'Sup nerds they let me out of the psych ward so get ready for your resuming Shane programming
We'll start with What a Glorious day being almost a year old and still my most popular one shot.
This is what they all see when Shane opens the door btw. From the talented @g0blinsprout
I know - hairy tiddies - we're blessed
What A Glorious Day - Shanex♀Reader - 1981 words - Explicit
Formatting sucks cause I was a ao3 chicklet and I'm too lazy to change it just now.
MDNI and everything.
‘The wedding was great, wasn’t it?’
Following an idea of Mayor Lewis, the entirety of Pelican Town is heading to the farm. Better than admitting that he forgot to give you their wedding gift, he pretends he had planned to give it as a group the next day.
‘Why did we have to be so early though.’
Most young adults are recovering from the reception.
‘She’s a farmer, they’ll be up.’
‘Anyone saw them leave the reception last night?’ Asks Marnie, Jas trailing behind in her hand.
‘They just up and disappeared, did they not?’ Shrugs Gus, a bit saddened the newlyweds didn’t stay long enough to try his new deviled eggs recipe.
‘From their own wedding reception, how rude.’
‘Right, Pierre’ Laughs Caroline ‘ Like you cared at all while slumped over the bar.’
‘Open bar, may I add. Right?’ He shouts to the back of the cohort.
‘Ugh, don’t scream like that, dad.’
‘My head…’ Moans Sam, holding Vincent with a limp arm.
‘Nobody forced you to drink that much.’ Snaps Jodi.
‘It’s a wedding, of course we’ll drink. Wasn’t expecting to have to wake up with the chickens the very next day.’ Groans Sebastian, head in his hood.
‘Speaking of, pleasantly surprised by Shane not having a single drink.’
‘Well Marnie, you know he’s not had a drink for ages. Besides, he was too busy with the farmer…’
‘Lewis!’
‘Heh, perhaps this is why they left “early”...’
No other sounds are heard apart from the slow steps of everyone in the dirt path.
‘What do you mean, Elliott?’
‘Oh, Penny, bless your heart.’
‘You know what’s..expected after a wedding, right?’
‘Alex, we have actual kids here, pipe down.’
Some throats are being audibly cleared.
‘Speaking of…Do you think it’s a sensible idea to…’
Too late, they’re at your farm. The sun shines on all the bountiful crops. Bleatings and mooings can be heard.
‘Oh the poor things, sound like they’re hungry.’ Pities Marnie.
‘That’s not possible, she’s nothing but diligent on all the feedings and tending!’
They walk to your house. The dry soil makes them realize you’ve not watered anything yet. Bizarre. They’re used to more assiduousness in your daily tasks. Your pet’s water bowl is even empty. The younger villagers start snickering.
‘What’s so funny?’ Snaps Lewis.
‘I mean…’ Abigail starts, in between laughs.
A heavy “thump” is heard from the house.
‘Surely they can’t be fighting. Already?’
‘If they’re fighting, Shane’s winning.’
‘Vincent! Get down that crate this instant!’ Loudly whispers Jodi, snatching her son from the window from which she takes a peek. ‘Oh.’
She quickly retreats, signing to everyone else to do the same.
‘What?’
A collective ‘Ooh.’ erupts from the crowd as they eventually understand. They’re quickly gone from your property. However the younger ones have a better idea.
‘That’s uh, impressive.’ Gulps Maru, lending her window view to the next one.
‘Your mom built them a squeaky bed.’ Jokes Sam to Seb, joining him by the window.
‘The sound of the bed is what shocks you? Not Shane’s… stamina?’ He retaliates.
‘If that’s what beer and pizza gives you, why am I bothering with eggs and training?’ Laments Alex, looking away.
‘They’re still at it.’
‘Abby get down, we shouldn’t be watching.’
‘You can stop watching, but I know you want me to narrate.’ She laughs, without being contradicted. Penny slowly joins her.
