can y’all believe it’s been nearly sEVEN YEARS since saving mr banks came out and i still can’t believe that ralph told mr walt disney the ceo of walt disney^tm to fuck off basically to his face to protect his MRS I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO SHIP 5EVER
Listening to Newt Says Goodbye To Tina (from Fantastic Beasts), I am suddenly reminded how easily a final goodbye scene between Pamela and Ralph could have been the exact same. But then with Pamela promising to come back to personally hand over a copy of her new Mary Poppins book, as a gift for his daughter.
listen....mary poppins premiere night.. movie’s over, its dark out...pamela sitting on a bench outside in the grass, far away from everyone else, still crying a bit...ralph comes to sit next to her and comforts her... rubs the palm of her hand with his thumb and then eventually gently brings her hand up and presses a soft kiss on the back of her hand...all the while never turns his eyes away from her but she stares down, seemingly too consumed in her own thoughts to meet his gaze, in his eyes.. while in reality she’s too afraid to do so, she loves him and it scares her...
this is the summary of a fic i need desperately in my life.
Christmas was never a holiday that Mrs. Travers majorly celebrated back in her home country of England. There was never family around where she was, and quite frankly, like she stated to Ralph a couple months back, she didn’t have family that would realize wither she was half way around the world, or sitting in her living room in London. However, this christmas, was sure to be 100% different, in a good way.
It’s been two months since Pamela officially moved from England to America, particularly to the state of California, to live with Ralph, and his lovely eight year old daughter, Jane. Jane simply adored Pamela, not only as an author, but as a person, and could not believe that her father managed to somehow steal her heart. It was an absolute dream come true. Pamela was just loving Jane as well. They’d have numerous daily chats about the simple things, and Pamela even would teach Jane, on nice sunny days, when she could sit outside, how to make the little band stands, or parks, out of leaves, sticks, and small flowers.
“Would Mary Poppins allow the children to make these band stands, Pamela?” Jane asked one sunny morning, while her and Pamela were sitting on the grass making several around the area they were in.
“I believe she would let them in a sense of the word, yes. However, she’d make it quite clear to them that they had to clean up after themselves before coming back into the house, and turning everything clean, into something dirty!” Pamela answered, and smiled over at Jane, who was looking at her in pure, awe, and idolization. She always looked at Pamela that way, and as much as she wanted to tell herself she hated it, she didn’t. She loved it in every way she could.
Moments with Jane are ones that Pamela cherished, close to her heart. She always wanted a daughter, and now, in ways, she had one. She couldn’t believe that in only two short months all this change had come into her life. It was beyond a dream for everyone.
Today however, was a cold, rainy day, so everyone was stuck inside. Pamela hated days like these, shockingly enough, because it meant Jane was cooped up in the house all day with nothing to do. Yes, she would normally read, draw, or watch a movie, and she told her father and Pamela several times she was alright, she knew otherwise. Pamela saw a side to Jane, that she used to see in herself when she was younger, and to be honest, still saw now.
Looking out the window, and realizing today would be another boring day for Jane, Pamela thought of an idea she thought would make Jane happy. Thinking she’d have to check with Ralph on her little plan, she stood from her office chair, where she was working on another book, took her hand and smoothed her brown wool suit, which was similar to the one she was wearing when she first met Ralph months ago in L.A. After checking herself in her floor length mirror, she nodded, and ventured off to go find where Ralph was.
Sure enough, after searching for a short while, she found Ralph in their bedroom, putting on his tie. She woke earlier than him that morning to continue on her book, so she did not get the chance to see what he was wearing yet today and vise vera. Stopping at their doorway, she leaned against the wall, and crossed her arms, smiling. She loved watching him. Especially in the mornings while he was getting ready for work. He looked so handsome, not that he wasn’t all the time, but the mornings were when he looked his absolute best to her. Watching him, as he finished and put on his suit jacket, she stood straight again, and began to walk into the room, while uncrossing her arms slowly.
