In a day of 24 hours, 1,440 minutes, 86,400 seconds, time is never the problem, priority is. It takes just one real reason to reach out...
Even for a single second, yet when that reason fades, 86,400 excuses quietly take its place. In loneliness, we remember who truly matters; in the noise of company, we forget them.
We search for someone to ease our silence, to hold us together in our weakest moments, yet fail to give them even a second, not even a minute, when life feels full again...
And that is the real tragedy, not that time was insufficient, but that we never chose them when it was....
hi!! i love your writing!! currently obsessed with fairy and bucky! would you please make an angst one where bucky hurts fairy unintentionally and she goes for Sam and show a little more of their friendship? (you can decide the end! :) )
priority
18+
In your hour of need, Bucky doesn't show up. What could be more important than you?
Content Warning: Mob!Bucky x Best Friend!Reader, mature themes, subtle threat, angst, distressing themes, protective!sam x reader, jealous!reader, bucky x fem!oc, mention of sex, idiots in love, hurt/comfort. Set pre-wedding!
Series Masterlist
a/n this was another one really far down in my drafts which had been requested aaaages ago and i finally got around to completing!
It isn't often you stay on campus late, but you usually let Bucky know when you do. He doesn't like the idea of you walking home at night alone, so you shoot him a text before heading out onto the dark, cold street.
You're surprised when a few minutes pass and he doesn't reply, since you're used to him immediately dropping everything to take care of you. But you can complain about it to him later. You've walked these streets a thousand times, and you're not at all worried.
Until you hear the sound of a car behind you. You turn to see a black Jeep trailing slowly behind you, moving barely an inch a second.
Immediately, you take out your phone and call Bucky. It rings once, twice, thrice, four times. On the eighth, you realize he isn't gonna pick up. "Fucking prick," You hiss under your breath, speeding up your steps as you attempt to make it out of the small side streets and onto a main road. The car continues to follow you, making you panic. Scrolling through your contacts, you decide to call someone who you aren't sure will pick up, but you try anyway.
"Y/N?" Sam answers almost right away.
"Thank God," You whisper, glancing back at the car. "I need your help."
"What's wrong?" He asks, concern in his voice. "Where are you?"
"I just left campus and I think someone's following me," You say in a hushed, rushed tone. "Are you able to-"
"I'm on my way," Sam cuts you off curtly. "How far from your campus are you? Can you go back?"
"I don't wanna get any closer to their car," You admit, almost jogging at this point.
"That's alright, just keep walking," He says, and you can hear the sound of a car door slamming shut on his side. "Are there any people nearby? Any stores, bars?"
"Nope, nothing," You say with a hint of panic in your voice. "Nothing but closed shutters and empty offices. What do I do?"
"Just relax for me," Sam soothes you while racing through the streets. "I've got you, okay? I'm two minutes away."
"Please hurry," You whisper when you hear the wheels pass over a bump in the road. "I think they're speeding up."
Sam continues to talk you down from your panic while you half-run down the street, until he finally pulls up next to you in his maroon BMW. You could almost cry when you see his familiar car, and immediately rush to get in.
"You okay?" He asks you with a frown.
Nodding, you put your seatbelt on. "Fine, now. Thank you so much for coming," You breathe out, looking ahead at the car that was following you which has come to a complete halt. Sam opens his door and steps out, making your eyes widen. "What are you doing?" You ask him, terrified.
"Stay here," He orders simply before closing the door and locking you in the car.
You watch on in fear as he strides over to the Jeep, your heart racing. Oh, God. He's gonna get shot. They're gonna pull out a gun and shoot him.
He speaks to the driver for a few moments, and you can tell he doesn't look happy. Sam leans closer to the window before muttering something with a dark look. Finally, he slams his hand against the door before turning and storming back over to the car.
"What did they say?" You ask once he's back in.
While he turns on the engine, Sam shakes his head. "Lost tourist. Nothing for you to worry about," He utters bluntly. You know he's lying, but you also know better than to pry any further.
Twenty minutes later, you're sitting in Sam's apartment and eating cookies. It's the first time you've been here, and it's admittedly a nice place. Before tonight, you and Sam had hardly exchanged three sentences, and so you're baffled that he came to your aid. You were pretty sure he hated you with how little attention he paid you.
"Thank you again for picking me up," You say, snuggling into the blanket he gave you. "I know we're not exactly the best of friends, and you probably, rightly so, don't fully trust me just yet, but you still showed up for me tonight. That means a lot. Really."
He gives you a nod. "No problem. A friend of Bucky's is... someone I gotta look out for," He explains with a shrug, before frowning. "Did you call him?"
"Not to make you feel like second best, but he didn't pick up, which is why I called you," You admit, looking down. "I'm surprised he hasn't called back yet. Do you think he's in trouble?"
Knowing exactly where he is, Sam awkwardly rubs the back of his neck. "Uh, he had a meeting," He tells you, feeling a rush of guilt. Of course, his words couldn't be further from the truth - Bucky's with a woman, and they're definitely not discussing business.
"At 11pm?" You wonder with a frown.
"You know what our work is like," He says casually. "Not exactly 9-5."
