#sharing cool content

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We have had the most elegant President Of The United States of America- Thank you Barack Obama for believing in change

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Many of you planned ahead for all of your film picks, coffee hangs and cocktail hours, but if this is your 1st rodeo, nobody tells you -  because there are just too many good films to see all of them, to pick your schedule wisely at Sundance film Festival.

I’ve been here for less than 48 hours and learned the hard way.  Or it could have been because I also didn’t know to only rent a 4 wheel drive. Sadly, trying to be thrifty is not advised when driving up snowy windy mountains. But rather than to overshadow my business to beautiful Park City Utah as they host the greatest film and music party ever, I’ll spare us details of explanation but to note that I hadn’t posted any film reviews yet, and I’ll just save you the sorted debacles which ended in my delight after a 12 hour day in a luxury four-wheel drive upgraded rental.  Now I’m ready to share cool content for the rest of my trip here at Sundance Film Festival…

After my first couple of hours, I got my bearings driving in snow, airbnb, uber, etc..then checked out my 1st film Maggie’s Plan, starring Ethan Hawk, Julianne Moore and Greta Gerwig. It was a great way to end a sunny snowy beautiful afternoon, especially if you’ve ever been fortunate to have ever lived in NYC you know how eccentric we become, and the city itself perpetuates any dynamics within relationships.

The female director Rebecca Miller seemed to stay close to decisions made on style and production. The feel of the film, and the characters themselves were all resembling my NYC and friends in NYC. And, there’s a fondness (at least most people do have ) over their perception of what it is to be New Yorkers. That appreciation for quirk and smarty pants sexy academic character types along with shooting in frigid cold temperature stayed consistent.

The warm and fuzzy feeling you get from romantic comedy stories is topped off by Ethan Hawk’s ability to make it to be a more serious film. Rebecca mostly relies on all her seasoned actors [both Hawk and sometime Moore, but mostly Hawk] breaking from comedy to drama.

You end up sometimes not liking yet understanding them. We care about these characters because they are all complicated, like real humans. Rebecca wants the weight of a troubled family to not look perfect, because as the controlling and manipulation in all of us exists, so does a family story with people we love and care about. When and even if they’re not on their best behavior.

The story is somewhat of a cast of characters where the audience decides to whom they can relate too. It is about a divorced couple, a much younger woman, and everybody’s dream of New York Centric lifestyles. Maggie's Plan is playing on Monday Jan 25 and Saturday Jan 30 at Sundance Film Festival. 

U.S.A. (Director: Rebecca Miller, Screenwriters: Rebecca Miller, based on a story by Karen Rinaldi) The film is written for the screen, produced and directed by Rebecca Miller (THE PRIVATE LIVES OF PIPPA LEE, PERSONAL VELOCITY: THREE PORTRAITS), based on a story by Karen Rinaldi. The film producers are Rachael Horovitz (MONEYBALL), Damon Cardasis with Miller’s Round Films, along with executive producers Phil Stephenson and Temple Williams, Lucy Barzun Donnelly and Alexandra Kerry, and Michael J. Mailis and Susan Wrubel. The creative team includes casting by Cindy Tolan, CSA (STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON), director of photographer Sam Levy (WHILE WE’RE YOUNG), production designer Alexandra Schaller (CUSTODY, THE SILENT TREATMENT), film editor Sabine Hoffmann (THE LAST FIVE YEARS), music by Michael Rohatyn (THE PRIVATE LIVES OF PIPPA LEE), costume designer Malgosia Turzanska (AIN’T THEM BODIES SAINTS), and music supervisor Adam Horovitz (founding member of BEASTIE BOYS).— A young woman’s determination to have a child catapults her into a nervy love triangle with a heart-throb academic and his eccentric critical-theorist wife. Cast: Greta Gerwig, Ethan Hawke, Julianne Moore, Bill Hader, Maya Rudolph, Travis Fimmel.  

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Seen Closet Monster? If that's a no, than I suggest do.

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Protekts' online shop where you can fashion yourself a backpacker like we did throughout Central America.