Coming up behind him, gently, not to scare him, Pamela smiled and stood, until he looked back into the mirror, and noticed her. Ralph gave himself a small smile before slowly turning around to greet her a good morning. His arms wove around her waist, which pulled her a small step closer to him, and their eyes locked as Pamela brought her arms up around his neck.
“Good Morning, Mrs.” Ralph slowly spoke before going in, and giving his love a gentle, loving kiss on the lips.
“Good Morning, Darling. Thank you for speaking correctly with your greeting.” Pamela replied, teasing him. He always greeted her by “mornin, Mrs.” ,” G’Mornin” or something that wasn’t perfect English, so she simply loved teasing him about it. Proper English was a necessity to her, and although she was trying to tone it down here in America, it still caused her trouble at times. “Is Jane off to school already?” she asked whilst pulling out of his embrace and going over to her vanity to check her lipstick, and apply more if needed.
“She is. She left about half an hour ago. I’m surprised you didn’t see her coming down the main hallway with Shirley her driver.” Ralph leaned against their bed post, and watched Pamela fumble with her makeup on her vanity.
“Oh, I was in my office all morning, engrossed on working on the book. I’ll have to apologize to Jane when she comes home later.” Pamela sighed and put her lipstick back in her vanity before standing again, and turning back to Ralph. “Listen, I had an idea earlier that I wanted to ask you about before you went oft work.” She went over to Ralph, and stood next to him before they sat down on their bed.
“Of course, What is it, darling?” Ralph said whilst looking at her, adoringly. God he was so lucky to have her. He wished she believed him more often when he told her.
“I was thinking maybe when Jane comes home from school today, since it’s Friday, maybe we could decorate the Christmas Tree we picked out yesterday. It is being delivered today, isn’t it?” She turned her head towards him, and raised her eyebrow when she noticed how he was looking at her “What?” she cocked her head to one side a tad.
“You’re just gorgeous, that’s all.” Ralph looked and smiled when he saw her blush and look down a bit. He took his hand, and lifted her chin to have her look into his eyes. “Hey, I only speak the truth, Mrs.” He took her hand in his and kissed it. “As for your idea, I love it. I think Jane will also. It would good for her to do something fun, as she’s going to be cooped up inside all evening due to the weather.”
“Yes. That is why I thought of it. She mentioned last night, she was hoping we could go outside today and build more parks, but as that isn’t going to happen, and she’ll be upset about it, I thought of the tree. It is the beginning of the holidays although Americans and their obsession for this Christmas holiday is something I don’t believe I shall ever understand. You people start it too bloody early. It’s not even thanksgiving and yet, we’re all here speaking nonsense about the christmas season-Anyway, Yes, it’ll keep Jane happy, and occupied, so, I believe it’ll work out.” She paused and stood before realizing something. “Oh! What time will you be home tonight? I hope Mr. Disney isn’t making you work absurd hours today.” Pamela rolled her eyes in disgust. He always got everything he wanted. She was sick of it.
“I’m not quite sure, babe. I’ll have to check my schedule. I’ll call you the minute I find out to let you know.” Ralph stood up, and chuckled a bit. “You know, he might just be joking around, but he’s trying to get me to ask you about film rights for your next book.”
“What?” Pamela turned to Ralph, crossing her arms, and giving him her signature Mrs. Travers kill look. “Never. AGAIN.” She turned on her heels, and walked out of their bedroom, and began walking downstairs with Ralph following close behind her.
Together, they walked into the kitchen, to get some breakfast. Pamela went and sat down joining Ralph at the table after getting her normal cup of morning tea. She watched him and sipped her tea in silence as he had his morning breakfast of oatmeal and orange juice. She sighed contently, and turned her head to glance out the window into the backyard, where she saw the in-ground pool, and the swing set for Jane just sitting there, with the rain pouring down all around it. She blinked, knowing she’d be brought back to a memory if she didn’t act quick. She turned her head back to face Ralph, and found him staring at her.
“Yes?” She asked while standing up, placing her empty tea cup into the sink, and leaning against the counter.
“Nothing.” Ralph stood, went to the sink, did the same but with his plate and glass.
