Death. A Rant by a Scorpionic Ragey Libra Jerk.
Why do we give it so much power over us? How weird is it, that we're the only thing on this planet that mourns it's own mortality.
I feel, with having a Scorpio Rising, has given me the insights to being strong with out knowing it. But I think for any Scorpionic placement to be strong, you have to surrender yourself to it's Plutonian nature.
My mother died two years ago. She lived with her illness for maybe four or five years. Before that even happened, my biggest fear was the loss of my mom. She was my best friend in this life. At one point my only friend. So I cowered before the idea of her death, even to a point where I swore to the universe to take me out before her.
Then she got sick, and Reality moved in. Saturn, or Pluto, moved right in. I had no choice but to face that reality. I guess I could have lied to myself, but I had this innate prowess that told me to face it, deal with it, because it'll be better for you in the end.
So I did. I sacrificed my later teen years, and early 20s to stay at home, and be with my mother. I had this gut reaction that told me to stay and value every day of it because Death was coming, and it's coming for us all. I don't say that to morbid, it's a fact of life. I don't say it to strike fear in you of it. I say it to wake you up, and face it. Look at life with open eyes, and it's not that scary.
She passed away two years ago. I lived through my biggest fear in life. In accepting Plutonic Nature: Death. I was stronger then what I could have guess. There are times now, where I feel so hopeless, but then I remember the fact, nothing scares me. Nothing has power over me anymore. I have seen my fear come out from under the bed, and manifest right before my eyes.
I do not regret one day of it. I have no resentments over it. The only thing I hate, is the fact I forget how strong I really am. With no oppositions in life, you have nothing to test your true power against, you forget how strong you really are.
It is said, Scorpio Rising is the hardest in astrology to deal with. It's because we're not lucky enough to go through life with a blindfold, and someone telling us it's all going to be okay. That lie is the most dangerous thing in our minds. Again, I'm not saying life is shitty, and awful. But to understand that parts of it is, you learn to appreciate the beautiful things, the people in it, the moments that make the whole.
So I really don't understand why we have this stupid, childish, romantic views on death. This goes right with stories of Santa, Tooth Fairy, and Prince Charming. Why are they held in such regard at this day, and age.
This has been a Rant by Your Local Ragey Libran/Scorpio Rising jerk. I swear I have a bright and shiny side to me!
