#procrastinating hobbies and pastimes?.. really?

[quixotic9999999999]

music is kinda exhausting sometimes. I want to listen to way more stuff than I physically can and then I end up listening to nothing at all for days..

[ronweasleysslut]

Slots 🎰 - Shipping game. Give me a fandom, gender preference, and 3-6 facts about you and i’ll ship you with a character from that fandom.

saige i'm never gonna get over how iconic this celebration is.

but for facts abt me <3

— i am the most pisces person ever. i cry all the time. i know what people are thinking without them saying anything. i'm one of those people that feels their emotions and others super strongly.

— i love music. literally music is how i get through life. and i love it all. seriously.

— i'm always drinking a latte or a cup of tea. they make me feel so lovely and mysterious lmao.

— i'm always trying new things. from cheerleading to learning to knit... i've done it all. i think i've tried every hobby. so i never have to say i only have one, i have them all.

— finally i really really love procrastinating. favorite pastime lmao.

Thank you my love i am so happy with how it came out and i love that everyone else loves it too!

I ship you with…

Ron Weasley!

Here me out i feel as if he is a man who doesn’t know how to explain how he’s feeling very well, which at the end of the day can cause for communication problems. He’s a pisces as well so the relationship would be calm and nurturing. I know that man’s homework is always late so essentially y’all would procrastinate together. I would see your typical hanging out done by listening to music in his room while you either cuddle and nap or you working on one of your 5973727 hobbies and him watching quidditch highlights of some kind.

[shinidamachu]

15 Questions to Get to Know me Better

1. What is your favorite food and beverage?

Catupiry and chicken pizza with Coca-Cola (or Guaraná Antarctica, I keep going back and forth between the two). Any kind of pasta (or carbs, really). I’m also a salty, sour and spicy food enthusiast.

2. What is currently your favorite fandom?

Inuyasha. I know it sounds contradictory, considering how unhinged the fandom has been since the sequel was annouced. And I debated for good five minutes if I should just answer “Inukag” instead, because it’s the part of the fandom I engage with the most.

But despite how much the fandom has changed (not for the better) there are other aspects of it, other than Inukag, that I really love, so it didn’t feel right to reduce it to Inukag, even though they are the main reason I’m here.

The Inuyasha fandom was the first I wrote fanfiction for. And I love the events we create, the fanworks, the friends I made here. From all the fandoms I’ve been a part of, it was by far the one that gave me more reasons to leave but at the same time it was the one I simply couldn’t quit.

3. What shows are you currently watching?

None. Professional life has been overwhelming and I’m not really in the place to start a new show, so I just rewatch the ones I love. Again. For comfort and white noise. Today was Jane The Virgin day. 

I’m also trying to catch up with the ones that are still running, like Brooklyn Nine-Nine (this new season is on fire, by the way). The last “new” show I started was Community and I was loving it. Hope to get back to it soon and finish the whole thing.

4. What’s your strength?

Interesting question. Gotta go with kindness for this one. At least that’s what I try to be.

5. What’s your weakness?

Oh, boy. Where to begin? I’m egocentric. I’m anxious. I have the attention spam of a golden fish. I tend to avoid conflict at all costs and sometimes people walk all over me for it. I’m a procrastinator who is also somehow a perfectionist. Low self steem, intimacy issues: you pick one.

6. Pet peeves?

Well, I feel like people who lick their fingers to turn over a page are attacking me, personally, and should all rot in jail. They don’t belong in society and never will.

7. What’s your ideal type?

Must make me laugh, must see me at my worst and still want to be with me. I love being on my own, so my ideal type is someone I enjoy being around as much as I enjoy being by myself. Or even more. Also, kids are a deal breaker because I don’t want any. And our political instances have got to align, at least in some key issues.

8. The last food you ate?

Cuscuz and scrambled eggs, dinner of the champions.

9. Favorite animes?

Inuyasha

Yu-Gi-Oh!

Dragon Ball

Pokemon

I know! I’m pretty basic, anime wise. And chances are I’m gonna keep it that way for now.

10. Regular pastimes or hobbies?

Writing, reading, blaming capitalism for all of my problems.

11. Favorite characters?

Dude. It’s impossible to list everyone. I’ll keep it simple and stick with the characters I’m currently more invested in.

Inuyasha and Kagome.

Zuko and Katara.

12. All-time favorite show?

A hard one, but the answer couldn’t be different. I have yet to watch something better than The Good Place. 

There’s no such thing as perfection, especially when it comes to tv shows, but to me it is the one that gets closer.

It was both heartbreaking and heartwarming. Funny, fresh, beautifully written. The cast was talented and diverse. The characters were unique, relatable and flawed. Their development was substancial and satisfatory, not only as individuals but also with each other.

I keep coming back to it whenever I need comfort. Or to restaure my faith in humanity. I have no doubt we witnessed the creation of a timeless, iconic show.

13. What are you doing right now?

Listening to music, replying to this ask game and trying to get some work done.