He then went over to where Pamela was standing and kissed her cheek before leaving the room with a “see you later!” and walking out the door. Once alone in the house, yet again, Pamela sighed and walked back into her office, but didn’t feel like writing more of her book at the current moment. So, she took her purse, and keys, and decided to go shopping. Why? She had no idea. She hated americans and dealing with them, especially when it came to shopping, but she thought it would be better to just go and get the holiday shopping done with now, before thanksgiving came and it really became even worse. She never saw it before, but she believed every word Ralph had told her when she asked about it. Leaving the house, with her umbrella up, and walking down the street to the nearest mall, she began thinking about new ideas for her book, when her mind suddenly shifted to Jane. She realized she had no idea what to get an eight year old girl. Jane seemed to have everything. Arriving at the mall, Pamela took a breath and began shopping.
She searched her mind, and everything in the stores for what seemed like hours before finally giving up. She bought everything she wanted for Ralph and his sister, and even for herself, but she still couldn’t think of what to get Jane. Leaving the mall, and pulling out her umbrella, it finally hit her. Polly. Thats it. That’s what she was going to get Jane. Polly. She remembered Jane telling her one of the first days she was with her that she wished she had a parrot headed umbrella, just like Mary Poppins did, so this was perfect. She just had to find someone to make an exact replica of what the umbrella looked like, and that was it! Pamela quickly walked back home, went into her office, and rummaged through her paper work to find a clear, colored picture of book Mary’s parrot-headed umbrella, Polly. Once she found it, and approved of the drawing and coloring of it, she grabbed her purse yet again, along with her umbrella, and set off down the street to the nearest shop who would hopefully make Jane’s gift.
Arriving back at home, almost an hour later, with everything in the making for Jane’s christmas gift, Pamela was surprised to see Ralph’s Disney limo parked outside their driveway. She quickly walked into the house, set her things down, and called out his name.
“Ralph?” She walked into the living room and looked around, before suddenly feeling his presence behind her. Turning quickly, so she wouldn’t jump, she faced him and smiled. “Oh, hello. Why are you home so soon? You don’t have the rest of the day off, do you?” She asked him, deep down hoping he’d say he did. She couldn’t wait to tell him what she thought of for Jane’s present.
“Actually, Mrs. I am. Everyone finished early, so I thought I’d come back and be here for when the christmas tree arrives and for when Jane comes back from school.” He smiled at her, and watched as she took a seat on the two seater couch, across from the fireplace. God, she was gorgeous.
“I see. Well, it’s just as good that you’re here, because I have something I need to tell you.” She turned her head to look in his direction, and saw immediately as he sat next to her, that his face became deep with concern and worry. “Oh! No, I’m fine. Healthy as ever. I promise.” she took his hand in hers and looked down while their hands intertwined. “I just wanted to tell you what I did this morning!” she looked back up, and saw him relax and smile.
“You scared me for a moment there, Mrs. Alright. What did you do? Write more things for your book?” As Ralph asked, he raised an eyebrow at her. It was rare she got this excited over something so small, especially at the holiday time. She never was one to like them, if he recalled from when she told him months ago.
“For once, no. I decided, even though it is quite early, to go christmas shopping and get it over and done with.” Pamela paused and sat up straight as she turned a tad to face more towards Ralph. “I bought everything for everyone I needed to buy for. However, I had some trouble with Jane’s gift, until right as I was leaving it occurred to me what to get for her. Remember when her and I first met, after she fell out of shock and began talking with me, and happened to mention that she wished she had a parrot-headed umbrella like Mary Poppins’ one?” She glanced up at Ralph, who only nodded curiously, before she continued. “Well, i took a picture of it, to the nearest wood shop of course, and they are going to make an exact replica of the umbrella, which she will be able to actually use as well!” She finished excitedly and fully turned towards Ralph who was smiling widely at her.
“You know she is going to LOVE that, right? She might even cry. That is going to be one special gift, let me tell you.” Ralph kissed Pamela’s cheek as he stood and saw a truck pull up in-front of the house. “Oh. I think the christmas tree is here, darling. Do you want me to go outside and tell them where to put it?” He turned back towards Pamela who stood and walked over next to him and looked out the window.
