delusional Dreams
ever have a dream so vivid, that you know you've experienced it before? its freighting, trapping, and intriguing at the same time.
for most of my life I've experienced, sleep paralysis and have had premonitions
It a scary and an incredibly debilitating feeling. One I would wish on my worse enemy...okay I lied that bitch can have them! repeatedly she can have them, oh and that waiter at Mimis who fucked up my food three times cause he didn't want to write it down! fuck that guy.
I have a reoccurring one....I have this dream at least once a month.
I'm in this beautiful clearing. there are flowers surrounding me. the smell is crisp that of fresh rain fall, poppy's, and magnolias. I feel the moisture from the moss between my toes. Its calming, relaxing, and peaceful. But that suddenly changes. I hear swift movement coming towards me. My heart starts to race and I feel fear setting in. I turn I start to run. I look behind me and I'm being chased by panthers. three large ones, I'm running through a forest, its now cold dark, the floor is sticky I can feel it on my feet. I run faster and faster, yet it never seems to be enough they are coming closer. I reach a cave thinking I'm trapped. They are going to kill me, but they block the entrance. They were never chasing me, they were protecting me. Peace suddenly runs through my veins, as one brushes against me. I feel at that moment something dark coming, my body gets cold, the fear returns. I cant see what it is cause the large panthers aren't letting it enter. they are growling, deeply as if I'm in danger, what ever they are protecting me from In this cave, I now feel its hands wrapped around my throat. My eyes are open, I'm in my bed, I'm gasping for air I feel the grip getting tighter and tighter. There is this large black mass above me. my hands are pulling at my throat trying to break free. I hear a growl and suddenly I'm free. I’m in panic. I’m crying. I'm scared. I know I'll have it again.
I’ve tried over the years to analyze it. Only recently have I started to figure out It me. I’m projecting this. I'm chasing myself. I'm my own worse enemy. I'm the demon that haunts me.
Sometimes we tend to be so hard on ourselves that we try to destroy the peace we have.
