#sarcasmfish

[kagetsukai]

All sorts of questions? Do the other dogs I bark at think I'm big and tough? I need to know. I'm worried.

Hmmm... good question! :D

If you bark at the small dogs, they probably think you are big and scary and are trying to establish dominance over them. The big ones probably think you are trying to play and will respond likewise. But then again, what do *I* know? I‘m a cat person :P

[lavalampelfchild]

(This is topical for you!) Warden x Alistair meet at a Renn Faire AU!

Alright, so let’s do the more-than-three-paragraph challenge(because I tried it with three sentences, and that just plainly was not enough;these little shorts can get way too out of hand sometimes!) for Alistair xWarden meeting at the Renaissance Faire! I’m going with Aja for the Warden (for obvious reasons, I think? ;D)

So here is the Renaissance Fair AU, featuring a weird hybrid of Thedas from the DA universe and actual historical periods!

The man standing next to her in line was wearing a set ofchainmail and the most realistic tabard Aja had seen so far at the fair.  His sword and shield – models, obviously –hung at his side and back respectively, and it really looked like he was bornto it.  It was a beautiful combination,and he looked quite handsome in the whole thing, but that wasn’t the reason itcaught Aja’s attention.  Or, at least,not the whole reason.

On the front of the tabard was a griffon, the symbol of thefamous Order of the Grey Wardens.  Aja’sown costume had the exact same symbol, which was surprising.  She hadn’t thought the order very popularoutside of a very specific group of scholars dedicated to its research.  And technically, they weren’t an order thatwas prominent in the Renaissance, but when she had tried to point that out toJowan, he’d stared blankly at her until she stopped talking, and then proceededto shove the costume into her hands as though she’d never said anything in thefirst place.  

“Excuse me?  It’s yourturn.”

Aja jumped slightly and turned embarrassingly wide eyes tothe man next to her, for a moment completely unable to comprehend what any ofthose words meant.

“What?”  Mr. GreyWarden grinned and jerked a thumb toward the vendor.

“Your turn,” he repeated. Aja turned to look blankly at the stand and, belatedly, her mentalfaculties returned to her.  Her faceburned with embarrassment and she dropped her head to her hands to stifle hergroan.

“Oh, I’m sorry, thank you!” She scurried up to the vendor, acutely of aware of Mr. Grey Warden doingthe same.  She placed her order, heplaced his, and she awkwardly waited for her food while putting more effortinto avoiding his eyes than she’d ever put into anything else in her life.

“So… I notice you happen to be dressed as a Grey Warden, andI should warn you, that means I am duty-bound to introduce myself and ask yourname.  So.”  Aja barely had time to turn her head and facethe man before he stuck a hand in front of her, grin – perhaps slightlynervous, or was that just her? – still on his face as he said, “I’mAlistair.  May I have the pleasure ofyour name, fellow Grey Warden?”  Aja hadto chuckle at that.

Well aware that her face was still very warm, and that hercountenance must have been very clearly broadcasting her embarrassment, Ajareached out and grasped Alistair’s hand. Should I curtsy?  Is that what people do at Renaissancefestivals?

“It’s very good to meet you, Alistair,” she replied. “I’mAja.”

Alistair nodded and opened his mouth to speak when thevendor called out that their food was ready. Aja made her way to the stand, but Alistair beat her to it, grabbing histurkey leg and hers in one smooth motion. Aja felt her face heat anew as he smiled and handed one to her.

Turkey legs.  Totallylegitimate Renaissance food.  Aja hid a snortby taking a bite of it.  

“So,” Alistair continued. “You’re a mage?”  He gestured to her outfit, the homemadestaff, and Aja hastily wiped at her mouth with a napkin, nodding.

“I’m told it runs in my family,” she explained, enthusiasticallyfalling into the tale.  She hadresearched this.  “Magic, I mean.  Once, the Amells were very powerful; therewere records of the family in the Circle. Oh, that’s my family, by the way. This was before the Purging of the Magi, though.  After that, all record of most magicalfamilies seems to be very sparse, and my family is no exception.  But! But, I learned that, if I concentrate, I can slightly increase ordecrease the surface temperature of my skin, and what else could that be butresidual magic—”

She was rambling.  Oh,dear, she was rambling.  Aja quicklyclamped her mouth shut and turned her attention back to her food.  “I’m sorry, sometimes I can get a little…overly excited about this kind of thing.”

“No, no, I think it’s great, I love history lessons overturkey legs,” Alistair assured, voice light, tone full of amusement.  Aja turned to shoot a playful glare at him,even as she fought down a laugh. Alistair grinned and held up his free hand in a gesture of surrender.

“No, I’m serious—”

“Alright, then, clever man, tell me about all this, then,”Aja interrupted, gesturing to Alistair’s own outfit with her turkey leg. “Yourturn to talk while I eat.”  She drewherself up with an air of mock-condescension and Alistair laughed.