“Please, if you don’t mind.” She smiled, and as he went outside to deal with the men, Pamela went into her office to try and focus herself on her book.
It wasn’t for another hour or two, until Pamela sat back in her chair, and gave a sigh of relief. Finally another chapter was written, and ready to be brought to her publicist. As she pulled the paper out of the type writer, and stood up, she saw Jane being wheeled up the walkway in her wheel chair. She put her papers down, left her office, and went to the front door to meet Jane as she came closer to the house.
“Pamela!” Jane shouted, happily, when she saw her waiting at the door for her.
Being brought into the house, Pamela bent down and have the little eight year old girl a warm, long, hug. “Hello, Jane. Did you have a good day at school?” Pamela asked while standing behind Jane’s chair, and wheeling it into the kitchen where Ralph was reading a paper.
“I did! I had my writing and journalism class today! It’s my favorite class! I talked about you to my class! They all love Mary Poppins-book Mary Poppins of course.” Jane paused and turn to look at Pamela with a smile, she just adored her way too much. Turning back around, she looked over at her father who was watching both of them. “Hi Daddy!!”
“Hello, sweetie. Seems like you had a good day!” Ralph smiled at his daughter, as Pamela moved and sat beside Ralph, and she nodded in return, and began telling the both of them of her day.
When finished, Pamela, Ralph, and Jane all went into the living room, where Jane saw the plain christmas tree waiting there for all of them to begin to decorate. She gasped excitedly, and grabbed some garland to place around the tree, and all together, all three of them began to decorate their first christmas tree together. Taking a step back, Pamela smiled while looking at Ralph and Jane putting the tree decorations on. As much as she wanted to hate this, her mind, and her heart were telling her the exact opposite. This was what she always wanted. And now, she was lucky to have it.
Putting Jane to bed that night, Pamela walked into Jane’s room to find her watching Mary Poppins. She had gotten the film for her birthday, and watched it often, always pointing out the differences between the book and Film. Seeing Pamela walk into the room, Jane grabbed the remote and went to go turn it off when Pamela stopped her.
“No. You can keep it on.” She went and sat next to Jane on her bed, and put one arm around the little girl. “It is a very glamorous film. I’ve learned to live with it.” She looked down at Jane, and watched as she cuddled into Pamela, wrapping both her small arms around her waist.
“Pamela?” Jane looked up at Pamela after a couple minutes of watching the film together in silence.
“Yes?” she looks down to meet Jane’s eyes, prepared to answer any question the small one had.
“Thank you.” Jane moved closer to Pamela, and closed her eyes, becoming more comfortable in her arms.
“What for?” Pamela’s face looked at Jane with confusion.
Almost asleep now, Jane took a small breath, and whispered. “Mary Poppins. Thank you for her.” and with that Jane fell asleep in Pamela’s arms.
Pamela closed her eyes, and her heart grew with love. No-one has ever thanked her for something like Mary Poppins before, and it meant more to her than ever. Holding the small girl closer, Pamela as well, drifted into a peaceful slumber. ______________________________________
Christmas day came before anyone knew it. All the presents were all around the tree, and took up the majority of the room. Waking up in the morning, Ralph smiled to himself, as he glanced over at Pamela next to him, and noticed she was still asleep on her stomach, with her head turned to face his side of the bed. He leaned on his shoulder and watched her for a moment before gently moving over and leaning down to place a gentle kiss on her cheek. Watching her stir and open her eyes, he spoke softly.
“Merry Christmas, Mrs.” Ralph smiled and watched her smile and sit up.
“Happy Christmas, Dear.” She smiled back, and leaned over to kiss his lips gently. “Would Jane still be asleep? It is still quite early..” she glanced over at the clock to see it read 7:25am.
“Oh no. Probably not. She wakes early on christmas. Should we go see?” Ralph got out of bed, and straightened his Pajama shirt, before turing and watching Pamela get out of their bed, and grab her robe and slippers and put them on.
