#selfship brainrot

[xen-blank]

and ofc we have....... the xennielings

[xen-blank]

you guys chose the outcome (tw: body horror, death)

Log 1:

When everyone talks about the world ending, I would've thought it'd be some slow shit like global warming. Who would've guessed it was gonna be started by Xen?

For the past months, we knew they've been messin' with that magical/cursed water. I mean, the worst that could've happened was just them turnin' into some animal, we thought. They'll be fine. Spoiler: it wasn't fine. One day, Xen's sick, miserable as all hell, and everyone's terrified.

Maybe I should've been more worried. But they had everyone else ta worry over them, and I could keep my peace away from the germs. It's how it was normally handled whenever Xen was sick, anyway, so how could I have fucking known.

I dinnae know if anyone is actually readin' what I'm writing or if this will just be useless in a few weeks when we're all eventually dead, but it what people normally do when they're surviving some apocalypse, aye?

The others are fine for now. I've hacked into most of the cameras around town to keep an eye on things. But can I be honest? I still cannae bring myself ta look at Xen anymore. Everyone else wants me ta keep tabs on them, report on how they're doin' because they're all still worried. But fuck me, what do they expect me ta do?

Xen looks awful, is that what they want me ta say? That I find them on the cams just for them to practically sense I'm watchin'. Their eyes are massive. It's like whatever happened to them heard that people think big eyes are cute and a smile is friendly. Nothin' very appealing about an exposed spine and fungus and spores and the mutilated version of yer lover.

I hope they're not in pain, but that's probably wishful thinking on my part.

Status:

Xen: "Patient 0" - Sorry, luv. I really am. Infected. Not violent, but anyone in contact with them becomes infected. And the other infected are much more aggressive, spreading the disease through open wounds. Appearance: Large eyes, larger eye sockets, wide jaw with too many teeth, upper spine exposed, polypores all over, limping and slow. Anyone readin' this, yer lucky Xen was always the artist.

Eli: Alive.

Cole: Alive.

Scale: Alive.

Erik: Alive.

Me: Alive.

Log 2:

It's been about a few days. Everyone's been told ta stay inside and keep windows shut. As long as the infected dinnae see you, then yer fine. But people've been runnin' outta food, and the government is doin' fuck all because of course they are. They'd rather shoot down the infected rather than keep the current people alive.

I've been fine on food. Never thought I'd actually need to dip inta my supply of extra food in the case somathing like this happened, but I cannae complain. It's the others that are worse off.

Transcribed from a text conversation:

Scale: How's everyone doing? Eli: I'm worried. Scale: About? Eli: I don't know, Scale. Look outside and pick anything, and it'd work. Anon: The army is currently in yer area, so ye might be the first of us ta be quarantined off. Eli: Do you know where Xen is? Anon: ...I can check. Scale: Honestly, if you could, that'd be great. Eli: What if they get killed by the government? Cole: Why would you even suggest that? Scale: Oh, we got one of the hermits. Anon: If we're lucky, Xen might just be taken for government testing. Eli: That's lucky??

Eli's been getting anxious. Honestly, I wouldn't have thought that was possible if I dinnae know the guy for who knows how long at this point. Erik refuses to respond in the group chat anymore, probably hiding underground like he used ta. Cole, fuck as if I know where the bastard's been. Best I can get is seein' him on cams occasionally till he runs off again. And Scale's been doin' the best outta all of us. He's been killing infected with the Order of Assassins, but it's really just workin' with the gov without the actual affiliation. Maybe being told what ta do by the OoA makes him feel better about it.

From watchin' these infected for the past days, it dinnae seem that hard ta avoid them. The real problem is Xen. Around them for long enough, and their spores will get ye. They've been on a little statewide tour right now. I'll need to do some more work ta keep a better eye on them soon.

Status:

Xen: Missing. I'll find them soon.

Eli: Safe

Cole: Missing

Scale: Alive

Erik: Hiding(?)

