Lance, like all the other paladins, is finally getting used to the “mind meld” they all have to indulge in when controlling their lions. Until someone’s uncontrollable crush comes in and knocks them all back in surprise. It’s a crush that circles persistently through their thoughts and only gets stronger as time goes on, until they begin to realize this might be a bit more serious than the term “crush” implies.
Meanwhile, the unfortunate paladin behind it all is trying desperately to bury the feelings away, yet failing at every turn.
Klance.
Part 1
Part 2
Keith… Keith was panicking. Like, hardcore panicking. Like, freaking out.
Just… hopefully nobody could tell. He was pretty sure no one could. Maybe he couldn't control his feelings when they were in their lions, but he damn sure was going to when they weren't.
It was… It was embarrassing, what had happened. Beyond embarrassing, but he really didn't want to think about it long enough to measure the level of embarrassment. That would probably have him blushing at the dinner table and that wasn't acceptable. Blushing and burying his face in his pillow and whining was for private Keith time only. As far as everyone else needed to know, he was stoic and cool.
And definitely not in love with Lance.
Okay, he did lose his temper… sometimes. He knew that. But that didn't automatically mean he was guilty of the ridiculous crush he couldn't keep from his thoughts anymore. Not as far as his teammates knew. No, he probably wasn't handling this whole "being in love with Lance" thing in the healthiest way, but he'd never been in love before and, well, the whole predicament was honestly stressing him out to the point where—so long as he wasn't in his lion—he all out refused to seriously entertain it. Easier to ignore. After all, they had far more important things to be worried about than… feelings.
Ugh, why had this happened?! What was even so great about Lance anyway? He was loud and obnoxious and… and even as they were eating dinner, he was trying to hang a spoon off his nose. Him and Coran both, actually.
And yet, despite how ridiculous Keith wanted to find the whole thing, all he really registered was a sense of endearment. How could Lance be so… what he was! But also so… everything… all at the same time?
The spoon fell off Lance's nose and splattered in the food goo. Keith rolled his eyes.
Lance, like all the other paladins, is finally getting used to the “mind meld” they all have to indulge in when controlling their lions. Until someone’s uncontrollable crush comes in and knocks them all back in surprise. It’s a crush that circles persistently through their thoughts and only gets stronger as time goes on, until they begin to realize this might be a bit more serious than the term “crush” implies.
Meanwhile, the unfortunate paladin behind it all is trying desperately to bury the feelings away, yet failing at every turn.
Klance.
Part 2
Part 1
The mind meld, as Lance (because he was a genius) had deemed it, that the five paladins were quite forced into when they were in their lions was something they'd all been initially uncomfortable with. But as their battles with the Galra and practice days had worn on, they'd grown quite accustomed to the whole thing. The mental connection wasn't overly invasive, after all. More or less, it was about intention.
Not intention as in they could control what was projected and what wasn't, but more as though their thoughts and feelings had to be intentionally severe. For example, Pidge's irritation when they were cornered by the Galra was always very obvious, or Shiro's deep desire that they all stay calm and collected. Hunk was known for, well, panic, but that usually faded pretty quickly in favor a deep thrumming determination and focus (as well as hunger when they were practicing boring formations). Keith had less constant interjections and was more inclined to shoot them up with irritation or rage (depending on the situation) for short bursts of seconds. Lance was also pretty sure that, when things were dire, the fierce desire to protect came from Keith too. He'd thought it was Shiro at first, until their head's steady kind of acute protectiveness had come to the surface.
Though everyone was flattered at these rare displays by Keith, no one said anything. Probably wouldn't have gone over too well and, honestly, making Keith feel embarrassed by the bonds he'd formed with them probably wasn't a good idea when considering how he kept to himself most of the time.
Because, yes, even Lance knew when there was potential to go a step too far. He liked to bicker and poke and prod at Keith, and be a general annoyance to everyone, but he wasn't out to hurt feelings. Not intentionally anyway. He was a people person, after all, and spent a great deal of energy feeling others out and learning their boundaries. Sure, his fellow paladins probably didn't realize as much (he knew they thought he was slightly ridiculous and maybe even a little stupid—most people did), but it was true. He was generally thoughtful and only pushed as far as he was sure someone could take.
