#sgpfriends

[skinnyproblems]

i get uncomfortable when i have to eat lunch in front of my friends at school, because they aren't exactly thin/healthy and they often talk about (like i'm not there) how i always seem to eat a lot and never gain weight and they make me feel guilty about having a thin body. they are really mean to me most of the time but i feel like i can't call them out on it because i don't have any other friends.

Wow, I can imagine. If you are going to lose friends because they are not being friends, then let that be. I promise you, when you lose something, you’ll gain something better.

Make new friends, go out there and converse with other people, form stronger bonds with existing associates. People who make you feel bad about yourself are not to be mistaken as friends. They are simply companions. Believe in your self-worth, build confidence in yourself and decide that happiness is more important that company that brings you down.

[skinnyproblems]

It's sad how you learn to feel guilty about your body when you're a skinny person. People give you the feeling you're making them feel bad about themselves just by being there. That compliment of "I wished I looked like you" is nothing to be proud of because it implies I make you unhappy with your body and it's my fault because of the way my body looks. I'm not allowed to have any insecurities and opinions, and I can't be proud of my body either, so I just keep saying I'm sorry for my body.

So perfectly put. Exactly. Many of these compliments aren’t really compliments, or taken as compliments.

[skinnyproblems]

Hi, I liked you blog. I am 22, 180 cm tall weighing only 48 kg. I have some friends who are much younger than me, just about 18. They are also much shorter than me but weigh more than twice of me. They like to over power me. They usually lift me up, bear hug me nearly to death etc. They insult me by beating me easily in arm wrestling. I don't tease them for being so fat. I don't really understand so why do they tease me. I don't know what to do. Please tell me what can I do.

>> How can I love My Body

I posted something on why your environment, which includes friends has a significant influence over your self-esteem. 

They aren’t good friends if they hurt you. Give them the chance by telling them to stop because of how it honestly makes you feel. If you have opened up, and they continue to make you feel bad (to boost their egos and feel funny and empowered) create a new space for new friends. They are not worth your happiness.

[skinnyproblems]

If you are someone who doesn't believe in skinny shaming then think about boys. Boys get made fun of all the time for not being "buff" enough (especially thin athletes) and get told that no girls will find them attractive, or that they are not "manly enough". If you haven't witnessed a girl being skinny shamed then you have definitely heard at least once a group of guys making fun of how "weak" and "girlish" a guy looks because he's thin.

Exactly. People cannot act like they have never witnessed skinny shaming throughout their young lives.

[skinnyproblems]

Newsflash: if you say things like: -"you're flatter than a surfboard" -"you look anorexic" -"boys like bigger girls because they're prettier" to your friends, you're skinny shaming them. And yes, you can be skinny and be body shamed. So for whatever reason behind it, never say these things, not even as a joke.

dear friends,

[skinnyproblems]

I am two seconds away from exploding on my friends. I was up getting lunch and as I approached I saw them all looking at me and giggling. Once I sat down everyone returned back to what they were previously doing. I didn't want to ask what it was about because unfortunately I already know what it's about, me, and how skinny I am and how I have no boobs or a butt. I really want to make it obvious to them that it's not funny WHATSOEVER but I don't think they'll understand because I'm "skinny".

Next time, speak your mind so you can live a happy life with friends who won’t bring you into depression. 

[skinnyproblems]

So Friday at lunch my friends again brought up my boob size. One friend (with bigger boobs) claimed I wear a training bra and then my guy friend practically ran off with this idea and continued talking about my boobs. I gave both of them death glares and don't them to seriously stop talking about my boobs. But of course this resulted in a roar of laughter. I want to tell them how it personally hurts me but I know they'll claim "I'm overacting" or a lot of skinny girls get bfs too.

I’m disgusted that this guy was discussing your breasts - your personal body part.

[skinnyproblems]

think that saying stuff like that is okay or funny. It's really the same as me telling him he has a small d*ck. and as much as a lot of guys try to conceal it, they are hurt by that statement, especially when it implies that that makes them unattractive or less desirable.

Ugh, it pains me so much that you had to ignore that. I’ve had guy friends talk about girl assets around me (“guy talk”) but they would never dare involve me or point at me. That would just be rude. That guy was being rude to you, and the girls probably laughed because it benefitted them.

But girls, never accept a compliment from a guy at the expense of another woman - especially your friend. You guys did not sign up for that battle and it is unfair. The guy feels like a king because he thinks he has done something right. No way.