Muse: YJW
(Part 1)
Don't meet your heroes.
They'll always disappoint you.
Don't meet your idols.
They'll never let you go.
Genre: Angst, Dark Romance, SMUT, PWP, psycho!won x fan! reader, psychological horror
WC: 11k
DISCLAIMER: this is for entertainment purposes only this does not reflect my opinion on any mentioned characters
Content Warnings: psycho fanboy Jungwon, manipulation, intimidation, stalking, obsession, gaslighting, tracking, isolation, bodily harm, overworking, Jungwon overall is not a good person here, honestly neither is reader. Reader is gullible and it will be insufferable, that is intentional,
NSFW Content Warnings: None (For now)
It’s crazy how someone can inspire thousands, no, millions of people to create beautiful things. One man, millions of fans, each one more talented than the other. There’s fanartists who could capture the essence of any moment, through drawings. There are cover artists, whose every perfect note, every carefully choreographed dance move was a tribute to their artist. There are impersonators, cosplayers, whose likeness is uncanny. Fanfiction authors. Yes, them too. They put our delusions into words, and that too is a tribute in its own way. All of them, so diverse yet completely the same. They all love their artist. He’s their muse, their idol, the reason they create art in the first place. How crazy is it then, that his muse, his inspiration, his unhealthy obsession is his very own fan?
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
—prologue
Enhypen were known for their moody sultry music and aesthetic which was led by their very own Yang Jungwon, the leader in the group of 7. Thanks to is genius, the kpop group rose in the charts quickly, and violently. Everyone praised not only his abilities but his members’. But times were tough on the group, so the group announced a hiatus.
Many fans were worried, disappointed, but understood that they may need to rest, regroup, recuperate and instead found solace in each other’s work, keeping the fandom alive through their own tributes. Among them rose a few fan artists, getting recognition as minor celebrities in their own right.
It was after this boom of fan interaction that Enhypen came back in full swing with back to back albums, singles, music videos, performances, the works, all to promote their newest album Taste, a refreshing and chilling album with the songs starting light and flirty and progressively getting darker. The album reached global success, with the music video breaking multiple view and replay records. Enhypen’s activities and schedules saw no end.
“-and now I’d like to welcome in our star guests of the evening to talk about their newest album. ladies and gentlemen, we’ve hosted many amazing kpop groups but this one rose to legend status almost immediately. Please help me welcome ENHYPEN!”
The studio erupted into cheering and screams, as 7 men walked into the studio, waving and bowing to the people as they sat down.
“Thank you so much for coming and thank you so much for coming back!” The host exclaimed.
“Thank you for having us.” Heeseung smiled, sending the crowd into squeals. “We happy to be back!”
“Yes, yes, for those of you who don’t know, Enhypen has just released a new album called Taste, correct?”
The group nodded. “Taste: Addiction.” Jungwon added.
“So, Jungwon, as the leader of Enhypen, I have to ask.” A host covering their booming success asked. “What happened? How did you come back so strong?”
Jungwon replied. “Well, we just needed a little time to make something ENGENE could be proud of listening to.”
“Right, and who are ENGENES?”
Heeseung smiled fondly. “ENGENE’s are our fans. They are the driving force behind us, everything is for them.”
“I see so would you say that the fans gave you the push you needed to create music again?”
“Absolutely. While we were on hiatus, I’ve seen so many of the tributes that Engenes made for us.” Jungwon nodded. “Their love for us resonated with me, so we had plenty to be inspired by.” His band members nodded along, replying with their own words of affirmation.
“It’s amazing how much you love your fans, really.” The host grinned, leaning in. “So tell me. Is there a particular fan that caught your attention?”
The members exchanged cautious glances. “Well..” Jungwon started. “Yes. There is a dance cover group that I’m a pretty big fan of.”
“Really? Would to care to share the name?”
“Maybe not this time.” Jungwon chuckled nervously. “I don’t think they want to become overwhelmed by the fans.”
“Why, are they well known?”
“They’re pretty popular.” Jay nodded. “They’re all watches Jungwon nowadays. They’re pretty good I like their videos too.”
“Well, maybe some day you could collab?”
“Maybe some day.” Jungwon shook his head. “But not yet at least.”
After that day, speculations and theories crowded every fan community page, everyone tossing in their guess of who is the mystery group. Countless group names have been dropped, Code9, Koreos, Axis, Luminie, and Engenue, just to name a couple.
Soon, however, the buzz died down as a Weverse notification pinged on every phone.
[Notice] ENHYPEN TASTE:ADDICTION Fan Event Announcement
Hello.
We are excited to announce a one of a kind fan event. 50 fans will be randomly selected in a drawing to be invited to a choreography masterclass with one member of ENHYPEN.
Details to enter drawing:..
—-
“OH MY GOD.” You screamed, sprinting out of your practice room.
“What what what?” Ria shouted, horrified by your sudden burst of energy after you were just planning your own death on the practice room floor. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing..” you grinned. “Nothing’s wrong. Everything’s perfect Ria!”
“Clearly not, you’re losing your shit before noon.” She folded her arms.
Wordlessly you held up your phone. She squinted at it. Her lips moved silently as she read the email on her phone. Her eyes widened as she got to the word “congratulations.”
“You’re kidding.” She whispered. “You won?!”
“I won!” You shouted, your screams of excitement being met with her own. “We’re going to see Jungwon up close and personal!”
“Woah hold on we?” She stammered, pressing down on your shoulders to stop your jumping.
“Well yeah.” You shrug, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “I can bring a friend. What, you really think you wouldn’t come with me?”
Her face dropped. “And be perceived?” She let out a sound that was something between a scoff and a gasp. “Hell no!”
“Why not?” You crossed your arms. “Ria you’ve been there every step of the of the way with me when we created Engenue. This is gonna be a big thing for us!”
She sighed. “I don’t know girl.”
“C’mon.” You grinned. “It will be worth every second.”
“Fine.”
- -
The time between the email and the day of the masterclass went by like a blur. One moment, you were celebrating your win with your team in LA, and in the next you were overthinking over your outfit in Seoul.
“Girl.” Ria rolled her eyes. “Just pick one. They’re both green.”
You stood in front of her in nothing but a bra and black loose fitting cargo pants, holding two nearly identical tight fitting green crop tops. “Yeah..” you mumbled, staring at the fabric in your hands. “But like…one’s forest green and the other’s army green.”
“You’ve gotta be kidding me.” She gave a shocked laugh. “Look.” She stood up. “I’m wearing army green pants and a black top. So do you want to match or do you want to be different.”
“I don’t know.”
“Oh my God, just wear the army green and let’s go.” She huffed, yanking the forest green top out of your hands.
“Thank youuu.” You replied in a singsong voice, pulling the top over your head.
—-
1 hour left.
You stood in line with Ria and 48 other lucky participants inside the building. Everyone whispered nervously amongst each other, excited giggles breaking through the murmur. The atmosphere was tense with excitement and a weird intimate feel. Like you are just moments away from meeting him. Your idol, Yang Jungwon.
You nervously smoothed out your cargo pants against you legs when you felt a light tap on your elbow. You looked up.
“Sorry.” A girl that looked no older than 16 whispered, her eyes wide with wonder. “Aren’t you guys a part of Engenue?”
You grinned. “Yeah we are.”
Her face lit up. “I watch your guys’ dance videos all the time! You’re really good.”
“Thank you!” Ria smiled at the young girl.
