#samhel

[sesiondemadrugada]

I Cut Your Flesh (SamHel, 2020).

[saphylee]

2 Leonie, 4 Tamralan, 6 Samhel, 15 Sylathi, 19 Thel, 20 youuu

2. what sort of things does your muse look for in a partner?

Leoni admires independence in people. She knows compromise happens in relationships, but she doesn’t want someone mold themselves to be the perfect person for them, because she won’t do the same for them. And she admires those who can lead their own lives without demanding she be at their side. She wants to compliment and add someone’s life, not take it over.  She has built walls up over the course of her life and isn’t necessarily looking for someone to tear them down, but if they should, they can’t come in like a wrecking ball. Too much prodding and pressure and she’d turtle up and stay tight lipped. So patience and kindness is a must. She would do they same for them.

She wants someone she can trust with everything she is and to be in love with her best friend.

And if they want to partake in sparring to stay in shape, that’s a bonus. ;)

4. what is the lowest and highest age person you’ll ship with your muse?

For Tamralan, since he’s in his early 40′s, I follow the 10 above/10 below rule. 30 is pushing the youngest for him since experience has them both in totally different places, so he won’t actively pursue someone that young. However, he’s not going to turn away someone in their early 30′s should he fall in love with them. Anyone in their 20′s is a huge no. 50′s is fine, but if they’re in their 60′s or older, again, they’re in a different place, so he wouldn’t actively pursue them either.

6. has your muse dated before? if so, how long did those relationships usually last? 

Samhel has dated in the loosest sense of the word. Like he would have crushes and sneak off with people to kiss, but they never lasted long, maybe a few weeks tops. It wasn’t a huge priority to him when he was more concerned with surviving in the Halamshiral alienage and working to help his moms. And after believing he lost them, he’s really not interested in being in a relationship.

15. if your muse is uncomfortable in a relationship, will they address the problem or keep quiet?

Sylathi’s tendency is to keep quiet. It feels safer as she doesn’t like to confront people. Sometimes though, most times, that makes everything worse. Over the years though, with the influence and guidance of her best friends and family, she grows to bring up anything she’s uncomfortable with in her relationship. And more times than not, she and her partner end up closer than before. And she hopes her partner feels comfortable enough to do the same.

19. is there someone your muse has a crush on, but who you don’t actually have a ship with?

Oh lord, like usually if Thel has had any physical attraction to someone, there’s a ship for it, or we work to make the ship possible. I don’t make the rules for my slutty son (I say this with so much affection for him). There’s a couple that comes to mind, but I know wouldn’t happen or become anything more than a fling or hookup. But that’s okay. Thelrand has ~plenty~ of ships.

The first crush that came to mind is Gael Hawke (@lavellanlove)(it wouldn’t let me tag you??). Part of that is wishful thinking on my end because I ~adore Gael with all of my being. They had ~one~ scene together and they had good chemistry and would be a ship that, if it ever happened, Gael would bring out Thel’s goofy side that he shoves down with his perfectionism.

The second one is Delrin Barris. *swoons* I love this man so much and he deserved way more than what he was given. In modern!au, they have a great friendship, and they goof off together and have so much fun, and it’s ~perfect.~ Thelrand would literally be falling in love with his best friend, and he already loves him so much! I don’t know how compatible they would be in a relationship, but that would be something fun to explore.

20.  what would push you to drop a ship?

Is it possible to have so many ships that when you get a new one, it just knocks one off? Of course not! I love all my ships and don’t drop them lightly. However, I have dropped them for the following reasons:

Losing touch with the other person. This one is less of a “drop” and more of a “dormant.” I still have a ship that I hold dear in my heart from like 2010, but I am no longer friends with that person, so I really don’t think about the ship often, but when I do, it’s usually with fondness.

The ship is superficial. Like it’s obvious that the ship exists because they look good together, not because they’re compatible. At that point, I’d just write it off as a fling.

Too much drama. Anyone who writes with me know I *love* my drama. Drama pushes the plot, flavors the writing. But even I have my limits, and I’ve learned them after having to correct the many mistakes I’ve made over the past decade I’ve been rping. I’ve lost ships over this and almost lost some of the most important and loved ones.

I don’t have energy. Again, this is more of a “dormant” thing, but sometimes, especially if the ship is a new idea, I just don’t have the energy to commit to writing a new dynamic. It’s worse if I wasn’t completely into them to begin with.

Entitlement. Sometimes I think I’m guilty of this, though I really try not to be. Having people push me excessively for content makes me less likely to want to do it and it sours the ship they wanted content of.

This isn’t inclusive. Just stuff I thought of on top of my head.

[saphylee]

❝ if they do it again, you tell me. ❞ for Lee & Samhel

Drills were done hours ago, but Samhel remained in front ofthe targets. The knives were missing their mark more times than not, thoughthat hardly mattered. The stuffed dummies were the only thing he could throwthem at without getting in trouble. Well, in more trouble than he already was.