14. How are you?

Ordinarily okay. Like, as okay as one can be as a 24 years old in this time and place. Everything feels urgent and unimportant, hopeful and hopeless at the same time. It’s like I’m watching my life pass by as I wait for it to click together.

Physically, I’m just getting over a little bit of a cold. Mentally, I like to think I’m doing fine. Totally clueless, yes, but I’m really trying to do my thing and become the person I aspire to be. 

There are so many things to be grateful for, even if not everything is how I wished it was. I’m just trying to focus on the good for now.

15. Favorite rest time activities?

Sleeping after daydreaming about super vivid scenarios, mostly about fictional characters, that will either never happen or leave me alone unless I write them down. Going to the beach. Listening to music. Watching movies, tv shows or football games. Haging out with my family. Scrooling through Tumblr. Check out number 10 for more.

@higurashi-shrine​ this got really long and really personal, so I just decided to make my own post rather than pilling up on the original. Hope it’s cool. And thank you so much for tagging me. I loved reading your replies!

ANYONE WHO HAS READ IT THIS FAR: YOU ARE NOW OFFICIALLY TAGGED TO REPLY THIS GAME YOURSELF. I MEAN IT. TAG ME SO I CAN READ YOUR REPLIES AND GET TO KNOW YOU BETTER!

[arcade-conspiracy]

Heyo! Can I request a BNHA matchup? One platonic, one romantic? I’m 19, non-binary, and pan. I’m definitely a procrastinator but always manage to get my work done on time (miraculously). Hobbies include music (listening and playing/singing), reading (mysteries and action mostly), and sleeping. I’m an introvert but am also highkey crazy when I come out of my shell and my love language is probably quality time and acts of service when receiving, but I generally give words of affirmation and physical touch. Thanks!

I platonically match you with,,,

Hitoshi Shinsou!

At first glance, you two are both just tired introverts but anyone that knows of your friendship knows most days it’s not that simple

Maybe not in general energy, but you two can get up to some dumb shit

Think walking around outside listening to loud music past dark, not exactly illegal or anything, just,, slightly inconvenient to others lolz 

Contrary to what I just said, you probably end up napping together a lot as well

It’s mostly unintentional, but one of you will fall asleep, so the other eventually ends up doing the same

You always say your hang outs won’t end up like that, but that tends to be a lie

He has a killer music taste, so there’s a constant exchange of playlists and albums

Will probably never bring up those suggestions again, though, because he doesn’t expect you to actually listen to them. He always listens to whatever you may tell him to listen to, though!

He also is super fond of physical mixtapes, so if he knows you have a way to play them, he will in fact be making you multiple CDs with music he thinks you will like

The type of friend you can feel comfortable doing nothing with

Just sitting in a room together doing seperate things, ocassionally having small conversations

In conclusion: The type of friendship that you never expected to work, but is now the only person you hang out with

I romantically match you with,,,

Tamaki Amajiki!

He tends to attract more energetic people into his life, which means it’s no real surprise when you show up in it

He may be one of the least up beat people there is, but he appreciates any bit of excitement you bring

Loves hearing you sing. He finds it incredibly calming and comforting to know it’s you who’s singing

He doesn’t really care what genre or song you’re singing or playing, honestly, he just likes hearing it

He never really shows affection outwardly, as that can be overwhelming for him, so he tends to do small things here and there instead

Stuff like getting you snacks you like, leaving cute notes in your bag, or picking up something he knows youve been needing

The one time he got the courage to plan a date himself, he took you to a café and a book store

He assumed it’d be a nice quiet place to talk and you’d mentioned you liked reading at some point so,, that seemed like it could be a good choice!

Speaking of reading, he doesn’t read much, but he does love hearing about what you’re reading!

Honestly, listening to others speak isn’t exactly his favorite pastime, but he adores hearing you talk about anything, especially if it’s something you’re passionate about

That also means he is definitely down to hear you ramble about music, or literally anything, at this point he just likes hearing your voice

He can be quite cuddly if comfortable with someone, so he would for sure trust you enough to cuddle with him

He is incredibly touch starved, so uhhh be careful there lolz 

In conclusion: Sun and moon relationship that on the surface looks like a moon and stars relationship,,, does that make sense?

[kat-writes-haikyuu]

Matchup Exchange

The amazing @todorokis-yn has agreed to do a matchup exchange with me!

- i have an rbf so a lot of people tell me they were intimidated by me at first, esp bc they think i’m cool (but i truly am not. legit not even joking lmfao) but once they get to know me i’m super warm! i’m a good listener & also really understanding

- i’m super thoughtful! sometimes to a fault bc i think/worry too much about how my words/actions might affect other people, but in general i’m always looking out for my friends & offering to do things for them bc it’s how i show that i care

- most definitely an ambivert. i don’t mind going out (if i don’t look like a gremlin that day) but going out too many times in a week both drains my energy & makes me feel SUPER guilty bc i’m a workaholic so i get hella anxious if i’m not doing work or being productive lol. but i also like having my own time to watch anime, be a bum, & write matchups haha

- i’m really down-to-earth. i think one of my biggest pet peeves are when people are arrogant so i wish they’d be more humble, but bc i’m so used to putting myself down i really struggle with my confidence & always feel like i’m not good enough lol rip

- my sense of humor can be pretty dry & sarcastic but i’m also told i radiate chaotic energy lol. i don’t mind looking dumb & saying stupid stuff if it means making people laugh, but i can be pretty witty!