Me: Fucking whatever

Log 3:

Transcribed from a text conversation:

Eli: Guys. Anon: Calm down. Scale: What's going on? Eli: Don't tell me to "calm down". You'd be terrified too, asshole. Anon: The government officials who sectioned off Eli's area were infected. Eli: HOW CAN YOU BE CALM ABOUT ABUY OF TJSI Scale: How'd that even happen?? Anon: Maybe use your damn brain. The infected transmit the disease through open wounds and can die from normal weapons. Scale: Yeah?? Anon: Except for Xen, dumbass. Eli: (photo) Eli: Oh my god. Cole: I'd recognize that eye. Even with the color drained from it. Scale: Not the time, dude. Eli: You need to hear this. Eli: (audio recording)

"Eli? Is that you?........Let me in. Please. I'm scared...It's dark and cold out here................I can see you."

I can still hear that audio recording when I try ta sleep. So I just stopped tryin' ta sleep.

It sounded too much like Xen. It is them, and it knows us. I dinnae know how much of it is actually them, though, or even if they know what're goin' on. But they targeted Eli, so there's still some of them in there. That might be the worst part about it.

Status:

Eli: Infected. We don't know the details of what happened, Eli stopped messaging us soon after. Whether he was turned instantly or if it was a slow sickness like when Xen was first infected. All I know is that a week later, I saw him roamin' around. Appearance: His bones are literal hooves now, stickin' out of his legs where they should be. Shoulder blades grew wide out of his back and have feathers now, not like he can fly wit' em. It's a very ironic infection, aye?

Log 4:

Somatimes I wonder if I'm not doin' enough ta help. Other times, those other bastards pull some stunt that makes me know they were hopeless from the beginning.

The reason Cole's been missin' is because he's been looking for Xen himself. He can barely fight, but at least he can sneak around. Big deal when it's a fuckin' airborne infection. Honestly, he's just falling into Xen's trap. Or maybe they knew he'd go lookin' for them in the first place.

I won't claim ta know Cole well, and I am givin' him a hard time. But I'll be honest, I do question if he wanted ta go out that way. At least he got a choice in it.

Fuckin' hell, though, is his infected self a pain in the arse.

Status:

Eli: Infected. He looks lonely.

Cole: Infected. I watched it happen, it was the way I realized in the first place. Ye know, I've never seen him look so...relieved? He doesn't leave their side anymore. Appearance: Bones shifted him into being quadrupedal. His spine pokes out like he's matchin' Xen. I'm sure he'd be happy ta hear that. And his jaw, fuckin' hell. More rows of teeth than needed.

Scale: Alive. But the OoA has been spreading out more thin ta cover more ground. Scale said he almost begged ta stay nearby.

Erik: Spotted. I assume it's him, the only guy goin' in and outta the opera house. At least I'm sure where he is now.

Me: Growin' headache. At least the other two are keepin' safe.

Log 5:

I don't even know how I'm still...sane? Or maybe I've lost it a while ago and accepted the new reality. I'd prefer the former, but let's be honest with ourselves here.

The government forces have slowly been drained, so it's every man for himself at this point. Maybe it was better for Eli and Cole ta be taken out earlier on. That's some kinda fucked up, positive spin on it, aye? I've never been good at it, anyway.

Yu was helpin' out.

Yu Yu. Like Xen's brother Yu. The god or whatever.

He'd been around, helpin' people escape from infected, deliverin' supplies for those in need. He visited me once, and we spoke through the door. I think it was more of a formality. He asked if I needed anything, but other people need things more at this point. Neither of us brought up Xen.

One thing he had mentioned, though. The reason he was the only one down here was because Olympus was on lockdown. He can visit since he can travel back and forth whenever, but Earth's now "too high of a threat". Apparently the other gods want ta do something ta help, but they've been locked in. What kinda gods even are they.

I'm...avoiding the actual topic I started writing this log about. How do ye even go about explainin' it?

He died not too long ago. I saw him run inta Xen for the first time since comin' down here to help us pathetic mortals. They spoke for a bit. Or he spoke ta them, I guess. Even Cole, Xen's lil attack dog, dinnae do anythin'. I've never seen Yu actually emotional. Or emotional when it wasn't anger.

I clicked away for a bit, but when I came back, Xen was lyin' on top of Yu's body. There wasn't blood or anythin', but they just stayed there. After a few hours, the body was gone.

I definitely don't think there was a fight. Or even an infection. I think Yu just lost hope. He did always like humans. Seein' them die or get infected all the time around him must've fucked him up.

Status:

Xen: Mourning(?). They haven't moved in days.

Eli: Neutral. He's been keeping in groups of other infected.

Cole: Missing. He tried to get Xen's attention, but at some point, he ran off. Makin' my life harder by havin' ta keep tabs on him again.