After her, a couple other fans noticed and came up to you and Ria, giving compliments and asking for tips. The conversation helped you relax focusing on your fellow fans instead of nervously wiping your sweaty palms against your crop top every five seconds.
Finally, you were led into a giant practice room. The group was quiet until the slow realization of what this oddly familiar room is hit them simultaneously. This is Enhypen’s practice room. Nervous Whispers and giggles about how real this felt filled the room as you and the others were carefully assigned and positioned to points across the room.
As you warmed up with Ria you heard the doors to the room creak open. You tensed, every muscle and nerve strung with anticipation. The practice room was blanketed with a reverent silence. You stared so hard at the door you were sure you could burn a hole in it. The door opened to reveal..
Enhypen’s choreographer.
The crowd breathed a collective sigh of relief and disappointment. You let out a slightly annoyed tsk before giving Ria a sheepish grin.
“Got riled up for nothing.” You mumbled. She rolled her eyes with an affectionate smirk. “You better breathe now, or you’ll pass out before he walks in.” She whispers, nudging you with her shoulder.
“How are you so calm about this?” You whispered back.
“I’m not.” She replied. “I’m just really good at hiding it.”
You giggled as the room quieted as the choreographer spoke. “Alright ladies and gentlemen, I know you’re ready to see Jungwon in action, but I want to set some ground rules first. And let’s get through them quick because he’s just behind that door.” The room rushed with excited giggles. “Now. Please do not scream, mob, or try to touch Jungwon unless he specifically instructs otherwise. Keep a distance between him and amongst yourselves. Be respectful, pay attention, keep your phones away unless instructed otherwise. Sound good?”
You nodded absentmindedly. You were so close. So close to seeing him. Meeting him. Being perceived by him. Your hands clenched in anticipation. In the tense silence, the door reopened. And suddenly the room was hot. And then cold. And then fuzzy. Shit. There he was.
Yang Jungwon.
Your breath caught in your throat, the sound drowned out by your own hammering heart. He was effortlessly ethereal, an angel in a loose fitting zip up and jeans. He walked into the room with a practiced efficiency, if not with a slight charming tensity. As he stood in the front of the room, everyone was silent, frozen in awe. He watched the crowd, with an awkward little bow.
“Hi everyone!” He smiled brightly. “Are you guys ready to dance?”
The crowd finally broke out of their stupor with excited cheers. He laughed, giving another shy little nod. He’s perfect.
You squeal with the rest of the girls in the giant practice room as he turned his back to the crowd, directing from the mirror. His eyes flicked to you for a second. A rush of giddiness flooded you and you whispered excited little “he looked at me!”’s to Ria who held your arm, partially in moral support partially to stop you from jumping.
“Let’s start with a warm up.” Jungwon said, loud enough for everyone to hear, taking a wider stance.
The masterclass was the best kind of torture as you balanced on the fine edge of doing everything he said and trying not to freak out any time he scanned the room. His technique, his strictness, his demand for perfection yet effortless instruction showed exactly why he was the leader of Enhypen. He didn’t go easy on the class, making sure every move was perfect with strict, ruthless corrections. And he did it with a smile. You followed every move, every command like it was the law.
“Okay everyone, let’s have a quick 5 minute break.” He called out. “Then we’ll try a run through with music.”
He stepped out of the room to safety as the crowd relaxed. You slumped against the nearest mirror, bottle in hand.
“He was definitely looking, girl.” Ria sat next to you, quirking your eyebrows.
You shook your head mid sip. “Don’t make me more delusional than I already am.”
She chuckled, taking a sip from her own. “I’m not, I’m serious.”
“Right.” You rolled your eyes. “Hi Serious.”
The moment Jungwon walked back into the room you shut up, quickly scrambling to your feet and to your spot.
“Alright.” He said, eyes finding yours for just a second, but enough for all your nerves to stand at attention. “Let’s try it with music.”
He was perfect. Effortless. Like this was a walk in the park for him. And the music, it changed you.
You loved to dance since you were a child. Dancing felt like home. And it showed in the way your eyes glazed over and you transformed from nervous fangirl to the main dancer of Engenue, showing exactly why you deserved to be here. Even if it was a random drawing.
You and Jungwon fell in sync, perfect mirror images, not just in form but in power, in energy down to the facial expressions. Heads whipped around, left and right, between the two of you. The other lucky dancers faltered, distracted by the wild movement that was amplified by the mirroring effect. It was like you were possessed by the same music. The drive. The real desperation. It was completely identical.
The song finally ended, and you stood, eyes burning, lungs burning. Suddenly the other dancers began to applaud and cheer for Jungwon. Pride, excitement, gratitude filled heart as you grinned at Ria, trying to catch your breath.
“You were amazing.” She whispered, just loud enough for you to hear through the excited chatter of fans.
“So were you.” You whispered back, head spinning with adrenaline.
“Okay okay, quiet down.” Jungwon shushed the crowd. It baffled you how commanding his presence can be despite how cute he was. “I want to try something. Please step all the way back to the wall.”
Once everyone complied, he walked out to the center of the room. “Who here knows the choreography to Moonstruck?”
A handful of hands went up. You just stared at Jungwon enamored, until Ria smacked your arm. “Oh shit, right.” You shook out of your stupor, raising your hand.
His eyes carefully scanned the crowd. “I want to try it a little differently. I need a volunteer.”
Immediately all hands shot up, even those who didn’t know the choreography. with excited “Me!” “Me!”’s Peppering the chatter. You of course, bounced along with everyone with your hand up, chest pounding with hope. Jungwon’s scanning eye fell on you. And your heart stopped in its chest. He pointed.
“You in the green top.” He said, still pointing.
“Come up here for a minute, what’s your name?” You looked behind you expectantly, just to not make a fool of yourself. Jungwon cleared his throat, beckoning at you. “You’re the only one wearing a green top.”
Me? Your head stopped working. Me? Oh my God ME? HE’S LOOKING AT ME?
“I-uh…” you stammered. “Yeah..I- um..dancing- I mean…sure, I can..”
Ria shoved you forward. Hard. Gaining exactly 2 seconds of consciousness you made your way to toward Jungwon on stiff legs.
Oh my God..Oh my God..Oh my God..
“Hi Jungwon.” You tried to sound confident but your voice came out a hoarse whisper, as you tried to not lose your cool more than you already have. You winced at yourself, knowing exactly how much of an embarrassment you were being.
“Hi!” He smiled. “What’s your name?”
You mumbled your name out quietly, suddenly deeply embarrassed, wanting to crawl out of your skin and hide somewhere.
“You know the dance to Moonstruck, right?”
“Uh-huh..” you nodded slowly, completely stupefied. “I…yeah I know the dance.”
“Great.” He nodded and turned to the crowd. “We’re going to try a partnered dance.” Then his eyes trailed back to yours. “But we’ll do your interpretation.”
“What?” You tensed. There’s no fucking way. “You know my version?”
“You’re one of the dancers from Engenue Studios, right?” He tilted his head, examining you.
“I am. Yes, that’s me, I am.” You mumbled under your breath, nodding. “I’m Engenue.”
He smiled. “So we’re doing Engenue’s couple version of Moonstruck then. You know it don’t you?”
Know it? You created it. Performed it. Months of thought and hard work went into a meticulously choreographed couples dance. You designed it for the man and woman to touch as little as possible, instead opting to create an illusion of intimacy through proximity. Alright fine. I can do this. You swallowed hard. I know this. He’s just a dancer. I got this. HE KNOWS MY WORK. HE’S SEEN ME DANCE I need to calm down.