Upon collecting his knives from the targets, he heard agaggle of giggles behind him. Every time he moved, or dropped a knife, it feltlike it was louder and more frequent. He snuck a look behind him and snappedhis head back, grinding his teeth. It was Jeremiah and his group of chickenshitfriends he kept around to feed his ego.

Just ignore him. Just ignore him. Samhel went back tohis mark, making eye contact with the man which was his first mistake.

“Hey, Sammy!” Jeremiah slung his arm around Samhel’sshoulder.

“It’s Samhel,” he replied curtly, then attempted to shrughis arm off. “If you don’t want to get stabbed, I’d recommend moving your arm.”

Jeremiah scoffed. “What, like how you stabbed your captaintoday?”

He locked his jaw, forcing himself to look at the target. Hetightened his grip on the handle, then quickly flicked it towards the target.He let out a short breath when the man finally took his arm off his shoulders.

“It’s a classic rookie mistake to bring your actual weaponsto training instead of the blunted ones. And on the day where Commander Cullenwas there, too. Makes you wonder what was going through Thel’s mind, huh. If hemade the right choice, choosing the crazy knife-ear over someone who knows whatthe fuck they’re doing.”

Samhel continued to ignore him, just throwing knife afterknife, imaging Jeremiah’s ugly face on the dummy. He often wondered sometimeswhy Thelrand chose him over Jeremiah, who everyone else sang praises over. Henever asked, almost afraid of the answer. He smiled a little when he managed tohit between the eyes of his target each time.

“Hellooo? What the fuck are you smiling at? Did I saysomething funny?”

Turning to him, Samhel threw the knife down betweenJeremiah’s feet. Naturally, the man jumped back, and he stepped forward. “Yeah,and I know that one’s sharp, asshole. Believe it or not, I do know what thefuck I’m doing. If you’d stop sticking your head so far up Cap’s ass that hecan taste you, maybe you’ll see that. And don’t think I didn’t see you snoopingaround my shit this morning while I was getting ready.”

Jeremiah’s eyes narrowed. “Do tell, Sammy, what are youimplying?”

Samhel shrugged. “I don’t know. Jealousy is a funny emotion,ain’t it? Must be hard to watch the guy you want to get on your knees forchoose some ‘crazy knife-ear’ over you. Oh, he probably remembered what a totaltwat you were when you drunkenly declared to the entire tavern that you wishedyour father finished the job with the Halamshiral elves. Yet all you’ve donesince you got here is try to get into the pants of one.”

The man scoffed and glanced to the side at his friends witha shaky chuckle. “What good does those ears do for you when you still can’thear shit.” He pushed Samhel back with a hand on his shoulder. “Though you didmiss the part where I told them about fucking your moms before – “

Samhel saw a flash of red, and popped Jeremiah in the nose,then tackled him into the ground. He could only get a couple punches in beforehe was pulled up by the bastard’s friends, kicking out his feet, landing acouple hits on his gut.

Jeremiah pushed himself up while holding his stomach. Hegrunted and wiped the blood from his nose, glancing at the offending color onthe back of his hand. The confrontation, although brief, had attracted a smallcrowd. The corner of his mouth lifted when he glanced around. He stepped backand Samhel was released.

“Ah ah,” Jerimiah warned with a wag of his finger whenSamhel stepped forward and kept his hands raised in a show of surrendering.“You’ve got an audience and I’m the only one injured here, Sammy.”

Samhel’s eyes darted from face to face around him and felthis pulse elevate more. He could feel the sting of tears welling in his eyes.As he turned to leave the scene, a heavy hand clamped on his shoulder. Heflinched and glanced up to the amber eyes of the Commander.

“Come with me. Both of you.”

 -----------

Samhel sat on his cot in the barracks, leaning his elbows onhis thighs, and kept his eyes on the floor. He wrung his hands and bounced hisleg. His hair formed a curtain around his head. It made him feel separated fromthe dozen or so people he shared the room with and he was grateful for that.

He saw their feet before he felt someone settle beside him,the cot sinking under their weight. They raked their nails gently over his backand said nothing for a while. He couldn’t stand the silence. “Lee, please saysomething or I’ll go mad.”

Lee carefully tucked hair behind one of his ears and liftedhis head with a hand under his chin. “Commander Cullen already gave you anearful.”

He turned his head, his curly hair slipping from behind hisear.

She resumed the gentle scratching on his back. “You barely saida word to him and just let Dubois do all the talking, all the blame falling toyou. I know you didn’t attack him without reason. Will you tell me whathappened?”

He rubbed his bruised knuckle and sighed. “He’s been…messingwith me for a while.” He looked up to see if anyone else was paying attention.That the few others in the room quickly looked away told him that they were. Hescowled. “Can we go somewhere more private?”

“Of course.”

The stables weren’t necessarily more private with the stablehands and horsemaster Dennet about, but they barely paid them mind, and thesurly looking fellow wasn’t around. They sat on a bale of hay, and Lee foldedher hands in her lap. “You said he was messing with you?”