“Lets go.” Pamela walked out of their room and began heading to Jane’s room down the hall.
Entering jane’s room, Pamela found that Jane was indeed, awake. She was sitting up in her bed, reading the current book in the Mary Poppins series she was on, “Mary Poppins Comes Back.” with a huge smile on her face. She loved this series so much. Looking up, and noticing Pamela and her father at her doorway, she put her bookmark in her book, and placed it beside her.
“Merry Christmas!!” Jane exclaimed excitedly with a huge smile on her face.
“Merry Christmas, darling.” Ralph went over to her and kissed her cheek, before helping her get up and into her chair. “Do you want to open presents dressed or in your pajama-“ Ralph began before being stopped by Pamela.
“Ralph.. we should get dressed first. We have your family coming over in a few hours. I’d much rather look presentable, and not rush my routine, thank you very much. It’s extensive.” She looked over at Ralph, and gave him a serious look.
“Yeah, Daddy. Jeez, we all have routines, listen to Pamela. I’m on her side.” Jane looked up at her father, who was standing behind her.
“You’re always on her side, Jane. You love her too much.” Ralph joked, and everyone laughed. “alright, lets go get changed then. How about Pamela and I go get ready first, then Pamela, if you want you can come and get Jane ready, that is if she wants you too?” He looked down at Jane.
“Yes! I can finish reading my chapter in the book while you guys go. It’s very good Pamela! but of course, you wrote it, so it could honestly be ants on the paper, and still be fantastic and a best seller.” Jane smiled as Pamela handed Jane her copy of her book, and smiled back at her.
“Thank you, my dear. We’ll be back in a bit.” She replied as they left her room, shutting her door on their way out.
After getting dressed, and Pamela doing her hair and makeup, she went and got jane dressed. During the process Jane and Pamela talked about Mary Poppins, and the things she’d accept and detest too, and what exactly Mary Poppins means to the both of them.
“Well, to me, Mary Poppins means the world. She has class, grace, poise, and shows what’s it’s like to be a nanny, magic and none. She’s truthful, dignified, and like you said, she doesn’t sugar coat the darkness that all children will enter into. She’s truthful, and prepares the kids for those situations in life that they’ll come to know. She shows them how to save each other, and their families. She’s a perfect role model, just like you!” Jane finished, and looked up at Pamela who smiled back at her, warmth feeling in her heart.
“You’re spot on.” Pamela finished doing Jane’s hair, and brought her downstairs, meeting Ralph in the living room who was already waiting for them both.
“Lets do this!!” Jane said, way too over excitedly, and they all began opening their gifts.
About an hour later, almost all the gifts were opened except two. One was a small box, and the other, which Jane was just about to find out, was her Parrot Headed Umbrella which indeed looked just like Mary Poppins’ one from the books.
“OH MY GOSH.” Jane turned to Pamela in shock. “How did you get to do this??! i LOVE IT. all my friends are going to be SO JEALOUS. I’m so excited to use him! Polly, his name will be, of course! Sticking to the books.” she nodded and looked up at Pamela who was simply smiling at her.
“It wasn’t that difficult my dear. It was just as simple as a couple visits to a wood carver who helped make it. It had to be practically perfect for you, and i remember you telling me you’ve always wanted one, so now you got it.” She stood up, and walked to jane, who gave her the biggest of hugs.
“Thank you, i absolutely love it!” Jane smiled, and admired the umbrella once more before putting it down and turning to her father. She knew exactly what was coming. “Daddy…what’s in that small box? Whose it for?”
