#rose taurus

[uncaught-coolfish]

baby mine

[didyoutrydynamite]

Email: Sent from Adam Taurus forwarded to Full Contact List: 

Attached Photo: 3 month old Rose Taurus’s head, now showing little cow horn nubs growing.

Attached Message: COW HORNS BITCHES!!!! That’s right! Told you fuckers I wasn’t a goat! 😈 

P.S. Rouge and I need RSVP’s for those invitations for the BBQ next Saturday to get an accurate headcount for food. Thanks.

P.S.S. Eat shit.

[nonbinary-morro]

@uncaught-coolfish srry it took forever BUT I FINALLY FINISHED IT :D

(click for better quality)

[didyoutrydynamite]

Jaune Mulaney

Adam: *Bouncing Two-Yearold Rose on his knee* Hey Rose, you know who that is? That is your Uncle Jaune.

Jaune: *Kneels down* Oh my gods, she is so precious!

Rose: *Points at Jaune* Uncle Jaune has a penis!

Whole room: *Goes dead silent*

Jaune: *Pales* I- uh-I-um-!

Adam: *Reddens with embarrassment* ROUGE!

Rouge: It's alright everyone! Rose is just going through that phase where she say's "penis" and "vagina" a lot!

Adam: That isn't even a thing!!

[didyoutrydynamite]

Teacher: Mr. And Mrs. Taurus, your daughter instigated a fight at school today. She convinced two boys that she would give a kiss to whoever was strongest.

Rouge: *Happy gasp* My baby's first love triangle? 💖

Teacher: Ma'am, you don't seem to understand, this is an elementary school. We can't condone this kind of behavior.

Adam: If you ask me, I think its great Rose has placed value in strength and combat prowess in a potential partner.

[didyoutrydynamite]

I think Adam and rouge are gonna have to have a lonnnnnnggggggg talk about what they say around their daughter

Rouge: *Whines* But you love it when I talk dirty!

Adam: To me. In private. And not to our child. You can't just say the first thing that comes to your mind. Remember how Rose's first words was "Fuck"?

Rouge: Ok now THAT wasn't my fault! She said that after you burnt yourself on the stove and cursed!

Adam: ... Shit, you're right.

Rose: *Pulls out binky* Shit!

Adam: OH COME ON!

[didyoutrydynamite]

How much of a spine shattering hug did Adam get when rouge found out she was pregnant with rose?

Rouge: Adam! Adam! Adam! *Wraps her arms around his shoulders and kisses him and squeals happily*

Adam: *A little overwhelmed* Hey! Calm down! What is it?

Rouge: *Mischeviously giggles* Adam. Do you remember a few weeks ago when we were talking dirty and I told you to "Knock me up like I'm your personal breeding stock?"

Adam: *Nods* Yeah, honestly one of the more memorable ones... wait.

Rouge: *Takes out positive pregnancy test* MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

Adam: *Shocked and sits down* Whoa...

Rouge: *Worried* Whoa? Whoa as in "Whoa that's amazing," or "Whoa I fucked up?"

Adam: *Shakes his head quickly* NO! No, Rouge. This is amazing! It's just... this is big. Shit, we're not even married!

Rouge: So? My mom and dad weren't married when they made me, *GASP* Oh my god is this going to be a family tradition?!

Adam: *Contemplates then smacks his face with both hands, a look of determination formed.* Then as a man, I need to take responsibility. *Gets down on one knee* Rouge...

Rouge: *Happy gasp, tears already forming in her eyes.* Yes Adam? ❤

Adam: *Tears in his good eye* I swear to hunt down a good man who will be a much better husband to you and won't raise this kid to be a fuck up like I will.

Rouge: YOU'RE RAISING THIS BABY, DAMNIT!

[didyoutrydynamite]

For the love of god please tell us Rose doesn’t inherit her mothers taste in literature?

Despite Adam's best efforts, Ninjas of Love is Rose's favorite book series. A girl after her own mother really.