#safer spaces

[nuetheureux]

What Makes Naturist Spaces Feel Safer?

Safety in naturist spaces does not come from nudity itself. It comes from culture. When newcomers say a naturist setting felt safe, they are usually describing a combination of visible social signals: respectful tone, clear boundaries, and behavior that protects dignity. You can often feel those signals within the first few minutes. What makes the difference is not just the absence of bad…

What Makes Naturist Spaces Feel Safer?

[meeresbande]

movements aren’t safer spaces

something we realised yesterday as we were talking with our chosen family - if you want to change society, you can’t do it only in groups with narrowly defined boundaries. It’s best to work together with anyone who has the same or largely overlapping goals, even if they’re different from you in some ways. Build broad, diverse movements!

Then have smaller rooms within those movements that are safer spaces or empowering spaces for more specific groups. Spaces that can (and often should) have more narrowly defined boundaries and criteria for who gets to be part of it based on their identity or experiences. Spaces for meeting others like you, for self-help processes, for empowerment, for education, for safety, to just get a break from a mainstream culture that discriminates or ignores you. Define who should be allowed in and what kind of content and behaviour is welcome or not (safer space - for whom? safety from what? safety to do what?).

And for some people and some purposes, these safer spaces are all you need or want.

But for having movements that change society, more diversity, openness and the support of allies/accomplices/supporters is necessary. In this context trying to define who gets to be a part of it based on their identity (as opposed to their goals or tactics) is really detrimental! Of course, people who are directly affected by oppression versus supporters have different roles to play, but we all have roles to play if we fight for overlapping goals. 

Which of course isn’t to say that movements should ever be unsafe for anyone based on their identity or any other reason, especially not those who founded the movement! Fake allies or destructive participants in movements who make others unsafe, exploit or abuse them or constantly derail their efforts should be excluded, based on behaviour that goes against stated goals, agreements or tactics - not identity.

Of course within these broader movements there can - and should! - be groups for specific identities who do activism and fight for societal change. But movements are made up or a lot of groups and people. And movements must also have some room for people to organize around goals and not identity, because there are always people who are unclear about their own identity, whose identity is more complex, or who don’t want to be defined by it, or who define it on other terms or use other concepts to define it (cultural vs religious for example, or medical vs social model, etc), or who don’t want to/can’t disclose it, or who are not accepted by any group based on their identity - they should have ways to be part of the movements if they support the goals! And any movement also needs supporters/accomplices who aren’t affected due to their identity but who support the same goals.

tl;dr: Define safer/empowering spaces based on the identity of ppl welcome there, define movements to change society based on what goals we struggle for (kick out destructive or abusive ppl either way)

[queersplay]

This weekend QueersPlay Member Jes will be setting up a safer space at 221BCon in Atlanta, GA at Atlanta Marriott Perimeter Center from April 7-9. While Jes has been to this con several times, this is the first time QueersPlay will be making a presence in Georgia. If you need a safer space to go, we will have one set up. Just find the babe in this photo hanging out with a huge safer space sign in the vendor hall, and show us how Atlanta does it!! Always remember we love you ❤️

[resourcesforradicals]

Rules, how we use them and why they might not be as helpful as we think they are.

The really key part of this for me:

Rules need to be accompanied by an awareness of power If the same dynamics that led to the power imbalance in the first place are still active, then something deeper is needed. Hand signals, group agreements and safer spaces policies can be great aids to help us participate in groups and access shared spaces. And, to make them more effective, they need to be accompanied by a collective awareness of how power flows amongst us in groups. I think that would help us create more sustainable, resilient & vibrant groups who have a genuine understanding of, and respect for, their own diversity. 

I’ve seen so many people who critique power relations in other spaces just ignore the ongoing power dynamic issues in meetings. Watch yrself <3

[vintageplusvixen]

Safety is Personal: Wearing Your Larp Seatbelt

(Featured photo by Stephen Andrews on Unsplash.) Every time you get in a car, you put on a seatbelt (at least, I really hope you do.) Not because you plan to get in an accident that day, or because you think you are with a bad driver, but because things happen. Even with all the safe guards put in place: You have to get a license; Cars are built safer than ever with crumple zones; There are speed…

Safety is Personal: Wearing Your Larp Seatbelt

[haiguard]

[disredspectful]

Codes of conduct and commitment to follow through

That thing happened again, where I’m the youngest person on the conference committee with the most precarious position, picking fights with senior academics on the behalf of people more vulnerable than me.

Remember: if you are in a privileged position and do not practice stopping and thinking and empathising, you will accidentally sympathise with “oh no, what would the consequences be if I was wrongly accused of misconduct, that would be so sad for my career” and write mitigations for that scenario (and only that scenario), instead of the actual scenario you set out to help with by writing a code of conduct, which is “oh no, what if someone was harassed at our conference and they were vulnerable and they left and we never saw them again, and also it happened again next time to someone else because we didn’t know better.”

If you’re super worried that an anonymous report could be untrue, because you feel like the second you read a report you will immediately assume the worst of the person and it will ruin your working relationship with them and then you will feel guilty forever or something for harming someone who turned out to be innocent, do not sign up to be on the code of conduct committee.