Mar 28, 2018
Scissors
What feels better than that?
I cut myself last night for the first time in 8 years.
I knew I was better than that,
And I deserved to feel better than that.
But I wanted to taste what it felt like again
To have a blade so cold and close to my skin,
Just so I could feel again.
And I felt it.
The cut. The sting. The blood.
In that order too.
But how ridiculous is it, that I'm an adult stuck living with a mind as compulsive as a child's.
I'm not going to lie, it felt exhilarating.
But that taste in my mouth turned sour almost immediately.
Alone, afraid and vulnerable was all that the scissors had left on me.
Where do I go from here?