“Yeah.” You nodded, your voice small. “Yeah I know it.”
“Perfect.” He replied. “Music!”
The delicate beginning poured through surround speakers and suddenly your nerves didn’t matter. The graceful melody possessed you, melting away any fear, leaving only the emotions of the song. You rolled your shoulders back, straightened your back and locked into the moment. Your body fully relaxed, bending and swaying gracefully on muscle memory alone like your were made of water. Jungwon stepped in, easily mimicking your rhythm, your feel, completing the picture of impossible love you were trying to convey.
This wasn’t Enhypen’s usual sharp high energy dance. This was a jagged mix of slow fluidity and quick sharpness, requiring high flexibility and core strength. Anyone who’s seen the work of Engenue would recognize this haunting style as uniquely yours, perfect in its imperfection.
“Just the two of us..”
You lost yourself in the dance. You didn’t see anyone in the room, you didn’t even see Jungwon. You just saw a partner, encircling you, spinning around you so closely your noses nearly touched. But you weren’t nervous. You welcomed it. In that moment, it really was just the two of you. You held his gaze as long as you could before your arms obscured the view. You took a delicate step back, arching away but Jungwon wouldn’t allow it.
“Let me hold you close..”
Jungwon gingerly took both your wrists, pulling you in so close his nose rushed your cheek. Just an accidental skim, barely a touch, and yet it felt like fire against your skin. For a moment you gained clarity, your breath stopping in your lungs as you looked into his eyes. This wasn’t a part of your choreography. He was fully lost in the music, gazing into your eyes so tenderly, it nearly melted your heart. His hands on your wrists were warm, firm, sending sparks directly into your veins. It was beautiful.
It almost made you feel guilty, like you were seeing a part of him you weren’t supposed to. Like who were you to see what Jungwon looks like when he is vulnerable in love? But then again, this is just a performance. An act. And he’s perfect at it.
Before you can second guess yourself you leaned into it, not allowing another misstep. You took charge, putting some respectful space between you two with a few graceful turns and maneuvers, as you led him to the end of the final chorus. The music stopped. The room fell silent, yours and Jungwon’s heavy breaths and the steady hum of the air conditioner the only sound.
“Wow.” Someone in the crowd muttered.
The fans burst into cheers, the sound finally shaking you out of your trance like state. Your head whipped to Jungwon, whose gaze went from longing to clinical professionalism. You stared, desperate to hear what he thought of your performance.
“Not bad.” He said, blowing a lock of hair out of his eyes. “You did stiffen up there at the end, your upper back was completely tensed. But otherwise great form.” As you nodded he didn’t let go of your wrist. “Everyone, notice that I didn’t follow the choreography exactly towards the end. And notice how she tensed up. Dance is not just movement, it’s an act. It’s method. So if you feel in that moment that you can add something even better to the performance do it. However,” his eyes flicked back to you. “It’s also important to expect the unexpected from your partner and not seize when they go off script.”
You nodded vigorously as if trying to shake his words into your brain. “Got it, Jungwon. Thank you for the advice-“ You began to talk but his grip on your wrist tightened. Not tight enough to hurt, not even tight enough to force, just a gentle squeeze telling you to wait. You faltered, face flushed.
“Let’s try that again, with that tip in mind, yeah?” He asked, raising a brow at you expectantly. “You ready?”
“Uh…yeah.” Your face flushed red, still overwhelmed from the shockingly intimate moment you shared with your own bias and now with the anxiety of having to do it again. “Yeah, I’m ready.”
“Music!”
And you were gone. No nerves, no anxiety or flush, you poured yourself back into the music, hitting every beat with purpose. This wasn’t just muscle memory anymore, it was deliberate, every motion delivered with calculated precision and finesse. As the song neared the final chorus, the tender affection in Jungwon’s eyes darkened with a small eyebrow quirk. Be ready.
With a barely there nod, you knew you had to expect anything. I’m ready.
“Let me hold you close..”
Jungwon’s hands, warm and sure, caught your waist. He pulled you flush against his chest, his breath ghosting across your face. His lips curled into a small challenging smirk. You couldn’t even gasp. Your heart hammered so loudly in your chest you were sure he felt it against his own.
Oh my God, OH MY GOD, Jungwon is holding me Yang fucking Jungwon is holding me in his arms, this isn’t a drill, okay PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER don’t panic THINK OF SOMETHING, he’s waiting, fuck it SPLIT
You wrapped your arms around his neck and let yourself free fall into a split between his legs. His eyes widened in shock but he didn’t falter, clutching your waist tighter, lowering you both to the floor, creating a beautiful silhouette, exactly as you envisioned it. The joint pose came out so well it shocked you. It was like he knew exactly how to position your body, as if he was your partner for years. His expertise was astounding but also you were distracted by the fact that it’s Jungwon, dammit!
The music cut, and you were still frozen, panting. Jungwon stared into your eyes hard as he tried to catch his breath. Slowly, his face melted from hard determination into a broad smile. His eyes shone with pride, captivating your mind to the point of not hearing the crowd go wild for your join performance. His grip on your waist finally loosened and he helped you off the floor, his touch sending sparks through you, despite his hands were all over you just now.
“See that’s what I’m talking about!” He exclaimed proudly. “Great, job. Thank you for demonstrating with me.” He motioned for you to walk back to the mirrored wall, into the excited awaiting crowd. You smiled blankly at the praised and congratulations, your mind focused on nothing, just-
Jungwon Jungwon Jungwon Jungwon
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Ria whispered into your ear, voice fierce with awe. “You killed it up there. And the way he was looking at you? Girl, that was absolutely insane and the split-“
“I danced with Jungwon.” You mumbled deliriously, dumb grin finding its way onto your face as you looked at Jungwon, his voice not even audible over your thundering heart. What you did catch was the way his eyes subtly flicked to you every few minutes.
The masterclass ended with plenty of fanfare. Staff came in to pose the crowd, taking group photos and bringing in merchandise that Jungwon signed for each person. You waited giddily with Ria, album in hand, as if you’re meeting him for the first time as he makes his way down the line, signing gifts that staff handed him.
“For your hard work.” He held out an extra plushy to you with a sweet dimpled smile. His gaze lingered as if he was holding back a secret he was dying to tell you. “Just a little something extra for helping me demonstrate today.”
Your heart swelled at the recognition. It was a funny little thing, no larger than the palm of your hand, a light blue bat with a star on its eye. You held back a squeal.
“Thank you so much! Really I appreciate it!” You bowed continuously, carefully taking it from his outstretched hands. They lingered for just a second, fingertips accidentally brushing yours. That felt more intimate than any touch, grab or caress during the dance. Your face flamed. “Thank you! Thank you so much!” You babbled, just to drown out the screams in your own head. “Really I-you don’t know how much this means to me. Thank you!”
He gave a flustered chuckle before bowing a little and turning his attention to the next fan. And you? You were on cloud 9. As he said his goodbyes amongst cheers and left, you turned to Ria with a grin that could only be described as glee in its purest form.
“Ria!” You whisper screamed as you clutched the plush tightly to your chest like it might run away. “I can’t believe it. Look at the foot! It’s signed!”
She chuckled, ushering you out of the HYBE building. “You just danced with the Jungwon, who wouldn’t stop looking at you by the way, and you’re excited over a plushy key chain?” As you nodded, she laughed, shaking her head. “Honestly I don’t blame you.”
You grinned. “I’m literally never parting with it.”