- my heart is so big. like legit i care so much about other people but it’s also kind of easy to take advantage of me LOL. i’m trying not to take any more bullshit after being traumatized so many times but it just doesn’t change my caring nature. my friends & family are the most important people to me! i’m often told that i inspire other people to care for their loved ones as best as they can :’D

- i’m pretty well-rounded in terms of academics, social life, & personal life! i’m super ambitious but also a perfectionist to a fault. it’s a bit of a juxtaposition but i procrastinate doing certain things bc i feel like i won’t be good at it, when deep down i know the only way to get better is to DO it & practice. idk i beat myself up a lot & just never give myself a break. i’m super anxious & also a people-pleaser; i’m stubborn but will usually let people win bc i hate conflict lmao

- some of my hobbies include playing piano, dancing, & singing! i’m a very musical person & dance is the only form of exercise i’ll do lol. i love love LOVE going to cafes & coffee shops to do work, & i also love binge watching anime by myself or with friends. i’m a junk food fanatic & idk just overall pretty wholesome even though i don’t look like it lol.

I would match you with...

Kuroo!!

So, for starters, he would not mind your RBF, and will tell you that you are as cool as everyone thinks you are which you definitely are, and you can’t convince me otherwise

He would love that you have a huge heart, as he himself has a pretty kind heart

Kuroo would look out for you and make sure that no one will EVER take advantage of you again

He believes that you are the most kindhearted and inspiring person ever!

He admires how careful you are when talking to people, but would tell you that you don’t have to worry about saying anything wrong!

Kuroo understands that going out too many times may be draining for you, being friends with Kenma and all, but he loves that you are open to going out!

When you get anxious about not doing work, Kuroo will reassure you that you can relax, and don’t have to work all the time!

He will watch anime with you, and just bum around with you, if you are okay with him being there

He doesn’t need to constantly be doing something, just being with you is enough for him

Kuroo will always lift you up when you bring yourself down, as he doesn't understand how someone so incredible doesn’t see how amazing they are

Kuroo radiates chaotic energy himself, and you would join him and Bokuto in the chaos they create

He finds your sarcastic and dry humor hilarious 

He understands that you hate conflict, but he will encourage you to hold your ground and fight a bit more, as he always strives to win

Kuroo loves watching you dance, and will ask you to teach him

One of his favorite pastimes is listening to you sing and play the piano

He loves your voice, and thinks that you are an angel on earth!

Cafe dates are very common! He loves hearing about your day, or if your working, he loves the cute face you make when you’re concentrating 

When you don’t want to go out you guys would get junk food and binge whatever anime you want!

Thank you so much for doing this with me! I had so much fun writing this, and I hope its good! Have a wonderful day!

[luvdsc]

tag games ;

tagging :: @eggyukhei ; @jaemericano ; @aqiaquas ; @forehead-enthusiast ; @choerrypuffs ; @latetaektalk ; @winetae ; @taeyongtime ; @nochanchu 🌼

—

TAG GAME ONE

tagged by :: @njmin thank you, lovebug! ✨

— tell me the first song that made you stan your current fave group and why did your faves attract you so much?

omg ok it was april 2014, and I was procrastinating on homework and scrolling through youtube. shinee’s lucifer mv was recommended for some reason, and I was intrigued, so I clicked on it. From there, it just spiraled out of control. I was blown away like there’s this one dance move where they all lined up and taemin does this hand motion so fluidly and I was like “this is it.” More shinee mvs were recommended after I clicked that one, so I kept going and watching all the other ones until I watched them all. Their music is just so different and unique, like even after all this time, I can’t find another kpop group who mimics the music style of shinee. and all their solos are absolutely god tier, too!!! they really are gonna be my first and last kpop group. shinee withstood through my stan eras for other groups. I don’t think I’ll ever stop being their fan.

I also found snsd through shinee because their mvs were recommended after I clicked lucifer too. the first one I saw is the iconic gee. taeyeon stood out to me in those mvs. her voice is so distinct, and I’ve been a fan of her ever since. She didn’t have a solo then, but I searched up all her drama osts, song features, everything because I loved her voice so much even back then. so yeah, taeyeon and shinee will forever be my faves, and I love them a lot 💓

TAG GAME TWO

tagged by :: @latetaektalk thank you, linh !! 💖

rule :: answer the ten questions and write your own!

— how are you today?

I’m doing really good! I’m enjoying my summer, and my day is pretty lax. I’ve been facetiming friends, watching chopped, making banh bao with my mom, and doing my daily cardio ✨

— what book has had the biggest impact on your life?

the princess knight by cornelia funke. my elementary school did this thing where your parents can buy a book to donate to the school library under your name for your birthday. this was the book my sister chose for me when I was in kindergarten. I loved that book; I borrowed it so many times and kept rereading it. It’s a children’s picture book about a princess who secretly learns how to joust. the king tries to give her hand in marriage to the knight who wins the competition, but she defeats them all and chooses to marry the gardener’s son who she loves 💕

— what is something you think everybody should have done once in their life?