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News about proteKt

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Life Imitates Art

Maybe movies do effect the way we self actualize.  Life imitated art as an adventure through Central America comes towards its finale. Just the same as Julia Robert’s character in the movie “Eat Pray Love” working out a midlife crisis, I too went about to figure out why I was stuck and doing it as a backpacker having a loose itinerary. In hindsight, I wasn’t just looking for a reason to do what I didn’t do when I was younger, instead, while I went about searching for a challenge , I came to a point where I self analyzed my many reactions to unexpected incidences that led me to just leave situations. And, I finally admitted that it felt good to let people go and not feel guilty that they weren’t people I wanted around in my life anymore. These were my choices and I finally started respecting my decisions. 

However indifferent and ambivalent I may have felt about the nuances of machismo in Latin American culture before and after I arrived some two months ago, as I see it now, I finally figure out how to not allow situations lead to predicate my own reactions. Typical to Latin American cultural, a latino is dominated by status quo.  My optimism in being a single woman was always a challenge for the rest of judge-y Latinos. But, in the last several weeks, it no longer plays a role in effecting my curiosity leading to defensiveness in wanting to push my boundaries. When it comes to an exchange of respecting opinions, and as the male society dictates in Central America, women are not fairly treated. But with gods blessing, I stopped feeling defensive and just decided to be myself.  I didn’t have to act tough to be respected, yet, because I am a feminine person it feels good knowing that I can and do choose my destiny. I've learned that my spirit is moved by compassion and I am not a character in a movie nor a cartoon of a wild Latina “Living The Vida Loca” placed outside of my comforts. 

Vacations vs Life Experiences

The last time I came to Guatemala, I didn’t want my traveling to end.  This time I went back, I decided that It would be good to see the world on my own terms and not as just a tourist passing by nor by my former behavior.  Now, having had ended my journey through tropical Nicaragua, and not as having done before, spent for a vacation just shy of a week ( which was as I felt it - much too short), I went out to traverse the trenches of our worlds footprints in search of answers during a longer stay. And, the outcome was different from a movie. Much like the characters you see in Jula Roberts travels through Bali and Italy, however, and although I tested my limits to have found inner love, this journey was about self realization that can only happen when you decide to be an adult.  

For the past several months I have lived with the same four tshirts and a few pairs of shorts as I documented my travel logs to the notion of packing up and leaving behind who I was. Every once in a while, I missed my NYC apartment, my friends and mostly my comfy bed ( no longer in my apartment), But after waisting time doing things other people wanted me to do, and not having the backbone to just say no, I broke free of my old self by just letting myself be who God wanted me to be without guilt. It came after just letting go of wanting to keep sitting on another chicken bus to see the rest of Central America and it felt good to just sit and relax on a beach. Gone was the ideal of paying nothing and enjoying it for a chance to see the world. So, I put my big girl panties and chilled out. After a few weeks, I wanted to hear the sounds of waves crashing  instead of insults and strong reactions to my honest approach - that didn’t make me any friends…And you know what I think of it now? “Que se joda” ( I don’t care ).  You see because of my frugal desires, I got severely sick with Diarrhea due to unclean food cooked with tap water, was woken up by the sound of midnight cackles of roosters and howling monkeys in a tent, and pretending to like being in a hostel with a shared toilet made me hallucinate I was being eaten by frogs every time I tried to sleep. Therefore, I took a moment to stop and take a breadth to see that sometimes being cheap is not worth the trouble. And, In order to be less paranoid that I was going to get sick from bad restaurants or robbed by vendors selling you stuff, I just started doing exactly what I wanted and sacrificed a lot of my idealized version of what it would be like to travel on a budget by being myself.  A person can only take so much in suffering while sitting on a long bus ride when what you basically sound like is a big baby and sick of your own inner dialogue.

To be honest, prior to my scheduled departure, I wasn’t as much as afraid to see what would happen to me as I was about not knowing how I would react when outside of my supposed control.  My romanticized version of a backpackers life finally became too much of a reality.  I just started to leave a hotel regardless of whatever lonely planet said.  Now I know what you might think... not everybody can afford that kind of traveling but oh indeed everybody can.  If you factor in the time it takes to fall asleep after seeing mold above the sealing drop on your forehead and drinking enough Tonias ( although don’t get me wrong - I LOVE TONA BEER) to make you so drunk you can’t see straight, you could have just as much paid the difference for clean rooms in a nicer place and not have to go all through Central America simply because thats what everybody is doing. You have to be honest with your truth.  For some, not having a clean toilette is a non issue, but some of us do want that as we were raised with clean people.  You can also find short and long term love affairs and admirers… And, just like Julia Roberts’ character, decide that you are never too old to learn and accept your wrongs.   

