Dec 22, 2017
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Profound Thoughts about a show where mostly naked oily men pretend to fight each other?
My new avatar is from Chris Jericho's entrance movie, one of my favorite wrestlers AND entrance videos. I loved the Save_us.222 campaign, and I adored his heel turn, where he shed all likable traits (which made some fans cheer him more out of respect). I never caught the first promo where he explained why he changed from Save_us.222 to Save_me until a few years ago. Watching it, I understand it a lot more now, he isn't saving the fans from boredom, he was trying to save himself from the fans.
But I have to say I really liked my initial thought about it better. I thought that somewhere, deep down, Jericho (the character, not the man portraying him) could see his spirit slipping away, as he eroded. The titantron deal was him saying "Save me from myself." even though nothing could fix a broken soul.
I've been feeling a lot like the latter thought, which is why it's my avatar. I feel like I'm slipping away into something I don't want to be, and that the voice, the little voice I try so hard to shout, is getting muffled, by what I don't really know. I'm not sure where I'm going, and I'm not sure I like where I'm going, but I do, I'm wishy washy and my heart and mind is going places I'm not sure I understand.
I'm not even doing anything that different, at all. Maybe that's the problem. Maybe I'm tired of complacency, or tired of sitting around not doing anything with my life. I'm basically Milo at the beginning of Phantom Tollbooth; when I'm HERE, I wanna be THERE, and when I'm going THERE, I wanna be back HERE. I'm eternally grateful for what I have, and for the wonderful people who make my life worth getting up in the morning (seriously, go follow sebenfusion).
Basically I'm a twenty year old who's going through teenage emotions. I wonder if my medications are still messing with me, or if nothing's really changed at all.
And sorry for the rant, just thinking through the internet, which is totally not grasping for attention (I'm feeling pretty low on self esteem at the moment too, sorry.
