The amount of times I heard this phrase- “She was asking for it.”
Because we were in a relationship.
Because if I loved them I would just do it.
Because I seemed like I wanted it.
Because I said yes once so it was a blanket consent.
Because I didn’t say no enough.
Because I would give in after awhile.
Because I wore crop tops.
Because I wore shorts.
Because my cleavage hung just slightly out of my jersey.
Because I played an oversexualized sport.
Because I was a flirt.
Because I was tease.
Because I danced just the right way to that song.
Because I would sing along to the sexy songs.
Because... because.. because.
I completely lost my sense of self. Lost the joy of doing the things I loved. Lost the love I had for the strength my body. Lost the love for hugs and other small touches of reassurance.
No More... No More.
I will no longer be the victim in my own story.
And in the famous words of Olivia Benson: “I’ll never be over it, but I can live with it now and I have my life back now.”
