#purs rant

[puraiuddo]

oh this is a little overdue since i found out about 2 weeks ago but ive been processing so at any rate

I would like to send a profound and heartfelt

FUCK YOU

to the dozens of doctors I’ve had over the years (starting, according to my parents, before I could even remember) who have written me off for decades as a hypochondriac with attention seeking behavior, bipolar, psychosomatic manifestations—you fucking name it, they’re fucking said it—

because after finally having had fucking enough, with enough life experience to know that my abysmal health was not normal, had never been normal, and was not my fucking fault

I requested and thoroughly combed through my own fucking medical records, did my own fucking research, twisted as many arms as I had to for an evaluation and blood test

and low and fucking behold!!!

the geneticist that I finally managed to see diagnosed me with one of the most obvious and pervasive cases of a

Connective Tissue Disorder

that he’d seen in 50 years.

So, doctors, how about instead of always assuming children and woman are lying or overreacting or causing their own problems, you…

Do Your Fucking Job

and reign in your pride and your idiotic desire to prove that you know it all and instead exhaust all your resources, including an actual look at your patient’s medical history and sending them fucking elsewhere if you don’t know what’s wrong.

[puraiuddo]

anyways i love jazzprowl with all my heart but i’m on the fucking edge with the utter garbage coming out of ao3 (in particular) and i am this 👌🏼 fucking close to making a fucking list name dropping authors who post stereotypical or racist shit

like i try to assume the best of people and ignorance over maliciousness intent, i really do, but some of this shit is grade-school level “you don’t fucking say that??" and like there truly is no explanation other than willful ignorance at best

[puraiuddo]

me: maybe i’ll read some jazzprowl before i go to bed. hmmm… ok i’ll finally give this fic a try, even though i’m a bit worried about how a jp fic is going to handle this premise…

the fic:

me: yeah no it’s time to go to bed.

[puraiuddo]

i’ll probably lose followers for this and maybe start a fight but

god i fucking loathe 99% of cigarette smokers

miss me with all this “yada yada stress coping you’re being judgmental” or “yada yada the public space is for everyone and you don't get to say who does what where” shit

b/c nah fam go ahead and kill yourself in the most brutal way possible if you want! it's fucking sad, but i am all for people poisoning themselves if they want b/c that's bodily autonomy

but unless you (1) live alone/with other smokers in your own separate and distinct housing building and smoke inside or (2) smoke in some uninhabited field with no chance of anyone inhaling it...

you’re an asshole for endangering other people’s health and ruining their day with your fucking stench

god i am so fucking sick of having to slam the windows of my own fucking house closed on a beautiful fucking day or in the middle of the fucking night b/c the douchebag next door wants to smoke at all hours

i am so fucking sick of having to hold my breath walking down the street or having to avoid events at fairs or expos b/c people think that they have the right to puff god-awful smelling cancer dust on everything and everyone

i once saw someone have the gaul to say “smokers will smoke somewhere else if you ask nicely”

fuck you

i shouldn’t have to “ask nicely” for you to spew a bunch of poisonous, foul smelling smog somewhere else

you should already fucking be somewhere else

you're choosing to smoke in a public space, people with asthma or sensitivities that are also there are not choosing to have their lungs close up or suffer migraines

addictions fucking suck, but having an addiction doesn't give you the right to inflict it on everyone else

[puraiuddo]

It's so fucking infuriating how anxiety is viewed as some lesser, even illegitimate form of mental health disability.

Just because you have experienced butterflies before public speaking or an interview and have ~gotten over it~ does not mean you now have even an inkling of what living with a severe panic disorder is like.

That shit is not the same as having such a severe neurological reaction to stress that your nervous system is convinced you're dying and is so overwhelmed by stimuli that it is patently unable to process anything outside of all-consuming, irrational panic.

And even when people are capable of conceptualizing that someone may have panic attacks and are sympathetic to that... it's like that's as far as they're willing to take it.

Anything short of a panic attack is suddenly something that can be ~overcome~ or ~powered through~ just like "everyone else".

