#relationshapes

[la-animaux]

Things are.... off with me and Mr right now. There's been a few inciting incidents recently that have put things off-kilter.

I understand what's happening, but I am not settled in how I feel about it.

[whatyouwanted-whatyougot]

I feel like crying my face off, but I can’t.

[la-animaux]

Mr is in a stank mood because our day got off to a rough start (valid) and he doesn't want to talk about it. Which is fine! The same thing happens to me.

I'm just reminding myself that this is a Him Problem and I don't have to fix it and he's a grown adult who can deal with his feelings privately if he wants to.

[la-animaux]

I was open/honest with Mr. Animaux about something that deeply embarrasses me, and it was such a relief. He didn't judge me at all!

My mood improved like three-fold from not worrying about his reaction anymore.

[la-animaux]

Some late night blogging.

Mr. Animaux is very anxious about my upcoming work trip. He'll be solo parenting for four days. It's the first time I've been away overnight since Baby Boy was born.

I am empathetic to his anxiety, but he's being kind of a jerk. He'll make snippy comments, and when I don't engage, he'll get annoyed.

He gets frustrated that Baby Boy doesn't talk yet and that he has tantrums. And I agree,, it is very frustrating!! But cranking at me about it is not helping.

I'm not worried at all; I have the utmost confidence in him as a parent. But staying calm when he's spiraling--and taking it out on me--is wearing me down.

[la-animaux]

A month ago, I got us tickets to the Oakland Zoo. A few of the moms from the local activity group were getting together, and I wanted to go.

At the time, I texted Mr. Animaux if he wanted to join and he said Yes.

I've mentioned a couple times this week that we had tickets to the Zoo on Saturday. But today, Mr. Animaux said that he didn't really want to go; no big deal, I asked my mom and she wants to come.

The ticket will not be wasted, and we three will have a great time.

But I'm kind of annoyed anyway because I want Mr. Animaux to come do stuff with Baby Boy and me. But on the other hand, I know that this sort of outing is really not his thing. He would always rather stay home.

Stop trying to put a square peg in a round hole, I tell myself! Mr. Animaux can stay home and do whatever he's going to do, and I can go out and have fun at the Zoo with my mom and my kid.

[la-animaux]

I was vulnerable with Mr. Animaux last night (not something I normally do because I prefer to process big emotions privately) and he was supportive and kind! It felt good to be heard.

[la-animaux]

FIL is coming over for lunch tomorrow, and Mr. Animaux and I were discussing the likelihood of him bringing his annoying girlfriend.

Apparently, last weekend they came over while I was doing wine stuff, and she made some sort of rude comments about Baby Boy. She also asked questions about things that were truly none of her business.

So I decided that if she does that shit again tomorrow, my response is going to be, "Why do you ask?" or "Are you concerned about something that I should know about?"

Her behavior will not be tolerated!