—- meanwhile
Jungwon, the perfect, poised image of a global idol walked back with the staff to Enhypen’s private practice room, politely greeting oncoming staff and answering necessary questions as he went.
“I’m just going to try a sequence I had in mind. You go ahead.” He waved them off, stepping into the room, closing the door with a decisive click. The facade crashed.
He slumped to the floor against the mirrored wall, shaking. His heart thundered loud in his ears, breathing coming to him heavy. And yet, a rush of pure euphoria filled him. He couldn’t stop replaying the dance with you in his head. The way you looked at him, face mirroring the devotion that he felt, the way your hands trembled under his touch, the way you mouthed the words of the song like you meant them. He finally did it. He saw you up close.
“Oh my God.” He muttered into his hands, a shaky grin spreading across his lips. “I can’t believe it.”
The door to the practice room creaked open and Jay poked his head in. Seeing Jungwon’s jellified state, he smirked. “Saw the Engenue dancers made it. How was it?”
Jungwon lifted his head up, eyes shining with pure star struck bliss. “Jay-hyung. I saw her. She was right in front of me!” He whispered as if he didn’t trust his own voice. “She danced with me, she touched me, she…she’s real!”
Jay chuckled, plopping on the floor in front of Jungwon. “That good, huh?”
“She’s even prettier in person, Jay-hyung!” Jungwon exclaimed, beaming with excitement. “You should have seen the way she danced, the way her face glowed! She’s everything.”
“Told you the masterclass would be a good idea.” Jay quirked his brow. “At least now you’ll calm down and lock in after seeing her, right?”
“Yeah.” Jungwon murmured absentmindedly, unlocking his phone and opening up a live feed, staring into it with intense focus. “Yeah, right. Lock in.” An odd, secretive little smile worked its way onto his face, one of a dark, almost smug satisfaction. “Yeah I’ll definitely lock in now.”
—-
You flew back to LA in a constant buzz of pure joy, cuddling the small plush keychain in your hand.
“It really is cute.” Ria smiled down at it as you stroked it reverently with your thumb.
“I know.” You sighed, squishing it softly in your hand. “Not as cute as Jungwon though. This is one of the craziest core memories, let me tell you.”
“How did it feel?” She tilted her head at you.
You answered a shy wistful smile. “He’s a lot stronger than I expected. And his hands are so warm. And he smells so good, even after dancing for hours.”
Ria shook her head with a knowing grin. “Don’t get all delusional now.”
“I won’t.” You promised with a giggle. “Just…gonna appreciate the memory.”
By the time you landed in LA, the envlog showcasing the masterclass blew up. Everyone was wondering who the girl with the blurred out face was, who was lucky enough to dance with Jungwon. The one who had Jungwon watching her like she hung the moon.
—-
With how busy you are, you almost missed the notification. But you must have gotten lucky.
ENHYPEN TASTE:ADDICTION
WORLD TOUR: MUSE
Concert Information
Hello.
We are excited to announce another drawing. 40 front row seats will be raffled off to 20 lucky fans to the Los Angeles stop of the MUSE world tour. No purchase required. Fill out the application below to participate in the raffle.
You and Ria exchanged glances. “What are the odds?”
She shrugged. “Worth a shot.”
Thousands, no, millions of fans, including you filled out the application. As the world nervously waited for the deadline, the announcement, you lost yourself in your team. Engenue had their work cut out for them, with ENHYPEN releasing 8 new songs that need multiple versions of fan choreographies. If you’re busy, you don’t have time to get your hopes up.
You were back in LA, in the Engenue Studios practice room dancing to a DPR Ian track when Ria walked in, clutching her phone.
“It’s here.” Ria said quietly, holding up her phone for you to see. On it, an unopened email from HYBE. She looked relaxed but the tension in her shoulders gave her away. She was just as nervous as you are. “Did you get it?”
“Yeah.” You all but whispered, looking down at the notification. “On 3?” She nodded.
“1..2..3!”
She looked up at you, disappointed but not surprised. “Didn’t get it.” She said with a sad little smile, holding up her phone, apology email on display.
You didn’t even notice. You widened eyes were fixed to the message. “I did.” You replied, monotonously, too shocked to freak out properly.
“What?” She exclaimed, clutching your phone, angling it to see better. “You’re kidding…” she murmured, skimming the edge of the phone with her fingers like it was magical. “There’s no way.”
“I guess there is.” You whispered back. “2 seats.”
Ria’s eyes shifted between you and the phone. You nodded, face breaking into a grin.
You both broke into excited squeals like children, hugging tightly. “We’re getting barricade for sure!”
Ria pulled away with a teasing smirk. “Of course we will. You’re the luckiest person alive apparently, 2 raffles in a month.” She laughed. “Almost like someone is looking out for you.”
“Yeah sure.” You scoffed. “Of course they are.“
—-
The day of the concert loomed near, with everyone, ENHYPEN and fans alike getting frantically ready. You stood with arm in arm Ria hand clutching the barricade railing, dressed to the nines.
“I’m so excited!” You whispered to Ria. She agreed with a small squeeze to your hand, watching the other 20 thousand fans buzz with excitement.
Backstage, stylists, managers and interns with clipboards bustled about, frantically preparing the 7 member band for the show ahead. Jungwon sat in his makeup chair, fully immersed in the video playing on his phone, humming Beautiful by DPR Ian. He was watching the video like he was trying to commit every single frame to memory.
“Boys we’re on in 5!” A staff member called as he passed by.
Jungwon looked up from his phone, eyes slightly dazed. “Alright.” He murmured to practically himself. “I’ll be right there.”
“Are you alright?” Jay raised a brow at him. “You’ve been weird all day, constantly your phone.”
“Hm? It’s nothing.” Jungwon locked his phone. “Let’s go.”
The group made their way to the stage, just a few feet away from the rest of the world. Jungwon peaked around the corner to survey the crowd. Suddenly his eyes found your face, laughing along with fans at barricade, so close he could see your eyes shining. You looked beautiful. Radiant. Jungwon’s chest pounded at the sight of you. After meticulously, no religiously following your dance career over 2 years, you’re finally right in front of him. Below him. Frustratingly within reach yet so far. A nervous shudder threaded his nerves. What if he made a fool of himself?
“Jungwon?”
He jolted back, pressing his back against the wall, eyes wide, face flushed. He was shaking.
“Woah.” Heeseung rushed out to steady him. “You okay? Stage fright?”
Jungwon’s unfocused gaze flitted to him. “Hyung.” He whispered, voice tight with nerves and reverence. “She’s here!”
“Who?” Heeseung raised a brow. Then it hit him. A slow teasing smirk spread across his face. “That Engenue girl, huh? The one you never shut up about?”
Jungwon nodded. “I don’t think I can-“
“Yes you can.” Heeseung scoffed. “Remember. She’s your fan. She’s here to see you. She’s expecting a show from you tonight.You got this.”
Jungwon took a deep breath. “Yeah.” He smiled. “She’s my fan.” My fan. Mine.
Heeseung’s little pep talk did have an effect on Jungwon. Just an unexpected one. And so he knew what he had to do. He had to put on a show like never before, like rent was due in the morning. All for you. Only for you.
—-
The show was like nothing you’ve seen before. Nothing of this magnitude. You screamed along to every song, jumping up and down, heart bursting with joy. Your face hurt from smiling. The boys, although you’ve seen them perform before, outdid themselves. They danced like their lives depended on it. And Jungwon.