‘Aw, her wedding dress is on the floor.’ She says, as she sees your hastily discarded garment. Hopefully from where she is, she cannot see the tears,other snatched laces, and even teeth marks Shane left on your dress as you finally arrived in your now conjugal bed. The mere mention of you finally being his wife was enough to drive him crazy, and he was going to show you how great he would be at disrespecting you each time you’d walk the threshold of your bedroom.
‘Hey Emily, when she comes to you for mending don’t judge her too harshly.’ Abby is finding the whole ordeal very amusing, and cannot stop peeking at the window.
‘Do you think they just came home, got themselves naked and just went at it?? And…Are like that since last night?’ Emily says back.
‘That’s not physically possible.’ Haley scoffs, trying to look disinterested, on her toes from the porch.
‘I mean, with breaks. I see wrappers on the floor and’
‘Oh, fuck Abby can you stop scanning the whole room?’
‘Seb wants your focus on the bed.’ Sam laughs. ‘Hey, hands where I can see them!.’
‘I’m grabbing a cigarette, you perv.’
‘We’re all pervs.’ States Emily. ‘And I’m the oldest here. I should tell you all to stop this.’
But they don’t. They stop talking, but it only accentuates the sounds coming from the poorly sealed window. Shane is grunting as he makes you squeal, beg. Your voice only ever muffled by his wet kisses. The level of your moans growing as he groans ‘You love that huh? Come on, cum again for your husband.’. He feels your inside clenching at his voice, the sole allusion that Shane is your husband makes you quiver. Knowing that this is your husband’s cock hard at work against your plushy walls, and that it belongs to Shane, is more than efficient to make you see stars and leak all over him.
‘He’s…really making our farmer scream isn’t he.’
‘They both sound like they’re having a good time.’
‘We should stop watching. Aw they’re holding hands.’
‘Penny, only you and Abs are watching right now.’ Seb points, smoke escaping from his smirk.
‘We should have stopped twenty minutes ago! As the oldest I take responsibility and’ Emily was about to grab Abigail and Penny but is stopped by the view. ‘Who knew Shane was this…potent.’
‘Isn’t there something quite enticing?’ Laughs Abigail, welcoming Emily at the window.
‘No’ She shakes her head. ‘It’s so wrong!’
‘I think it’s the tenderness and the…’
‘Roughness?’
‘Girls, can you PLEASE stop analyzing our friends’ love making?’
Sam, Seb, and Alex are down the porch, hands in their pockets, looking away.
‘Wait, wait.’ Abby says. ‘He’s…Oh Yobba he’s a healthy man! He’s falling on her chest, she’s shaking..’
She describes your arms wrapping around Shane, sweat falling on his back and forehead, resting on your bare chest as he gave you yet another orgasm. You’re both trying to find a steady breath, but cannot resist each other's lips. ‘I love you.’ You whisper to your husband, his head on your forehead, looking straight into your satisfied eyes. You feel his exhausted cock twitch inside of you, as if the words were enough to start him again. ‘I…love you’ Shane says back in between breaths. ‘I love you so much.’ he repeats, his sweaty hair finding the warm groove of your neck. You feel his hot breath on your chest, the fast thumping of his heart against your damp skin. His hand on your breast, his lips peppering kisses on the soft skin of your throat as if to apologize for the rough teeth marks he left all over, that you will carry for days. Showing off that you belong to him.
‘Haley what the fuck are you doing??’
‘The lighting is too good.’ She quickly whispers, snapping a picture of your intertwined bodies, falling into bliss.
‘Never going to look at Shane the same way now.’ Says Maru who joined the herd of men, clearing her throat.
‘Can’t believe he hid that from us, from me! His favorite coworker!’
They all laugh as they finally leave the window.
‘He belongs to the farmer now anyway.’
‘Lucky lady…’ Whispers Penny ‘Hopefully that won’t affect the farm, right?’
They all look around your farm. One day of negligence won’t really be of any harm. But they need something to clean their mind.
‘We owe it to them.’ Ventures Alex.
