#sepremefamily

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Tony: Where the hell is Peter?

Harley: He drank 1500 milligrams of coffee and thought the birds were talking shit about him.

Peter: Fight me! I am sound!

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Peter:What if I start mixing energy drinks and black coffee.

Harley: Hell yeah, there's no god here to judge us.

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Stephen: Peter, sit. We have to talk.

Tony: Well kid, the truth is...you're adopted.

Peter(crying): Wait, really?

Tony: Yeah, the paperwork was signed this morning. Welcome home.

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"Celebrating Halloween once a year is weak. Live in my house for a week. You'll know real fear.

- Tony watching Peter stalk across the ceiling with glowing eyes

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Peter:*On the ceiling*

Tony:Young man, in this house we obey the laws of physics!

Peter:It's a suggestion for me!

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Peter:*exists*

Tony:

It's a hard job but it must be done.

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Peter: Cap will be mad if we just ditch training.

Stephen: Don't worry we'll cross that bitch when we get to it.

Peter: Don't you mean bridge?

Stephen:Sure

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Stephen:Why is Peter crying over a bowl of icecream.

Tony:He got shot down by his crush at school. Then he called Peter ugly.

Stephen: Poor kid must be blind.

Tony:He will be.