Jungwon seemed to favor your section, interacting with the fans closest to you, sending them into squeals and screams anytime he’d get close. You couldn’t have asked for a better day. This was it. This was everything. During ments, the crowd went quiet.
“Thank you LA!” Jungwon shouted, sending the crowd into cheers. “I know we’ve been away for sometime, but don’t worry, we’re here now. Did you miss us?” You went wild with the rest of the stadium. Jungwon chuckled, shushing the crowd. “While we were gone, we were thinking of ways we could make it up to ENGENE, what kind of album we’d want to give you.
And well, we were inspired by-“ he faltered, staring into your section. Into you. He cleared his throat. “By um…” He gave a sheepish chuckle, awkwardly combing his fingers through his hair. “Sorry, everyone, I-uh…I’m just a little nervous. There is someone here, who I deeply respect, who has been a great inspiration to me. A choreographer who’s incredibly talented.” He gazed into your eyes, catching your breath. You clenched onto your lightstick, trying to ground yourself. There’s no way he’s talking about me. Right? Not possible. He wouldn’t even know I choreograph. You convinced yourself to climb out of your delusions.
“I won’t say who for now, but they know who are. I’m really honored to see them here today.” Amongst the cheers of the crowd, he smiled at you, a soft lingering smile, as he turned back to the front. For the rest of the evening, you couldn’t concentrate on anything but him and the tension headache that was building in your temples from all your screaming.
The encore was its own monster. As ENHYPEN performed Helium, running across the stage, interacting with fans, you screamed your heart out to the lyrics, holding your phone out for the perfect shot. You were busy recording Jake and Heeseung messing around when a firm looking chest obscured the view. You looked up to see Jungwon loom directly in front of you. You screamed, half in shock, half in glee. He laughed, giving a little wave amongst screaming fans and held his hand out. “Phone” he mouthed.
Without a second thought, you tossed your phone to him. He caught it with ease, turning around to take a selfie with you and other fans. You didn’t care how you looked and smiled as hard as you could, along with Ria and the fans around you. You held out your arms, ready to catch your phone back. But he didn’t throw it. Instead he made his way off stage to the barricade, much to the joy of all the ENGENE’s. He walked toward you, eyes fixed and phone in hand, that beautiful lingering smile still playing on his lips. Your stomach flipped with nerves.
“There’s no way!” You screamed. “There’s no way.”
He stood directly in front of you, tantalizingly close, enough to reach out and touch you. Suddenly, the world went mute. You could my hear anything, not the song, not the fans. The only thing you were able to perceive is him. He handed the phone back to you, taking extra care to make sure it didn’t drop or get snatched. His care was so expected yet so overwhelming for you. Like of course he was responsible, he’s the leader of one of the biggest groups in the world. Of course he had to be attentive. But it’s also Jungwon.
You were blushing mess at this point. “Thank you!” You shouted over the cheers. “Thank you Jungwon!”
He didn’t respond, just smiling at you fondly, before reaching over your head to brush loose confetti off of your head. You froze, feeling his hand carefully carding through your locks. It was just a second, a brief touch, but it was enough. Enough for you to fully register what is happening, and for the fans to scream in excitement, and maybe a little jealousy.
“I-“ you couldn’t even speak as he walked away, back onto the stage. What the fuck was that?
—-
“Girl I’m telling you.” Ria sighed as you made your way out of the stadium together. “You’re lucky as hell.”
You grinned, still dazed. “I know.”
Ria took your hand, seeing you stumbling over your heels. “Let’s see if we can use that luck for fansigns now, hm?”
You nodded solemnly eliciting a laugh from her. “I’ll see what I can do.”
You finally made it to your shared apartment, and bid each other goodnight. You showered, toweled off and dressed into a tank top and panties before settling into your cool sheets, hair still damp. You held the small plush key chain in your hands, reminiscing of the unforgettable night before lulling yourself into a deep sleep.
And yet somewhere in a Los Angeles hotel, unbeknownst to you someone is guarding your sleep with shaking reverence, worshipping every sleepy sigh like it was sacred.
For months, many people debated the identity of “blurred face” and “confetti girl” both moments going viral. Thankfully for you, the media is assuming they are different people.
Months have passed since that fateful concert when the producer of Engenue Studios, Erin, called you and Ria in for a meeting. “We’re getting bought out.”
—-
You furrowed your brow. “What do you mean bought out?”
“I mean literally.” She said numbly, like she herself couldn’t believe it. “I just spoke to Dani. Apparently she got an offer and it was too good to refuse.”
That didn’t make sense. Dani, the owner of the studio, built it on her own dime from scratch for you and Ria. She wouldn’t not consult you. Sure it was her property, her business but she wouldn’t leave you out of your own fate would she?
“It better be fucking good, what the fuck?” Ria seethed. “Why didn’t Dani call us?”
“You were on the plane.” The manager responded.
“That was 4 months ago!” You exclaimed. “Why is she telling us this now?”
You didn’t let Erin respond, and dialed Dani. “Dani what the fu-“
“Hear me out.” She cut you off. “I know you’re mad I didn’t talk to you. But this is a really good opportunity for you and you’d be too scared to take so I made an executive decision. The company is a pretty big deal.”
“WHAT?”
“Yeah, they wanted a group that will function as a dance team. You know, performing alone, but also performing as back up for the idols.”
“Why didn’t they just do auditions like they usually do?” Ria asked over the speaker.
“They wanted recognizable dancers, ones that won’t have to cover their faces and apparently, they got an internal suggestion.” Dani replied, her exasperation audible. “Listen, don’t freak out, they won’t be breaking us up too much. The studio will remain here, just the name will change.”
“Alright fine.” You nod hesitantly.
“And a few girls are gonna tried as background dancers for ENHYPEN’S next tour.”
“Huh?” Your eyes nearly popped out of your head.
“You heard me.”
“Who?” You mustered out.
Dani replied with a long string of names. “Scouts are coming by next week to do a final selection.”
“I…alright.” You hung up not knowing how to feel.
Your company got absorbed. Bought out and you didn’t even know. Now you’re label mates with Enhypen. . How does that even happen? What does this mean for Engenue? How will all this change? You thought to yourself as you practiced choreo absentmindedly.
You went home with Ria, bidding her a quiet night and slipping into your room. After a shower that consisted mainly of staring into the wall you came back into you room, toweling off and dressing in a cami and panties. Same routine, yet everything felt so different. You slid under the covers and held the small plushy over your head, examining it.
“Something weird’s going on. How did we just get traded like that? That doesn’t happen. Right? But at least I get to see Enhypen again.” You murmur to it, cuddling it close to your chest. “We’ll figure it out. It’s you and me against the world, plushy.” You stifle a laugh at your own childishness and drift off to sleep.
In a private Seoul studio, Jungwon smiled softly at his phone, stroking your sleeping image with his finger with a possessive reverence. His eyes shown with a worshipful adoration so intense that if you’d ever see him like this, he knew it would scare you.
“Yeah.” He whispered, his thumb pressing against the image of your lips. “You and me against the world, beautiful.”
—-
The next few weeks flew by in a blur of changes. 12 girls from your studio were chosen auditioned and 7 including you selected to go to Korea for a few months of training. While the agency wanted you to move to Korea indefinitely, you advocated for a split in residence, spending a few months in the U.S, and a few months in Korea, leading up to the tour.
“It’s just not feasible.” You shook your head, not backing down in front of the representative. “It would be different if it was a solo thing, but we’re just back up dancers. This is a trial run, isn’t it? We can’t justify uprooting our entire lives for a trial run.”
