Casey shut the TV off, checked the time on his phone for the millionth time, and stood up to pace again, having nothing better to do with his nervous energy. After way too long, he finally heard the polite three taps at his window he never got from Raph.
“Yeah,” he called, his voice cracking, “S’open.”
Leo opened the window, smoothly climbed through with the practiced grace of a cat, and closed it gently behind him, lowering the blinds. He turned to face Casey expectantly.
“Hi,” Casey said, awkwardly.
“Hello,” Leo said, looking around the place. He spread his hands in confusion, “Everything okay? You texted?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah. No, everything’s fine. You want a - soda?”
He had almost offered him a beer, but then again, that would probably not be appreciated by the older brother, and would likely earn him a lecture and that’s the last thing he needed. Or maybe it actually was.
Leo eyed him with confusion. “Um. Okay.”
“I just wanted to talk. Y’know, hang out,” Casey said, sensing Leo’s discomfort, “Can’t we just...hang out?”
Leo blinked in surprise, and then smiled at Casey.
“Yeah. Yeah, why not? Actually, that’d be nice.”
“And...okay, I kinda...here, catch,” he tossed a soda from the fridge Leo’s way. He plucked it easily from the air, “I kinda wanted to ask you somethin.’”
“Okay,” Leo said, some of his suspicion returning as he walked over and joined Casey at his kitchen table, “Is it about Raph? Is he in some kind of trouble?”
“What? No, no, no! No, I mean - yes, it is about Raph, but no, he’s not in any kinda trouble.”
“Okay,” Leo said, eyeing Casey with suspicion, “Casey, I think maybe you better just ask me straight out.”
“Right. Uh,” Casey stammered, as they sat. He fiddled with the hem of his T-shirt, heedless of the sweat ring his can of soda was leaving on the table, “So, Raph...he...d’you know if he...likes girls?”
Leo’s eyes widened in surprise and he snorted a little.
“Well...yeah, I guess.”
“Oh,” Casey said, his shoulders slumping a bit, “Okay.”
“I mean, he has that poster in his room with that motorcycle girl,” Leo said, wrinkling his nose slightly as if motorcycle girls were beneath him, “But I guess that doesn’t really mean anything. I dunno, Casey, don’t you ever talk about girls together?”
“No,” Casey replied, a nervous sweat prickling his armpits, “No, we don’t.”
“Huh,” Leo said, surprised by his answer, “Well, I guess you could always just ask him, couldn’t you? Why the sudden curiosity?”
Leo’s expression deepened into a scowl.
“You don’t think Raph is seeing someone, do you? Another human we haven’t met before?”
“No! No, no, I’m sure he’d tell you if somethin’ like that happened,” Casey assured him. Actually, he was pretty sure that Raph would specifically not tell Leo if something like that happened, but...
“Well, I...” Leo got a strange look on his face as he took in Casey’s discomfort and began putting the pieces together.
“How about you, Casey?” Leo asked, casually, “Do you like girls?”
“I uh...I thought I did?” Casey said, the slight admission feeling at once terrifying but also like relief, some of the pressure fading now that he was actually discussing this with someone, “But lately, I...I dunno, since April and Donnie started takin’ up together, I been thinkin’...”
“Uh-huh,” Leo coaxed, patiently.
“About...maybe...” his face flamed scarlet, “Me n’ Raph, maybe...”
“You and Raph...what?” Leo asked, “Finding girls of your own? Or - ”
He suddenly interrupted himself and Casey watched anxiously as the penny dropped.
“Oh. Ooohhh!” Leo said, his eyes wide, “You...and Raph?!”
“Forget it,” Casey said, hastily, “It was stupid. I don’t know what I was - ”
“Well, now...hold on,” Leo said, holding a hand up, “I didn’t say that. I mean...have you spoken to Raph about...how you feel?”
“No,” Casey said, leaning forward, relieved that the secret was finally out, and desperate to talk to someone about it, “And it’s killin’ me, man!”
He sighed, and buried his face in his hands.
“It’s pointless. He’d prob’ly haul off and punch me in the face.”
Leo got a somewhat sad look on his face.
“Don’t underestimate him,” he said, firmly.
“Huh?” Casey replied, peeking at Leo through his fingers.
