FIRST TIME
A Seungjun x Reader fic (Part 1?)
A/N: warning really long post , smut. High chance out of character writing and portraying . Also, I wrote this with a sudden spark in my head, so I did not bother aka I am lazy to change the wordings to gender neutral this time. Sorry about that, and I hope you enjoy this long-awaited Seungjun version for First Time series .
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Maybe you and Seungjun have known each other since you're young, you two are neighbours, and both of your households are just a few steps away . Both of your family members are on good terms. And you have had a crush with him ever since high school. (But you couldn't bring yourself to tell him about it)
Quick setting of the story will be:
You and Seungjun join the same dance club as both of you share the same passion towards dancing. You two have just graduated from the same university . You are currently job hunting and relaxing after the hectic life of completing your thesis. Taking things slow.
You expect Seungjun to have the same pacing in life, but to your surprise, recently, your family member shared that Seungjun will be heading to the military to serve his duty.You also confronted Seungjun (not in an aggressive manner), he confirmed the news was true. He will be joining the camp 4 months later.
Fast forward to 1 month before Seungjun joins the camp. Your parents and Seungjun's parents went out to a 5 days trip. His sisters are not in either. You told Seungjun that you are lonely and bored at home, a solid reason for you to hang out at Seungjun's home during day time.So you thought...
"Seungjun-ah, why did you decide to serve the military at this timing?" You asked the young man sitting at the opposite couch while petting Vell, Seungjun's family pet dog, which was sitting in your lap.
"Why suddenly ask?" Seungjun questioned you back while his fingers were busy tapping on the controls from table tennis game app on his phone.
Seungjun continued with a chuckle, "Is someone going to feel lonely when I am gone for 2 years? Bt the way, you better hone up your Mario Kart skills when I am gone. It is a bore when you are bad at it."
"Ummm...Won't your girlfriend be sad?" You raised the question.
His fingers stopped. And he raised his head,adjusting the position of his eyes so that they were fixed on your face. "My girlfriend? Who? Since when?" Seungjun raised one side of his eyebrow in disbelief.
You can not believe your ears, and you retorted, "Soomin in our dance club? You are quite friendly with her, so I thought..." You started firmly but end up lowering your voice more and more.
"She is not my girlfriend, I don't have one." There was no hesitation in his voice. He was telling the truth. "But,..."
"But?" You repeated.
"I am thinking of completing my military serving period first before I confess to someone I really like." Seungjun's eyes moved back to his phone screen when he confessed.
Seungjun has a crush on someone? That is something you do not know of! Was it someone from dance club? Or was it someone else back in university?
"I don't want them to wait for me blankly, and..."
"And...?"
Seungjun let out a sigh, put away his phone, and looked at you again with a serious look, "I don't know if they feel the same way as I do."
You don't know how to react, and you could feel your cheeks getting red. It must be due to you failing to tease him. Definitely not because of his handsome face and intense eyes staring at you. "So, who is the lucky person? It must be Soomin, right?" You avoided his gaze and turned to Vell.
"Now that's odd. Why do you keep thinking it was her Y/N ah? I am equally friendly with the membersin dance club." Seungjun voiced out his doubt. "As if you are trying to make a match out of Soomin and me..."
You can only awkwardly laugh and denied it.
"You are jealous of her, aren't you..."
"No, I am not." You quickly cut him off, but you still could not bring yourself to look at him while talking. "There are rumours between the dance club members..." You tried to brush it off with excuses.
Without a word, Seungjun pushed himself up from the couch he was sitting and walked towards the couch you were sitting.
You panicked as he sat beside you, closing the distance between you two. Out of instinct, you jolted up with Vell in your arms. Because of your sudden actions, it startled Vell a little, so it jumped off from your arms.
As you are standing up now, you get to see Seungjun's expression. It was the expression you hate. He has that smirk on his face. It's his "I won" face. In just milliseconds, you understood that he was clearly enjoying teasing you. You were already his prey before you knew it.