Erik: Suspicious. I don't trust him.

Log 6:

Xen went missing. I initially though they went too far, and I didn't have a camera to reach them yet. But when i spammed through all of the cameras, I realized the opera house looked different.

The doors were broken through. Not from the outside, but the inside. I could only find cameras of the inside of the opera house, none underground since I was never allowed to set any up down there. Would've been real useful by now, am I right?

But nothin' looked like a struggle. More like a lure.

Transcribed from a text conversation:

Anon: Erik, I swear to fucking god. Anon: Respond. Anon: What do you even gain from this? Scale: ?? Anon: I think Erik has Xen. Scale: What. Anon: @/Erik Anon: @/Erik Anon: @/Erik Anon: @/Erik Erik: I took precautions. Anon: "Precautions" my ass. You sit underground all day and have the health of a dyin' Victorian man. Erik: You said it yourself. They might be taken for testing. I wouldn't let that happen. Anon: So? Erik: If needed, I'll do it myself.

Maybe just because he felt obligated to, but Erik gave us some updates on how Xen and he were doin'. He wears a gas mask on 24/7, so not much different from his normal mask. There was a point where he implied something had happened, but refused to elaborate.

I swear, even though they're some infected creature, if they were hurt I'd be so fuckin' pissed.

Status:

Xen: Contained. As far as I know.

Cole: Rampaging. He looks like he's lookin' for Xen, so to cope with it, he kills anything that moves. Infected killing other infected.

Scale: Stressed. He's been textin' me privately more. I mean, without other assassin's I guess I'm his only human connection.

Erik: In danger. Or maybe he is the danger.

Log 7:

Xen's been showin' up outside. Of my door. I can hear them call my name, so I just stick on my headphones and try ta ignore it. Sometimes they cry, sometimes they beg. Sometimes they're quiet.

They leave occasionally, but they always come back.

I can't even look through the peephole to see when they're gone because they're always starin' back at me through it.

Status:

Xen: Hurt. Fuckin' Erik. I can see their arm is missin'.

Eli: Fine(?) He found Xen again since he was first turned.

Scale: Missing. He stopped textin' and won't respond ta me, neither.

Erik: Infected. He's not violent, but he's almost aimless. Appearance: He's all skin and bones. Like some rottin' corpse but ye can't even tell where the bone begins and where the skin ends. As grey as he looks, his veins are so fuckin' red, and they look like string suffocatin' his body and limbs.

Me: Trapped. God, get me out of this place.

Log 8:

Scale's gone, who woulda guessed? Sent me one final message that was a picture of a handwritten letter like some dramatic farewell. Even readin' it, I thought it was ridiculous. Just because I knew it wouldn't actually do anythin'.

Transcribed from photo:

Scale: Hey, Anon. Just thought it'd be fair to tell you what's about to happen before it...happens. The Order of Assassins tasked me to try to kill Xen. Guess I was first up since I was already, technically supposed to do it a long time ago. I don't want to predict anything, but whatever the outcome is, I am sorry.

He knew he couldn't do it. But direct orders.

Status:

Xen: Happy. Must be nice havin' the biggest threat on your side now.

Scale: Infected. He put up a good fight. Well, he didn't fight at all, but none of the rest of us could've pretended like he did. Appearance: Arms stretched into some gross wings. Every joint has bone spike shit stickin' out, the spine is the worst. He actually can fly because fuck the rest of us, right? There's no reason he should still have the cognitive ability ta use a dagger.

Me: Fucked.

Log 9:

I don't really know why I'm still writing these, at this point. Or alive. Xen's been livin' outside my door at this point. Guess it's because everyone else has been infected already. They're real smart about it, too. Sittin' at my door lets the spores creep in through whatever cracks they can. I've been feelin' sick.

Log 10:

Deus Ex Machina, literally. The other gods showed up and fixed everything. Guess it took one of their own ta die for them to do somathin' about it.

Anatole cured the infected. The dead are still gone, and everything is destroyed. But damn, I never knew I could actually miss the sun till now.

The healing for the infected could only do so much, though. Most people were treated in whatever buildings were left standing, but Xen and the others were brought back ta Xen's home. I made my way there myself, but I haven't moved around in so long, so it took a while. It took a few days for any of them ta wake up, though.