“Don’t underestimate him. Raph has a hard time dealing with...big feelings,” he said, holding his hand up over his chest, emphasizing his point, “But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have them. Yeah, Raph has a temper, but there’s a lot more to him that that. When it comes to the people he loves, he’s actually a very loyal, caring person. He might surprise you.”
“Huh,” Casey said, leaning forward, slightly encouraged, “So...you think I got a shot? You think he’d go for it?”
“Well,” Leo hedged, wrinkling his nose, “I...I’m sorry, Casey, but I’m about...ninety percent sure Raph is straight.”
“Huh,” Casey slumped again, “Yeah. I figured.”
“But I still think you should tell him,” Leo said, insistently, “He’s your best friend, and he’d want to be there for you.”
“Hm. Maybe,” Casey said, nodding thoughtfully, “I don’t wanna stress him out or mess things up with our friendship, though.”
“Well, yeah,” Leo said, nodding thoughtfully, “But...you could always try just coming out to him first? See how he takes it, give him a chance to get used to the idea, and then maybe later on, tell him how you feel?”
“Huh,” Casey said, suddenly feeling a bit lighter, “Yeah. That could...that could work, maybe.”
He gave Leo an appraising look.
“You know - you’re surprisingly easy to talk to.”
Leo smiled, and took a swig of his soda. “Thanks. I gotta say...this is kinda nice. The guys...well, ever since Splinter made me leader, it’s been...different.”
He looked up hastily. “We’re still close, of course, but...they don’t really come to me with their problems anymore, or...just to chat. I guess I didn’t realize how much I missed that.”
He sighed, and fiddled with his soda can. Casey was surprised to see this more vulnerable side of Leo.
“That sucks,” Casey said, sympathetically, “You should tell them that.”
Leo shrugged with a shy little half-smile, “Comes with the territory. ‘Heavy the head,’ and all that.”
“Mm.”
They both took a sip of their sodas in companionable silence.
“Well. Thanks for listening,” Casey said, “And thanks for not, y’know - flipping out.”
Leo laughed. “It’d be pretty hypocritical if I did.”
“Hippo...hippa?...”
“Oh, it...uh, it means I’d be showing, um...a lack of self-awareness,” Leo explained, “I actually like both, myself.”
“Both?” Casey asked, wrinkling his nose.
“Yeah. Meaning...guys and girls,” Leo added, his face coloring slightly, taking a sip of his soda.
Casey’s eyes flew open. “No shit?!”
Leo snorted, and some of the soda went up his nose, and he laughed, wincing painfully and pawing at his face.
“Sorry,” Casey laughed, passing him the nearby roll of paper towels.
“No, s’okay, just - your face!” Leo laughed, taking one and mopping himself up, “But...yeah, so that makes me ‘bi,’ I guess.”
“Holy shit,” Casey said, “You never said anything!”
Leo shrugged, “Never came up.”
“Does Raph and everybody know?”
“Yeah,” Leo nodded, “My family’s pretty much always known, I guess. I mean, we grew up in isolation, so I never really knew it was unusual.”
He laughed.
“When I was a kid, I used to swear I’d grow up and marry Captain Ryan. Man, Raph never let me hear the end of that. But then we got a copy of Mulan and I wanted to grow up and marry her.”
He and Casey laughed.
“But,” Casey said, his face falling slightly, “What about...y’know. You and Karai?”
Leo’s face darkened, and Casey felt, guiltily, that maybe he shouldn’t have brought up an obviously sore subject.
“There is no ‘me and Karai,’” Leo sighed, “And...at this point? It’s looking like there never will be.”
“Aw, c’mon,” Casey said, trying to sound encouraging, “Don’t think like that.”
Leo shrugged, a forlorn expression on his face.
“I don’t even know if we’ll ever see her again. Honestly, at this point? I just hope that she’s safe, wherever she is. That poor woman’s been through enough.”
“Mm,” Case nodded. He couldn’t argue, there.
"Anyway,” Leo said, shaking his head as if to chase the dark clouds away, “The odds of finding anyone who would be interested in a mutant turtle are so slim anyway, cutting those numbers in half over something like gender just seems arbitrary to me. But of course, I guess it’s not arbitrary for everybody,” he added, thoughtfully.
