
There is nobody but himself to blame.
For the second time in his life, Adrien Agreste drowns.
first, sunfreak’s where the heart is, dr. briefs cat’s the fire that burns the brightest, uchiha restoration, lady starburst’s i think and nesting by melpomene melancholica. ( icarusy, goldberry, ori, cataracta, cinma, visions and neptune47 also make the list here.)then i suggest to go on to the au’s that were the rage during the canon ss manga drought (c. 2006-2009) : from so guhn, sahara storm, annwyd and yukari_rin's works, to most of au's and angst canon from @sun-summoning, blanket-fictions, epiff annie and snappleducated,
blue-plums, doctoress octopus (& her works as pen_x_pistol in lj) and coronagraminea fics are also a must-MUST read. if i continue on from 2010, hm, i will probably say to read author’s written by ofalexandra, sasukekuns windsilk and paige, the angsty works from xxsilverechoxx, the long way home by the general girl, terminal velocity by melitza, entropy by silver-footstepsfor 2014 authors in the fandom? i suggest would be from thegoldengirl, stannide and ermingardbut basically, i would discuss a lot of sasusaku fic lit at length. i have a collection of printed sasusaku fics to prove this. (now if we discuss my love of fics in the rurouni kenshin, princess tutu, nodame cantabile, skip beat! and detective conan/magic kaito fandom i might write a long discourse. omg. i’m so sorry. & if i forgot something, feel free to correct me. ;A:)
i keep rereading these fics and each time i just love them even more. thank you for writing such incredible stories. i swear these stories are what still keep me attached to sasusaku. and i really hope you have some goodies planned for sasusaku month!! :)
and we thank you, for all those wonderful prompts you gave us. (we wouldn't have such interesting topics to write for, if it weren't for your wonderful ideas!) we currently don't have anything planned for ss month for the sasusaku-headcanons tumblr, but we'll be posting for sasusakualter-reality for this month. :D so here, in appreciation (and as it's ss month) a short drabble for you : title: galaxyësummary : she is made of systems and satellites (chp 683)sakura doesn't care, that she was fighting the heavens, waging an impossible divine war she is nothing, a mere ordinary mortal - compared to her companions: the blessed children of fate, reincarnated sons of the heavens, almost-gods that can destroy and rebuild the world with their mere will. it's night, and the sun is unable to help her, and now, her bright crescent is eclipsed by the clouds - so sakura lets the four-faceted jewel on her forehead burn bright, the nuclei of chakra spreading in brilliant green pinpoints and molten pink patterns, the heat searing through her bones, rivaling the boiling fire beneath their feet. her body is reborn into an asterism of erupting novas and clustering nebulae, covering every inch of her with constellations - where in she breathes the same stories of ordinary men who became immortal - the ones who became heroes in untold myths, the warriors in the long epics, the battles in the glorious songs.when obito reaches out, he knows that in his hand, he holds an exploding star.