“…Yeah. I knew him. From the alienage. He didn’t live thereobviously, but he was one of the chevalier hopefuls that got their kicks out offucking with us. Mostly the kids. I’d stand up to them, get their attention offthem, and come home black and blue. Sometimes one of my moms, Sena, would getinvolved.” He paused, chewing on his lip. “Jeremiah talks a lot of shit, but noone ever touched her.”

Lee nodded in understanding. “I…did remember hearing about his…escapades. I hoped most of it were just drunken boasting. I’m glad thatpart of it wasn’t true.”

“Yeah, he’s just a chickenshit whose daddy got him out oftrouble because he was Chevalier. Jeremiah never joined, but still likes tomake it seem he’s a seasoned warrior, that I’m inferior. Even going so far to sabotagemy training to make me look bad. Telling me last minute that training timeschanged, misplacing my weapons, changing them….”

Lee pursed her lips, then grabbed his hand to hold in herlap. “If he does it again, you need to tell me.” She leaned to catch his eye. “Imean it. Don’t think that Thelrand and I are blind to this, but it’s hard toaccuse and punish if you never say anything and lie when we try to help.”

Samhel nearly pulled his hand away, but relented and sighed.“I believed him, okay? Everyone fucking loves Jeremiah so I believed for the longesttime that Thelrand didn’t make the right choice. And now that I stabbedhim –“

“That was an accident, Sam. If you had known that your bladeswere sharp, you wouldn’t have sparred with him.”

“He could have died!”

“But he didn’t. Thelrand is fine and he doesn’t blame you,and he does not regret choosing you. You need to remember that. And rememberthat Jeremiah was chosen for a squad long after you because while you believedthat Jeremiah is so loved, we can see what kind of man he truly is. IncludingCommander Cullen, which is why all he did was talk to you.”

“Really…?”

“Yes. Thelrand thinks he’s a bit of a cunt.” She chuckled. “He sees so much potential in you.” She pushedhair behind his ear and cradled his face. “You remind him of himself when hewas your age, and he wants to help you as someone had helped him.”

She wiped the tears that were now falling, and then pulledhim into a hug and tucked his head under her chin. “You’re not alone. I knowyou’re still hurting, but I’m here for you.” After a long moment, she pulledaway enough to kiss his forehead and cupped his face. “Thelrand asked for youearlier. Do you want to go see him?”

Samhel nodded and smiled. “Let’s go.”

[watching-pictures-move]

Put On Your Raincoats | Green Hell (SamHel, 2019)

As you can guess from the poster and tagline, the second half of this is a rape scene, which presents some obvious unpleasantness. This is another horror porn hybrid as SamHel's other films have been, so it's not like the subject matter is unexpected or anything, and not judging anyone who gets off on this, because *pulls up disclaimer about sexuality being complicated and what have you*. But I think the bigger problem is that his style isn't as on point as it's been in those other films (the one sort of effective touch is the slurred audio evoking the villain's headspace), so what happens doesn't play with a lot of force or verve. The American flag is displayed prominently during all this, which I assume is an attempt at provocation, especially with the deranged misogynist villain, but it never coheres into any actual commentary.

But the first half of this, before it gets to the horror part of the horror porn, I did enjoy. It's a consensual domination scene between two characters (one of whom is the victim in the second half) shooting a porn video, although it doesn't reveal that right away. While this has certain edgier elements (the domme threatens the sub with a big fucking combat knife), the playful banter undoes any real meanness, and I'll say it, makes what transpires pretty hot. Also it must be said the actress playing the sub, Felicia Fisher, has dimples and a Descendents tattoo, so I was not immune to her charms.

[watching-pictures-move]

Put On Your Raincoats | Piggy Palace (SamHel, 2022)

This is the first film I've seen from SamHel, who I understand does the horror porn hybrid thing, and this one combines both sides of the equation through a pair of gruesome masturbation sequences. Which are honestly a lot less off putting than that sounds, as there are obvious cuts before the movie dishes out any gore. Plus it must be noted that Agatha Delicious, who I was previously unfamiliar with, and Madi Collins, whose work I am familiar with , are easy on the eyes.

There are allusions to Robert Pickton to lend this some level of unseemliness, but for the most part that element manifests in the pig squeals on the soundtrack and the porcine accoutrements adorned by the actresses, and there's probably some forbidden fruit stuff going on in my subconscious as I don't eat swine, but I thought the latter element was kind of sexy.

Anyway, SamHel probably has different turn ons than me, but I appreciated the commitment of the actresses in carrying them out. Plus there's a pretty effective ambient score, followed by a blast of death metal with the death growl replaced by pig squeals.

[lugnut13]

[lxdf]

One more for the collection. #greenhell #movieposter #samhel #feliciafisher #billyboston #torturewolf #conjuntof 3.2.2020 (em Guará, Distrito Federal, Brazil) https://www.instagram.com/p/B8HhgrdFxD8/?igshid=1vdni8pdvdv9g