#request: unknown

[hotelhoot-complaints]

why is everyone so queer...

OJ: This box was a fucking mistake

[hotelhoot-complaints]

is there a map of the hotel im so scared of numbers

OJ: I have bad news for you about what aliens are apparently shaped like.

OJ: In any case, we do have a map, but it was drawn by Paper and it's kind of hard to read. Good luck.

[hotelhoot-complaints]

I saw a black and white sphere doing something in the lobby so I went to go say hi and they bit me??? Thankfully they didn't break the skin but it still hurt. they then apologized after biting me? It was like they were possessed for a second and bit me or something. And then when i walked away I heard them telling "yaing" (whoever that is) to not bite people??

-a very confused hotel oj visitor

OJ: I'd suggest you go get a rabies vaccine.

[hotelhoot-complaints]

whens the last you checked the HVAC systems?

[hotelhoot-complaints]

do you do divorces here. can i get divorced here? im not married but i wanted to get divorced

OJ: We are not a court, so no, but there is a nearby court hre that would likely let you get divorced.

OJ: I think you need to get married first though. But they offer hypothetical divorces for two people with homoerotic subtext going through a rough patch in their relationship.

[hotelhoot-complaints]

i just saw something fall out of the airvent and start fucking crawling across the hallway wtf this hotel sucks i fucking hate this place -nickle

OJ: Oh gods why is Nickle here?? Everyone fucking SCATTER.

[hotelhoot-complaints]

everyone's acting like the fog is weird calling it "The Fog" or some shit but like fog is normal fog is very normal #fogapologist

OJ: See? Very normal fog. This fog analyzer has said so.

[hotelhoot-complaints]

Is this hotel osha compliant

OJ: I'm not answering without the presence of a lawyer.