"That's not nice of you." You pouted.
"Same here." He retorted while smiling.
You know there will be no progress like this, so you changed your tone while sitting back beside him. " ok, seriously. Why chose to admit in a hurry?"
"Like I said, it is because I don't want the person I like to wait for me. " Seungjun's words felt sincere.
Your heart sank. So he really has someone in mind huh, you thought to yourself. You wanted to say something, but you ended up muttering a weak , "I see..."
You don't have the courage to pry further about the person he likes, but you thought to yourself, 'Can I really let him go just like that?'
The answer is definitely no. A big no. You can still play it cool if it was Soomin. But now, not knowing who the person is was causing insecurity to suffocate you even more. A train of thoughts runs in your head, and you broke the silence by dropping a bomb,
"Seungjun, let's do it."
"Huh??" Seungjun was baffled. He got even more so when you start shifting your position, making an attempt to straddle him.
"Hey!" He exclaimed, grabbing your wrists, trying to stop you. "Y/N!" He called out your name,hoping it will pull you back to senses.
"You've been acting weird since a while ago!" Seungjun pushed you away. "Asking about me having a girlfriend or whatnot, you never used to care about that..."
After a few trials, knowing that you can't win against him by force, you eventually gave up. You sat on his knees wearily, and both of your hands fell on your lap. Seungjun's large hands were still grabbing onto your wrists, but his grip was now much loosened.
Should you say something? Brushing it off as a joke? Or maybe run back with all your night now without leaving a word?
Breathing heavily with your head lowered, you were at the verge of crying. You couldn't tell it was due to regret of doing something reckless or the sadness because Seungjun was pushing you away. Now that you have done it, will you be losing him for good ? You could feel his eyes locked on you, observing you.
(You did not notice Seungjun clicked his tongue out of frustration and he shifted)
While you were occupied in your mind, you felt yourself being pushed down, and your back came in contact with the couch seat cushion. Before you can do anything (or even say anything), your lips were sealed by the young man who was pinning you down.
Passionately, Seungjun nibbled, sucked and left a few pecks on your lips. It was not rough, but it made you even more confused. Thinking the act was a payback by him, you broke it off once you got the chance. But his right hand reached out to your face, cupping your left cheek. With a slight push, your lips are back into the position he could access. You two kissed for the second time.
But he was slower this time. While at it, his thumb brushed your chin. With a bit of force, he got your mouth opened a little, and he slipped his tongue in.
"Mmmpfffhhh..." You moaned in surprise at the moment his tongue touched yours. Your free hand reached out to his shoulder. Instead of pushing him away, you clutched to his shirt. He showed no signs of stopping.
You slowly tried to reciprocate his actions, and he became more eager. Not long after, you both find yourselves slowly hugging each other while kissing. Now, this was beyond expectation. What on earth is happening ? He agreed? But he was clearly rejecting the idea a moment ago...
Just then, Seungjun broke off the kiss. You two were gasping for air. You only realised you shed tears when Seungjun, panting while staring at you, wiped off a trail of moisture from under your right eye.
"Y/N..." He called out.
You can only stare back at him, your mind already playing the worst case Scneario where he will start cackling and tell you it is all a joke. A payback towards your reckless action a few minutes ago.
As he spoke, you felt Seungjun's voice trembling. "I am tired of holding back already."
Your expression turned to confusion. Seeing your expression, Seungjun backed up and pulled some distance. You slowly pushed yourself up, wondering what does his words meant.
Seungjun's face looked like he was in pain. Before you opened your mouth, he said. "It was you all along, Y/N."
"I realised my feelings during 2nd year uni. Being told by one of our male dance club members that my gaze follows your whereabouts too often. " You listened to him while biting your underlip and questioned if you were still in reality. You lowered your head, eyeballs moving side to side. You were trying to think of a comeback /countermeaseure for the worst scenario.