They all still look awful. All of them are malnourished, scars where their bones and limbs were stretched around. Hell, they couldn't even fully revert back. Xen and Cole still have too many teeth, and Scale and Eli's bones aren't shaped naturally anymore.

Xen wasn't happy when they woke up. They were last to. Findin' out they started an apocalypse, infected nearly the entire world, and their brother died at once was overwhelmin' ta say the least.

We've been tryin' to see what started it all, but the gods insisted they'd manage the investigation. Fair enough, at least they won't die over it. Seems like they might be changin' their policy of not interfering with human lives as much, now. The Black Plague was one thing, and this was somehow 100x worse.

I dinnae know how ta end this. By now, I expected I'd get infected by Xen at some point like the others.

I did try ta ask if they remembered anythin' at all while it was happening. It took some...pressure, but they said this:

Transcribed from video recording:

Xen: I was just lonely, I guess. (shuffling in their bed) Like I needed something but I had no clue what it was. I remember random bits where I distinctly thought of you guys, but they'd be gone again after I felt like I was so close. Started with Eli, I think. I know I thought about you a lot. Everything was a blur. Like literally. I guess kinda like now, ha. (sniffle) If any infec— anyone was even around me, I don't even know...if I. Knew.

Status:

Xen: Alive. Missing an arm still, but it's better than nothin'. Blind as well. Guess their eyes being warped did more damage than expected. Most of the time, they stay locked in their room cryin'. They feel guilty.

Eli: Alive. He can't walk properly anymore, so he uses forearm crutches. He makes the best of it, though. Glad ta see he's doin' his best ta bounce back.

Cole: Alive. His jaw being fucked and there being extra teeth in his mouth ruined his throat, so he can't talk anymore. Shun's been teachin' him sign language, but he skips it to cling to Xen's side. I'd judge him for it, but Xen's been miserable.

Scale: Alive. Says he's considerin' amputating his arms soon to get prosthetics. They don't work anymore after bein' bent outta shape and into wings, and he needs them for his work. But between that and killin' Xen, he says he's fine with the choice.

Erik: Alive. The moment he woke up, he put his mask back on. When it comes to the infection, he reverted the most back to his original appearance. But the trauma of it probably doesn't help the original trauma of his normal appearance.

Me: Alive. I got it best, I guess.

[xen-blank]

He Won't Shut Up

great :/ you befriended xennie's boyfriends. but now you've signed up for them constantly talking about their partner. my f/os x platonic!reader. yeah thats right. you. yes YOU 🫵 are involved now. because you all totally asked for this

The sun shined brightly down on you as you sat at a cafe table. Your drink of choice sat in front of you as you stared at the view in front of you. Honestly, you never thought you'd see the day.

Across from you sat your friend. And to their side?

It was the person who they've spoken about so much and so highly that they felt more myth than reality.

Xen was nice, albeit a bit awkward when you were introduced to them. Though, to be honest, you were as well. After all, you felt like you knew everything about them already from their name to their mother's maiden name.

What was even more awkward was how differently your friend acted around them. If eyes could get any softer, you might've been a little concerned

At some point of the conversation, your friend excused themself to go to the restroom, leaving you and Xen in an awkward quiet.

"So," they started. "I've heard about you occasionally. I'm glad to actually meet you."

"Yeah, I've heard a lot about you, too," you chuckled, pausing when you saw their expression jolt into surprise before twisting into excited curiosity.

"Oh, now you've GOT to tell me."

(Have fun. Each section is separate so their info won't be consistent.)

You had actually met Eli at this same cafe. Your orders were called at the same time and he commented on how what you got looked good. The two of you chatted for a bit, and actually seemed to have complimentary personalities.

What you didn't expect was that after that he'd drag you around everywhere with him.

The first time it was sudden.

"Pleaseeeee come with me," you could hear his pout over the phone. "I'd ask Xennie, but they hate parties and they're so sleepy right now. You should see them, they're so cute— AH! No, focus. Please, it'll be so fun!!"

"Eli, it's 1 in the morning..."

"I won't ask you ever again!"

That was a lie.

You basically became his go-to person when he wanted to go out. Maybe it was a little flattering knowing that someone surrounded by people so often did actually value your company, but damn was it hard to keep up with him sometimes.

Well, okay, you weren't his "go-to" person. You'd see his social media posts of some events he'd go to without you, and every time they'd be flooded with pictures of a specific person. But it didn't take a genius to know it was the "Xen" he'd go on and on about at any chance he'd get.

