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my work laptop has a different keyboard and in the past 3 weeks i got pretty used to it, but not entirely, which means that i regularly mistype on both my work laptop and recently my home laptop because my brain needs time to catch up to the fact that y and z move around on the daily...

#salt.txt #which makes writing a one shot again kinda difficult ngl

need to start getting jacked because my weak nerd arms are not surviving 2 minutes straight of chest compressions

#and of course the first step of getting jacked is a good night's sleep. this is so sad #salt.txt

Every month without missing a beat there comes a time when I feel like God has left me completely and then the next day my period starts

#salt.txt #I only believe in god for the bad things

one thing about my blogging is that when i'm living my best life and have things to do, i just don't blog that much. i think this summer is great from a technological standpoint for me because i not only started a new job but i also moved away from my main pc. and so i come home and i don't play video games and i don't watch youtube or netflix and i rarely scroll reddit and tumblr. instead, i close my work laptop, spend time with friends and in the city, and i read a lot. it's great. this is what i'm trying to do while in uni: to stop staring at screens. but i'm kinda isolated in my university's city and i'm constantly under the stress of having to study. now that i work and the clock hits 5pm, i call my mom, i call my sister, i grab food, i read, i make plans with friends, and when it's not unbearably hot, i go places to chill. i've been desiring to drop screens and tech from my life as much as possible, and it seems like i'm doing it rn, which is great :)

#salt.txt #also shout out to my salary bc now i don't have anxiety about spending money. i went to a restaurant today and paid honestly a lot but #it was so damn tasty and i was there with a friend #i hope being a software engineer pays off bc this entire career change so far has been so right for me. i'm a very anxious person tbh but i #make moves all the time. i apply to commitees and internships and i move to different countries and take these challenges head on and i'm s #proud of myself this summer and these past 2 years #there's a lot of wrong with me and it's in my 3-year plan to go to a therapist and figure out how to be healthier towards myself but despit #everything i still do stuff. even if i'm terrified. even if i'm angry and sad and frustrated. at least i'm trying and that's all that #matters. and i look around and i see a couple of my friends who're terrified of change and who aren't pushing themselves bc of their fears #and i get it. i've been nauseous about everything in the past 2 weeks and i'm practically shaking in the morning about everything #but then i arrive at the office and things are chill and i'm getting used to it and now i'm at the point where i can have a proper breakfas #again without any nausea. it's epic. it took me a long time but i think pushing through and being proud of yourself for being brave is #always good. bc being brave is not about having no fears but doing stuff despite being afraid

on the first issue of watchmen and rorschach acts kind of like if a mangy alley cat wished to become a hard-boiled detective

#also i need to punch him in the face.#salt.txt

so the london onboarding went fine, i just arrived to my home country today. tomorrow i'll go to the local office and i'll see what's needed of me. i'll probably have to fill in some online trainings and stuff and i'll probably start to familiarize myself more in depth with my summer project and all the tools that i need to start using.

btw, i really liked the architecture in london; the modern and old styles were mixing so well together; it really gave for an interesting experience :)

#salt.txt #also the company is amazing ngl and their office is top tier lol

My internship has officially started, I'm in a hotel room in London for the intern onboarding, and this whole summer is shaping up to be awesome. Once I get back to the internship's city on Wednesday, the real work starts and I'm so happy with the team I got assigned. I talked with other interns and their teams don't even have projects for them yet. My team has a week by week breakdown and checklists and everything. And yeah, I'll stay in a dorm for most of summer, and yeah, I'll spend a significant amount every week to take the train and see my parents. But come on. I get to see my parents, I get paid, I'm gaining valuable experience in my chosen career field. Life can be good despite, despite, despite :)

#salt.txt #I also read a book on the plane yay :D #(it was an Avicii biography so the ending was incredibly tragic but it was such a respectful writing)

its just me and this thai cooling powder against the world

#im not gonna make it to 2027 dawg im actually melting #salt.txt

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