#princescribbler

[princescribbler]

My Needy, KINKY, Regressive Baby Brain: "Oh you're going to the dentist? WEAR A CHASTITY CAGE AND DOUBLE DIAPERS! NOBODY WILL NOTICE AND YOU'RE GONNA FEEL SO BLUSHY AND SILLY AND CUTE AND EMBARRASSED!"

My Normal, Adult RATIONAL Brain: "Or...or we could not?"

HORNY BABY BRAIN: "YOU'RE RIGHT, I FORGOT TO WEAR A PLUG AND BRING A STUFFIE!"

But don't worry, I didn't plug... and no cavities! :P

[princescribbler]

"Diapers, regression, forced regression, maybe some nursing, chastity, unpotty training, hypnosis, light humiliation, worship, orgasm control, diaper dependence, power exchange dynamics, maybe some light cnc but only related to AB/DL and regression topics, etc... you know, pretty normal kinky stuff!"

- Me, accidentally scarring the new kinkster who had never thought of anything beyond "diapers" in his kinks! Hey: If you don't want the answer, don't ask the question!

[princescribbler]

Advice on fleshing out DOM/sub dynamics? My wife (or should I say mommy) and I have been experimenting in the bedroom

(I came clean about my MDLB fantasies and padded fixation during our honeymoon believe it or not)

But she isn't the most "alpha" or confident when it comes to anything so she isn't very used to taking the lead. Though she's expressed time and again how she wants to improve and can see the fun in this possible dynamic.

I'm super thankful she was even open to this to begin with, but I might just be a little bit of a masochist and would like a bit more playful teasing/humiliating in the bedroom. Any tips on how to work through it and/or how I can help her without fully taking the lead from her?

I'm a bit lost 😅

ABSOLUTELY AND AWESOME QUESTION!!!!

I can group my answer into sort of 3 basic concepts/ answers and I think that this will legitimately help. Your issue(s) are focused on not knowing what to do, not being clear on expectations, and both trying to not top from the bottom while still giving someone new to topping/ Dominance a bit of a break, right?

I CAN BREAK THIS INTO 3 CORE ISSUES TO HELP WITH:

1) PRE-SET EXPECTATIONS/ INTENTIONS

2) PREEMPTIVELY MAKE IT EASIER FOR YOU BOTH

3) REWARD EFFORT AND BUILD ON SUCCESS

PRE-SET EXPECTATIONS AND INTENTIONS!

You can't go into this, nor should she, with the idea that you're going to look or act a specific way. You need to be a bit more clear on your expectations, and your partner needs to do the same. Is the goal for you two to have a 'scene' or to adopt it more organically into your daily life? Is she trying to adopt a mommy-domme lifestyle dynamic, or is she into helping you just open up about kink?

You both need to be really clear about your desires and plans so you can act accordingly. If your mommy domme wants to peg, dominate, own, and control you 24/7 vs incorporate cute ABDL and MDLB dynamics every once in a while... very different outcomes. So you need to be honest about what you want, and how you want her to act. Do you want a Dominant Mommy (emphasis on the DOMME) who treats you like a slave and degrades or humiliates you about diapers and regression? Or a sweet and loving and gentle mommy who plays with your stuffies and you in bed to help you fall asleep? Your partner sounds unsure about what to do... and that makes TOTAL sense given they literally don't know about what you're looking for, and you don't know what kind of SUB they might be imagining.

So you need to be clear, plan ahead, be open and give a LOT of examples for your novice partner to follow, and I still also recommend they find blogs, videos, or articles that introduce them at their own pace to this kink. Have them read the "understanding infantilism" blog, or if you focus on diapers, ageplay, forced regression, unpotty training, MDLB, or any specific area of this kink... clarify it so your mommy KNOWS what you're looking for! Even if that means being more open and explicit about your desires than you're used to.

PRE-EMPTIVELY MAKE IT EASIER ON YOURSELVES:

Start slow, following clear plans, and expand from there. What I mean is... if you're with someone who is new and looking for guidance, don't expect them to suddenly adopt this for all areas of life and give them a script of sorts to help them establish confidence. Similarly, be really low on any expectations. Your goal is to set this up so your partner feels successful and learns to get confident and express herself safely. You want her to be more dominant, confident, etc... which feels impossible if they have no idea what to do and are floundering in their own heads!

So start with really basic things that are almost scripted. Like... she wants you to be her subby baby? Set up language that she can use to enforce it and tell her what you want ahead of time. Don't expect her to know what level to hit.... cuz you don't know if she thinks you want to be cruelly domme'd by Hardcore sadist... or if she thinks you want to be spoiled by a domme who never really has to push hard because you're so eager to please!

Start with simple terms to use, start with little events or scenes instead of a lifestyle dynamic, frequently check in both as the submissive and dominant, and go out of your way to build up the confidence and security of the new Dominant Mommy who might need more reassurance and confidence building!

I also strongly suggested above that you give some blogs or stuff that set the tone you want? This is even more true here. Someone not as into the kink as you mount genuinely have no idea how to fulfill your interests... but seeing a blog of similar content, tone, actions, and style sure makes it easier!

So don't have major expectations, communicate your goals, start off small and move on at the new domme's pace, if it's slower than yours, and check in frequently. All of this will make it feel much less high pressure and much more achievable because you're not asking to adopt a 24/7 lifestyle immediately... you're just asking her to call you munchkin, or just asking if she'd be the big spoon while cuddling... you know, small, starter things that build the dynamic and confidence concurrently!