‘Yeah, that’s the least we can do.’ Joins Seb.
But they stay a long time standing without looking at each others.
‘So, do we start?’
‘Give us a second, Penny.’
After a while the door swings open.
‘Aah!’ they scream.
Shane, coffee in hand, an old pair of joggers on his worn out body, appears on the porch.
‘Good…Morning?’ He starts in a raspy voice, surprised to see such a crowd.
They all get flustered, stammering one after the other. Emily takes a deep breath and starts.
‘How’s your coffee?’ She shouts clumsily. ‘I mean, enjoying yourself? I mean, enjoying your coffee? Outside? What a glorious day.’
Shane looks at all the faces one by one.
‘Erm’ he starts. ‘Can I help you?’
‘We’re here to give you two your wedding gift.’
‘But Mayor Lewis has it.’
‘And he left.’
Shane’s confusion grows as their malaise expands.
‘Ok.’ He laughs, leaning on the door’s frame, pulling some of his wild sweaty hair falling away from his content face. ‘Thanks for coming to the wedding, actually.’
‘You left before we could even say congrats, man.’ Says Sam, faking being hurt.
‘Surely had an itch to scratch.’
‘Sebastian shut up.’
‘Right.’ Shane chuckles. ‘Sorry ‘bout that. Needed to rest and all.’ He clears his throat, sipping on his coffee.
They laugh awkwardly, in false understanding, knowing fully well what had happened.
‘We thought you might need some help around the farm, after last nigh…evening.’ Maru says, keeping them all on track.
‘Yes!’ Excitedly pipes Haley. ‘That’s why we’re here, cause we certainly didn’t hear or see anything and.’
Emily slaps the back of her head before whispering.
‘You’re staring at his crotch.’
‘Is everything ok, Love. Oh.’
You appear at the door, a bathrobe tightly around your waist. You’re about to remove your hands from Shane but swiftly remembers that you’re married, and he’s yours. Despite his clear and usual abhorrence of public display of affection, he grabs you by the waist, bringing you to his warm embrace. After all, you’re his wife, and they are the intruders. It’d be rude not to show you how proud of his wife Shane truly is.
‘They’re here to…help around the farm? If I got it right?’
They quickly nod.
‘You must be exhausted.’
‘You’ve been very busy.’
‘Very very very busy.’
‘Guys!’ Maru snaps, blushing heavily.
‘I’m not against it.’ You say, your hand secretly rubbing Shane’s back. ‘I wouldn’t mind just… resting with my husband.’ You add, grabbing his firm buttocks in your needy hand.
‘Thanks guys.’ Shane swiftly says, pushing you back in and closing the door, rebecoming the animal he was all night.
They exhale, more or less proud of themselves for keeping a straight face.
‘So uh, where do we start?’
‘Do you think they’re at it again?’ Abigail laughs.
‘Surely not!’
They pause, looking away or at their feet.
‘That’s not love at this point.’ Says Sebastian, lighting another cigarette. ‘That’s just lust.’
‘No no, it’s definitely love.’
‘Abby how the fuck are you back at the window?!’
‘Oh yeah, she loves Shane’s assets alright.’
‘Sam for Yoba’s sake don’t join her. Can’t you do like Maru and Penny? They’re already gone feeding the sheep.’
‘Is that a euphemism?’ Haley laughs, walking towards the farm, not making Emily laugh one bit.
They watch you as you show Shane, your husband, how appreciative you are of all he’s done for your body all night. You’re kneeling in front of him sitting on the bed, his joggers barely down, his rough hand holding your hair, grabbing your skull, as you slowly stroke him, your tongue playing, teasing, tasting him. He groans, impatient, his hand shaking on the back of your head. And you take him whole.
Outside the window, they gasp.
‘Well.’ Abby starts, a grin on her face. ‘Shane must be pleased that his wife…’
‘Abby…’
‘Knows her way…’
‘Abs I swear to Yoba and all that is dear.’
‘Around a cock!’