His supposed intellect (or assumed lack) and knack for being annoying aside, he brought his own degree of Lance to the mind meld mud pile of feelings. Optimism, that was what he generally projected in battle or practice. After all, they had to have faith they were going to succeed in order to do so. Maybe optimism wasn't as important as Hunk's determination, Shiro's steady hand, Pidge's irritated analyses, or Kieth's adrenaline inducing rage, but it must have been good for something. Otherwise there'd be problems. Allura was always going on about how they had to be balanced, how it was important that their own thoughts work well with everyone else's.
And since no one had been complaining, Lance could only come to so many conclusions. Either his optimism was useful or, well, simply wasn't a hindrance, worst case scenario. Not like they really talked about each other's mental brain waves, after all. They'd all pretty much deduced who was who—it was pretty obvious—but so long as things were going smoothly, there was no need to call any of it to attention.
That was what Lance told himself anyway. Even if his fluffy, hovering over their heads optimism was as much use as a lawnmower in space, at least he wasn't causing problems. That in and of itself was enough to keep him positive.
Maybe he was a fifth wheel, but at least he wasn't running flat.
They kept up this general understanding quite well, each of them acclimating to the feeling of their minds rubbing together until it became habitual.
Which made something new cropping up that much more obvious to everyone.
At first, it was this barely noticeable thrum, so Lance didn't think too much of it. They were just practicing some formations outside the castle, safely tucked out of Zarkon's reach, and sometimes one or two of them were slightly preoccupied. It happened—they were only human after all—and couldn't be totally in sync all the time.
Generally, however, when these foreign feelings cropped up, they made a few turns through the constant loop that was their minds before the person responsible got their act together.
At worst—should someone be really off their game—Shiro would say something.
Which was what he did then, when the subtle thrumming didn't go away. It was like a vague itch and was beginning to distract them all.
"Everyone, remember to focus," he said into the coms. "I know these formations seem easy these days, but that doesn't mean practice isn't important."
Lance nodded inside his helmet, steering Blue expertly around his fellow Paladins and wondering who it was that was thinking of other things. The familiar was obvious, but unless it was a sensation that could easily be related to one of them, it was sometimes hard to tell who was guilty and who wasn't.
Despite Shiro's warning, however, the feeling persisted.
In fact, it grew stronger, blossoming between them like an unwanted flower that gave away more than was likely intended.
Pidge giggled.
"Focus, Paladins."
"How are we supposed to focus, Shiro?" Lance asked. "I feel like I'm getting filled up with warm fuzzies or bubble water."
Keith growled.
"Just because someone's feeling extra affectionate, doesn't mean we need to let it distract us," Shiro maintained.
Because that was what the itch had turned into. Someone—though it be yet a mystery—was having some very, very, uh, "friendly" feelings toward someone else among their group. And while it was likely embarrassing for whoever couldn't control it, Lance thought it was kind of nice to feel something so bubbly and innocent for once.
"Okay, seriously, I can't focus with this going on," Pidge said, laughing again and nearly running her lion into Keith's when she was supposed to have been spiraling in the other direction. "This group crush," as it'd become, "is really distracting."
Shiro sighed, sounding somewhat sharper in tone. "We need to be able to work through this kind of thing."
"That sounds awfully defensive, Space Dad," Lance teased. "You know what they say, the more you deny it…"
Shiro was quite obviously not amused. But everyone knew that he had feelings for Allura and this "crush" was, well, it was directed at one of the paladins, that much was also clear. They all kept Shiro's feelings safely locked up nonetheless. They could sense it a bit every time Allura came over the com, but they knew better than to so much as comment.
The realization had also spurred Lance to flirt with her a little less. But only a little.
"Can we just focus on practice?" Keith asked, sounding exasperated. "This is a waste of time."
"Now that's just mean, hot stuff," Lance replied, using the nick name he knew irritated Keith the most. "Love is not a waste of time."
A flash of annoyance passed from Keith and bounced between them all.
"I bet it's Hunk," Lance decided, though he knew perfectly well that it wasn't. He'd know what a Hunk-crush felt like—they'd known each other far too long for him not to.
