Jun 29
having the "i pathologically avoid people" personality disorder is fucking weird sometimes bc sometimes a friend or coworker or even complete stranger says something innocuous to me and i'll be thinking about it for hours afterwards like "how do other people respond to that? Do other people put themselves in Situations like that? What if i were meaner? But thats bad? But asserting myself isnt mean. hmmm......."
like some days i really think i just like the idea of socially interacting more than i like actually attempting to experience a social interaction. But I cant just say that to people because folks get weird as fuck about it.
#princely decrees#like deadass theres fr no good way to look at someone and be like 'this isnt really the kind of social interaction i wanted right now and i#feel like this is happening regardless of my attempts to not have this happen'#because then you get looked at real weird for that.#i can hear it like 'well why did you say anything then?' to which the earnest answer is 'i was expecting a different interaction to ensue'