"Me?" You blurted You don't understand why he looked like he was in agony when he was saying it. And that expression of his was so familiar. As if looking into mirror, it resonated. But you couldn't help yourself worrying if this was all just an act. Luring you to believe him and then later let karma hit you for initiating that brash action earlier. Seeing you are stunned, Seungjun continued.
His right hand reached out to you, slided his hand towards your left cheek. With a bit of force,he lifted your face so that both of your eyes met. He caressed your cheek with his thumb as he continued his words."It was hard for me, Y/N. You never knew how others see you. And you never knew my effort of killing their imaginations seeing you as ..."
"Seungjun...hold up," You stopped him, tearing up. "You are not making things up, right?"
" Given that we just kissed." Seungjun sighed. "I don't see the need to lie, Y/N-ah."
"So, it's not an act to trick me as a payback? " You timidly asked. And your question successfully irritated him a little. He grabbed your chin with his right hand again, engaging eye contact.
"That kiss was a payback, but it is not an act." With a frown, Seungjun mumbled and pulled you closer to him. You lost your balance, making you were now on all fours. Your hands were on his right thigh, supporting yourself. "Enough of me talking, your turn."
You gulped as he moved his face closer towards yours.
"I don't recall you being someone who would suggest doing it out of sudden and for fun." Seungjun squinted, and his tone was cold. "And judging from how you are reacting, you don't seem to be aware of my feelings either. You have a habit of biting the right side of your lower lip when you are confused."
You shivered and avoided his stare. Did things just get even more out of hand? And what's with this tension? It's so unbearable, and it's killing you from within. Was he angry? Of course, he has the right to be angry. You could only bring yourself mumbling softly, "I..."
"I need answers Y/N-ah." His whispers softened, but his gaze was still piercing. "We need to be on the same page. Now."
You pounced towards him and wrapped your arms around his shoulders. Your hands were clutching and tugging the fabric of his T shirt. "I am sorry, I messed up. It was not on a whim, I thought it was just puberty when I first found out I have a crush on you. But.." you whimpered. "I got jealous of the person who was in your mind, and I acted heedlessly."
He took some time to process and smiled in content when he finally heard your true feelings. "So you liked me too." Seungjun concluded. "Desperately."
You nodded, buried your head to his chest even deeper. you could feel him patting your head.
"Let me guess, " Seungjun's tone softened even more, it is now back to his normal tone. "You are thinking of doing it with me and then later run back to your home, locks yourself in your room until the day I join the military."
Hearing this, you backed up and looked at him in awe. He was accurate.
"What are you? A psychic?" You pouted and out of embarrassment, you landed a few light hits on his shoulders. "I am so embarrassed at myself that I want to end my life right now!"
"And then you are planning to find a job somewhere far from this city, so that we don't meet again when I got discharged 18 months later." Seungjun continued with his smirk . Accurate again.
Seungjun let out a few laughs. He then grabbed gently grabbed your hands and kissed your knuckles. "You will regret it if you were to do that before doing it with me."
You flushed red immediately hearing him. You tried to pull your hands away (and also your distance), but he won't let you.
"Seriously, I don't get you, Y/N." Seungjun commented while clearly enjoying seeing you being flustered and trying to get away from him. "Some moments I can read you like an open book, but sometimes I couldn't even tell."
You stopped struggling and countered, "Back at you. Aaah, this is so awkward right now. I even put up such an embarrassing show..."
Before you could finish, his hands at your back gave you a slight push. Your lips touched his again.
After breaking the kiss, he then rested his hands beside your waist, letting out a sigh of relief before saying, "Now that we cleared things up, do you still wanna do it?"
You looked back at him, confused. But it took you no time to understand him. You blushed again and tried to escape him.
Seungjun chuckled at your reaction and pulled you closer, bear hugging you. While at it, he whispered into your ears, "Can we? I will be gentle. Knowing you are the same, I can't wait anymore. The shackles already went loose when I kissed you. "
Indulged to his warmth, you gave your consent. "But let's be prepared first, it's my first time... Can I head back to shower?"