Travel. There’s just something so wonderful about going to a new place, whether that’s halfway across the world or just the town a few states over. It’s a lovely feeling embarking on an adventure to a place unknown to you where you can meet new people, try new foods even if it’s just a random dish at a restaurant you’ve never been to, and make memories with strangers that no one back home ever has to know about. There’s just something intriguing about being able to go somewhere else and be someone else for an hour or a day or a week before you return back home.

— what story are you the most proud of and why?

on my previous blog, I wrote a fic called the universe of us, and it’s 21k+ wc. I poured my blood, sweat, and tears into that fic, and although I can’t read it now without cringing, I really am super proud of myself for pulling through and writing that. The concept of it was unique, in my opinion, and I would love to rewrite it someday! 💫

on this blog, I am most proud of the dumbing down of love. that fic is personal to me because it is literally comprised of my college experiences in written format and the characters embody my friends. I wrote that over the span of 3-4 nights, and that’s the fastest I’ve ever written a fic of that length. the words just flowed so easily for that fic, and the quesadilla scene was the first thing I wrote, and I’m quite proud of that scene!! 💓

— what has made you really happy recently?

I graduated uni!!!!! 💛💛

— what is the first thing you want to do after this whole pandemic is over and it’s safe to go out again?

I want to eat sushi LOL I haven’t had it in four months, and I’m craving it so badly.... I also want to go out with my friends again! I miss being able to see them everyday and our late night shenanigans ):

— if you had to make a soundtrack/playlist based on your life, how would you call it and which songs would you include?

honestly, these are just a bunch of my favorite songs throughout my entire life. some of them don’t relate to me personally, but I remember listening them on repeat, and I still know all the lyrics to them 💘

title: cue the soundtrack of my life

songs: complicated ⋆ avril lavigne ⋮ check yes, juliet ⋆ we the kings ⋮ the way i loved you ⋆ taylor swift ⋮ a daydream away ⋆ all time low ⋮ that’s what you get ⋆ paramore ⋮ i won’t give up ⋆ jason mraz ⋮ holy ground ⋆ taylor swift ⋮ lucifer ⋆ shinee ⋮ don’t go ⋆ exo m ⋮ 1000 years ⋆ shinee ⋮ breathe ⋆ taeyeon & jonghyun ⋮ coffee ⋆ bts ⋮ you are in love ⋆ taylor swift ⋮ walk you home ⋆ nct dream ⋮ i ⋆ taeyeon ⋮ tell me what to do ⋆ shinee ⋮ mad city ⋆ nct 127 ⋮ gravity ⋆ taeyeon ⋮ blueprint ⋆ stray kids

— what is your favourite breakfast food?

omg it’s this one dish that I order every time I go to the diner near my university, and it’s a smoked salmon eggs benedict with hollandaise sauce and hash browns 🤩🤩

— how did you get into writing and is it something you would like to do as your job?

I’ve always enjoyed writing, and my teachers sent me to the young authors’ faire every year from kindergarten to 8th grade. You don’t really get to write creative stories in class when you’re older though, and I stumbled upon fanfiction, and here we are. It’s not something I want to do as my job though. Writing is simply a fun pastime and hobby for me!! If I was forced to write or profit off of it, then that’d take fun out of it ):

— did you remember to drink enough water today?

yes, I did!! I make sure to drink 6-8 large cups of water a day :’) stay hydrated!!! 🤍

my questions for you:

what’s your favorite jelly bean flavor?

if you hated your child, what name would you give them?

do you pour cereal first or milk first?

do you like pineapple on your pizza?

if you could be a celebrity for the day, who would you be and why?

what are three dealbreakers for you in a relationship?

what’s your favorite word and why?

would you rather punch your ult bias in the face full force or lick the porta potty that hasn’t been cleaned after Coachella weekend?

which song(s) would you cut out from nct’s discography?

what’s the most unique/interesting food you’ve ever eaten?

TAG GAME THREE

tagged by :: @pwarkhans ty, sweetpea! 🌸

rule :: bold the statements that apply to you, italicize your aspirations, then tag nine people.

