dear Sen,
dear sen.
though it wasn’t you that i sang to that day in the middle of the fucking night. i guess we ended up bonding pretty well. and i don’t mind your messy place as long as you don’t bring the mess to mine. really, it’s not even that messy. it reflects you perfectly to be honest. the paint everywhere, the unfinished paintings, the scrambled up papers and the splatter. i can see you in everything. because within that mess, beyond what you first see, there’s also beauty - art. art which comes from hard work and many times of failure, splatter and messes. i’m not trying to justify your mess ( i still hate that a little bit ) but i’m saying it’s kind of cool. and despite this i can find you being a good friend in times where i don’t even know how to use my messy brain. though you’ve told me what to do a thousand times ( just! do! it! ) and i know that you’re right, sometimes i just can’t do the right thing. but you must know that already, that i can’t do anything right anymore. that’s already proven - i am the outcome of a row of bad decisions and you, you are a part of a puzzle i can’t figure out. i treasure you and the moments we have together already, i keep them in my mind like precious memories. you’re beautiful, smart, creative– and don’t get me wrong, i am saying this in the most loving way ever; you’re such a mess.