Honestly, it took you a while to realize that he and Xen were dating. He was always around other people, how were you supposed to know!

When you finally got confirmation of it, it was one very late night. Eli was sitting across from you in a booth after the two of you decided to go eat at a restaurant to end the day. But the way he kept sighing every time he looked at his phone was strange.

Not exactly "strange", he'd do it often to try to get people to pay attention to him. But strange because he actually seemed pitiful.

"What's going on?" You finally asked when he sighed again, even after his dessert showed up at the table.

He dropped his head to the table as you prepared yourself for whatever could be bothering him right now, but the last thing you expected was him to shove his phone screen in your face to see a picture of the person all over his social media accounts.

"I miss my little Xennie so much...! They're probably so cold and lonely at home right now," he was so fervent about it that it was hard to get a look at his phone through the way it kept shaking in his hand.

He pulled his phone back, and you could see him type up multiple messages before deciding not to spam their phone.

It was hard to find a way to reply to him, your mouth struggling to get a sound out. "Don't worry, I'm sure they're fine—"

"Have I ever actually told you about Xen?"

His eyes bored into yours with a familiar glint. A threatening one. That said "please let me talk about them or else". And knowing that Eli was the type of person to always carry a horse whip around with him, you didn't want to test what his idea of "or else" could be.

You sighed, getting comfortable before gesturing for him to continue.

Honestly, the first time you met Anon was unconventional. For lack of a better term.

You had been waiting for weeks for a game to come out. It was one you had been anticipating for years, actually, and your local game store had a limited edition version of the physical copy of the game. So as soon as you could, you ran over to grab it.

And there it was. One final copy, and it was y—

Your hand landed on the game at the same time as another person's.

Both of you reeled back in shock. Your eyes darted back over to it before he quickly grabbed it before you could. The game you had been waiting for was now in the hands of some glasses-wearing ginger.

He shoved the game under his arm as he pulled out some hand sanitizer just from the tiny contact with your hand. "Ye know, I'd apologize, but I'm nae sorry."

Okay, he didn't need to add that.

With a smug wave of the game, he left you standing there as you had to resign yourself to getting the normal edition of the game.

And that was the last time you'd ever see him, you so wrongly assumed. The next time you saw him was at an internet cafe where he sat in some back corner. One that you tended to gravitate towards to avoid the louder gamers in the front.

You almost didn't recognize him until you heard his Scottish accent calling out to you.

"Would ye look at that! Yer the person I snagged that game from, aye?" The snicker in his voice was hard to miss as you debated ignoring him.

He held up a hand. "Ack. Sorry, sorry. C'mon, if ye hear me out, I can give ye a limited copy of the game."

"This is sounding a little shady," you frowned. Though you still sat at the computer next to him to hear what he could possibly say. On his screen, you could see he had discord pulled up.

"Fair enough," he chuckled. "But I needed ta get that copy of the game fer my partner. They're obsessed with that typa thing."

"You didn't need to add the jab at the end, though."

"Yeah, Xen said that as well." He let out a laugh, tying away at something. "They said, if I could find ye again, ta give ye this." He dug around in his bag before fishing out the video game, dangling it in front of your face.

"What? I thought they sold out weeks ago." You turned it around in your hands to make sure it was real and not just some extremely well-made replica.

"I know some people. And Xen knows some other people," he shrugged. "While yer here, wanna hop on this game with us?"

You watched him switch over to a different window, seeing one of your favorite online games on the screen. And you did have time to kill...

"I guess I could," you sighed, turning to the computer in front of you.

"And fair warnin': I let Xen win most of the games, so I will be sabotaging ye."

Cole was a massive loner, you were shocked enough that you actually befriended him.

But honestly, most of your "conversations" just consisted of him talking your ear off about his partner. You probably knew their name before you even knew his.

Should you have been concerned? Maybe.

From the way he spoke about Xen, it sounded more like withdrawals from an addiction rather than a boyfriend simply missing his partner. The way his body would tense and his eyes would dart around wildly as if wishing they were actually there.

He'd go to you any moment he couldn't be with them because they were busy with something else. And each time you'd get comfortable before asking the usual question.

"So what's Xen done this time?"