“Fair enough,” he acquiesced. “Now, this may be a littledifficult to believe, but I am not the one who decided on this fine ensemblefor this grand event, and you and I are not the only ones here in the honorablegarb of the Grey Warden.”  He paused andturned to point in the direction of the jousting tournament.  “The rest of my group is watching the jousting, and they’re all dressedas either scouts or berserkers.”  

Aja quickly swallowed another bite and waved her hand atAlistair’s sword and shield props.

“So that’s why you chose to be one of the sword and shieldwarriors?  Stand out a bit?” she asked. “I’ve read that those were some of the most famous amongthe Grey Wardens’ ranks.”  Now it lookedlike it was Alistair’s turn to go a little red. He huffed out an awkward chuckle and shrugged.  

“Not quite as glamorous as having an old family connection to some long dead famous templar or something, I know,” he said, andthen paused.  His brow furrowed and helooked away for a moment.  Aja foundherself unconsciously mimicking his expression as she waited for him tospeak.  Oh, no, she hadn’t said anythingwrong, had she?  

Half-eaten turkey leg forgotten, Aja took a tentative steptoward Alistair and opened her mouth.  Tosay what, she didn’t exactly know.

“So, I know this is probably awkward, and we just met andall, but I was wondering if you might like to… accompany me back to the tournament?”  The words tumbled out of Alistair’s mouthbefore Aja could get so much as breath of air in.  

The offer hung between them, and they stood there frozen,staring at each other.  Just as it seemedthat Alistair was preparing himself to backpedal, Aja shook herself out of hertrance and offered as warm of a smile as she could manage.

“So, the Grey Wardens stick together, do they?”  Was she trying to flirt?  Maker, she’d never flirted before in herlife!  Except that one time with Cullen…but that had ended terribly.

At least Alistair’snot running away…

Alistair laughed, some nervousness still clinging to hisvoice, but at least he wasn’t repulsed by her poor attempts at banter.

“I don’t know, do they?”he asked, waggling his eyebrows.  Ajaoutright snorted at that.  He was eitherjust as unskilled at this whole thing as she was, or he just enjoyed playing itup for laughs.  Taking another bite ofher legitimate Renaissance snack, she stepped in and presented him her arm.

“They do now.”

[littlesnowarrow]

30 Things Meme

Oh my! Thanks a lot @sarcasmfish! I’m sorry I’m seeing this now, but here are the answers!

Nickname: Snow

Name: Irene

Gender: Female

Star Sign: Libra

Height: 5′7″ and lots of other numbers behind the 7

Time: 22:32

Birthday: October 18th

Favorite Band: Imagine Dragons

Favorite Solo Artist: Between Trevor Morris and Ed Sheeran

Song Stuck In My Head: The Hanging Tree (HG soundtrack)

Last Movie I Watched: Dunkirk

Last Show I Watched: The Crown (very British lately!)

When Did I Create My Blog: I think October will make a year! Woah!

What Do I Post: Tons and tons of Dragon Age, with occasional shieldmaidens and some Aloy. And animals!

Last Thing I Googled: "aloy funko pop”. Not even sorry

Do You Have Other Blogs: And more porn blogs harassing me? No thanks!

Do You Get Asks?: Sometimes ^^

Why Did You Choose This Blog Name: I’m tiny, I love snow, and I always play as a ranged character, so there you go!

Blogs You Are Following: 208

Followers: 54

Favorite Colors: Blue, green... mostly cold colours

Average Hours of Sleep: Around... 8-9, more or less

Lucky Number: 21

Instruments: I played the flute in high school, but I’ve always wanted to learn how to play the violin

What Am I Wearing: Floral shorts and a tank top

How Many Blankets I Sleep With: Good lords none! And just one in winter.

Dream Job: I’ve got to a point in my life that pretty much don’t care ^^' But I’ll become a vet one day

Dream Trip: I’M GOING TO SCOTLAND FOR MY BDAY HOW AWESOME IS THAT

Favorite Food: Italian, because it’s convenient and common, but I’d like to try out more of the Asian cuisine

Nationality: Spanish

Favorite Song Now: Aloy’s Theme - Horizon Zero Dawn

I’m taggy tagging @novamm66, @slothquisitor, @rhetoricalrogue, @thesecondsealwrites, @swiggle-muffin, @jiruchan and @the-emerald-halla. No pressure at all!

[trulycertain]

@sarcasmfish replied to your photoset “Aaand it’s back to purple. At this rate, the folks at the corner shop...”

I love it and am soooo jealous!

@cherieofthedragons said: Oh oh oh how utterly gorgeous!

@musicalheart168 said: It looks so good!