“Alright.” She finally sighed. “We can have you come in 3 month increments. Housing provided.”
In a deal that ended in shook hands and signed contracts, you left the building with Ria. “You think a lot will change?” You asked quietly.
“God I hope not.” She replied.
The flight to Seoul was long and uneventful, but at least you had your girls with you. Together you stepped into the agency building, memories of the masterclass coming back to you. You craned your neck as you passed any open door hoping to catch a glimpse. The day groaned on with paperwork, rules, choreographers, producers, run throughs. You were thoroughly exhausted, feeling wrung out like a wet rag. Despite the exhaustion, you were thrumming with nervous excitement. They’re in here somewhere.
“Alright ladies, rest up in here for a bit, then we’ll explain the logistics of the tour in a few minutes.” The guide who will now be your new manager smiled warmly, leading the group to a practice room. It was a little smaller than the other one but still just as pristine.
“What do you think we’re waiting for?” Abby asked, plopping down on the ground.
“I don’t know.” You replied, plopping down on the ground next to her, fully laying down. “Probably gonna give us more shit to sign.” You were getting impatient. “When do you think we’ll meet the members?” You huffed, rolling over onto your stomach.
When Ria opened her mouth to speak, the door swung open. You scrambled up to your knees.
In walked a manager, followed by the members of Enhypen. The very men you’ve been employed to dance with. The air in the room split. The group members walked in with relaxed smiles and polite expressions greetings.
Your heart stopped in your chest. Your palms clammed up immediately, your eyes were blown. This is the third time that Jungwon walks into a space, and his eyes fall directly to you. Whether it’s respect or recognition, the warm intensity of his eyes knocked the breath out of you. You scrambled up to your feet as he walked toward you.
“Glad to see you again!” He smiled brightly, reaching for your hand. You took it, nearly fumbling as you gave him a weak handshake.
You glanced around the room, seeing the members of Enhypen try to make small talk with your petrified, star struck teammates. You would have found it funny if you weren’t in the same predicament. Not Ria though. She’s a professional at keeping cool as she easily made small talk with Jake.
“Yeah, I…” you coughed. “I was really surprised when we found out we’d be working with you guys. It’s really an honor, you are really-“
“C’mon.” He chuckled cutting you off gently. “I’m just Jungwon. We’re teammates for the next year, you don’t have to sing my praises.”
But how could you not? You looked down, seeing he still hasn’t let go of your hand. You pulled it out of his grip. He let go, yet an odd blank look flashed in his eyes.
“I’ll try not to.” You offered a timid smile. “Sooo…” you turned away to look at the girls, the panic in their faces easing into a respectful excitement. “Are we starting today?”
“Today?” Jungwon shook his head. “No of course not! You just landed, you’re tired. We just came in to meet our partners for the comeback.”
“Oh.” God I really suck at interactions don’t I?
“You know,” Jungwon turned to you, his eyes oddly soft. “I’ve seen Engenue’s covers.”
Although it’s not news, the fact that he’s seen your work still brings and excited shiver down your spine. You shrug off your flusteredness. Or try to.
“Technically we’re called KORA now.” You say, nearly spitting the word. You hated that they asked you to change the team name.
“Either way.” Jungwon continued. “You really stand out, you know that?”
Oh my God he thinks I stand out. Does that mean good or bad? Wait what if he means I need to step out? You look back towards Ria, in attempt to hide your burning face but dammit every single wall is mirrored. You caught his warm gaze in the mirror. “I…how many of our covers have you watched?”
“Just a few.” He shrugged. “That’s why I know I could count on you for a good demonstration.“
“Thank you!” You muttered, barely containing your own embarrassment. “I honestly don’t know how to accept this recognition and I’m nowhere near as talented as you are-“
“You don’t have to be so nervous around me.” Jungwon took a step back to your relief. “You’re really talented and have potential for a lot of work here.”
You smiled back finally, turning your head to look at him. The butterflies in your stomach eased just a little. “I’m not there yet. Still have a lot of things to perfect.”
“There’s always room for improvement.” He said, his eyes lighting up. “I can mentor you for some time! You know, get you where you want to be.”
Your eyes widened. “You’d do that? Wouldn’t it be too much on you?”
“Well, I offered, didn’t I?” He answered with a light chuckle. “It’s no different than the masterclass. Just think about it, okay?”
As much as you loved Jungwon, you wanted this interaction to be over. Being the subject of his undivided attention was just too much. But the opportunity was too good to pass up. “Alright.” You have a slight nod. “I’ll think about it. Thank you.”
The time went on with polite conversation with the rest of the and a few attempts at the new dances. Getting acquainted with Enhypen slowly felt easier, even if your eyes were glued to Jungwon nearly the entire time. How could you not stare when he is that stunning? Or more accurately, how can you not stare back?
—-
The next day, you stood with your team just outside the practice room doors, dressed in casual practice wear with bags and water bottles. You stared at the door, barely breathing.
“Walk in first.” Abby pushed you to the door of the practice room where the men were practicing, their stomps and loud music audible through the door.
“Why do I have to do it?” You hissed. “You do it!”
“You’re the senior!”
“Ria’s older than me!” You argued, pushing back.
“Hey, no, don’t rope me into this.” Ria spoke up. “You’re the team lead.”
You stared back at her. She crossed her arms, not budging.
“Ugh, fine.” You opened the door of the room, peaking in to find ENHYPEN practicing.
Your jaw almost hit the floor. Seeing the boys in concert was one thing. Seeing them perform up close was another. Mesmerized, you took a hesitant step forward. The track cut, filling the space with the boys’ labored panting.
“Let’s take a quick break.” Jungwon breathed out, grabbing his waterbottle off the floor taking a greedy swig. You couldn’t help but stare at him, the way his Adam’s apple bobbed when he drank. He was a Greek god in a black wifebeater tight against his toned chest, sweat glistening off his bare shoulders. Oh my god oh my god oh my god. You looked away into the mirrored wall. Your reflection stared back at you confirming how hard you’re blushing.
“Thank God!” Jake sighed, before looking up, catching you and the rest of the girls walking in. “Oh!” A friendly smile spread across his face. “Hey guys!”
“Hi!” Ria smiled back, letting her bag drop to the floor. The team quickly followed suit, shedding bags and hoodies. You yanked your sweater over your head, leaving yourself in a cropped mock neck.
Jungwon nearly choked on his water. “Oh hi ladies!” He set down his bottle with a sheepish smile. “The choreographer just stepped out, but we can get started now.”
The practice went well. Jungwon was attentive, professional, and most of all strict. And you loved it. There was nothing better than a disciplined teacher who requires perfection.
“Keep your elbow in on the turn.” He said, pressing your elbow into your side. You nodded, fixing it.
“Keep your head up.”
“Posture, posture!”
“That turn needs to be tighter.”
Every correction came with a touch. A hand on between your shoulder blades, a finger under your chin, a light scuff at your feet. By the end of practice, you were sore, out of breath, and deeply humbled.
“Let’s call it a day.” Heeseung huffed. “I need sleep.”
You slump onto the floor against the mirror, focusing on your breathing. Your head swam with exhaustion and a deep satisfaction after a good training session. You went for a sip of water from your bottle only to find it empty. You groaned, pushing your self up to steal Ria’s water bottle.
“You okay?” You heard a deep voice above you. You looked up.
“Oh, Ni-Ki!” You scrambled to your feet. “Hi!”
