Oh gosh. The difference between the way Sam & Dean talk to John on the phone at the beginning of Scarecrow (1.11) is heart-breaking. They’ve both been worried sick over John, and Sam shows that 100%. Then Dean takes the phone, just as anxious and upset, & in 7 seconds (yup, I timed it) his face evens out, his shoulders square, and a “Yes, Sir” comes out of his mouth. In 7 seconds, John turns Dean from scared son to perfect soldier.
7 seconds.
God, sometimes I forget how far Dean has come in these 15 years, but this re-watch is reminding me of just how sad, scared, and closed-off Dean Winchester used to be
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 2/?
Fandom: Supernatural
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Ellen Harvelle/Bobby Singer
Characters: Dean Winchester, Castiel, Sam Winchester, Eileen Leahy, Bobby Singer, Ellen Harvelle, Garth Fitzgerald IV
Additional Tags: Soulmates, touching your soulmate turns the skin blue, Flirting, light angst because dean, Scared Dean, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Gay Castiel, Mechanic Dean Winchester
Summary:
Touching your soulmate for the first time turns their skin a brilliant shade of blue, which happens to scare the shit out of Dean Winchester.
Second chapter is up. Get ready for some angsty Dean and supportive Castiel!
Dean on a plane needing comfort from me (my name’s Amanda by the way, lol). Except, I’m also afraid of flying, so I do a horrible job and he ends up comforting me. Fluffy please!
Your name is Amanda!? No way! I have a bestie named Amanda!
@amanda-teaches
Your foot was tapping against the floor of the airplane. You felt physically sick as you clutched the barf bag in your hand.
To distract yourself you turned your attention to Dean, the look in his olive green eyes might have amused you if you didn’t feel the exact same as him.
“Dean,” you muttered, “Take a deep breath, we’ve barely been in the air ten minutes,”
Dean let out a breath, his fingers clutching the arm rests to his left and right, he turned to you, trying to brave a smile.
“I’m fine.” He said, although the squeaky tone of his voice said otherwise.
You swallowed, a bit of turbulence hit and your hand shot to Deans, clutching into his skin, your fingernails piercing his flesh.
This of course didn’t help Dean any with his unease. He just cringed as you released him, pulling your hand back.
“Sorry,” You muttered, biting your lip as you looked at your lovely boyfriend.
Your heart was beating a mile a minute, every bad scenario running through your head. Anything that could possibly go wrong right down to the most minute thing causing the worst kind of problems.
You swallowed, turning back to Dean. You could see he was trying to relax himself, but to no avail. Gently, you took his hand and gave it a squeeze. “We’re fine,” you said softly, “We’re okay, we’re just… thousands of miles in the air, and if one small thing goes wrong we’ll all die.” You had no idea where that came from, but wow it did NOT help.
“Not helping, Amanda.” Dean muttered through gritted teeth,
“Sorry.” You muttered, this time you were the one who’s voice went about as high as the plane you were in.
When Dean recognized the state you were in he couldn’t help himself. He hated seeing you bothered or upset, even when he was terrified in one of these flying death machines.
“Hey,” He gently squeezed your hand, “Look… we’ll be fine. It’s just a plane right? I mean… how many of these go well? A lot more than have gone wrong.” He nervously talked through his fears, just wanting to see you more relaxed.
His heart was beating against his chest, he was still scared, but as he carefully distracted and comforted you, he began to ease up.
It wasn’t too long before he had you smiling again, and that’s just what he wanted.
By the time the plane landed you were both still a little unsettled, but after eight hours on a damn plane the only thing you really focused on was being with Dean.
You were scared, but at least you knew you could count on Dean to take your fears away, even when he shared those fears.
Dean Winchester, when NOW faces with panic, pain, anger, or practically any emotion, does not go wide eyed.
But i miss this... Here, Ill show you a pic of him panicked, fearful, and broken from way back then...
See that? Thats true "Scared little puppy" kind of emotion as he calls out for his brother, trying to scream through the veil to his brother who stands not 8 feet away. You can see how broken he is at the end of the gif too, how upsetting it is to not have his brother even twitch at his attempts to call for him...
Now, check out a random one from 9.
Now, we know he obviously isn,t in anywhere near the same situation... He inst trying to called out for someone he loves, not trying to pierce the veil. Hes TRYING to be bad ass, trying to be intimidating... He seems to do that a lot. But that's the problem. He doesn't let his guard slip for a minute. He tries not to let a single drop of emotion slip through his walls. We no longer can see any fear in his eyes, no more emotional pain...
Hes changed. He, in my opinion, is still trying to be "Daddy's blunt little instrument."
