Dabbling in the spicyrum ship be because it's funny.
How on earthbread does Wheezy manage to get all these bitches??? Beats me, but really in my au Rumulus has a big fat crush on Wheezy and Wheezy is more than ready to take advantage of it to get free drinks and to get Rumulus to do things for them.
Wheezy only indulges Rums fantasies for their own personal gain, they don't love Rum, but Rum doesn't know that, he genuinely believes that Wheezy will leave Chips for him one day and that he will get to live in his own world with Wheezy but he doesn't know or at least won't acknowledge that Wheezy doesn't care about him. TLDR: Rumulus needs to get the hell away from Wheezy and find himself a person that treats him right.