AIR ༉⋆͙̈

i have small hands / i love the night sky / i watch animals and birds when i pass them by / i drink herbal tea / i wake to see the dawn / the smell of dust is comforting / i’m valued for being wise / i prefer books to music / i meditate / i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

FIRE ༉⋆͙̈

i don’t have straight hair / i like to wear ripped jeans and overalls / i play an organized sport / i love dogs / i am not afraid of adventure / i love to talk to strangers / i always try new foods / i enjoy road trips / summer is my favorite season / my radio is always playing

WATER ༉⋆͙̈

i wear bracelets on my wrists / i love the bustle of the city / i have more than one set of piercings / i read poetry / i love the sound of a thunderstorm / i want to travel the world / i sleep past midday most days / i love simply lit dinners and fluorescent signs / i rewatch kids shows out of nostalgia / i see emotions in colors not words

EARTH ༉⋆͙̈

i wear glasses or contacts / i enjoy doing the laundry / i am a vegetarian or vegan / i have an excellent sense of time / my humor is very cheerful / i am a valued advisor to my friends / i believe in true love / i love this chill of mountain air / i’m always listening to music / i am highly trusted by the people in my life

AETHER ༉⋆͙̈

i go without makeup in my daily life / i make my own artwork / i keep on track of my tasks and time / i always know true north / i see beauty in everything / i can always smell flowers / i smile at everyone i pass by / i always fear history repeating itself / i have recovered from a mental disorder / i can love unconditionally

[killerqueenwidow]

Discover the Animal in You!

FOX CHARACTERISTICS: Autonomous • Generous • Creative • Flirtatious • Procrastinating SCIENTIFIC NAME: Vulpes vulpes COLLECTIVE TERM: A skulk of foxes

THE ASTUTE FOX

The fox personality is very much a creature of the night and, along with its dog relatives, is among the most gregarious of the carnivores. These agile-minded personalities are always active and -- although they never go out of their way to harm others -- have developed an unfair reputation for slyness and manipulation. The female of the species is called a vixen for good reason: with a sharp mind and equally sharp tongue, it’s best to stay on her good side, especially since she’s like to rise to the top of her chosen field.

CHARMING CARNIVORES

Appealing, cerebral and of average size, the fox is a close relative of both the wolf and dog personalities and displays the typical canine qualities of loyalty, passion and creativity. Largely misunderstood to be a shy, retreating individual, it's the fox's stature as a small carnivore that defines its survival strategy. Because it cannot succeed using brute force alone, the fox must rely on its sharp mind and engaging personality to garner resources. Because it spends so much time in its head -- giving the impression that it's trying to outsmart everyone – the fox isn’t surprised that others find its intellectual pursuits quite intimidating (and often annoying).

Foxes are fussy eaters and, with an appreciation for the finer things in life, demand quality in entertainment, food, and friends. Their love of exploration dovetails with their passion for overcoming challenges, which is why foxes are often found mountain climbing or journeying to exotic, forbidden places.

FOXES CAN BE SUBTLE

Flamboyance is not the fox's style; it prefers to remain inconspicuous in a small, cozy house, which is usually organized and neat.   Choosing subtlety and cunning over brute strength, they are unquestionably hunter personalities and are usually in good physical shape and perform well in pastimes that challenge both mind and body.

Foxes are typically successful in the workplace, but their competitiveness and ambition sometimes make coworkers feel belittled. While they would never deliberately take advantage of others, their single-mindedness often blinds them to the feelings of others. Foxes thrive when running their own businesses, but will usually seek a trusted partner in these ventures. Although they prefer consensus in partnership decisions, they usually dominate discussions and steer plans to reflect their own agenda. Competent in a wide range of fields, foxes are particularly well suited for a career as computer programmers, lawyers, doctors or politicians.

FOXES IN THE WILD

Foxes are closely related to dogs and jackals and comprise a number of distinct species; each with its unique range. Assessing the worldwide population of foxes is difficult as these animals mainly go about their business at night and are skilled at staying out of sight, although they sometimes fall prey to coyotes and wolves. Today its main enemy is man... and because of its tree-climbing habit, it is an easy animal to trap, although most species are not considered endangered.  During the day, foxes rest in thick brush or in the hollows of tree.  The fox is the only member of the canine family to routinely climb trees and often escapes danger by running up the trunk of a sturdy tree and navigating overhanging branches.

Foxes are not particularly fast runners, nor do they have the endurance for long chases... relying instead on their keen intelligence to make their living.

CAREERS & HOBBIES

Computer programmer • Lawyer • Doctor • Advertising Chess • Gambling • Debating • Jeopardy

LOVE & FRIENDSHIP

As lovers, foxes are passionate and inventive, with their agile minds and bodies leading to exciting romps. Yet, because foxes are generally uncomfortable with the idea of emotional neediness, they rely on their partners to generate the romance and safe harbor.

Despite their roguish reputations, foxes are quite discerning in their choice of mates. They are particularly attracted to the creativity and gumption of eagles, zebras and wild dogs... creatures with which they are physically and temperamentally well -matched. Foxes should avoid wildcats and tigers, however, for while these aggressive carnivores provide immediate carnal gratification, their feline characteristics clash with the fox's canine essence.

Beneath its even-handed exterior is a deeply emotional core that the fox keeps well-guarded. Lovers quickly realize that the fox prefers nurturing to being nurtured, which is really just a fox ploy to avoid intimacy... a fox will never reveal its vulnerabilities unless it finds a mate who it intellectually respects, and emotionally trusts.

Tagged By: @the-mjolnir-owner

Tagging: WHOEVER WANTS TO DO IT!

