Hi Soh! I just want you to know that as hard as this situation is, you are worth so, so much more than the way you were being treated. You deserve the chance to be seen and loved for who you are, not someone's preconceived notions about you. The people who will meet you where you are exist, and I hope your paths cross soon 💖
(also re: long hair. I know how triggering that can feel, as someone constantly mistaken for a girl because of it; but if it's literally any comfort at all, more than half of my feed is usually people thirsting over men with long hair. Which, I mean, also kind of comes across as "don't worry people will still objectify you 👍" but I mean it in a "not everyone is going to immediately jump to the assumption that you're something other than a man" way. I'm bad at this I'm sorry 😭)
WOW salsa you really did your homework to send this ask LOLLL either that or you lurk a lot more than I realized!!
Thank you so much for telling me that I deserve better. Sometimes, often times, it's really hard to know whether you're actually in a bad situation, or whether you're just being a whiny kid and actually you've gotten what you deserved the whole time. Obviously what I post on here is biased towards my point of view, but I don't think it's unreasonable to expect my partner to gender me correctly when referring to me even when I'm not in the room, for example. And sometimes I need a friend to go "thjat's insane bestie that's not normal"
I know a lot of people love me. Maybe not people I know in person, and even the people I do know in person, they love me in their own ways, too. I have a lot of amazing friends, including you, and I think I should focus on that instead of whether I deserve/can find a partner. I have a bad habit of falling into relationships one way or another because I get touch-starved so easily, and I fall in love very easily too, but I really think I should stay away this time until I at least start medically transitioning in some way.
Also I totally understand what you're trying to get at with the last paragraph. Haircuts shouldn't be gendered, basically! Men can also have long hair and therefore having long hair doesn't invalidate that aspect of my identity. Multiple people have suggested that I get a wig, but even so, I could just... not listen to my mom LOL. I think I'll ask around and make sure it's safe, but I think we're at a time where it's probably okay for me to have short hair. I really don't think my chances at getting an apartment are going to be hurt to be honest
