#sdv shane

[ask-shane]

Who's your favorite SpongeBob character? This is a very important question that will impact the way I view you as a person.

the older i get, the more i understand squidward as a character.

[ask-shane]

I got a buddy in zuzu city saying the farmer is gonna marry clint what do u think about that. another loser bachelor for the farmer lol now u have competition

wow. don’t say “another loser bachelor” as if CLINT and i are remotely on the same level. i’m no saint, but don’t bring me down to his level.

[horridcacophony]

Feeling stuff about Shane Stardew Valley again

(Gonna pretty explicitly reference suicide, both in game and irl)

When I first played stardew valley, it was just added to gamepass. I played video games all night, went to school all day, sleeping only whenever my body let me, and never really feeling like I contributed to society in any meaningful way.

It became my escape. More than any fallout game, skyrim, or any of the other open world thing I played where I could be something other than myself for a moment. It wasn't healthy in any way how much I relied on these games to wake up in the morning, but it kept me alive so I genuinely can't be mad now.

I liked how many monotonous and repetitive tasks there were. I liked how a single look at a guide could let me dig into every single character. I liked how easy it was to marry and discard those characters just to know what they would do in my home. I hated Shane.

Shane with his mean attitude and destructive coping mechanisms. Shane with his dirty ass room, and his unwillingness to accept help until he was literally on the edge. Shane who, when you helped him, didn't mysteriously get better but instead kept some of his rude attitude and kept going to the bar afterwards even when he knows it's not good for him to be in that space.

I spent so long trying to figure him out, picking him apart every single playthrough just because he didn't make sense, divorcing him just to see him sad again. He deserved to be sad. I wanted him to be sad. He was better sad.

I deserved to be sad.

Then I got better, had some friends help me out of a bad situation, moved away from a place that really couldn't handle my issues, and lived like an actual person for the first time. I played stardew for the first time in a while shortly after, and finally understood why I hated him. He reminded me so much of myself I felt genuinely repulsed by him.

Destructive habits, a mean personality to push people away, just wanting to be left alone to wallow in self pity. Liking repetitive schedules, doing the same thing every single day even if it really isn't good for you. Eating trash, living in trash, treating himself and others like trash.

(The first time I got to his 6 heart event, I thought the wrong choice would actually send him over the edge. I wanted him to die. I wanted to see how the townspeople would react, if they'd be sad or if they'd be happy he was finally gone.)

(I used to fantasize a lot about killing myself when I was younger. Doing some brutal thing to myself, splattering myself across the walls or maybe just jumping off the roof of the old giant parking garage across from where I had my prom. I wanted it to hurt, and I wanted everyone to feel so bad that, somehow, I'd know. Even in death, I wanted to know how the people I loved would react to me dying. To planning my funeral. To seeing my gravestone. I wanted to know what they'd write on it.)

(I wanted to see his gravestone in that small cemetery, and I wanted to have the option to place flowers there. To mourn a man I didn't even like, that I pushed to his death. I wanted the guilt to consume me.)

Obviously, I don't think much about that time of my life anymore, but I still look at shane and think what would have happened to me if I stayed where I was. If I continued living in trash. If I continued to treat everyone I loved like trash.

He's a funhouse mirror version of my younger self that I can actually fix. Even if he still has some bad habits, even if his room is a mess, even if his sweater still has a stain on it from being unwashed.

(Some days I am my old self again, and I wallow in self pity, in a dirty room, In my dirty clothes, desperately just wanting something I can control. Something that proves I am real, that I'm contributing something, anything, to society.)

It rains in game, and he says he doesn't feel like doing anything today. I kiss him, because I understand days like that. Days where I am not a person, where I can't do anything. Days where, if I had someone right beside me, someone who loved me and wanted me safe and drew me from the worst part of my life, I'd want them to hold me tight all day.

(Never romantically, because that's not my happy ending. But a friend? A partner? I'd adore that. )

Okay that got kinda dark, end rant 🫡

[f0xofspades]

Some more Shane drawings! First one is an attack on artfight ft. Farmer Rosalie. Second one is Shane and my farmer being all soggy.

[phthalodreams]

you, me, and alcoholism <3

[mongoosingisme]

Hi mongoose! Where would you rank the big 3 at giving the best massages? I see a strong argument for Harvey making #1 but I could see Shane as a dark horse in that race too.

Hi Anon!

I love this question, but my answer is going to feel like a cop out because I think each bachelor is #1 in a different category.

Number one massage giver for overall restoration and health? Absolutely Harvey, no question. The man understand the human body, and what’s more he understands you. He watches what you do and how you move. He picks up on small changes in how you hold yourself that betray underlying discomfort or injury. He has the knowledge to address these issues and the willingness to put in as much time and effort as necessary to get you feeling better. There’s nothing he finds more satisfying than keeping you feeling your best, and it absolutely comes out in his massages.

Number one massage giver for deep, thorough massages? Absolutely Shane. He has the edge on Harvey here because he’s much more used to physical activity and he’s stronger. He didn’t learn about physical therapy in school - he went through it while he was playing gridball. All of that translates into a very intuitive approach. Think big, strong hands that absolutely refuse to back down from any knot you need relieved. Plus, Shane always feels a little like he has something to prove, so he’s gonna put in the work to see you satisfied, no matter how long it takes.

Which brings us to Elliott. He doesn’t have Harvey’s expertise or Shane’s instincts, but he absolutely makes up for it with ambiance and vibes. He doesn’t give you a massage: he provides a full sensory experience. Fresh sheets. Mood lighting. Soft music. Aromatic oils (he knows your favorites and always has them on hand). Cool water with cut up fruit in it. His technique is more “let me touch you in a way that feels good” than it is practiced. I think he’s the most likely of the three to disrobe alongside you, so there’s lots of skin-on-skin over the course of your time together.

Thank you for the ask!!

[thw-sss]

ungrateful dihhh 💔💔💔

[f0xofspades]

Sunnyside - Chapter 36

Excerpt: Jas could adore her new friend all she wanted to, but if Shane were being honest, he found the eyeless white slits and the endless rows of shark-like teeth off putting. Could he take Krobus in a fight? Uh, maybe? The shadow brute was just a little taller than Jas. But huh, that was a fucking stupid train of thought—

“Shane?”

He turned to face Krobus, watching as the shadow brute continued to stare at him.

“Uh, what?”

“I can sense a dark aura around you.”

No shit.

“Do you feel unwell? Or are you in pain?” Krobus sounded genuinely concerned. “Humans are prone to a wide array of illnesses. Rasmodius told me it’s because you have a more vulnerable immune system and are unable to regulate your own temperature like we do.”