[pinesconessecrets]

For @astronycto! Have some fluffy pinescone goodness to keep you warm during these cold winter months ;)

According to Greg, Wirt is a habitual procrastinator. If Wirt had argued when that inaccurate assessment of his character was announced- Which he didn’t, because he’s recently been trying to let small things slide. He’s been practicing this so that when something big happens, his reaction can be taken at least somewhat seriously. Unfortunately, in this attempt of escaping his dramatic label, his pushover one has been rewritten in bolded lettering.

But, if he had argued, he would have pointed out that he has not procrastinated once in his entire lifetime, ever. Does Wirt sometimes spend more time planning and fleshing out a project than he does actually doing said project? Yes. Always, in fact.

This is because meticulously perfecting every little detail of an assignment, or a task, or- or a proposal , if you will, is by absolutely no means on the same level as procrastinating. It’s on the opposite end of the scale, really; A commendable pastime rather than a pathetic one.

It’s this exact line of logic that has led Wirt to devoting over six months of his life devising the right way to ask Dipper Pines to go on a date with him.

The door to his room abruptly starts to open, sending Wirt into an unproductive spiral of full blown panic.

He should be trying to make a lightspeed decision of whether or not to attempt to hide the countless papers covered in humiliating plans of romantic seduction that surround him on his bed. Or grab his wand, in case of the rare event of him remembering a useful spell. Jump out the window, maybe. Instead, he hyperventilates and sits paralyzed atop of his comforter.

“Woof,” Sarah expresses upon her rebellious and uninvited entry into his dorm, “Getting an early start on your homework? That’s not like you.”

Wirt suavely wheezes in response.

“Yeah, yeah. You’ve given me the speech before,” She rolls her eyes, plopping down on the bed across from him and sending parchment flying, “ No girls in the boys dormitories, it’s against the school rules, blah blah, I don’t want people to think things. I hate to be the one to break this to you dude, but in order for people to assume that we’re hooking up, they’d have to believe that you’re straight. No one’s thought that since we were eleven.”

Wirt’s temples grow damp as Sarah’s gaze lands on one of the now crumpled papers by her crossed legs, “I could love a woman.”

She thankfully looks up at that, eyebrows waggling, “But could you love her right ?”

He swallows, fidgeting with the quill between his fingers, “Was… Was that innuendo?”

“You’re starting to catch on,” She grins, leaning in Wirt’s direction to deliver what he guesses to be a pat on his knee or some sort of friendly gesture to that effect.

He guesses wrong, of course, because Lady Luck has never sided with him once and he should really have learned that lesson by now-

Sarah stealthily snatches up one of the papers closest to him and darts over to the far side of his room, eyes scanning the page with a fierce quickness.

With his face ablaze, Wirt emits a short cry of outrage, jumping to his feet and chasing her down with long strides that are the one positive thing his gangly legs are dependable for. He tears the paper out of her villainous clutches, manners be damned, and aims an affronted look her way.

“Are they on the quidditch team?” She questions, her words stumbling over each other in their rush to get out before Wirt can admonish the unspeakably rude behavior.

“What?” He blurts, voice reaching an embarrassingly high pitch that he will never admit to being capable of.

“Quidditch,” She repeats, expression so suddenly somber that Wirt can’t help but momentarily forget his anger, “Do they play?”

He blinks, rapidly, “ Um. They- No-”

Sarah screams, the joyous tone of the shout not doing a thing to help Wirt feel less horrified. On the contrary, dread and terror are seeping into his bones quite spectacularly.

“What? What? What ? What are- Are you-?!”

She grabs both of his shoulders with her talon-like fingers and squeezes, hard enough that Wirt both shuts up and winces. A second cry of delight is released directly into his face.

“Pines?” She squeals, pointedly shaking the paper in Wirt’s grip while simultaneously draining all color from his face, “I’ve been the Hufflepuff mascot for years; I know all of the players on every team by name- Mabel Pines is a Gryffindor chaser, and she has a brother! ‘I could love a woman’ my ass- Oh my god, is this what you’ve been obsessing over forever? I can’t believe you have a real crush-!”

He claps a trembling, probably sweaty hand over her mouth, uncaring of the potential grossness in that moment, “Sorry, but can you speak up a little please? There might be a few people in Hogsmeade who missed that.”

Practically vibrating with elation, Sarah peels the hand off of her mouth to beam at him.

“Sorry,” She whispers, looking everything but, “You should tell him.”

Wirt scoffs, hands awkwardly fumbling in midair before landing in the intended gesture to the parchment littering his bedspread and the floor around the area, “Yes, well, what do you think I’m doing?”

The smile drops from her face, replaced with a look of something resembling pinched pity, “Oh no. You’re doing… that thing you do.”

“Uh,” He takes an unsure step away from her, scrabbling for a response, “Wh- What thing? I don’t have a thing.”

“You do. This thing,” Sarah frowns, crossing her arms and then chewing her lip, “… I’ll have to take action. You understand.”