Life is not a dress rehearsal

My gutt instincts led me to a blue print and test run instead of a life altering 360 degree change. The real me came as a series of lessons after understand what I am capable of and desire as opposed to attempting to prove something. And, its better to get it late in life than not at all. As someone well past their twenty year old thrill seeking party animal self, my maturity blossomed into self actualization.  Thus, I am a “knowing thy self kinda badasserie”. And, in someways indirectly challenging an inner subconscious, I decided to have my eat pray love moment as I was unaware of my own needs and desires.  What I mean is this, i thought of myself as a risk taker and as someone that shared a commonality in upbringing from the poorer communities of Latinos from these countries.  I was 100% wrong. I realized I would be making an attempt to risk NYC to better know myself and my limitations.  But, now acknowledge that I am having an awareness of levels of poverty that was different than actually being born into poverty with no escape.

My father used to always say to me to not act like a gringo.  But he was sadly wrong to suggest such an error because, as he was the product of poverty he thought we were to be destined to it as much as he. He never got to be proud of breaking free and enjoy his successes.  Because of his hard work and living to work with an American standard, I was sheltered from knowing what it was like to not have.  My parents were Latin American but their dream has been lived out through my own experiences.  Although my mother is no longer with us, while she escaped poverty as an orphan of Guatemala, she along with my father led a fierce level of pride in working hard towards the American Dream that manifested in my luxuries.

Unlike most of Central Americans, I was unaware of what it felt like to not have. I bought Betsy Johnson dresses at sixteen, had a car, traveled all around the world curtesy of my dad working for American Airline, and I was never without food on the table.  I had never worried about lacking Xmas presents every year, yet my father’s poor mans’ complex and not feeling worthy of being able to afford things trickled down to my feel uncertain of my financial future.  Thus, because we were made to feel poor, I hadn’t realized that I was far from that and wasn’t like the rest of Latin American’s 3rd world countries.  In fact, I would categorize us as middle class.  My father didn’t realize that by raising us to feel less gainful, we would have a scarcity mentality.  I was stunted in believing that by virtue of my Latina-ness, I too was destined to be poor.  Sadly, it would tough roads ahead for me. Then, I woke to see that my behavior was a version of someone else’s vision for me. I was supposed to act with fear of not having and not embrace doing better than my previous ancestors. However I have done better than my folks. I was doing better than most latinos and not because of my earned income, but because I broke free of wanting to have more shoes and more “THINGS” to make me feel good. Furthermore, as a Latina, I was not try to earn a lot because a man would take care of me.  That game is over, I want to accept that I could earn more and feel good about giving back to others.  And, I hope to be honest about my experiences so to inspire other Latinas feel empowered that they too can journey on their own as I have.  Sharing my experiences via blogs and social media posts, I wanted to bring awareness of the beautiful and rich resources in Central America. I  have to give back where I can, so I shed light on hardworking Expats supporting many groups and their great businesses working towards the greater good of helping Indigenous communities.  Moreover, as I search out charities that we all can get involved with, I am committed to support the poorest of Latin Americans seeking our help by lending my voice where they cannot. Lastly, I am equally proud to tout the artists such as my friend Bassco - our spirits met in an intellectual and creative moment which made my travels so wonderfully joyous and appreciate the great talent Nicaragua has to offer.

The reason you work hard is to able to take a trip of a lifetime as I have. I don’t have to provide to others why I didn’t want to stay in a stinky hostel, but I chose to share it.  I share it because through my experiences I want others to see that its ok to be transparent. And, its ok to have boundaries in traveling, and sharing cool content. Spreading the miracles artists, I hope to give to children and to be generous towards others because I know it will always come back to me. In my parent’s ability to care for our childhood in the best way they knew how, it is now my turn to continue to be as great a role model as I can possibly can to lead as an example of Latina Pride as the very best “LA Woman” and “American Woman” I can. Gone is my living through my parent’s guilt of earning more than above median wage for a 6 grade education.  This is my life and you only live once. 

All photos are my own as photographer Mildred Brignoni - I reserve and copyright all my material here and on any social media network.  Photos cannot be reproduced and must have request to use by sole owner.

If you want to learn more about my travels, project proteKt and see what I am doing on my Facebook