A northern working class lass just beat far right American money and the Epstein class to win a historic by-election in Manchester, and I just felt organic, non-self-manufactured hope for the first time in a while. This is proof that there is still everything to fight for.
Scroll on if you're just here for the porn and you don't wanna read me whine.
Attended an emergency antifascist demonstration in town. Hugely outnumbered because lots of people had gone to Brighton to do the same. It was stressful, I had to put myself between agitators with cameras and disabled people/women/my former students. Managed to get through without anyone getting hurt, but it's likely my face will now be on the tiktoks of local fascists and I've taught in the town for nearly a decade. It won't take much.
We then stopped off at the local little Pride thing going on nearby. One of the women in hi-viz stood giving me the middle finger and glaring at me. I didn't realise she was doing it at me at first, so I was like "can I help you, love?" And she told me that "we weren't welcome if we were here to start trouble" with the most disgusted sneer I've ever seen.
Apparently we didn't "look gay enough". She thought my partner and I were part of the far right come to leer. Because of the "way we looked".
The LGBT community can seriously fucking do one sometimes. And you know what? I told her to go fuck herself. Not my finest moment. But I'd come to breathe for a moment somewhere I thought was safe, and because I didn't "perform queer" correctly, I was fucking harassed by a woman wrapped in lesbian colours.
Honestly, I feel exhausted and angry and like I don't fucking matter and don't fucking belong anywhere.
Sometimes I like to stare at my partner for a bit, and when he raises an eyebrow, tell him our age gap is problematic and he should be ashamed for taking advantage of my innocence, knowing full well I hunted him for sport at the time. After 17 years, it's the small things.
Bro moaning about the girls "wearing nothing" in the gym, so I told him to put some clothes on; his stringer was showing his tits and nipples, and I couldn't concentrate, it was distracting. For a hot second, he got to experience what it felt like to be the woman he was sneering at and the look on his face 🤌
I just resisted the manipulative narcissism of my mother to keep my Christmas eve and day to my partner and Bertie. She pulled out all the stops, including claiming she was "traumatised" by my absence. But I prevailed. This is a major milestone for me because in previous years my sense of duty would have seen me getting in the car Christmas morning, and then suffering to the point of a breakdown when I got home. I'm pretty proud of me right now.
Call me old-fashioned, but I judge the fuck out of men who leave women to struggle with prams. Don't worry, fella, I'll carry your son up the stairs in his pram so your missus doesn't fall and get hurt. Least he'll see how men are meant to behave. What is even the point in you?
Firefighters and Disability Rights UK coming in swinging for trans people. Not a combination I could have predicted in a billion years, but grateful all the same.