“Woah slow down.” He chuckled, helping you steady yourself against the mirror. “You good?”
“To be honest I got a headache and I’m cockeyed and I can hear colors.” You gave a self deprecating laugh.
“That’s because you’re dehydrated.” He chuckled. He held out an unopened waterbottle. “Here.”
You took the water with a grateful smile. As the two groups slowly filed out of the room, a warm hand clasped your arm. You froze, turning around to see Jungwon, his zip up open, that damn tank top underneath. Your eyes momentarily flicked down to his torso, immediately embarrassed.
“Yes Jungwon?” You asked, suddenly looking anywhere but him. “Was there something you needed?”
His tired eyes brightened. “You’re still nervous.” He chuckled. “Have you thought about my offer?”
“Oh, uh..” you frantically looked out to your friends. “Yeah. Yeah I did.”
“And?” He tilted his head, his gaze expectant.
“I’d be honored if you’d mentor me.” You smiled, to mask or ease your nerves. His eyes softened into that kind warmth you found yourself obsessing over.
“Perfect!” He let go of your arm, instead leading you out of the building with a hand on your back. “Then we’ll start tomorrow. Stay after practice a bit, okay?”
“‘Kay!” You grinned, excitement already buzzing in your veins as he walked you to the manager’s awaiting car. “I’ll see you then.”
“Good night!” He smiled, helping you into the car.
On the way home, you leaned against Ria’s shoulder, feeling warm and fuzzy, but also strung with a giddy joy. Starting tomorrow, you will be a protégée to one of the biggest kpop idols in the world.
—-
The next day, practice was as expected. Jungwon led with an iron grip and a dimpled smile, confusing but also disarming you. He was introducing the title track choreography. The one that may get the most hate, if Bite Me from before was any indication.
“Guys, Taste is the title track, we need to get it right.” He warned, showing us the dance video again. “This is the pair dance, so we’ll need you girls to really put in some effort, this dance isn’t easy. Pair up and remember. This is your partner for the full tour so please be kind and accommodating.” Jake looked to Ria who was already looking at Heeseung.
Jungwon looked up at you immediately. His eyes softened for just a second. “You’re with me.” He said it with so much confidence you had no room to argue.
You gave a hesitant nod. It only made sense, right? He’s your mentor now, of course he’d partner with you. Yet you felt a cold pang in your stomach at his insistence. Would you be able to keep up?
“Alright, let’s run it again, with partners now.” Jungwon called, leading you to your spot by the elbow. “Music!”
It didn’t get easier from there. You’d hoped that partnering with Jungwon would be simpler, considering you’re most familiar to him. But that familiarity came with a harsher standard of perfection.
“Posture!”
“Focus!”
“Come on, you know better!” He barked out corrections like a drill sergeant.
“Yes Jungwon.” You mumbled.
Jungwon finally announced a five minute break. You heaved a pant as you took a sip of water, every muscle tight with overexertion.
Jungwon slumped next to you, shoulder to shoulder. As if on instinct your back immediately straightened. He looked at you with a drained grin.
“Relax.” He chuckled. “We’re on break.”
“I know.” You offered a smile, the butterfly’s in your stomach never fading. “It’s habit now.”
“Hm.” He took a sip of water. “You do know I’m only hard on you because you’re already a great dancer, right?”
You nodded. “Yeah I know.”
“So you’ll stay after?”
The thought made your heart jump with excitement. A solo training session with THE Yang Jungwon. Your bias. The object of your delusions. He turned his head at your silence, eyes finding yours. The eye contact made made you lose your ability to think.
“Uh..” you mumbled, trying to sound nonchalant, but your shaking voice gave you away. “Yeah. Of course.”
“Good.” He nodded with a smirk. “Don’t expect me to go easy on you though.” Damn.
“I know.” You sighed.
Practice wrapped up quickly after that. It almost felt like the dances were rushed through.
Jungwon shrugged when you brought it up after practice. “We still have tomorrow to refine. We just needed a basis.”
Ria walked up behind you, slinging her arm around your shoulder as you grabbed your bag off the floor. “Ready to go back?”
“I’m not going yet.” You replied, zipping up the bag.
“What?” She furrowed her brow. “Why not?”
“Jungwon asked me to stay for some training after.” You replied, heat spreading through your cheeks.
A slow knowing grin crept its way onto Ria’s face. “One on One?” She wiggled her brows. “With Jungwon??”
“I know!!” You shoved her lightly, face now rivaling a traffic light. “Go home.”
“You better call me and tell me everything.” She laughed, walking toward the exit. “Have fun!”
Heaving a sigh to settle your stomach, you turned back into the practice room. Jungwon was already waiting, fiddling with his phone, leaning against the cool mirror. His hoodie was half way on, one shoulder bare in a way that made you think, what’s the point of wearing the hoodie at all? Lean, toned, messy hair, he was perfect. He looked up, his gaze finding yours. His eyes were commanding, sharp like he was measuring your every breath.
“You ready?” He asked breaking the silence, his voice a mix of friendly and professional.
“I guess so.” You forced a smile through your nerves. “What song’s first?”
“We’re not working on choreo.” He set his phone down, walking toward you. His hand pressed between your shoulder blades, straightening your back. His touch sent electricity down your spine. He tapped your chin, a reminder to keep your head straight. “We’re working on technique.”
—
Jungwon was an amazing teacher. During practice with everyone, he was tough but fair. But with just you, he was a different kind of monster, one with sky high expectations and an intolerance for tiredness. And if you were too tired, he would grab your arms and position you himself. His touch was firm, yet lingering. The heady mix sent your brain and heart into confusion, flustered, but with a gnawing worry about being professional. He was exactly the kind of mentor you hoped for, but damn it was so distracting.
For the next two weeks, you’d stay with him after hours, and he did not show mercy, even if your run through was good. Nothing impressed him, there was always room for improvement and you were okay with it. You wanted that perfection as much as he did. You were a willing student if nothing else.
That came to ahead one day. You were exhausted. Spent. Barely standing. And Jungwon was the exact image of a strict instructor. Your sequence was perfect. But..
“I’m not worried about the accuracy of the choreo right now. I’m worried about how you keep locking up.” He folded his arms, with a determined frown. “We aren’t stopping until you get the turn right. Do it again.”
The comment made you crumple in defeat. You’ve already done the turn like 9 times, each time spinning faster, keeping your back straighter, your moves tighter. Yet he was never satisfied.
“Again.”
“Again.”
“Again.”
“Jungwon..” You protested, shaking with exhaustion. “If you don’t like how I do the turn then do it yourself and show me.”
He raised his brows at you. His cold gaze made you freeze in place. Never in your life did you ever think to lip off to Jungwon, and the fact that you did shocked both him and you. You swallowed nervously, hating the silence that followed. It would have been better if he yelled, or made a mean comment, anything to drown out your racing heart but no. He never yelled, he was never rude. Right now you almost wished he was instead of staring into you. Damn, for someone with such a cute face, he had some piercing eyes.
“Alright.” He murmured, his lips forming into a tight lipped challenging smirk. “I’ll do it. But if I show you, I’m not letting you go home until you do 5 perfect turns.”
“Fine.” You replied, folding your arms against your chest, your voice meeker than you intended.
“Watch.” He said, playing the track from the chorus.
He entered the sequence seamlessly, as if he created it himself. He moved like water, each step and movement smooth and deliberate, sharp enough to show all the tiny nuances that nobody but you or your team would catch. Then came the turn. The turn, sharp and quick in nature, still had to be fluid gentle. He landed on his right leg, tensing it just enough to catch himself, but never locking. That shit was hard to nail. And yet, he did it perfectly with no warm up.