"Right," You utter, nodding. "Must be some meeting. He never ignores my calls, even when he's talking to someone important."
Saying nothing, Sam busies himself with sending a Bucky a strongly worded text and demanding he come over as soon as he can. You continue eating your cookies, letting your mind wonder as you contemplate what Bucky could possibly be doing. Sure, you've been friends for less than a year, but he's made it clear that he cares about your safety and well-being over most other things. When you think about it some more, you put the pieces together. Sam's odd reaction, the bullshit excuse about being in a meeting - you know Bucky's with a woman, and you could confidently bet your life savings on who she is.
Another twenty minutes pass before Bucky finally arrives, practically breaking the door down in the process. Before he can look for you, Sam grabs him and pulls him to the side with pure fury on his features.
"What are you doing, Wilson?" Bucky huffs, stressed out and irritated.
"You swore you wouldn't be reckless," Sam grumbles. "When we bring someone into this life, we look the fuck after them."
"What happened?" Bucky asks, his heart racing as he assumes the worst. "Is she okay?"
With a huff, Sam lets go of him. "She's fine," He states. "Ogilvy's men were following her."
"They've seen her around you and wanted to make sure she was trustworthy, on your behalf," Sam says bitterly. "Apparently, they do so with all your associates."
"What? Why?" Bucky spits, frowning.
"I never asked him to do that," Bucky mutters, fists clenched at his side at the thought of someone watching you. Stalking you.
"I know that," Sam points out with a scoff. "I told them to back off and that if they ever go near her again, I'll break their legs myself."
Placing a hand on his shoulder, Bucky nods. "Thank you, Sam," He says, entirely grateful that he could be there for you when Bucky wasn't.
"Yeah," Sam replies shortly, stepping back with a nod towards the living room. "Go ahead, man. Get your girl."
You're curled up on the couch when Bucky walks in. Sitting up, you wait for him to speak.
"Are you okay?" He asks you as he walks further into the room, a mixture of concern and nervousness on his face. It's not a look you're used to seeing, but you're also not used to him upsetting you.
"Yep," Is your short answer.
Bucky takes in a breath, deciding to think carefully before he continues. "I'm sorry," He lands on saying. "I- I fucked up. I shouldn't have ignored your call."
"I know you were with her," You reveal bluntly, unable to pretend you're okay with it.
Rubbing his face, Bucky sits on the other couch. "She came over unexpectedly," He claims.
"I don't care," You say with a frown, disliking the way he's acting as though he had no choice but to host her in his home, as though it's normal for him to have guests over. "I needed you tonight."
"I know, and-"
"I don't ask for much," You remind him. "In fact, there's nothing else I ask for, besides your protection."
He closes his eyes and sighs, looking down. "Fairy-"
"You knew what bringing me into your life would mean for me," You say, realizing how hurt you are the more you speak. "And I did too, I admit, but we had a deal. I'd put up with the danger and the risk, if you prioritized my safety. If you prioritized me."
He says nothing.
"I didn't feel like a priority tonight," You tell him, feeling your nose begin to tingle as your eyes sting. "And for what? That fuckin' sadist who wants to take over your empire? I'd understand if it was important, but you left me in possible danger just to fuck her?"
His jaw clenches and his face pales. "Fairy-"
"Can you just leave me alone?" You cut him off again, something neither of you are used to. "I need to think."
Once again, he looks nervous. "About what?" He asks, wondering if it's possible you're about to leave his life.
"About this friendship," You elaborate with a shrug. "Maybe I'm being naive, expecting someone like you to put me first when I'm not even your..."
He raises a brow when you stop mid-sentence. "Not even my what?" He prods.
Irritated and with an achy heart, you look away from him. "Whatever, James. I don't wanna talk to you right now," You mumble.
Bucky stands up and walks over to you, making you shrink back. Looking down at you, he furrows his brows together. "I fucked up tonight. I know that. I told you you'd always be safe with me, and I broke that promise. It's my fault you were being followed, and I wasn't there to look after you. To let you know that you were alright. That nobody can ever, ever hurt you," He says with a firm voice. "And I am so sorry. I slipped up, and... you could've been hurt."
"Just go," You whisper, refusing to look up at him.
To your surprise, he does as you say. With a kiss to your forehead, Bucky leaves the room, granting you the space you asked for.
His words play on repeat in your head and trigger the lock on the little box of anxiety you've been doing your best to keep tightly closed, and you can't hold it in any longer. Warm tears stream down your face and you clutch onto the pillow in your lap. By the time Sam walks back into the room, you're sobbing.
"C'mere," He mumbles, wrapping his arms around you. "I've got you. I'm here."
"I thought they were gonna kill me," You finally admit, unable to keep up the act that you're doing absolutely fine. You're not fearless like the other people Bucky surrounds himself with. You're not unbreakable, and you're not ready to die. It's been almost a year since you met Bucky, and you're still not used to the cut-throat lifestyle, no matter how much you act like you are.
Sam strokes your hair, gently rocking you back and forth. This isn't his forte; he's usually the one doing Bucky's dirty work, not comforting the women he hurts.