Ironically, if you view severe anxiety rationally... is it not obvious that if someone is capable of experiencing the same level of a panic over getting a shot that you would experience when being held at gunpoint that... that level of hyperactivity might extend to literally every other aspect of their life?

Many cases of severe anxiety are a function of a defective parasympathetic nervous system. People with severe anxiety are as neurologically incapable of calming down as someone who suffers from seizures (the medications for the conditions literally overlap!!).

Medication, therapy, and coping mechanisms work as well as they do for any other health condition.

If I have to hear "get over it" or "just calm down" or any other idiotic platitude one more time I'm actually going to commit homicide.

[puraiuddo]

This is a PSA for those who think Yu-Gi-Oh is a children’s franchise.

I’d like to inform you that Yu-Gi-Oh 5Ds, specifically, is fucking gruesome.

The premise is that the world is a dystopia, where part of the population is confined to a destroyed island, fighting for food and shelter, while the majority of the population lives in a booming city sitting on the mainland

The plot is that there are 5 ‘signers’ who are able to summon an all powerful dragon and defeat the forces of evil and whatnot

Anyways, onto the violence. For times sake, I will include only that which happens to the main character, Yusei, in the first season.

He...

attempts to flee the island to confront one of his best friend who betrayed and robbed him of his two most valuable possessions so that said friend could live in the city and become duel King

succeeds in escaping and dueling his friend, but is apprehended by the police

is incarcerated & in prison is...

beaten

given a ‘marker’ (a golden tattoo that is permanently branded onto the skin on his face and transmits his location)

strip searched

subjected to an invasive scanning (for his signer mark) which electrocutes him twice at increasing severities

electrocuted eight times during a duel-to-the-death with the corrupt warden, he wins and is released

has to steal his possessions back from the police (b/c they had no intention of ever returning them to him) and is electrocuted DOZENS of times by police batons as he escapes

falls unconscious in a alley in the fanciest part of the city

is blackmailed into competing in a duel tournament (if he doesn’t all his friends on the island will be tortured) by the pseudo-president of the dystopia

is harassed and jeered by the crowd for his mark and upbringing

duels a woman in the tournament who can turn monsters tangible

is whipped by thorned vines

lifted into the air about 20ft and slammed to the ground

throughout the season collapses to his knees from pain from the signer-mark on his arm

Anyway ya’ll should watch it subbed b/c it’s brutal and damn good.

[puraiuddo]

i love it when people try to play the poor-olympics with me and then i pull out the ‘i’m basically homeless’ card and they shut right the fuck up

i don’t like minimizing people’s problems like that, but at the same time don’t you dare come to me and complain about how ‘poor’ you are and how your parent’s don’t ‘help’ when your grandparents are putting you through college free of charge (on the stipulation you don’t work and focus solely on school) and your mother can actually feed you things other than frozen chicken pot pie and hotdogs from the food pantry when you come “home” to the guest room and your father can do more than defer food to your aunt and uncle when you go to their house where he lives

like most of the time i just let this shit run off my back and i even joke about how fucked up it is b/c like what the hell can i do about it?? 

people critique me for being unfailingly optimistic, but if i was pessimistic i would have killed myself or become a drug addict like my parents a loooooong time ago

so like, anyways, yes, you have a right to complain about money-related things, but know your fucking audience when you mope about maybe paying for grad school unlike now when your grandparents are paying for college, or insurance on a car you were given, or the phone bill on a phone you were given

because right now i’m a full time student balancing 12 hours a week of work (calling people and asking for money for the school of all things) so that i can burn it all on small comforts like chocolate, necessities like soap and medications, my own travel over break via public transportation, on phone bills and installments for paying back the actual phone, and then save what i can only to give right back to pay off loans

just like... can you SHUT IT for 2 minutes and consider who you’re fucking talking to?

ok i’m done

[puraiuddo]

Rukia: *is hanging out in SS for 17 months while Ichigo is suffering from being unable to protect his loved ones*

Chad & Orihime: *trying their damnedest to become strong as to not worry Ichigo and protect him and immediately try to help him get his powers back when a feasible option comes into play*

IR fans: Rukia is the only one who has ever been there for him. 😩👎🏼☠️