got tagged by soshaku to answer these really interesting and deep asks. let’s go.
1. Myers-Briggs type? (Do you think it applies to you, in your own opinion?)
i am ISFJ-T. and i think it really mostly fits. ( bold = applies, italics = applies sometimes, crossed = doesn’t apply )
strengths: supportive, reliable & patient, imaginative & observant, enthusiastic, loyal & hard-working, good practical skills.
weaknesses: humble & shy, take things too personally, repress their feelings ( currently working on that - lately i’ve been known as explosive ^^; ), overload themselves ( working on that as well and i’ve been successful to some small extent already ), reluctant to change, too altruistic
2. Belief system or philosophy you feel most connected to?
i don’t believe in any religions & am atheistic. i think that religions, even though there are quite a few aspects that are very laudable, are the main reason why there is so much hate and distrust on earth. i feel most connected to nature, and i’d probably say that paganism is the closest to what i would consider believing in. in philosophical aspects secular humanism, naturalism, pantheism & rationalism are closest to my heart.
3. When traveling, what are the things / locations that you like to explore when sightseeing?
nature, landscapes, remote places, old cities, museums, restaurants with local cuisine, historical places, churches. but i am generally interested in everything a place has to offer, as long as i’m interested in it.
4. A city or place that draws you in / repels you? (Why?)
i love really old cities with rich history or that are situated in beautiful regions ( i fall in love with cities & villages like all the time ). the only mega city that i really loved yet, and would like to revisit was london. berlin as well offered some new perspectives to me the last time i visited, but i am not head over heels with it. i don’t like mega cities too much. i like certain aspects of them, but as a whole they are too big for me. i like small cities mostly, cities around 10.000 to 100.000 inhabitants maybe, like weimar in my homeland thuringia, but also cities around 300.000 inhabitants like lübeck, erfurt, even my current home wiesbaden, cities that really are culturally rich. and i love teeny tiny villages in remote, beautiful areas & regions. i love them the most. and mountains, and the sea, and lakes and rivers and all kinds of landscapes. and on the contrary i don’t like industrial places too much ( even though they can be very impressive - especially old ones ). i guess i’m not really warming up to modern places, sterile places.
5. The book you’ve disliked the most?
i’ve read so many books, i can’t really remember one i disliked the most. strangely i’ve always read books that interested me, and if they didn’t i stopped reading them ( so i could never really create an opinion ).
6. Do you have something you could describe as an alter ego, a different mode of being? How / under what circumstances does it manifest itself?
i am constantly changing moods and modes. like i can never really trust myself or my ‘principles’. i often give advice that i don’t follow myself, even though i should and am aware that those advices are what i think is right. i can be very cruel to people, abandoning them or not giving them any sympathies/empathies, while on the other hand i sometimes feel too much empathy in certain situations. i’m egoistic, that’s not to say that it’s a bad thing, but it can lead to shutting out everything that is not immediately connected to me. actually i don’t know how i would define myself. i guess that every human being has various incarnations of various selfs inside them. i feel idealistic, but my ideals often are a two-sided sword. an alter ego... i think i haven’t yet met my alter ego. i see glimpses of it from time to time in other people, sometimes famous ones. but those are tiny pieces of a big puzzle i haven’t learned yet to solve.
7. Describe your relationship with yourself to an extent you are comfortable with.
my relationship with myself is very conflicting. i like myself to some extent on good days, but there are more days when i don’t like myself at all. i think i’ve got a very contradicting personality, and this results in a constant battle with myself.
8. What do you consider your character faults?
contradicting myself in thoughts and in actions ( especially when it’s work related... ), being fearful & anxious about my own personal future, self-hate & misanthropical tendencies, keeping problems and doubts to myself and rarely opening up about them to close friends and family, over-analyzing everything and lack of intuition and ignoring emotions whenever there are decisions to make. i also plead guilty for backbiting.
9. Is there a song or piece of music (or more than one) that in an abstract / sensory way has the ability to explain to some level, who you are? A feeling you want to convey?
so many songs. but at the moment i feel most connected to the music of balbina. especially her songs blumentopf ( german lyrics here ), wecker ( lyrics here ) do represent me a lot at the moment.
thank you, mae, for these very interesting questions! i took my time answering them carefully.
this time, i’m playing the tag game as well. i re-tag soshaku ( i’m curious about your answers ) and anybody who is interested in answering such thoughtful questions ( i’m a little bit intimidated to tag anyone, i don’t really know if you guys like such questions at all - but if i could choose some people, i’d tag genzai, felinebby, rain-falls-up, acquiredinstinct, naranzarian, lightatdusk & researchermusic . but you don’t have to do this and i certainly won’t demand such a thing of you )