"Hm? What?" Hunk's voice came abruptly over the coms. "Sorry, I was thinking about lunch and- Ohhhhh, wait, what's that?" He giggled like a little school girl. "Somebody's got a crush!"
"How long have you been daydreaming?" Pidge asked.
"Since, like, two formations ago."
Shiro sighed. Again. "Look, it doesn't matter who has a crush on who, Keith is right. We have practice to get to and something like this shouldn't be enough to stop us in our tracks." Because they'd all come to a stop, their lions floating motionlessly in space. "Sometimes things like this will happen and we need to just work through it. Now enough chatter and form ranks for drill nineteen."
Though there was a bit more good-natured snickering, they did as they were told and didn't mention the crush for the rest of practice, despite it never seeming to go away.
"Maybe one of the lions has a crush," Pidge joked as they were heading into the common room that afternoon.
"Like, on another lion?" Hunk asked.
"Pfft, yeah right." Lance popped the collar of his hood. "If there's a crush to be had, ya'll know who it's directed at." He thought his implication was pretty clear, but Pidge and Hunk still dared to pretend to be clueless. So Lance cleared his throat. "Well, whoevers lion it is, they should know I'm taken. Me and Blue, we're steady as they come." He made a leveling motion with his hand.
"Good to know your romantic considerations include a giant lion spaceship," Pidge said with a smirk.
Lance glared. "Of course they do. Blue is a beautiful, stunning woman and deserves every attention I have to give."
"Okay, this is getting weird," Hunk decided. "We don't need to know what you and your lion get up to in your cockpit."
Lance was nearly ready to be offended, but then settled for a sly grin instead. "Cockpit," he said simply.
Both Hunk and Pidge left him in their dust, walking nearly fast enough to catch up with Keith and Shiro.
Unfortunately, the infamous crush didn't clear up as they'd all thought it would. The next time they were all suited up and in their lions, it was still there and thrumming as steadily as ever. In fact, it only grew stronger with each practice, though by small amounts. For a few days, Lance and Pidge did seriously consider that maybe it was a lion, but there was something inherently human about it, specifically how… shy the sensation was. Whoever was projecting it didn't want to be and was trying desperately to hold it back. Which just wasn't a lion characteristic. If the lions needed or wanted something, well, they made sure everybody knew about it.
It quickly became something they refused to talk about, no matter how heavily it weighed over them all. Sometimes, when they first got into their lions, they could feel the owner of the crush pushing back on it desperately, a slice of frantic panic that was much more personal than Hunk's overzealous freak outs during missions.
The one behind it, however, was never successful in keeping it at bay. And so it became a bit of a norm, until, finally, whoever it belonged to stopped trying to hide it. Instead, the crush was lined with a certain degree of resignation.
It wasn't until one morning—following a night of pummeling a Garlra fleet and making a run for it—that the issue cropped up again.
It was stupid, really. They'd just pulled off a ridiculously hard practice maneuver, one they'd been working on for weeks, and everyone was thrilled to have finally gotten it right.
"About time," Pidge said into the com. "I was pretty sure Lance was going to run headlong into Shiro for the millionth time."
"Hey! That's a hard move!" Lance snapped. "I don't see you trying to do it."
Pidge pouted.
"He's right," Shiro interjected. "If you can pull that twist regularly, we'll have yet another strategy. It is a hard move, Lance, and you should be proud."
"Yeah, Lance!" Hunk agreed.
Pidge sighed. "I guess you have turned out to be a pretty good pilot," she said, though she didn't sound all that thrilled about doing so.
Lance, on the other hand, silently preened at the attention. It wasn't every day that focus was put on him. Which was fine—he'd grown up in a giant family and knew attention was something to be earned. But that didn't mean he wasn't going to bask in it when he was able.
And then—right after Pidge's comment—was when it happened. The "crush" expanded and swelled abruptly, hazing through them all until it was surrounding Lance in a warm sort of buzz. A buzz that was both encouraging as well as filled with…
It was filled with love.
Needless to say, the sudden change took them all aback, multiple gasps of surprise echoing over the coms. Lance was among them, his hands tight around his control sticks as he blinked stupidly and gaped into the silence of his cockpit.
