May 5, 2013
"This sweater's kind of itchy... What's it made out of?"
"EYELASHES."
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Jamaica
seen from United States
seen from Tunisia
seen from United States
seen from Sweden
seen from South Korea
seen from Indonesia
seen from China
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Sweden
seen from United Kingdom
"This sweater's kind of itchy... What's it made out of?"
"EYELASHES."
i feel dirty
am i allowed to be jealous????
wow how convenient
apparently i was always like this ok thanks sweetheart i needed that that reminder i dont need to impress you or anyone else
oh that was really, um. empowering i guess
which feels like its dumb but i guess it probably isnt considering how arrogant i am its weird i get so abashed when people appreciate me being legit with them, or complimenting them (deserved or otherwise), or whatever else is going down. it just. blew my mind. it seemed such a simple, obvious thing to me. weird.
you know just laying here in the dark, not doing anything else though. its a lot better. a lot easier. having a warm body to hold me, and knowing its eridan, someone i can trust, someone who looks out for me, who helps even if their approach isnt EXACTLY what im looking for, and who strives to be patient with even my most childish or longstanding issues. its nice. someone who appreciates all the ways i struggle to make sure the people i care about know that i live them. that theyre important to me, theyre my world, my life. he. otices and he appreciates and shit if that isnt one of the most validating things ever. no matter what happens, if ive got him ill be ok. and ill remember how to talk to john eventually. i did a little better at the end there, but ive got to take care of him. someone has to help him get better, and to help him realize its not his fault, and it doesnt make him any less beautiful, perfect, dokitastic if hes fucked up. most of us are at least a little, everyone is in their own way, but ive got faith in him and even if he slips sometimes, one day hell have proved to the world how amazing he is. hell pull through this, and ill help him. if i can just stop getting distracted by how gorgeous of a person he is. even the other john is almost as bad. im just scared im a catalyst for his dead dave that was crushing on him, or that ill use him since im obvs crushing andor in love with dorkways or something. but no ones every been so consistently thoughtful, i mean other than ampora, peopl dont usually notice me when im gone so i just. he makes my heart skip sometimes and it scares me. nitram likes someone else???? but i guess it doesnt mater i can dodge the drama of that since i noticed and i know now. besides hes nitram. thatd be weird. i just feel better with someone else, especially ampora, here. resting in the dark after ever crying, even a little. itll be ok. i think it really will.
what if
almost everything i try to communicate with the world at large gets lost in the static
i fucking love oranges #relevantblogging