I am living for Ilya *visibly queer icon* Rozanov and Shane *dude who happens to be gay* Hollander.
Shane, who grew up loved by his parents unconditionally, has been undiagnosed with autism and has made his entire life about ice hockey, has never thought about being gay as an identity. He already has a clear identity: Shane Hollander, Japanese-Canadian, beloved son and the country's best ice hockey player. He already experienced discrimination so he has no desire to engage in the queer community and fight against stereotypes, that do not apply to him. Nobody clocks him as gay because his interests don't suit the hateful narrative. His interests, hobbies or personality traits have never been particularly queer, so why should he make a problem out of it? He is fine and as long as nobody harms him, he feels no need to take part in public discussion, being a role model or simply being visibly queer
Ilya, on the other hand, is a victim of domestic violence, verbal abuse and childhood trauma. He lives in a country that criminalises queerness to an extent that being queer is dangerous. He is a sensible man who was called the f-slur when he was a teenager and probably also a child. His father controlled him so much that he learned not to speak or move on his own in public. He minimised his personal expression to suit his family's view on masculinity. At the same time, Ilya accepted his queerness as a major part of his personality, because casual sex has been his coping mechanism for many years, his close friends are queer, allies or women and his interest in partying fits into queer escapism. He is hyperaware of the discrimination of the queer community because it's a major realistic fear in his life.
In the moment when Ilya's no longer in active danger of being deported, he becomes the activist for queer representation in hockey. He wears make up, nail polish, dresses himself in expensive jewellery, uses hand bags and queer lingo. He can finally show his queer side. Yuna gets crazy over all the cooperation while David gives him little words of affirmation now and then. Ilya is living his queer joy, and Shane watches him from the site. Shane is Shane, dressed in the same black suit he always wears and smiles shyly when ask any questions. A reporter asks him what he's serving today and Shane just stares blankly. Then Ilya interrupts with an accent heavy "cunt".