And it'd send him into some mad ramblings about how they held his hand or smelled nice or made him lunch or breathed in his direction. Honestly, you could get away with zoning out a few times before he'd notice and test if you remembered the last few things he said.

You could almost be convinced Xen was actually a fictional character. With how he described them as so perfect. But the only thing that reminded you they were an actual person was Cole's frustration whenever the two of them spent time apart. If they were fictional, he must've had some intense delusions.

You also considered Xen being some cult deity if it weren't for how defensive he got whenever you expressed an emotion a bit too positive towards his stories he told about them.

That's not to say he was a "bad" friend. The two of you have had conversations that didn't involve his partner.

If anything, it felt like he physically couldn't help bringing them up.

"Would you like to come with me to this bakery? It's Xen's favorite, I'd like to get them something."

"I'd rather not watch this movie. No offence, but I'd rather see it with Xen first."

"Oh, I've been here before. With Xen, of course. Nice park, they even renamed it after them."

One night he showed up at your place without warning. You've never seen his home, so honestly, you weren't sure he had one. He did always make a point to call Xen's place "their home" and not "my" or "our".

He hesitated at the door. "It's starting to rain, and your home was the closest."

You looked over his shoulder to see the slow start of raindrops, some remnants on his clothes. "Why didn't you just go home?" You asked, though you still stepped to the side to let him in.

"Oh, I couldn't possibly," he dryly chuckled, finding his spot on the couch and placing a bag on the ground.

He didn't elaborate after that, and he didn't seem in the mood for conversation either, staying silent as he pulled some things from his bag. His body was positioned to hide what he was doing, but when you tried to sneak a look, it seemed to be a photo album.

As he shuffled through a pile of pictures, you caught a glimpse of a dimly lit room and someone asleep in the bed.

Yeah, maybe you should've been concerned.

You had known Scale for a while. Long enough to know that his behavior had definitely changed.

He had been a dramatic and pessimistic person for as long as you knew him. And he definitely was still dramatic, but his usual "kill this" or "slay that" attitude was replaced with something way too affectionate for an assassin.

Not like you were against it, he was your friend, after all. It just felt...uncanny.

It was hard to miss when he'd suddenly get phone calls and think he was subtle ending the call with saying "ninja kiss" and quickly hanging up. Or when you'd hear him giggling to himself before vehemently denying it when he'd notice your presence.

You almost thought he was possessed or something at first. He had mentioned that happened a lot with his work.

But one day, he had left for a minute, leaving his phone with you. You wouldn't have thought much of it if it weren't for it to suddenly start ringing with the caller ID of "Angel" with a heart emoji next to it.

The polite thing would be to leave it be, but with the buzzing, it threatened to fall to the ground. And in your attempt to be a good friend, you quickly caught it before it fell. Accidentally pressing the answer button in the process.

"Hey, Sca—"

"Sorry, not Scale!" You quickly cut them off. "He left for a minute."

"Oh. Okay." The frown in their voice was audible, but you assumed it was directed more at him not being there. "Well, can you tell him to call me back when he can."

"Sure—"

You jumped out of your skin when Scale came back and grabbed his phone from you. His glare deadly before he noticed who was on the other side of the phone. The instant blush that bloomed on his face was a little laughable.

"Xen...! What— What're you, uh, calling about?" He paced back and forth, running his fingers though his hair. "You're not in trouble are you?"

"Xen" huh? Well, that definitely wasn't the same as "angel".

You looked over at him as he barely remembered you were even there. Did he actually give someone a pet name?

Oh, he's definitely not possessed.

"Okay," he paused in his pacing, nodding. "Okay, I'll see you later. Bye, baby."

He hung up, and you couldn't help but let out a small laugh.

"'Baby'?"

You watched the way he jumped, whipping his head to remember you were there. He almost looked ready to throw one of his daggers at you before remembering that would be a bad idea.

"How much did you hear?" His voice was up an octave before he quickly tried to fix it.

"All of it? I was sitting right here."

"And it's not...weird or anything?"

You shrugged. "I mean, a little, but as long as you're happy."

The tension in his shoulders disappeared so quickly to the point you almost thought he'd pass out. With a long sigh, he muttered a "thank god" under his breath. But after a few seconds he turned to look at you.

"So that means I can tell you about them without you judging, right?"

Xen hummed, listening to what you recounted to them. Their neck was craned back to stare up at the sky as they rocked back and forth in their seat.

