#batman#bruce wayne#dick grayson#batfamily#tim drake#batfam#dc fanart
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Post-Ana recovery
Today I had a lot of comments about my pink side cut haircut and grey contact lenses, that I'm not natural and I could be a lot more beautiful if I was natural. It really bothers me because I have little to no self-esteem so I'm like "am I faking myself?" but also I don't want to go back to natural because I appreciate myself a little more like that (well the grey lenses are just for fun until I get my appointment with the ophthalmologist) so I don't know what to think... Today I feel like I assume myself more than before, I try things I never did before (dyed hair, asymmetrical haircut, better makeup...) but there is always people who tell me I'm too extreme? Too much in the unnatural? It doesn't help with my self-confidence... Pictures are from 2011, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2015, 2016 and 2017.
Planta tu propio jardín y decora tu propia alma en lugar de esperar a que alguien te traiga flores.
Starting as we mean to go on.
The Anitidote to New Year's Resolutions - filling your bubble with joy!
I’m not a New Year’s Resolution kinda woman. I used to be. I can still feel the distant call of the ‘I must lose 100LBs this year,’ but I silence it with another Ferro Roche. Some years I hear the distant thrum of ‘I should do more exercise,’ or the pull of ‘I’ll swim the channel,’ – even though I haven’t swum in years. I ignore these calls and grandiose claims. A self-fulfilling prophecy,…
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Anything goes...
Anything goes…
I was born in… well, we can gloss over that. Let’s just say that my childhood was spent in an era of extremes. War and calls for peace dominated the headlines, crooners shared the charts with pop groups, hemlines varied between revelation and medieval and most married women… and God help you if you weren’t… still stayed at home to raise their children.
My mother had already broken that mould by…
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My first relationship ever is with this guy who doesn’t want it to be serious. So we hang hang then bang bang. He wants it to be casual. But as a person who’s never dated guys or really ever had good experiences with guys, how am I supposed to know what casual is?
Idk how to act around him, and im supposed to not catch feelings. I don’t really touch him or hug him... the only time we cuddle is after” the do”.
Why am I still in this relationship? He treats me nice, we get along, it’s alright.
I know why.
It’s because after having so many crushes and being humiliated by almost each one— after being brainwashed by society and its beauty standards— i grew to hate my dark acne prone skin, my height, and my dry 4c hair.
Any type of attention I’ll take. Even if it’s just sexually and not emotionally. I accepted this type of love bc i think I deserve it.
I don’t respect or love myself as much as I should. I was never really taught that ( im not blaming anything on my mom, she’s an angel) but i never learned much about self-care( just the basics).
Im trying to learn all of this, love and care, and maintenance its hard. I don’t know if I have enough patience for myself.
But im trying
10/01/18
I feel like all I’ve wanted for the longest time, since literally the start of high school is clear skin. My skin feels like it has gotten progressively worse post high school and I’m at a point where I’m so done with my acne. When I look in the mirror sometimes I want to cry. I just hate the way I look so so much. What a depressing thing to say. But i feel so stuck because I’ve tried every lotion and cream and thus I have deduced that my acne is hormonal yet I’m not prepared to trade in weight gain & mood swings for clear skin. If I get fat what do i have left really? That’s such a horrible thing to say, but deep down that’s truly what eats at me and I’m thankful no one reads this. But I think body image in general is something I’ve always struggled with. I can’t remember the last time I looked in a mirror and was happy with the way I look. I have my theories about how I turned out with this damaged mindset but I cant be bothered to type them all out. I’m sure this sounds like such a whinge from a girl who is actually quite lucky and privileged compared to majority of the world. But I can’t help how I am and the fact that I can never be happy when I look into a mirror.