“Wow.” You muttered.
Jungwon made it look too easy. His sharp eyes flicked to you as he caught his breath. You turned away quick, trying to hide your shameless awe. He smiled.
“Your turn.” He said, motioning with his head. “Center.”
You had no choice but to comply, waking forward shoulders slumped. And immediately.
“Posture!”
With a silent groan you straightened up, trying your best not to look as tired. You followed his moves to a tee, keeping the same slight tension in the right thigh, fluid movement, sharp transition, turn. You gritted your teeth, willing yourself not to lock up again. You looked up at him, eyes hopeful, pleading.
Jungwon’s stony expression melted into one of calm satisfaction. His approval went directly to your chest, blooming a deep pride that you were finally able to impress him. Yang Jungwon is impressed by me. Oh my God, I finally did it.
“That was beautiful. See?” He smiled excitedly. “I told you you could do it. Now,” he tilted his head, his eyes darkened ever so slightly in a smug demand. “Do it again.”
Damn it. You hung your head. You hoped he’d forgotten his little rule, but no. He watched you like a hawk, following your every move like he was memorizing your form, with the slightest hint of pride in his face. Your tiredness was overtaken by a severe motivation to impress him.
“Again.” You pushed yourself harder.
“Again.” You spun faster.
“Perfect! Again!” With newfound energy you threw yourself into the routine, despite all of your muscles’ protest.
You executed the turn with precision and grace, landing on your right leg. But you didn’t land. Your foot caved under the strain. A sharp, screaming pain exploded through your ankle and spread like lightning. You gasped, falling to the floor with a sickening thud.
“FUCK!” You screamed into the ground, half in pain half in frustration.
You grit your teeth as you held your ankle, curled up on the floor. Shit. Of course. Of course it had to be on the last run through. Of course it had to be in front of Jungwon.You looked up at him, tears pricking your eyes in pain and shame.
Jungwon’s gaze was unreadable. You half expected him to tell you how disappointed he is, make you get up, but he turned on his heel and left the practice room. You stared incredulously at the empty spot on the floor where he stood, clutching your ankle, struggling to sit up. Did he just…leave me here? You swallowed a lump in your throat, fingers gingerly pressing the swollen tender bruise.
“Don’t try to move it.”
You looked up to see Jungwon walking back into the practice room holding a small red box. He knelt in front of you, opening the box with focus.
You opened your mouth to defend yourself. “Jungwon I-“
“Shhh.” He soothed, lifting your foot onto his knee. He pulled off your shoe with almost trembling care. It was overwhelming, seeing him like this. You furrowed your brow, willing the butterflies in your stomach to dissolve.
“You don’t have to-“
“It’s okay.” He said quietly. “Let me help.”
He checked the sprain, gingerly pressing his fingers against the swelling bruise, wincing sympathetically when you yelped in pain.
“I know.” He murmured, gently rubbing the featherlight circles into the tender skin. “I know it hurts. You’re okay.” He reached into the box, pulling out a roll of gauze. He met your gaze with grounding concern.
“This is gonna hurt.” He warned as he took your hand, guiding it to his arm. “Grab on.” He said. “Squeeze if it hurts too much, okay?”
You nodded, flustered at his sudden tenderness. He set your foot in the correct angle. You gasped in pain, digging your fingers into the flesh of his forearm as he gently maneuvered the joint.
“Just a little more.” He whispered, “I’m almost done, you’re doing so good.”
You froze. Is.. he talking me through it? Your face burned wildly, nearly forgetting the pain until he turned your ankle some more. You let out a pained whimper, clutching onto his arm. He froze for a moment, eyes widening. You must have squeezed his arm too tight.
You watched him wrap your set ankle in gauze, his movements slow and almost reverent. It amazed you how quickly he went from strict and unforgiving, to tender and attentive. He pressed a cooling pack against your ankle.
“Can you stand?” He asked, pulling you up just enough to find your footing.
“I think so.” You mumbled, trying to take a step. Pain shot through your ankle. “I don’t think so.”
Jungwon sighed, eyebrows knitting together in thought. “Come here.” He took your arm, wrapping it around his broad shoulders, helping you stand upright. “Put your weight on me.”
You shook your head. “No it’s okay,” you tried to sound more polite than flustered. “I don’t want to burden-“
He wrapped his arm tightly around your waist. “Come on.” He said, helping you hop along to the exit.
Instead of a manager’s van, he led (carried) you to his own car, situating you in the passenger seat. You curled in, a gnawing feeling of guilt marring your stomach. He didn’t have to do all this. I’m just a back up dancer.
“I don’t want to be a bother.” You murmured staring into your lap. “You need rest too.”
He didn’t even look at you. “It’s not a bother.” He said quietly.
The drive was mostly quiet, intense, charged with electricity and something darker. When you arrived at your building, he insisted of helping you get into your dorm. You agreed reluctantly, knowing you’ll never make it on your own, but very nervous about him being inside your dorm. Shit, did I leave anything out? You mentally checked your entire dorm, hoping and begging your posters of him were put away, not hung up yet.
“Make sure you stay off of it for a while.” He said flatly. “Can’t have another injury risk.”
“Okay.” You nodded as he helped you to your bedroom. “Thanks for your help, Jungwon.” You added quietly, still embarrassed at the tenderness he showed you.
He didn’t look at you, as he grabbed his keys. “Yeah, not a problem. See you tomorrow.”
“Bye.” You called after him, waiting for the front door to click shut before immediately dialing Ria to fill her in.
“Dude.” You muttered as soon as you heard her sleepy greeting.
“What?”
“You’ll never guess what happened.” You filled her in on exactly everything that happened, the dance, the fall, the care. For that entire hour, you and Ria squealed over his concern, overanalyzing every word not even remembering the pain.
—-meanwhile
Jungwon gripped his steering wheel, knuckles white. He was like a wire pulled taught, barely even breathing, clenching his teeth so hard he shook. Tears shone in his eyes.
“I hurt her.” He whispered to himself, voice tight with anger at himself. “I fucking hurt her.”
A hot tear spilled over his cheek. He hated himself for hurting what he worshipped most. But all he wanted was for you to be a perfect mirror image. An exact match to him, something trained by him for him. Was that so wrong? No. He has a right to you, to your perfect form, affection, recognition.
His heart broke as he recalled how you looked at him, wide eyed and teary, pained from the fall, flustered from his care. It took all of his self restraint to not pull you close, kiss the pain away, wipe your tears, tell you he’s not going anywhere. Yet he reveled in the way you looked at him like he was your savior.
“The kpop industry is cruel.” he whispered to himself. “If I don’t break her myself, the industry will destroy her.” A twisted justification for his obsession bloomed in his mind. “And if she must break, she must be broken gently and put back together with the utmost care like she deserves. She deserves all the care. All the love and devotion. Nobody’s able to provide that.” His lips curled into an odd smile as he admired the satin hairtie stretched around his wrist, a memento of you stolen from your dorm. “Nobody but me.”
The moment he stepped into his home he tapped into the live feed, finding your sleeping form curled around the plushy he gifted you. You were so beautiful, so fragile. He couldn’t help but feel guilty, seeing y ou wince in pain in your sleep. “Just wait a little longer, my angel.” He whispered with dark tenderness, stroking the screen. “I’ll make everything better. I promise.”
-To be continued…
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