It wasn't something that was easy to recover from, after all. The feeling—which in itself seemed like an understated descriptor—was all-encompassing and completely engulfing. For a few seconds, Lance could have sworn he was wrapped up tight in his mother's arms, or standing beneath the Cuban sun, or even enjoying a worry-free afternoon with Blue (which had never happened). He felt safe and valued and… and raw.
The sensation was so poignant that he thought he might tear up if it smothered him much longer.
But it didn't stick around. Frantic panic abruptly rushed past them all and like a cat clawing down curtains, the haze was ripped away, the crush more subdued than it had been when it'd first shown up. Probably because there was a new blanket of mortification to drown it out.
To Lance, however, it felt like having a nice, warm, home-filled quilt ripped violently from his hands. So violently that he even whined into the com before he could stop himself.
For a few seconds, no one said a single thing, their lions once more floating motionlessly in space.
It was Allura that finally interrupted the silence. "Is everything alright? I'm not seeing any activity from anyone…?"
"Uh, yeah, everything's fine," Shiro said quickly, that he'd stumbled some over his words hammering through all the harder how… shocking the situation had been. But with the silence sliced, they were able to take stunted direction and finish up the practice, even if none were recovered enough to be on their top game.
Lance least of all. Sitting quietly in the kitchen while Hunk cooked (a rare occurrence in itself), he contemplated what had happened with furrowed brows and an out of character frown.
They all knew with certainty at that point who the crush was directed toward, if crush was even an appropriate word. To Lance, who'd been the target of the emotional swell, it'd been made perfectly clear that this was more than a crush. One of the four other paladins were…
They were in love with him. With Lance. While Lance liked to flaunt a cocky personality and flirt with anything he found relatively attractive, he'd never actually… dated anyone before. Which meant that he'd never found someone that had actually reciprocated any of his advances. Most of the time, his flirting was viewed as a silly bother and, while sometimes considering him charming, no one had ever taken him seriously.
Which made it a little hard for Lance to even believe that someone was… was in love with him. One of his teammates really thought that highly of him? But how? And why? Of them all, he had the least to offer, was… was the most replaceable. He'd didn't have Hunk or Pidge's smarts, or Shiro's Dad-Vibes, or Keith's mad skills at everything.
Yet, somehow, he'd managed to catch someone's attention.
But who?
Well, there were only four options. Unless… Unless it was a lion.
Okay, that was weird. No. No lions.
There was no way it was Shiro—he was way too obsessed with Allura.
And Keith was out too. Lance was pretty sure that the most Keith did was tolerate him, let alone like him.
Which left Hunk and Pidge…
Leaning forward on his stool, Lance narrowed his dark blue eyes at Hunk's back. He was leaning into the oven, pulling out a batch of cookies, and Lance said nothing as the large man turned to face him.
At which point, Hunk sighed. "It's not me," he said simply, setting the cookies down on the counter before putting his full focus on the conversation.
Lance tapped his chin thoughtfully. "There's no way for me to know that for sure…"
"Dude, I'm not in love with you. No offense, but you're not exactly my type. You know, being a dude and all."
Yet Lance remained stubbornly suspicious. "I'm watching you…"
"You know it's not me," Hunk continued, slipping the cookies off the sheet with some kind of overly-long spatula. Alien Spatula.
"Well if it's not you, that only leaves Pidge!" Lance hissed out, before reaching up and gripped the sides of his face in distress. "Oh god, Pidge is in love with me! Hunk! What do I do?!"
Hunk looked doubtful. "Why would you think it's Pidge?"
"That's the only other option there is! Shiro wants to get in Allura's alien space pants, Keith hates my guts. If not you, then it's Pidge. Or…" Lance gulped. "Or one of the lions really is in love with me! Oh god, Hunk! There's a giant cat-shaped spaceship in love with me! Blue is going to kill that other lion! We'll be ripped apart!" He put the back of his hand against his forehead dramatically and leaned back. "Voltron will never rise again!"
"It's not a lion, you know that."
"Then it's Pidge!"
"I'm what?"
Just then, the very girl hopped up onto the stood beside Lance, peering between the two curiously.
"Uh…" Hunk was obviously uncomfortable, as was Lance, which Pidge clearly noticed. She looked puzzled, before then becoming exasperatingly irritated.
"Don't flatter yourself," she said simply, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'm not in love with you. Like that's even possible."