Thank you so much! I went natural for a while and do every so often, but apparently I always feel more like me with purple hair and sod-off combat boots (got those cobbled recently, feel much better for being able to wear my favourite pair again, so back to status quo it is). Apparently my marker for stability in my life and how well things are going is “Has she got all her hair cut off and dyed it purple? Then she’s on the mend.”

Shouldn’t detract too much from the job hunt. It’s definitely purple rather than red, but it’s not as if I bleached it and went lilac, so not too distracting.

[slothquisitor]

sarcasmfish replied to your chat

All stories need more dogs, imo.

I keep telling @thesecondsealwrites this too!

[scottishvix]

Replies and an update

@lechatrouge673 said: Luck, darling, and all my love. I'm here for you. 

@slothquisitor said: Ugh. I'm sorry you're still feeling awful. *hugs*

@sarcasmfish said: I wish you more than luck! I wish you health! Keep us updated and remember we're all here for you for anything!

@casforpenelope said: Oh, poor Sai! I am so sorry! That is so frustrating. I wish I could help. Snuggle those puppies and feel free to come to us if you need anything!

@kagetsukai said: *hugs* I'm sorry this is such a shitbucket :( I'm here for you if you need it!

Thank you guys so much! I cried reading these replies because it means so much to me to have such a lovely supportive group of people I can turn to. I really haven't spoken to anyone outside my family about this yet - partly because I haven't been able to leave the house. I'm just back from the doctor so update under the cut. 

He's given me something to try and settle my stomach, so I can hopefully get back to normal. Though his attitude was basically, “tough, any treatment would have had these side effects.” If I need this treatment again, I think I'll preemptively ask for something to deal with the side effects.

Other than that, it's a waiting game. I'm to go back in a month and if the abscess hasn't gone down further or has got worse again, I'll be referred to the breast clinic for an ultrasound. That sounds scary, but it's more that they are specialised in performing and interpreting those scans. That could both confirm the HS diagnosis and settle whether I need more aggressive treatment. 

But he did confirm this could be my life now. People with HS can have a flare up every couple of months or go years between attacks. So we’ll just have to wait and see. But it's so much easier knowing I can turn to you guys when it gets tough. 

[withthebreezesblown]

Could I ask for The Star with Alistair and mabaris?

Thank you for the prompt!

The Star - Time to pause and reflect, contemplate what’s precious and what’s not.

He’s laying in the grass, panting, thinking that he can’t remember the last time anyone did anything with him that left him out of breath. Despite the sun and the fact that he’s a sweaty mess, when Arlessa curls against his shoulder and throws her head across his neck, he doesn’t have the heart to push her away. Of course that means a moment later he finds himself the bottom of a mabari pile up as Grigor and Matins compete with her to see who can have the most body parts strewn across him. He just laughs, petting blindly at either a head or a butt.

He doesn’t get this often, this bit of time entirely to himself without worrying about what time he has to be at what meeting, without his leisure being parceled out in bite sized portions between a thousand things that demand his attention.

It isn’t, any of it, anything he ever thought his life would be, not in Eamon’s stables where life was simple, and not in the Chantry where life was all a duty he hadn’t chosen. Not in the Wardens, where for one beautiful moment life was full of noisy brothers and camaraderie and the glory of battle. Not beside her, where everything was frantically trying to save the world and the kind of fierce falling in love that swallows up everything around it except for archdemons.

But it’s nothing, either, like he thought it would be when she looked him in the eyes and took away the future he’d wanted with her and replaced it with this burden he never had.

Maybe she was even right. Not about him exactly. He’s nothing special. Anyone with any decency would do what he does. But there are worse things than nothing special. There’s greed and bigotry and ignorance and cruelty, and they’re all of them more common than it was so easy to believe back then. So he does what anyone with a little decency and a lot of power would, exactly as she knew he would: he pushes back. Maker, if he’d known the puckered looks of discontent it would bring to invite the woman he’d named the Bann of the Alienage to council meetings, he’d have done so long before. It’s become his unending goal to disgust the people who disgust him, and he takes a thorough, intentional delight in every success.

Laying here in the fields just outside of Denerim, sweaty and out of breath with his dogs heaped on him, this is precious, but these are not the only precious moments he has to look forward to. One day this week, someone will look at him and think he is a travesty of a King because he doesn’t play at politics with the callus, impersonal touch of a politician, and someone else will look at him with desperate gratitude that they have been seen and heard and acknowledged, and, well, both of those things are a little precious too.

[wonderlandcrows]

sarcasmfish a réagi à votre billet : I’m having the same problem as this dude (...

This happened to me, too. I took all my saves all out of the save folder until there was only the most latest one. It happened several more times at different spots and I kept having to do the same thing. Hope this helps?

thank you :'0c it doesn't hurt to try!