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Horribly vulnerable and uncomfortable, want to hide under fictional dad's coat please

I'm Thorn/Anomaly/Prince, I'm an adult autistic genderqueer guy who mainly uses he/it/they pronouns. This is where I post and reblog selfshipping and fictional crush things.

Included in my f/os are Priest Entity Nada, Integra Hellsing and Cecil Stedman. I have other f/os as well, plus fictional family. However, I don't keep a full public list on here. I'm ficto and, although it's not always the case, for simplicity's sake it's easier to label myself nonsharing/selective sharing.

For 18+ orientated content see my sideblog @thornheated (minors please dni with that sideblog), my main blog is @thornheartless.

The userboxes below were made by myself. You can use the fae one with credit to my main blog but I'd prefer for other people to not use the Nada one at all.

#thorn talks #thorn answers #comfort #pup time #resources #crush tag #thorncore

So uhm. Making a separate sideblog so most regression stuff will no longer be here. There's a few reasons why but they mostly come down to comfort.

#my regression isn't limited to small child so older age moments will still float around here though probably #so the pup time tag shall stay #also might just still post an occasional younger regression thing in relation to fictional parent #idk #pup time #thorn talks

Society has progressed past the need for my biological father, I should 100% be adopted by Alu.card so I have a vampire father instead

#🌕#pup time #thorn talks

I am once again too scared to put regression related stuff on main so am running here. Anyway, me when I'm suddenly like 14 again in my mind which is one of the worst ages to regress to for me. Because with younger ages I couldn't fully grasp the weight of all of my trauma, plus some of it hadn't happened yet, so it's more of an actual coping mechanism even if still flashback-induced. This just sucks though. Mostly now I am just stuck with the urge to obsessively listen to Three Days Grace because yeah, that's what I spent half my time doing. I am angry at the world and my family and myself. 👍

#pup time #thorn talks

It's too 1am so not doing it now, might make Alu.card in S.ims for dad cuddles after I sleep

#thorn talks #🌕#pup time #currently watching char.lie and lo.la to settle to sleep

I can feel myself slowly being dragged into the Pup Zone like "nOOOOOO!! But also yeah I want hug from vampire dad and I want to colour and play games and–"

#thorn talks #🌕#pup time #genuinely have no idea what is setting this off aaaaaaAAAAAAAKH #for anyone who is not aware or has not guessed #that is uh. what i refer to my a.ge re.gression as #i prefer to dance around it being that because it makes me feel incredibly awkward because don't fit in #people expect it to be all playful and smiling but it's not for me #was a very scared child and it made me aggressive towards people and never got to be a 'normal' child #carries over to the re.gression because usually caused by flashbacks or other trauma things #ends up with me feeling scared and small and trying to adult but my feelings are too big and i'm too small #or i'm just blank because the aggression faded when i was 14-15 and i get stuck there sometimes #this feels embarrassing to talk about but it won't get less embarrassing if i hide it completely #need space to talk about it since trying to ignore it makes it harder to cope and more unpleasant but working with it can make it go nicer #involuntary thing but now i can choose unconditional love for myself when i didn't get that before #(disclaimer that i'm not really aggressive now. just 'bark' sometimes rather than bite and am scared of conflict actually)

#pup time

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