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I've been struggling a lot with a weird kind of burn out lately. I have the drive to draw, I have so many ideas that I desperately want to put on paper, but I just don't have it in me to draw.

For some reason it's taking so much out of me that even thinking about picking up a pen to doodle sounds so draining that I struggle to make any attempt at it at all. Experiencing executive dysfunction with art is rough.

I don't really know what to do to get out of this rut other than just waiting and hoping it goes away on its own 😭

#samael ramble #It's really difficult I won't lie #I WANT to practice and improve #I want to draw my OCs for fun #I want to draw new tattoo flash and post it on insta #Get that engagement moving again and get new clients #I want to further my career and enjoy doing it #But holy fuck man I am so tired all of the time #When the thought of even trying to draw anything feels like a difficult task to get through #It's hard to not be sad #Idk what to do other than wait and hope tbh #Vent #I guess?#I'm just tired man

I have decided that actually I will not be trying to shill my work here I will simply vibe and post whenever I'm bothered

#samael ramble #I quit my studio anyway because of my shithead ex-boss #So I'm just #Trying to recover and rest for now #Overworking yourself while also being treated like shit constantly is not good for you #I'm severely burnt out but slowly getting things done #Home tattoo studio will be a thing at some point #But for now I super just need to sleep and doodle my sillies

Guys I started playing BG3 and this is really bad guys I'm so hyperfixated I played it for over 11hrs over the course of one night and then the entire next day and I have a commission to do but I want to kiss my vampire boyfriend and kill people so badly

#samael ramble #BG3 #Astarion #Help this man has me by the balls #Bro saying shit like “saunter” and is haunted by his desire for revenge #And he bites me #I can't not fall in love???????#I may be aromantic but have you considered: Astarion is mine and I am his #Ive already had to reject Lae'zel's very VERY forward advances very early #And I'm actively trying to avoid being too nice to Shadowheart and Gale lmao #This playthrough I'm monogamous and romantic LMAO

Listen as much as there are beautiful things about being neurodivergent I really wish that the whole executive dysfunction thing would die in a fire

#samael ramble #Vent #I guess?#Ritalin is a miracle and it makes me like.. Capable of doing things at all #But sometimes it doesn't work enough yknow #If I'm exhausted or sick or in too much pain #Ritalin just isn't enough #It focuses my mind but I still can't make my body move #So I'll just be sitting here #With the drive to create #But without the ability to follow through #Yes being neurodivergent can be beautiful #But it can also cause a lot of struggle #And it can be hard to not feel a little useless because of it sometimes

I can't wait to get top surgery so I can wear boob window tops

#samael ramble

Hey don't cry, aquarium soap, okay?

#My tattoo studio bought new soap #You guys have no idea how excited I was to see aquarium soap again #At the ripe old age of 24 i get to hold aquarium soap in my hands again #I genuinely did not know this stuff still existed lol #So here #I will share it with the world #I hope you all enjoy #samael ramble

Accidentally closing the tumblr app and resetting my entire feed and just giving up on using the app for the day

#samael ramble

It is simply not possible to make ravioli without casualties

#Samael ramble

#samael ramble

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