"Hey!"
Pidge waved off Lance's shout of protest. "You seriously haven't figured out who it is?"
"Pidge, don't," Hunk warned.
"Wait, wait, wait," Lance waved his hands dramatically. "You know who it is?"
"Er, uh, well, n-not exactly…" Hunk shrugged and focused down on his cookies.
"Look, it's not Shiro, we all know that since we know what his crush feels like already. And it's not Hunk, at least not after today when we found out this thing was directed at you, of all people."
"Hey!"
"And it's not me because, one, no, and two, I'm not really into the whole love scene."
"Uh, well that means it has to be a lion then," Lance deduced, holding up a knowing finger.
Pidge looked at him like he was an idiot. "Or Keith."
Lance said nothing for a moment, before releasing a loud, short, bitter laugh. "Yeah, no. Keith hates my guts."
"I don't know that I'd say he hates you," Hunk corrected.
"Okay, well, he's definitely not in love with me."
"He's the only option. Process of elimination."
"Or," Lance said slyly, "one of you is lying."
Pidge rolled her eyes. "Well, I thought the crush at first belonged to you, so I guess I can't blame you for not believing it. The idea that Keith is in love at all, let alone with a buffoon like you, is pretty unbelievable."
"Gee, thanks." Lance was not amused.
"But," she bit into her cookie, "it's really your only option."
"Or it's a lion."
Both Pidge and Hunk spoke at the same time. "It's not a lion."
"Well! It's also not Keith!" Huffing, Lance stood, waving his arms in their direction helplessly before once again narrowing his eyes. "I'm watching you two," he said, pointing at them as he began to walk away. "Always watching," he whispered lastly, just as he was backing out of the room.
More frustrated that he would have preferred, Lance once more ran through all his options as he walked to his room. Despite her words, Pidge was still at the top of his list of most likely. She was probably just trying to throw him off her trail.
Still, even Pidge seemed inherently unlikely. It seemed unlikely that any of them could feel that way about him. Maybe… Maybe he was misinterpreting the whole thing? What if it hadn't actually been directed at him and it'd just been a mix-up in their muddle of mind waves? Or what if it wasn't love and they were just assuming it was?
He was the goof, the clown, the flirt. He couldn't imagine that any of his teammates would fall for him. He just… didn't seem their types.
But…
Reaching up, Lance laid his hand on his chest before gripping some at his t-shirt. For a moment, it'd been so welcoming and… and comforting, being loved. It'd felt… safe. And good. And pure. And it'd been painful when it'd been ripped away.
No, he couldn't think like that. No matter who it was that felt such things for him, he couldn't encourage it or go looking for it. Fact was, he didn't feel the same way about them and it wouldn't be fair to take advantage of their feelings. He did… he did like someone, but as he'd told Hunk and Pidge, they hated his guts (most likely).
There was no way the feelings belonged to Keith. The red paladin could hardly stand to be in the same room as Lance most of the time, let alone be any more than a friend. If that. They were rivals, mostly, and at each other's throats whenever they could be. Granted, Lance liked fighting with Keith. One, it was fun, and two, it was a good cover up for his own feelings. Despite what everyone probably thought (except for maybe Hunk), Lance was very good at controlling his emotions. Growing up in a big family teaches patience and restraint, and a certain degree of acceptance that things are not going to always go the way one wants. Becoming emotional wasn't acceptable when he had so many others to look out for. Not that emotions were frowned upon, but he was an older brother. He was used to putting others before himself, to hiding his own pain.
Which made it easier to accept that Keith didn't want anything to do with him. Voltron, his friends, they came first. He couldn't afford to be making a stink about his own personal issues.
Whoever it was that had feelings for him, however, seemed to be having far more trouble with the whole ordeal. Which Lance felt bad about. It was obvious they didn't want to broadcast their feelings, but just couldn't help it.
Well, it was probably better not to pursue the issue anyway. Yeah, that was best. There was no way Lance would ever tease anyone about those kinds of feelings and it was probably wise not to go snooping around about them either. Whoever it was (he was still thinking Pidge), they'd get over it soon enough. Just like he'd eventually get over Keith.
After all, he'd had plenty of crushes, even fallen a few times, and he was always able to move on.
