can you please explain more why penelope wouldn't like a aggressive tough man?
well, for starters, she’s just never been shown to be attracted to that type of man at all? i know she didn’t choose to marry him, but clifford was neither tough nor aggressive and they got along extremely well. you could tell he was her rock and the person she always turned to when she needed a shoulder to cry on (figuratively and literally— she did the latter in 1x11), and i feel like that’s something penelope not only needs, but would actively seek out— someone reliable, who she could depend on. someone who would provide her with comfort when she needed it. those aren’t qualities i would associate with a tough, powerful man.
then there’s hal. with hal, we do get an indication of what penelope looks for in a man. like clifford, hal is a quiet, passive type. sure, he can give as good as he gets when he’s angry, but his general personality is very calm and agreeable. level-headed. and that’s something pen lacks. i think penelope needs someone to balance her out— someone to ground her when she’s letting her emotions get the better of her and remind her everything is going to be okay. penelope has had a very tumultuous life, and so i see her gravitating towards men who she feels could provide her with a sense of stability. remember when she told cheryl that hal was “her one decent chance at a better life”? penelope is always thinking of the future.
i remember an interview in s2 where nat talked about how penelope’s feelings for hal were genuine, and that penelope was just “looking for a bit of warmth from somewhere”. given what an isolated, cold, and abusive upbringing she had, this makes sense. of course she wants someone to be warm with her and show her affection— she’s been deprived of those things her whole life. and she really is very affectionate with her partners. if you pay close attention to season 1, she and clifford were always initiating affectionate gestures with each other. and even in the one scene we get of her and hal having an affair, what is she doing? giving him a massage by the fire. penelope is touch starved! she wants a real connection and she wants it bad.
so again— why would a tough man appeal to her? what would be the draw?
and finally, it’s been well-established that penelope has endured a significant amount of trauma at the hands of the men around her— to the point where she is extremely mistrustful of men in general. she does not think they have good intentions. see: “men. they are the true poison”, “men and their delusions. why do they do anything? self-aggrandizement”. the monsignor at the soqm sold her to the blossoms (she was very quick to make this distinction when betty assumed it was the sisters), her father groomed her as a child bride for her brother, clifford (whom she trusted more than anyone in the world) ended up betraying her by killing jason, there was no love lost between her and claudius for whatever reason and she clearly disapproved of his actions on a deep moral level, darryl tried to get her to commit suicide with him and later tried to come onto her while they were both married with children (i’ll refrain from making assumptions, but she did call him a “judas”, so make of that what you will), and there was the whole business with the sugarman. not to mention, more recently, she was nearly potentially assaulted by a group of backwater criminals.
taking all of this into consideration, why would a big, tough man be something penelope was looking for? what would that type of man do for her? how would they satisfy her? none of her needs require that a man have those qualities. penelope wants to feel safe and loved. she wants someone to look after her. she wants a comfortable, stable life with someone she can trust and depend on. someone who will be there for her when she needs them and with whom she can share a real connection. i cannot, under any circumstances, envision her finding herself drawn to bold, assertive types. it’s important to note that while penelope may be dominant at work, or in sexual situations, she has very much always been portrayed as being submissive— especially in her romantic relationships. there is no way she would seek out tough/powerful/dominant men, and in fact she has been shown to dislike those exact types on more than one occasion (just look at how much she dislikes and distrusts hiram).
tl; dr: penelope canonically gravitates towards quiet, passive men she perceives as dependable and stable and her laundry list of traumas at men’s hands makes it very unlikely that she would ever go for tough/aggressive types, given how mistrustful she is of men and how submissive she tends to be in her relationships