"I was terrified," You go on to say, tightly holding onto him. "I- I just wasn't ready. Wasn't prepared to feel like that, and it's been a long day-"
"You don't have to explain yourself. It was a scary situation," Sam validates you, rubbing your back. "And you did really fucking well to keep calm and keep moving. Anyone else would've frozen up, or confronted them. You did the smart thing. The right thing."
Letting out a shaky breath, you nod.
"But you know what to do next time?" He asks with a quirked brow.
"Protect myself?" You suggest with a frown. "Can you teach me?"
He leans in closer and glares. "You don't stay on campus past 9pm, you little dumbass. Understand me?"
Laughing, you nod. "Yes, Sir."
"I mean it. Who the fuck studies until almost midnight?" He asks incredulously.
"I have a test on Friday!" You explain.
"I don't give a fuck; you study until 6, then you go home and have a nice warm meal," Sam orders you, before his face drops. "Have you even eaten?"
You bite your lip and wince, preparing for his rage. "I... had some candy-"
"You're just asking for me to beat your ass, aren't you? Candy?" He scoffs, before standing up. "Lucky for you, I have leftovers from dinner."
"Wait!" You call out, standing up. "Will you, though?"
He narrows his eyes. "Will I what?"
"You know, teach me what to do in those situations," You elaborate timidly. "I already know judo, so I'm not a total beginner."
"You already know what to do," Sam says bluntly. "You call me."
"Well, what if you're busy?" You ask him. "I'm in this shit now, Sam, and there's no going back. You and I both know I need to know my way around a gun."
He glares at you for a few moments before relaxing his face and sighing. "Sit your ass down, eat some food, and get some sleep," He orders, somehow knowing that you were already planning on staying the night because there's no way you're spending tonight alone. "And then, maybe, I'll think about it."
With a grin, you wrap your arms around him. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" You exclaim giddily.
He huffs, trying his best not to smile. "Whatever, dumbass. You owe me one."
Once he disappears to the kitchen, you stretch your arms out and decide to wash up. When you leave the living room, though, you see Bucky sitting at the bottom of the stairs, dejection in his eyes.
With a sigh, you sit next to him, nudging his arm. "Hi," You say almost inaudibly.
He rests his head on your shoulder. "I'm sorry," He whispers.
Your eyes fill with tears immediately once again. "It's not your fault," You whisper back.
"It is," He argues. "That could've been anyone following you tonight. Could've been fucking Fisk."
"Well, it wasn't," You point out.
"It could have been," He reiterates. "You were right. I knew what bringing you into this life would mean. I knew that having you by my side came with a duty. A responsibility."
"I'm not a kid-"
"But you are my responsibility," He says stubbornly. "I can't put you at risk and then let you down when you need me most. Tonight might've been a fluke, but what about tomorrow? What if it is Fisk tomorrow?"
You place your hand in his, stroking the back with your thumb.
"You're my fairy. Mine," He utters, snaking his arm around your waist and pulling you closer. "You mean so much more to me than anyone and anything else. Even Ma loves you, and she hates everyone. You're too special for me to be making stupid fuckin' mistakes, over what? A quick fuck?"
"Was it at least worth it?" You wonder.
"Absolutely not," He confirms. "Nobody ever is. Not since I met you."
Ignoring the butterflies in your stomach, you shake your head, refusing to take his words seriously. You made a deal the day you met him to be just friends, and you're determined to stick to it.
"I'm sorry, fairy," Bucky says for the seemingly hundredth time. "I love you. Never again."
You look up into his eyes and you know he's telling the truth. "You're never gonna fuck anyone, ever again?"
His eyes widen and a fear fills them. "I didn't say that-"
"I'm kidding, idiot," You snort, nudging his shoulder harder.
"I'm never ignoring you again," He clarifies with a smile. "You're my number one priority. Always."
"Forever?"
"And ever after."
"Sounds like a fairytale," You say with a soft laugh.
"Well, you are a fairy," He points out matter-of-factly. "And I do look like Prince Charming."
"Dinner's ready, idiots," Sam calls out, poking his head out of the kitchen door.
"And there's the grumpy old troll," Bucky mutters with a snort.
"Hey - you wanna eat, or not?" Sam asks him with a threatening glare.
You stand up to your feet and smile widely, turning back to Bucky. "Hey, Jamie, Sam said he's gonna teach me how to use a gun," You say excitedly.
Raising a brow, Bucky gets up to his feet. "Is he, now?" He asks, shooting an unreadable look towards Sam who simply shrugs.
"Someone's gotta do it," He says before leaving again.
With a grin, you take Bucky's hand. "Come on, Prince Charming. I'm hungry," You say, pulling him with you into the kitchen.
He follows behind you, giving your kiss a cheek as you enter the room, and doing his best to ignore the look on Sam's face while doing so. Bucky doesn't care about how soft he is around you, and he doesn't care if his men know it. You may be his weakness, but you don't make him weak. He'll proudly treat you with affection and gentleness, and anyone who dares question or mock him for it doesn't get the chance to do so again.
So, he pulls you onto his lap, and he lets you feed him, and he doesn't care. Because you're his fairy. His number one priority.
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