Jun 16, 2014
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Devout Coffee Fremont, CA
Devout Coffee Fremont, CA
People tell me time and time again they love my photos or I'm a great dancer. My brother tells me, oh this girl loves your photos, or someone says my friends feel so honored when you like their Instagram photo. It's flattering, and I genuinely appreciate it, and it makes me feel good. But I don't deserve that, who am I to be worthy of such compliments. And do I genuinely believe them? Yes and no.
Yes I believe that my work is 'good' but no because I think its not good enough. And I'm not fishing for compliments and I really don't mean it in a cocky way at all, I don't think I am an amazing artist or dancer or anything like that. I believe it's good because I really try hard at it. But am I trying for myself, or others.
I realize, I do all these things, like dance and photography, and design, because I love it, and at the same time it's because I'm insecure. I do all these things, to make myself appear a certain way, confident. And I do these things because I love the way it makes me feel, even before anyone else has anything to say about it. I think I do all these things to make up for my insecurities, don't get me wrong, I love doing what I do.
So it's just been a question today and these past few days, I'm confident, but there's something else that makes me shove it down and remind myself to keep working hard because it's not good enough. Even if I do things for other people's approval, I always still do me.