“Wow,” Casey sighed, leaning back, “I guess I really picked the right turtle to talk to about this.”
Leo laughed, “Yeah, guess so. So...what are you going to do? Are you going to talk to Raph?”
Casey took a deep breath in and sighed it out.
“Y’know...nah, I think...I think prob’ly no,” Casey sighed, “Talkin’ to you, it seems like he wouldn’t go for it, and...hearin’ what you said about having someone to talk to, and go to with yer problems n’ stuff...I mean, we’re really good friends, and that’s important, too...maybe even more important. I don’t wanna screw that up just ‘cuz I got an itch in my pocket, y’know?”
Leo huffed a small laugh through his nose at Casey’s choice of words, but then gave him a sympathetic grimace.
“I hope I didn’t talk you out of it,” Leo said, “I still think you should at least talk it over with him, even vaguely. Like you said, he’s your best friend, and I’m sure he’d want to know.”
“Yeah,” Casey said, nodding thoughtfully, “Yeah, maybe.”
He heaved a sigh of relief. Nothing had really gotten resolved, but still, he felt so much better having gotten it off his chest. And Leo was a surprisingly good listener. He’d expected a lecture, or the third degree, but Leo was actually kinda cool.
“Y’know, you’re actually kinda cool?” he blurted, without editing the thought.
Leo smirked and rolled his eyes, and Casey realized how what he just said sounded.
“I mean, uh...”
“It’s okay, I know what you meant. Thanks.” He stood from the table, and handed Casey his empty can. “And thanks for the soda. Sorry, I don’t know where your recycling is.”
“Yeah, no prob,” Casey said, tossing his and Leo’s cans into the bin under the sink.
“I’m gonna head home,” Leo said, heading for the window, “But I’m glad you texted me.”
“Yeah,” Casey said, turning and leaning on the sink, giving Leo a warm smile, “Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”
Leo smiled, and turned to head out the window. Casey was surprised, however, when he stopped and turned to face him with a curious expression on his face.
“D’you really?...”
He shook his head with a chuckle, and turned towards the window again.
“Y’know what, never mind. G’night.”
“No, go ahead,” Casey prompted, “What is it?”
“Do you...you really find Raph attractive?” Leo asked, with a bemused grin.
“Shut up,” Casey waved him away, suspecting that Leo was teasing him.
“No, I’m serious,” Leo insisted, “Even though...even though he’s a mutant turtle?”
Casey suddenly realized why Leo was asking, and considered the question seriously.
“Well...yeah,” he said, “Actually - I think all you guys are pretty hot.”
Leo blinked in surprise. “Really?”
“Well, yeah,” Casey said, gesturing at Leo with a vague toss of his hand, “I mean - you guys got that whole...muscles thing...goin’ on. And...y’know, you’re...”
He trailed off looking at Leo, trying to think just what it was that made him attractive. He knew what it was that drew him to Raph - his passion, his smirk, his strength, his brutal honesty...but Leo was so different. There was a sincerity to Leo, and compassion...and a kind of elegant poise, a quiet confidence that radiated from him and made you feel secure in his presence.
Casey started guiltily and met Leo’s amused smirk, as he realized he’d been staring.
“Sorry,” he stammered, and laughed, feeling his face heat up, “I was just...thinkin’.”
Leo didn’t reply, but his smile widened a bit.
“Anyway,” Casey said, and coughed, “Yeah, I mean - all you guys are pretty good-lookin’. Ta me, at least.”
“Even Don?” Leo teased.
“Well,” Casey said, recognizing the set-up, “There are limits.”
They laughed together.
“Well, see you around.”
“Yeah, see ya. Thanks, Leo.”
“Don’t mention it.”
Leo climbed smoothly out the window and turned to lower it behind him, and Casey sighed, and walked over to the couch to retrieve his cell phone.
“Likewise, by the way.”
Casey turned around, surprised that Leo hadn’t left yet. “Huh?”
Leo’s eyes darted down and then back up to Casey’s again, ocean blue, sparkling with mirth.
“You’re pretty good-looking, too.”
“Oh,” Casey said, his brows raising, and a flush of heat creeping up his neck. “Uh. Thanks.”
Leo grinned shyly, and leapt down from the fire escape.
Casey squinted at the empty space where he had just been.
Was Leo just?...
Nah.