"Well, as long as he's said good things," they barked out a laugh.

They were probably a bit too used to their boyfriend's antics to think much more of it...

"I can at least say, for a matter of fact, that he's very in love with you," you rolled your eyes. But you were the one who always willingly sat through his rants.

"Honestly, I'm glad." they paused before frowning. "Glad about you bearing with him, not about the— Well, I am glad he loves me, but—" They sighed. "I know he can be a little, uh, overwhelming?"

"Who's overwhelming?"

Their boyfriend made it back over to the table, cutting off the conversation. Xen glanced over at you before cracking into a small grin.

"Don't worry about it."

@casp1an-sea @sillyslipperybananapeel @edith-is-a-cat @crxxws @covett-lovett

[xen-blank]

all my f/os but dressed up how id dress them because good gods some of them need it

long ass title 🙁

(this took me 13 hours 💀 free me)

are these canon to their actual styles? yeah no but this is just clothes id put them in while still trying to stick to their personalities. im not a fashion expert i just like pretty things alright

thought process for each design under cut vvv

satan: academia style obviously. he NEEDS earthy tones it just suits him better. honestly i was torn between a sweater or a sweater vest but i went with the vest anyway. while i do think he’d look nice in like an off-white shirt as well, the brown shirt just gives him a more put together vibe. i also gave him a ton of silver jewelry because idk despite him being “preppy” he still has like a slight edge to him? if that makes sense lmao. the snake bite piercings and glasses were just for fun though tbh. also i gave him a fidget ring (the one on his pointer finger) because i think he deserves one.

lucio: rich man with expensive tastes. honestly he was the second most difficult to come up with something for. i wanted to go for a new money look without just grabbing gucci or whatever. all ik about lucio, he loves fancy shit, deep v-necks, and more form-fitting clothes. honestly i could’ve put him in an all white and gold outfit, but his favorite color is red so i decided to incorporate that. and obviously it has to all look, and i say this in the most affectionate way, gaudy as fuck

julian: GOTH GOTH GOTH HE NEEDS TO BE GOTH. i really don’t have much other input. i know i wanted to give him a coat and a corset. other than that i really just cobbled together things from different references. ALSO GOTH MAKEUP i mean cmon i had to. i also gave his shoes some extra height because the 6’4 guy needs to be taller right?

eli: yes i put him in a skirt, i think he looks great in skirts. honestly, his was slightly difficult to design since i think he’d look good in a lot of styles. but i tried to go for something based on his usual outfit so i just went to pinterest and looked up “preppy” tbh. as long as he stays adorable i really don’t care ISNT HE SO CUTIE PATOOTIE omg sorry gotta stay professional anyway. uhhh also i just chose purple as the main color just because it’s the single color not in his hair so the beret wouldn’t clash lol 😭

anon: bastard… WHAT WHO SAID THAT?? anyway his was the most difficult to come up with. his normal style is literally just “comfy casual” like cmon give me more to work with. initially i wanted to go for something based on techwear, but it just didn’t suit him that well so i leaned more towards streetwear than tech. honestly what’s the point in drawing a guy in streetwear if his ass doesn’t leave the house 🙁 anyway joking aside, i did wanna keep the bright teal of his jacket so i used it as an accent color at least. also the mask is just because…i wanted to

cole: this guy was also difficult but in a “idk what style to even begin with”. his usual outfit isn’t much to go off of, but then i imagined him in a shirt with a long-sleeved undershirt and went from there. it’s kinda basic but i think a simpler style suits him. what do you mean the crossbody bag is big enough to conceal weapons. what do you mean the dark colors make it easier to hide at night. what do you mean the lack of accessories help him stay quiet. what.

@cloudcountry @dove-da-birb @casp1an-sea @krenenbaker @the-banana-0verlord @edith-is-a-cat @gloomy-gores-world @vivigoesinsane @theleechyskrunkly @l7k-a @shinysparklesapphires @v-anrouge

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send an ask and ill. assign you one of my f/os i think youd be related to. because why not

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how i think you guys see my f/os

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“we saw nothing this isn’t a repost” we all say in unison

@casp1an-sea @sillyslipperybananapeel @edith-is-a-cat @shinysparklesapphires @xryptik @kittys-mirror @lacedprince

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ignore stirling idk how he got on the plane but he’s here now ig 🫩