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am i. maybe. writing again

maybe!!!

(i have not updated this fic since 14 Apr 2024, although i have noodled with it a tiny bit in my word document in the intervening two and a bit years, so it hasn't been a COMPLETE pause. but. it's been fairly extended nonetheless) (no guarantees as to whether i'll actually manage to post anything)

#scriofa #this is the reincarnation fic hence bullet imagery is not anachronistic #BUT to be honest even some late oral tales have guns in them #there's a version of oidheadh chloinne uisneach that has a gun in it iirc

so i think láeg is a character that you can detach from violence (though not from hierarchy, really, except through its subversion) because the role of driver / advisor / intermediary / friend / medic / double is something that can apply in a lot of circumstances. this can exist outside of a battlefield. he only kills people sometimes; it isn't fundamental to him

however. cú chulainn does not meaningfully exist without violence. this watchdog is an obligate carnivore, you know? it is his entire raison d'être in a lot of ways. you take it away and you hollow out everything that makes him what he is. that's what warrior aristocracy will do to a guy, that's what giving up your name to be a watchdog will do to a guy, that's what fame and a short life will do to a guy. you can shift the metaphor and make it into something else but it's always going to be a metaphor for violence and defence and territory and borders

(not that i haven't tried. i made him a ballet dancer. the violence slipped through eventually)

but how might you redirect or reframe or reimagine that defensive role, in a world after violence, in a world beyond war? where might you channel it?

i'm thinking about the reincarnation fic that I've been stalled on for two years and how all the pasts that they remember are of dying horribly and that question of: is there another way we can live? if we find each other are we surrendering to this same pattern again? will it always end the same way?

láeg can exist differently. can cú chulainn? much to think about.

#did I spend tuesday evening quaker meeting thinking about this? MAYBE A LITTLE BIT #ulster cycle #i don't like maintagging this but for organisational purposes I want to be able to find it again #scriofa

i can't believe i looked at a text and was like "okay but it kind of feels like these wounds were supposed to be fatal though. what if i wrote a really sad fic in which he actually is dying during this scene" based on a bunch of vague hints in the text and then it turns out that was just straight-up in the text the whole time it just got abbreviated out of 90% of the manuscripts lmfao

tfw your AU (of a fucking fifteenth century text!!!) turns out to be significantly more canon-compliant than you realised once someone looks at some more manuscripts

#oidheadh con culainn #scriofa

anyway I have two (?) fics in second person

of grief and glory is about cú chulainn during táin bó cúailnge. it's fully second person with an unidentified narrative voice; cú chulainn is the "you"

dindshenchas is a cú chulainn/láeg fic also set during the táin. it's narrated by the landscape of ulster, which is addressing cú chulainn, but there are also some apostrophes that are not directed at him and almost ARE directed at the reader, or at least at A reader/listener

i like writing cú chulainn in second person. it's probably my favourite way to write him specifically

#I should do it again but it's been ages since I wrote any fic #fic brain broke #scriofa

hey i reread the blackberry beard fic (not a second person fic) and it's really good actually. past me nailed that one

#scriofa #hard to believe I wrote that in like one feverish evening #iirc #edit: okay it was two days not one. that tracks. however it was still very fast #for something that might be the best thing I've written #and certainly the horniest lmao

trying to fight my writer's block by writing extremely explicit and extremely weird smut about two of my OCs that i made when i was like 15 because there's basically nobody in the world i could show it to even if i wanted to which really takes the pressure off feeling like it has to be good

#scriofa #we're 2671 words in and this guy is. going through it. mostly consensually #like did he know what he was letting himself in for? no. would he have said yes anyway? yes.

got stressed wrote nearly a thousand words of gwydion/pryderi fic how's it going with you guys

#i haven't posted any fic since may last year because i keep starting stuff and then abandoning it #so. no guarantees that i will actually finish this one either #but. yunno.#scriofa

reading lymond will have you thinking things like "ah yeah I should make my OCs worse and my stories more incomprehensible"

#and the thing is. you're probably right #at least if you've been reading a lot of modern stuff recently and have let current standards get to you lololol #lymondposting #scriofa