He shakes his head, desperately, mouth going dry, “No, I don’t. I really, really-”

Her horribly stubborn mind made up, she snatches the paper yet again and sprints out of the room, ignoring the several squawks of protest that follow her out the door.

Wirt doesn’t go after her, simply out of fear of what gossip could come from someone seeing him chasing down a girl running out of his dorm. Sarah, the cunning hellion, probably knows this.

With a final, unsatisfying noise of annoyance/agony, he throws himself on both his mattress and the incriminating parchment, bemoaning every choice he’s made that’s led him up to this point. In doing so, his dramatic label returns in an even louder font than before.

Sarah expertly avoids him for almost two weeks. Not an easy feat, considering how many class periods they share.

He would like to report that the issue has completely slipped from his mind and that he’s occupied himself with schoolwork and the like. He would love to.

As it is, with each day that passes by without incident, Wirt’s anxiety over the matter unhelpfully and unhealthily multiplies. He’s little more than a low-functioning skin sack overflowing with crippling angst at this point.

Today is hopefully going to pour out at least a portion of the potent unease filling his- him- He’s lost the metaphor, but he has not lost the cautious optimism brought on by the Quidditch match starting in mere minutes.

He is not a sports man himself, true. It is also true that he’s not at all excited by the prospect of idly standing around, watching balls flying through the air and being chased around in a repetitive, violent game that can last for hours .

No, he’s more so looking forward to ogling the Gryffindor team’s unofficial head cheerleader. His binoculars dangle cheerfully from his neck in preparation as he climbs the stairs to claim his usual spot in the towering Hufflepuff bleachers.

This has been going on since, well, since the first match Mabel Pines played in Wirt’s fifth year. He had been dragged to the game by an overenthusiastic Greg, who couldn’t contain his delight over watching his first school quidditch match with his first sibling in his first year- It was as insufferable and adorable as it sounded.

Accompanying the Gryffindor’s team new chaser was a twin brother so supportive it surpassed extra and so sweet it made Wirt’s chest ache. Watching the cute brunet in the tower across from him scream and flail and jump had been… endearing. And Wirt had envied his confidence. That was all it had been. For months .

It escalated, obviously, because Wirt’s hobbies include reading flowery poetry and overthinking all of his relationships with people, no matter the status; Friend, family, classmate, stranger that he’s been staring at for a wildly inappropriate duration of time, professor.

After his admittedly nonsensical crush on the boy fully developed, Wirt began his action plan. Began planning his action plan, he means. Of course.

But he has done some rather daring things aside from formulating a few risque, hypothetical situations for the wooing process. He- He had inconspicuously asked around until he got the guy’s name and- and- and continued to regularly make eyes through binoculars at Dipper . Whom he has never actually seen up close.

“Progress ,” He weakly lies to himself under his breath as he finds a good place to sit.

His hands wrap around the binoculars and hold them over his eyes, guiding the object in different directions to assist him in his hunt for the place where Dipper can typically be found. The spot is almost immediately discovered (what with his unsavory amount of practice), but there doesn’t appear to be an exuberant ball of eye candy anywhere near the area.

Wirt lowers his binoculars in confusion. The puzzlement he feels quickly shifts into crushing disappointment as potential scenarios for Dipper’s absence flood his head; Each speculative train of thought growing more devastating than the last.

Mourning the loss of his possibly busy/sick/lost/evil/murdered soul mate, Wirt’s circumspect optimism slumps along with his posture. This month is shaping up to be one of unadulterated suck.

“Hi.”

“Hi,” Wirt drones, feeling miserable and doubtlessly looking even worse as his head turns in the direction of the person who’s sat beside him.

Shock shoves despair out of the spotlight with inhumane force as Wirt locks eyes with- with- with-

“Dipper,” Dipper sticks an unsure hand out at Wirt, face pink, “We, uh… I sit behind you? In History Of Magic.”

Wirt stares. This is news to him. But it would be, bearing in mind that it’s Wirts first class of the day and he tends to sleep through it rather soundly.

What a fucking mistake that was; For both his love life and his grades. Kill him.

Self hatred striking him like a brick to the skull, he nods, “Yeah. Yes. Be- Behind me. I know.”

He didn’t. He super did not, in fact, but he would bet every single Knut in his vault that Sarah super did . They will be having words. Whenever he’s able to hunt her down, that is.

“Yeah,” Dipper is smiling, an image that Wirt should be very used to, but the uncertainty in his expression is very different from what he’s used to being audience to, “So… your name…?”

Wirt almost dives off of the bleachers when he remembers the hand that Dipper’s been holding out for a while now is meant to be shaken, “Sorry. I- Wirt. Me. I’m Wirt.”

Bury him in the dirt. He still hasn’t grabbed the guy’s hand, for the love of everything-

“Wirt,” Dipper repeats, taking the initiative to grab Wirt’s horribly limp hand and pump their joined hands up and down a few awkward times, “Nice to meet you.”

His skin is soft, so soft, dear lord , “Same.”

It has to be illegal to be this socially inept, someone should just take him the hell out-

“So, uh,” Dipper’s voice cracks and he doesn’t release Wirt’s hand after the uncomfortable handshake, “I want to take you out.”