He pushed you away from him, breaking off the hug. "You can head back to take your change of clothes . We can shower together if you don't mind. I can run to the store to get some condoms. Hmm.. maybe some hot food to microwave for dinner. What else do you need? "
You shook your head as you could not think of anything else. "I think those are everything."
Seungjun gently left a peck on your right cheek and tried to get up from the couch. You got up as well. "Alright, let's meet up back here in 30 mins. Do remind me to put out Vell's dinner before we shower." And both of you head out from Seungjun's home.
30 minutes later, you both are back as promised. You reminded him to put our Vell's dinner. And once he was done, he asked for your hand, and he gently he said, " Come, it's time to pamper another pabo kangaji/stupid puppy."
You cringed to his words, but not annoyed. Your reactions made him laugh heartily.
Seungjun literally barged into the bathroom, pulling you into the room. And before you could stand still, he cornered you, and pushed you to come close to the wall tiles of the bathroom. Seungjun then grabbed the back of your neck and started an intense kiss with you as if that 30 minutes took 30 years for you two to reunite.
It took you by surprise, but you quickly composed yourself. You gave his right shoulder a few taps hinting him that you need air. He then let go of you, and you smirked.
"Geez, can't even wait until we are in bed? Or are you planning to fxck me in the bathroom all along? Ha! I knew it when you suggested both of us to shower together. " You found him losing his cool was funny, but you still want to provoke him a little.
"Oww..." You yelped. "You said you will be gentle!"
"I was planning to take things slow but..." the man muttered . With his hand still at your neck, he got closer to the side of your neck area, and gave you a bite near your left collarbone.
"Not when you are playing with fire, Y/N ah." He replied while softly nibbling the marks he left on your skin. "Be glad that I did not lose control when we were making out at the couch earlier. I am still fighting it."
Seungjun advanced to lick your jawline, sniffing your scent while at it. Both of his hands moved downwards and now cupping your breasts, gently massaging them. You turned your head to your right out of embarassment with your eyes shutted and your hands latched on his wrists unconsciously, but he knew you are not signalling him to stop.
"That was unexpectedly lewd." Seungjun whispered as he kissed your throat. "Didn't know you can sound this lovely."
"Aaah...Mmmph..." When he nibbled your earlobe, you let out a sensual voice without realising it .
You were still overwhelmed by the sensation of his touch and kisses . You could not comprehend his words . Faintly you could hear the echoes of your moans even though you did your best to muffle them down. The embarassment felt fatal .
And then you realised his hands were already groping your bottom, you could feel his left leg came between your legs and slowly nudging your crotch . You gained back to your senses a bit and gave Seungjun a push , "Seungjun-ah, please , not here..." You shrank into his chest due to the uncomfortness coming from the friction of the cloth between your legs . "Not when I am still unshowered."
"Maybe just a bit?" Seungjun slide his right hand back up to cup your left cheek before he affectionately trying to make you agree towards his impulse . "I don't mind actually."
He tried to kiss you but you dodged him , once again you tried negotiate with him while looking him into his eyes , " Seungjun please... "
You clenched on the fabric of his shirt at his chest area , trembling . Not sure it was due you being nervous of making such a daring progress with the person you had a crush for years or ,
You couldn't even believe finding yourself saying to him , " I will let you do whatever you want with me later , so let's hit pause for a bit , can we?"
To that , Seungjun responded by grabbing your neck and landed his lips onto yours . No words from him , just an extremely amorous and long kiss . He only broke it when he felt both of you nearly ran out of air .
Panting heavily , you heard him giving you the reply to your suggestion earlier , "Fine , it's a deal . Just don't regret it later. "
** End of Part 1?**
A/N final note on 06th Oct : Was suppose to post this on ONF month but things and tech issue happened so I posted this privately first and edit it later . I don't know when I can finish part 2 and this idea already in my draft for really long time . And I took waaaaaayyyyy too much time to brush this up so...
Anyways, hope you guys really enjoyed this for now . Thanks for reading up till here .