3) REWARD EFFORT AND BUILD ON SUCCESS

No seriously... REWARD any effort on either of your parts. Did your mommy call you babyboy? Tell them how much you like it. Did they bring you water in a sippy cup? Well they put forth an effort: match it and reward them with your littleness, your affection, etc.

The trick in my experience to this is not having unrealistic expectations, recognizing Dominance is a role and about confidence, and building your partner up until that role feels less challenging.

You need to make sure at every stage that you both give positive feedback when something works for you and is fun, or is even just an effort! If you're living with a woman who you want to be your mommy domme and you treat her like she's just a simple roommate... she doesn't see you as that submissive, loving, sweet, dependent little babyboy! But if you make sure to reinforce the times she does act dommy, if you reward her emotionally, and if you consistently and slowly build her confidence in her role, her relationship, and her Dominance, it becomes less of a burden and more of a role she can thrive in and enjoy.

But if you're with someone who doesn't feel like a lifestyle, 24/7 Domme... THAT'S FINE TOO cuz you didn't specifically seek out a 24/7 domme! This is just one very key warning, and sorry to be a Downerwhen i add it, but this is more for general knowledge than to you specifically: Don't expect someone to become what you want now, if you didn't seek that out to begin with!

Instead, reward people for trying to expand and meet new challenges. Make it safe to explore and grow, and try out new things.. this is scary for you, especially acknowledging your kinks and your desires... but you're potentially forgetting your partner needs at least as much reassurance, guidance, and confidence in this as you, because they likely don't have the same kinky underlying desires and needs! So you need to foster, reward, and encourage their willing exploration and curiosity.

So... hopefully that helped and if not and you wanted like really specific terms, or scenes or anything else... give me a shout! As you see, I'm happy to reply at length and give my opinion! Even if I need to also cautiously remind everyone reading this that I'm not a relationship expert or therapist, I'm just a kinky dude sharing my thoughts and experiences!

I hope it helps and you can explore and enjoy!

Good luck, little buddy, and best of luck to your Mommy too. You're both always welcome to chat to me or my own mommy domme love and my betrothed/fiance, @giggle-byte !

And as always, stay happy, stay healthy, and stay kinky!

- Scribbler

[princescribbler]

Momma: "Don't forget to wear thick triple diapers, baby, you don't want a leak!"

Me about to go grocery shopping: "BUT MOMMA! PEOPLE WILL SEE!"

Momma, turned on and enjoying: "Awww, silly baby, nobody can tell you're just a sweet baby crinklebutt! And if they can, they will just assume you're being a very good boy for your momma!"

Me now feeling too little to think of arguing: "WELL FINE... BUT NO PACIFIER!"

Momma, giggling: "Fine, but you'll wear chastity under the diaper the whole time. Mommy needs you to be kept snug and safe for her! What a good boy you are, listening to momma!"

Me, distracted, regressed, aroused, thinking to myself: I'm going to marry momma princess SO FRIGGIN' HARD!!!!!

[princescribbler]

Kinky ABDL Brain: "Happy Saturday! Let's stay little, cuddle stuffies, have extra big cummies for momma, or cage or plug, listen to hypnosis, get all silly and empty headed... Let's dive in to the deep pool of kinky life, and explore the endless pleasures and variety of life as a kinky, extremely excited and desperately horny abdl babyboy switch!!!!!!"

My Vanilla Brain: "IT'S 8AM ON SATURDAY. GO BACK THE FUCK TO SLEEP!"

Kinky ABDL Brain, Quietly: "well... fine... but you'll see me in another hour when you wake up, wet. PRUDE!"

[princescribbler]

Hi. Are you guys poly? Are you living together? Are you married? Your blog has no details. I didn't follow your old blog. Can you tell us who you are and how you got a lifestyle mommy domme?

We're not poly, no. Candidly, I don't think either of us are especially against it, but the nature of our dynamic really prohibits the vast majority of other poly dynamics or relationships, at least in our eyes.

We aren't living together but are engaged. The plan is for me to immigrate within the next year, and be married relatively shortly thereafter.

Who am I? How to best summarize my whole self....I guess I'll just say I'm a nerdy, hairy, opinionated, big, and very kinky guy in my early to mid 30s, living in the Midwestern US! In into abdl, I'm a switch, I've recently been enjoying light chastity play, and almost none of that relates to how I "got" a mommy domme. I think what we both did, because she did as much for our relationship as I did (*cough cough probably more than me cough cough*), was be open to the person as a person, first. We both showed each other friendship, respect, affection, focused on providing support, understanding the human being under the kink, and tried to find out where we were or were not compatible, and adjust our behaviors to emphasize the compatibility and find coping and management strategies for the things we struggle with. Like, I was terrified at the start. Momma was slow, patient, and caring. She sometimes had minor meltdowns when we first got together that were a direct result of me not knowing she needed more attention and respect for her anger. I learned to understand her feelings and not take them personally, she learned my love language(s) and the dynamics of md/lb and dd/lg gave us a useful framework to build upon. So how did I get her? A mix of luck, persistence, patience, affection, natural compatibility, and my momma being saintly. I can't promise that'll be how it works for anyone else... but it worked for me!