Good god, a volunteer- Oh. Oh .

“Oh,” Wirt is nothing if not an eloquent man.

“I know,” Dipper is no longer pink, but a vibrant red as his words per minute rate charges into warp speed, “This seems kind of out of nowhere doesn’t it? W- Well, it’s not. Sort of. Sure, uh, we’ve never talked before. So, this is definitely weird. I get that, but not really, because I’ve been trying to figure out how to do this since the start of the semester. I actually wrote a script for this, but my sister found it and- and it is now destroyed. Which is probably for the best, but whatever thick layer of cheese was on that paper has to be better than this. This is a mess. I am a mess. And I’m going to go. Sorry about… Me.”

Dipper’s hand slides out of his own as he stands from the bleachers and turns to leave with a quickness that has Wirt scrambling. He has to think fast and that is by no means a strong suit of his.

“Kay,” Is the first thing to loudly and stupidly slip from his mouth.

Dipper shuffles his feet, turning his neck to look back with distress clearly written on his face, “What?”

Wirt, appearing equally woeful, doesn’t know, “Earlier. I- I was trying to say okay. Oh. Kay. To taking me out. Okay. Okay?”

A broad grin that Wirt is much more accustomed to seeing slowly stretches Dipper’s mouth, “Okay.”

Wirt might’ve smiled back, he’s not positive. And he really doesn’t think to check, once the quite demanding distraction of the entirety of the Gryffindor Quidditch tower rhythmically stomping and clapping starts up.

“ Okay! ” An amplified, horribly familiar voice joins the stomping.

Whatever mood the two had been close to finding immediately darts back into expert hiding.

A honey badger on a broomstick confirms Wirt’s fears, showboating around the Gryffindor bleachers before zooming to the middle of the Quidditch field.

Wirt turns to Dipper, not too far away from bursting into tears, “I sincerely apologize for whatever is about to happen.”

Dipper’s eyebrows raise, “Wha- Oh my god.”

A second broomstick is in the air, this one not holding up an intrusive girl in a fursuit, but a brunette in a Gryffindor Quidditch uniform.

“Same to you,” Dipper meekly continues.

They brace themselves, the both of them fighting the urge to interchangeably dive or enthusiastically flip off of the tower.

The stomping and clapping continue, joined with a horrible vocal parody of Queen’s We Will Rock You , the traditional words replaced with a foreboding, You Should Go Out. Sarah and who Wirt assumes to be Dipper’s twin sister Mabel begin to fly through the air again, puffs of thick white smoke trailing behind their brooms in true Elphaba fashion.

Dipper and Wirt emit noises of intense emotional suffering in unison.

In no time at all the chanting in the Gryffindor bleachers reaches a crescendo and ends. As this happens, the writing in the air can be very clearly read as ‘ Dipper and Wirt Should Totally Date ’. With over five exclamation points. Fireworks go off. Wirt cries.

Sarah and Mabel begin to head in their direction at a frightening speed. Running would be futile.

“Wirt!” Sarah giddily screeches before the pair of girls come to a stopping point directly in front of him, “Ask him!”

The crowd whoops their support as the furry lightly touches Wirt’s throat with the tip of her wand. Wirt coughs, the sound echoing nerve-wrackingly as everyone quiets. The silence huffs down his neck, expectation on its breath.

He swallows, glancing over at Dipper’s shocked/horrified/pretty face before croaking, “He already asked me.”

Dipper clears his throat, and Mabel’s wand is pressed against his neck.

“He said yes,” Dipper mumbles, running a nervous hand through his mass of fluff parading as hair.

“Yeah,” Wirt lamely confirms.

The pathetic smattering of applause the finale of the overly dramatic display earns is almost as humiliating as the display itself. Almost.

Mabel and Sarah flee before revenge can strike. And make no mistake, Wirt is planning on a hefty amount of revenge and it is guaranteed to be cruel. Whenever he gets around to exacting it, of course.

The game announcer thankfully takes pity on them and changes the subject by beginning to introduce the players. Everyone moves on in an attempt to smother the cringe they all feel, but this specific brand of mortification is comparable only to a particularly out of control internal forest fire.

Wirt knows this, because he himself is currently trying to let the flames consume him.

“… Hogsmeade trip this weekend,” Dipper mentions, his voice trembling with chagrin.

“Yes,” He responds, voice quaking similarly.

“We could meet at The Three Broomsticks?” Dipper smiles, wryly, “If you still want-”

“I want. I do. Uh. Yes,” Wirt hatefully rubs at his face, “Sounds good.”

“Good,” Dipper nods, and jerks a thumb over his shoulder, “So, I’m gonna head back to my dorm and… maybe cast a memory charm on myself.”

“Understandable,” Wirt’s lips twitch, “See you this weekend- Or, w- well, in History Of Magic tomorrow, I guess.”

“Looking forward to it,” Dipper grins.

And it is inarguably awkward, but it also sweet , so Wirt has to fake no sincerity whatsoever when he replies, “Me too.”