“Well..” Ralph began as he stood and went to grab the box before turing to Pamela and Jane who just stared back at him, Jane with a smile, and Pamela with a confused look, not realizing what exactly was about to happen. “This gift is for Pamela…” He looked and put his full attention over to the woman standing a few feet from him, with a normal expression on her face. “Pamela… god help me please. When i first met you…I’ll admit it, I thought you were going to be someone who was difficult to deal with. I thought you’d never cheer up before you reached the studios. You see, as a driver, it’s my job to make the person i’m driving as comfortable as possible, so their stay here in L.A for their meetings with Walt are smooth, easy, and quick. However, after the first day with you, I realized, I had to take a different approach to you. That’s why I didn’t speak with you for a couple days. I was watching you. I learned. You like all things quiet, calm, and tranquil. You like feeling strong, independent. You like feeling like you have the power. You do. You have all those features and more.” Ralph paused to take a deep breath, and it was in this moment that Pamela realized what was happening, and her eyes widened, and she put her now shaky hands by her sides, just watching him. She never thought this would be happening to her. She never dreamed about it happening in real life. Dreams, of course, but not literally. She took a shaky breath. She didn’t know how to handle this. She wanted to badly to yell stop, i can’t, or something snippy that she’d probably say, but her body and her mouth didn’t move a muscle. It wouldn't let her. Deep down she knew this was what she always wanted, so she just listened. “I also learned from watching you, Pamela, that you have a shield. A shield so strong, that it brings out the Mrs. Travers in you, and completely burns and throws the ashes of the Pamela…and the Helen Goff away. I know we all have pasts..some good, and some bad, and when things happen, things that one doesn’t want to remember, we have an automatic shield that goes up, and never really goes down..” Ralph slowly made his way over to Pamela, and took his hands in hers. Bringing her eyes to glance into his, she noticed how soft his eyes were. Pamela blinked back tears, and stood strong, but couldn’t help feeling lovely. “Luckily….I was fortunate enough to see that shield go on a journey with you. I got to see a strong, Mrs. Travers, go to Pamela Lyndon Travers and Helen Goff and be just as strong, if stronger.” He took another breath, and never took his eyes off Pamela. By now, she knew what was happening, and as he got down on one knee, she took a sharp breath, and tears formed in her eyes. “Over time, I still see you change..for the better, and I never want to stop seeing that. I never want to stop hearing your laugh, seeing you smile, hearing your voice, reading your rough drafts of books, and chapters. I never want to stop seeing you and Jane together bonding, being a mother to her. I never want to stop seeing our happiness grow even more and more. I never want to lose you, or the love we share. God knows I’m so lucky to even have you return it back. I’m forever grateful for that-for everything. What I’m saying is…I love you, Pamela..and want nothing more than to be able to spend forever with you, and have you be here as Jane’s mother..and my wife. So” He grabbed the box, in which he placed on the table before him, and slowly opened it while looking into Pamela’s eyes. Pamela was blinking back tears, and smiled down at him. My god, she was in pure shock, but a good shock. She took her hand in his when he reached for it after opening the box, and looked at the ring for a brief moment before looking back down at Ralph. “Pamela Lyndon Travers, will you do me the extreme honor and marrying me?..” He finished, and looked up at her.
Pamela didn’t know what to say. It was processing. This was a fairytale dream for her, that was coming true. After standing there in silence for what seemed like forever, she nodded several times, and whispered a soft “yes” that was barely audible. As tears now came streaming down her cheeks, she saw Ralph stand, and take the ring from the box and place it gently on her left hand, fourth finger. Finishing, she took a glance at it, and before even speaking, she pulled Ralph in for a gentle kiss.
Breaking the kiss and going over to Jane who was in tears for so many reasons, Pamela bent down, and hugged her tight. No words were spoken. None needed to be. The actions and feelings explained it all. Feeling Ralph join them, they all shared a huge loving, warm group hug, and it was in this moment, that Pamela, with her now eyes closed, still hugging the two of them, realized something. She always talked about saving. Being Saving. Seeing others being saved, and finding what they needed to find in life. Not once she did mention anything about herself being saved or finding what she needed and wanted-and now she didn’t have too. Ralph and Jane are what saved her. She got her saving, and now she truly was going to forever be, Ralph’s Mrs.
I hope you guys like it! I made this one for my dear friend, @savingpltravers <3
She says "You're the only American I've ever liked" and he says "Oh, really, how fascinating, why? Will you tell me more about that?"
and she says
"No."
"I don't want to tell you anymore about that."
"Now you're just asking too much."
"Go away."
Emma Thompson on Pamela not being morally consistent
